


New Life

by RandomPerson2_0



Series: My Future Is Yours and Yours Is Mine [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Abby Being an Asshole, Alpha Lexa (The 100), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Future, Beta Raven Reyes, Death, Enemy Lovers, F/F, F/M, Forced Marriage, Jealous Lexa (The 100), Kidnapping, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Clarke Griffin, Omega Verse, Pheromones, Running Away, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:40:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 50
Words: 94,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26217280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RandomPerson2_0/pseuds/RandomPerson2_0
Summary: Past the dead zone and the thick treed forest, you'll find a camp guarded by a fence. This metal fence protects many things; people, huts, food. Inside you’ll find one certain person. A woman that holds the seven seas in her eyes, hair like all the gold in the world, seen as a beauty to most and a friend to all (give or take a few people, maybe take all). Her name is Clarke Griffin. But there’s more to her than her beauty. She has the curiosity of a child, the looks of Aphrodite, and the adventurous nature of someone who adventures? Dora?Clarke Griffin has a dream that most wouldn’t even consider. Her dream is forbidden among the Skaikru people. She wishes to see the outside world. Live beyond the fence. Most in the camp would want her to leave considering all the trouble she has caused anyways. On a bright and sunny morning it was announced Clarke would be marrying her childhood friend, Wells Jaha. “That’s a big step”, she would think as she gazed beyond the fence. For this step was a step Clarke didn’t want to take. A step she couldn’t take. She has to do something. Was this her chance to make her dream come true? Would she finally be leaving Camp Jaha… for good?
Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Luna/Raven Reyes, Octavia Blake/Lincoln
Series: My Future Is Yours and Yours Is Mine [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1904020
Comments: 10
Kudos: 186





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be a thing at the beginning of the chapter so you guys can understand certain things. I will only put it once.

Beginning note:

I wasn't sure if the actual note section would bold things so . . . here.

_This (things typed out like this) = POV’s thoughts._

**_This = wolf talking._ **

**This = POV responding to wolf but not aloud . . . more of telepathy with another being inside them.**

If I feel like something has to be explained, I’ll never explain the story but like if a text is bolded and italic but no wolf is talking then I’ll explain it in the notes. So look for those.

**********

September 10th, 5057

_Shit._

My body spins in a slow circle as I hang upside down, a rope wrapped around my ankle being the only reason I haven’t fallen yet. My arms sway slightly from side to side as I spin. The idea of trying to escape seems like a foreign idea to me. 

A few trees away from me a stranger’s voice directed at me says, “need my assistance now?”

The stranger, a brunette, has asked that every few minutes ever since I said, “go away. I don’t need your help.”

Lifting my head I manage to look over my shoulder. The forest eyed brunette is leaning against a tree. She uses a knife to sharpen a stick she found on the ground.

_She's gonna kill me . . ._

Dropping my head I start wiggling in hopes I can get my body to face the brunette. “I”, I grunt. “Don’t need your help.”

With those few words, the look of amusement on the brunette’s face only grows. “Right, right”, she says silently. “Cause you’re totally not hanging helplessly by the foot.”

I mutter under my breath, “it’s by the ankle”. Now that I’m no longer wiggling, I start going in slow circles again.

“Well excuse my lack of human anatomy”, the brunette puts the knife away in some secret pocket. “I, the person not hanging from a tree, am going to go study human anatomy”, she puts the stick in her belt. There’s a few seconds of silence before she says, rather bratty, “I doubt I’ll have trouble finding you.”

“Pfft, why even bother coming back?”

I can feel her looking at me. I know she hears my question yet I get no answer. 

I risk a quick glance over my shoulder. As I expected the brunette is walking away. She has her hands behind her back as she takes wide but slow steps away from me.

My body goes in another circle.

_I don’t need your help._

I go in about two more circles before I cave in.

“Ugh!”, I groan. “Fine! I need your help!”

The brunette is quick to turn around. She bends over so she can look me in the eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t hear you.”

“I need your help!”, I yell. Whispering I say, “I’m stuck. Ok? I’m stuck.”

The brunette stands up. She throws the stick she just sharpened a while ago.

I look up at the rope and watch as the stick goes through the rope breaking it. There’s a quick falling sensation before I slam into the ground.

“Ow.”

(Yesterday)

September 9th, 5057

Running I jump over a fallen tree. A quick blow of wind blasts onto my smiling face as I run away from my pursuer. Behind me I can hear a childhood friend yell, “Clarke! Give that back!”

Although most would stop, I don’t. Laughing I speed up trying to get more distance between us. I shout over my shoulder, “come and get it!”

As I near the busy “streets” of the market area people begin to step out of my way. Everyone in this camp knows better than to get in my way, especially when I’m running. They had to learn that the hard way.

 _Poor Steve._

I run through the “streets” of the marketplace and to the no grass area which has become a soccer field on weekends and playground on weekdays.

I run in front of a kid about to kick the ball.

“Shoot!”, he shouts. Not wanting to kick the ball at me he kicks it away from me. The ball flies by my head and through the window of a house. The impact shatters the glass and shards fall to the ground.

Emerging from a tent a red faced, plump woman shouts, “Timothy!”

_Whoops._

I glance over my shoulder giving the kid an apologetic look. 

“Rawr!”, Raven leaps out in front of me. 

I come to a stop.

“Nowhere to run now”, she smirks at me. Taking a step forward she holds out her hand. “Hand it over.”

Instead of handing the object over I look for an escape. I stand in one of the few clearings in the camp. To my left are some shops and to my right are houses for people. Those houses are a mix of tents and huts. Though most prefer tents. 

I have to choose between running into a shop or tent. When I’ve made my decisions I say, “it ain’t over yet little bird”. Taking a right I start running towards a tent. The flap of the tent is already open when I run through the “door”. I dive behind a bed and wait for Raven to come into the tent. Knowing she’ll take her time to curse me out, I decide to take a few seconds to calm my breathing down.

A few seconds later I hear heavy panting coming from the flap of the tent.

“Clarke”, Raven pants. “Come out.”

I put my hand over my mouth and stay still. Looking at the tent wall in front of me I can see Raven’s shadow moving around as she walks. 

_Thank you to whoever lit that candle._

Nervously I watch her shadow and try to guess where she is based on the shadow. When I think Raven is far enough from the door I run out from behind the bed.

**Thud**

I land on my stomach. The air is leaving my body leaving me breathless for a second.

“Not”, I breathe out. “Cool.”

I twist under her until I’m lying on my back. Blue eyes meet brown eyes that are full of rage.

“You’re an ass”, she growls. 

I attempt to push her off but she grabs my arms and holds them above my head.

“Get off”, I mumble. 

I kick Raven off me. She lands on the post at the center of the tent. Raven groans but is up on her feet in a matter of seconds.

Standing up I take a small step to the right. Raven copies me by mirroring what I do. We do this little tango for a few minutes then Raven runs at me. I quickly move out of her way. Her stomach slams into the counter, the impact forcing air out of her lungs. 

A few things fall off the counter and onto the floor. The candle is among those things, it’s fire still going.

“Um . . . Raven.”

“You bitch”, Raven growls. 

Turning around I run out of the tent with Raven following. I’m a distance away from the tent when I’m tackled into the dirt by Raven. Raven reaches for the object that I hold out of her reach. We both roll in the dirt fighting over the object.

“Yeah, you like that?”, Raven pushes my face into the dirt. “You-”

A loud crack comes from the tent I was just in.

Raven’s hand disappeared from the back of my head. I can feel her climb off me. 

“What the hell”, I look around.

A few people have stopped walking and are looking for the source of the noise. A group of boys tease one another saying it’s the creatures attacking the fence. They get a good slap on the head from an adult man

I sit up and look at the tent. “It cam-”

**Crack**

The tent wobbles and sways before collapsing. A dirt cloud surrounds it for a few seconds before disappearing. 

I look at Raven who has lost all color in her face. 

_Shit._

Behind me everyone has stopped moving, the camp is dead silent except for people breathing.

_Just pretend to be shocked. Pretend to be shocked. Pre-_

“Clarke!”

“Mother”, I jump to my feet. 

Abby walks out of one of the medical tents. She comes to a stop with her arms crossed as she glares at me. “Is that the cause of this?”, she asks motioning towards the object in my hand. 

I hide the object behind my back.

Abby opens her mouth only to close it. She does this a few times then takes a deep breath. “Can you not destroy things for one day?”

I glance at Raven who has made some space between us. “It’s not that bad Mom”, I say.

As though this was some play with a script, the tent behind me lights on fire. I assume it’s growing into a bigger flame every second. The flame could reach as high as the clouds. I can feel the warmth of the flames as they lick at the back of my neck. The warmth serves as a reminder of the damage I just caused.

Growling Abby places her head in her hands.

“Oops”, I say pulling a face. 

The camp groans. They start fetching buckets to fill with water to put out the fire.

Lincoln, a Trikru who is now Skaikru, yells, “let’s work fast! Salvage what you can!”

The guards and guards in training respond with, “yes sir!”

I turn around and watch as the guards put the fire out. I would wish to help and try to fix what I caused but ever since I was young I would never assist in solving a problem I made.

_What was it my mom said?_

**_“The rich are rich for a reason. The poor are poor for a reason. You can’t have the rich without the poor. Just like you can’t have a loser without a winner. The one who fails should have to do the dirty work”._ **

_Right . . ._

When the fire is out the guards make sure to walk by me and glare. One of them, Nathan, mutters “future leader my ass. She’d be the reason we’d die in a war”.

One man nudges him. “She’d be the reason we are at war”.

Although I am used to the mean words that are passed around I find that the “future leader my ass” insult hurts more than usual. I’m not destined to be a leader but it’s assumed I would take my mom’s spot. You can’t be a leader if no one respects and hates you.

Reaching up I gently rub one arm with my hand to give myself something to focus on.

“I didn’t mean to”, I whisper knowing my mom is behind me.

Abby puts her arm around my shoulder. “I know honey but you gotta be more careful.”

“I try!”, I look at her. “I really do . . . bad things just happen to me.”

“Good things are on their way.”

I shrug her arm off me. “Villains don’t get a happy ending”, I turn and walk away.

**********

It’s been two hours since someone’s tent, which is their home, collapsed and lit on fire. Before the owner of the home could go in and dig through the ashes, the guards made sure there was no chance of it going up in flames again. 

_I don’t need to feel responsible for a death._

But now that the fire is gone and there’s a 99% chance of it not starting again, the family that once lived there has started going through the remains. The family seems to be made up of one old woman, two sons and a very young daughter. There’s also the mom who is currently pregnant.

I’ve seen the mom around a few times. We’ve talked . . . she said something about expecting twins. She appears to be in her mid 30’s maybe closer to 40.

The mom walks on top of the ashes or tries to since not everything has burned making the terrain rough and uneven. Every now and then she stumbles but never falls. She comes to a stop and looks at something I fail to see. Something others have also failed to see.

The woman bends over and picks up the object which turns out to be a picture. As soon as she takes a look at it tears start going down her face. She hugs the object with all she has.

_I feel like I’m going to throw up._

Feeling too sick to watch anymore I look away from the ashes. Instinctively I look beyond the fence. I’ll probably never know what is beyond those fences. That’s no big deal considering most in this camp will never find out. Yet most don’t want to find out. 

Beyond that stupid fence lies a world unknown to many inside this camp. A place hidden by the forest leaves, a place so beautiful and untouched by the ever destroying hands of my people . . . by me. That forest is the only place that I haven’t broken hearts in or burnt down tents or got someone killed due to my stupidity. Yet, it’s a place I can’t reach. It’s a tiny step away but that’s a step I can never take.

A few have seen beyond the fence, been inside the forest. Those who did leave were selected by my mom. Everyone takes pride when this happens but I know she chose them because she wouldn’t care for their death. Chances are she thought they were a weight on this camp and overall useless.

Despite me being a weight on the camp she would never let me go into the forest. I did manage to gather enough courage to ask about going out but I would get a straight out “no” before I could finish. Guess being the leader’s daughter doesn’t have as many advantages people think it does.

After me asking I would get a long drawn out story about how the forest hides all these creatures. These so-called “real” creatures patrol the forest and kill intruders. They are said to have misplaced limbs and will eat you whole. The stories are a bunch of nonsense made to scare the camp children.

_But I’m not a child._

From behind me my door creaks as someone opens it.

“Go away”, I mumble

“Dammit”, a familiar voice growls. “I was gonna scare you.”

I don’t respond to them. 

They laugh their very familiar cheerful laugh. “Can you see the creatures?”, she walks over and stands by me. “Can you see the limbs that lie upon their heads?”

I shake my head. “Course not”.

“Yeah, they only come out at night anyways.”

“The humans don’t look like that.”

“Clarke-”

“What?”, I look at her. “I’ve seen one Raven. They don’t have limbs on their heads or tails sticking out of their asses.”

“Have you been within five feet of one? Have you kissed one? Fucked it?”

“No . . .”

“Then how can you be so sure what they look like?”

“I . . . uh-”

“You see, many have reported seeing creatures at night. Big creatures.”

“But not the humans!”, I snap. “They say creatures not humans.”

“The creatures are the humans”.

“Raven, I have a strong feeling . . . and I saw the silhouette of one.”

Raven smiles. It’s her “I don’t want to hurt your feelings” smile.

“You probably think I’m mentally ill huh?”

Raven shakes her head.

I give her a look.

“Ok . . . a little.”

Turning my back to the window I lean against the window sill. Through the corner of my eye I can see Raven running a finger along the windowsill. She lifts her finger and looks at the dirt on her finger.

“Clarke”, she says.

“Hmm.”

“Do you . . . you do know dreams can be something of the present”, she looks at me. “Hence why they are called dreams. Just a creation of one’s wishes that aren’t logical or possible.”

“I’m being serious!”, I walk over to my bed. I flop onto the bed and land on my back. “I stay up late. I’ve seen glimpses of them.” Using my elbows as supports I sit up and look at Raven. 

“I wasn’t saying you weren’t serious”, she looks away. “I just don’t want you hurt, that’s all.”

“I know and I won’t be.”

“For now, just for a little while longer, can we just believe the lies?”

I stare at the ceiling. Raven’s innocent question swirls around in my head.

_Believe in lies, believe is such stupid lies._

In the distance, down the hall, I can hear the click of heels. They are quiet like a whisper but still noticeable.

“Fine”, I say. “But one day I will stop believing such lies. I won’t stay inside these stupid walls and let fear control me like everyone else.”

“Or maybe they use their brains”, she smiles. “So-”

“I still can’t believe he confessed.”

Raven gives me a look of confusion.

I bring my fingers to my lips and motion towards the door. A second later a maid walks into the room with an expensive dress draped over her arm.

I nod to my maid, “Margaret.”

“M’lady”, she frowns. “Someone of your standards does not lie on a bed like that.”

I sit up. “Sorry.”

“Legs closed”.

I bring my legs close to one another.

“Well, here is your wedding dress M'lady”, she drapes it over the back of a chair. 

“That looks expensive”, Raven comments.

“Silly”, Margaret giggles. “Someone as pure as Clarke deserves the best. It doesn’t matter the cost.”

_Pure._

I look at the dress. Margaret hasn’t realized it but she’s gripping the dress tightly. I know there will be a few wrinkles in that spot. 

“Yes, and everyone does enjoy wearing a wrinkled dress”, Raven mumbles.

Margaret notices her hand. She quickly lets the dress go and smooths it over. Without a word she turns to leave. “Oh yes”, she says. “I almost forgot.”

“Yes?”, Raven asks, giving me a glance.

“Clarke’s mother has requested to see her.”

Both Raven and I notice the way Margaret spits out the word “mother”. She says it like it’s venom in her mouth. 

“Now?”, I ask. 

“Sometime before the party but probably now.”

Getting out of bed I walk over to the dress. Running my hand down the silky fabric I say, “this isn’t a party Margaret. It’s simply a rehearsal.”

“Yes, you are right M’lady. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

I examine the expensive looking dress. It is a fancy looking dress, my mom called it the rehearsal dress but I am sure I will be wearing it at my wedding.

As I’m looking at the dress silence begins to fill the room. I don’t mind the silence and neither does Raven, to some extent, but Margaret hates silence. Something about it makes her sweaty, nervous and honestly quilty looking. 

Margaret coughs awkwardly. “Well, I better take my leave”, and just like that Margaret is gone.

Once the door closes Raven says, “well then”. She claps her hands, “shall we get you ready?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will be doing two updates a day. At what time? I don't know, whatever time I get home I guess. This story is complete (it's written out already so all things that happen are for sure and won't be changed) but I'm not willing to sit and update about 50 chapters in one sitting and I am writing the second book for this series already, though I may be taking a break to attempt to write a new fanfiction for a new fandom. I'm not sure if I like the characters quite yet. I love one of them but the other may be a challenge. Maybe I will wait on the new fandom until I get the comic for that tv show. I'm not sure yet. Anyways, I'm sure you guys get emails or something when I update. Don't worry, even though this thing says the story is one chapter long it isn't. When I put in the second chapter I'll change the amount of chapters to a question mark (?) so . . . yeah.  
> Only for today will I do four updates just because it is the beginning of this fanfiction.


	2. Chapter 2

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

To my right runs a silver female wolf. She runs by my side and sticks close. Her chocolate eyes take in the forest and the scenery instead of focusing on the task at hand. She really has to pay more attention during these times.

After thinking that I can practically hear the wilver wolf’s voice in my head right now.

_“Alexandria, you oughta appreciate what’s wrong you more.”_

I huff out a breath of annoyance. This gets Luna’s attention. She lets out a breathy half laugh as she nudges me with her shoulder.

I’m caught off guard by this simple action. 

_Can she no-_

I feel myself lose balance and although I try to get grip on the ground I fall over the log. Dirt fills my mouth when I hit the ground face first.

Luna comes to a stop. A low whimper comes from her as she gives me a quick sniff. With a nip on the ear she runs ahead of me.

_Ugh._

A playful bark from Luna tells me to catch up.

Getting up I start running. It only takes a second for me to catch up to the silver wolf. We stick to the same pace until we see the path leading to the cliff. Upon seeing the path Luna slows down to a walk while I slow to a trot. Sticking close to the path I sniff to my left then right to make sure we’re not in danger. In the air there’s a lingering scent of other clans.

 **_“They were on our territory”_ **, I growl.

Luna glances at me. **_“They were well onto our property”_ **.

I want to think the scent is the one of Nia’s people but they were here so long ago that it’s hard to tell. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was some Azgeda people. This cliff is highly wanted for a few reasons.

I come to a stop a few feet away from the edge of the cliff. This part of the cliff is warm from the sun shining on it. It makes a great sunning spot and has a great view. Very relaxing.

Luna walks over to me. **_“Learn to relax”_ ** , she quickly licks the side of my face before lying down. She lets her front paws dangle off the edge of the cliff. **_“Nice”_ **.

I look at Luna. She’s enjoying the silence and the sun. Her ears rotate as she picks up on the sounds of nature. I suppose I should let the silence settle between us. I could use this time to enjoy my surroundings, take Luna’s advice. 

_Ok, relax. I can relax._

Looking around I find a spot on the cliff. Using my claws I scratch at the floor a few times.

 **_“I said relax”_ ** , Luna glances at me. Her wolf nudges my paw. **_“Relax”_ **.

Ignoring her I listen to the silence. I let a calming feeling take over me but this feeling disappears when I catch the distant noise of the sky people getting up for the day. Hearing them spoils whatever peace I was having or was close to getting. 

Growling I can’t help but wish those people never fell from the sky. 

**_“Did I wrong the Gods or something?”_ **.

From the corner of my eye I see Luna has a weird smirk on. I’ve come to recognize that smirk that even in her wolf form.

My paws are beginning to ache so I turn into a human. I test my feet on the ground before listening to everything around me again. Luna shifts back. She rolls onto her back and looks up at the sky. 

“I do love the forest”, she whispers.

“Doesn’t everyone.”

Luna looks at me. “But?”

“But we really should start our day.”

“Is that not what we’re doing?”

“Believe it or not-”

“Probably not.”

“A morning run is not starting your day. Starting your day is-”

“I know, I know”, she rolls her eyes. “Starting to get your duties done is when your day truly starts.”

“We-”, I cut myself off. 

There’s a strange sound that comes from the sky people. Whatever happened has the birds flying off and away from the camp.

Jumping to her feet Luna looks around. Her relaxed mood is gone and she is now on alert. “The hell was that?”.

“Your guess is as good as mine”. Stepping away from the cliff I keep my eyes in the direction of the sky people camp. “They’re probably doing something dumb.”

Luna nods. She begins to relax and to help her she shakes out her arms. “I never know what they are…”, she trails. Her jaw drops open.

In the distance a black cloud of smoke comes from the camp. It begins to fill the sky in their area.

“Idiots”, Luna mumbles.

I smile at her. “emo don the eltu gon a goufa”.

Luna smiles. I know she’s trying to hold back her laugh but some of it escapes. “That’s”, Luna says. She brings her hand to her mouth to quiet the laughs. “Not very nice Lexa.”

I nod and run my hands over my arms hoping to calm myself down. When I feel my heart rate going down, I look back to the black cloud in the sky. “Let’s go back to camp… I don’t like this sight”.

Luna and I start heading towards the camp. We walk in silence. I know Luna is thinking about what was on fire and why. I don’t really care for it since there’s no real threat when the sun is out. 

As we walk I watch everything closely. I try to notice every movement around us. Most of them are non-threatening, like rabbits or deer. Sometimes it’ll be mice scurrying out of their den.

“Should I bring something back?”

Luna mumbles something I can’t hear. She’s too lost in thought to engage in a conversation.

Reaching under my shirt I pull out a knife. I look around then throw the knife at a bush. When the knife disappears into the bush there’s a quick squeak and something hits the floor. 

I’m about to head for the dead animal when I hear people walking in the distance. I put my hand up making Luna come to a stop. She looks around.

“Raun hir”, a voice whispers in the distance.

“Daily patrol”, I whisper and put my hand down. I start walking again and leave the kill in the bush. I figure that the daily patrol will find it. If not then I can scold them later.

“Heda”, Indra approaches me. She nods to me.

I nod back. “Did anything happen?”

“Not here, no”, Indra glances at Luna. “But I believe something is on fire towards the Skaikru camp. Do you wish to have people check it out?”

“That won’t be necessary”, Luna answers for me

Indra gives Luna a rude look. “Heda”, she looks at me. “Do you wish to have people check it out?”

“As Luna said, that won’t be necessary.”

I can see Luna giving Indra a look that says, “told you so”. The look makes Indra clench her fists as she glares at Luna. 

_Last thing I need is an argument between these two idiots._

“Luna, shouldn’t you be helping with training?”

Luna understands that I’m telling her to leave without actually saying it. “Oh yeah”, she says. “I’ll be off”. She turns into a wolf and runs towards the training grounds.

Two new guards walk over to me with my “armor”. I can tell they’re nervous, especially the little one.

“Dude, act cool”, the bigger one says. He puffs out his chest.

“I… I… I am”, the youngest spits out.

Taking the armor I start putting it on. As I put it on I notice Indra hasn’t left.

“What is it you wish to say Indra?”

She hesitates. “Uh… Costia is waiting for you in your tent. Says it is important.”

Freezing I look down at my armor. 

_Costia._

“Just what I need”, I mumble.

_I thought I ended things with that redhead._

I shrug the feeling away and finish putting on my ‘armor’. “Right”, I say. “I’ll go handle her. No reason for guards to come along.”

“Are you sure Heda?”

“Yes”, I start making my way towards my tent. “Costia is nothing more than another villager here. No reason to raise concern.”

Indra nods. She stays where she is and watches me until she no longer can.

I disappear into my tent. When I walk in the first thing I notice is a redhead lying on my bed. Costia has made herself at home as she looks relaxed and comfortable.

“Lexa”. She doesn’t say it as a greeting or out of respect.

I walk over to a table where a cup of warm tea sits. I’m about to pick it up when I spot a lipstick stain on the side. 

_Another cup to discard. And this was my favorite one..._

“Costia”, I turn away from the table and lean against it. “May I ask what brings you here?”

“Is a woman not allowed to check up on her Heda?”

“ _Her_ Heda?”

“My Hodnes”.

_Hodnes._

I test the word on my tongue. “Hodnes”. “Is that what I am?”

“You didn’t know?”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I get mixed up with all the things you’ve referred to me as. Let’s see, there’s Hodnes, asshole, soulmate, mate, jerk, cu-”

“That’s enough.”

“Oh and to answer your question one is allowed to call someone a Hodnes but it should be someone who truly loves you back. I do not”. I finally look at Costia. “Also something tells me this is not a simple checkup. So I ask again, what brings you here?”

“Oh you know-”

“Get to the point”.

All the playfulness leaves Costia’s eyes. She takes a look around the tent before saying, “you’ve been avoiding me. Why?”

Tossing my head I laugh at her stupidity. “You amuse me”.

“I’m serious”.

“That’s a first”. When I smile at her her hands clutch her pants. “And here I was thinking Skaikru was dumb.”

“Chit?!”

“Costia, I’ve been busy. There’s a difference between avoiding and doing work.”

“If you’re so busy then how do you manage a morning run?”

“That was a patrol”.

Costia climbs off the bed. “Yet you bring back no food.”

I don’t respond to this. I have no intention to and don’t have to. Pushing away from the table I start walking towards Costia. “Why do you keep seeking me out?”

“You know why”. Costia tries to take a step back only to hit the edge of the bed. She takes a seat on the edge.

“Do I?”, I take a step forward.

Scooting back on the bed she nods. “You should.”

“Yet I don’t”.

I get on the bed and start crawling towards Costia at a slow pace. Everytime I come close Cstia scoots back to get away from me.

_Now who is the one avoiding?_

“Is it because you seek sex?”

Costia shrugs.

“Love?”

Another shrug. She attempts to scoot back only to realize the edge is too close.

Reaching out I put my hand on my chest. I move it down to her chest. As I move my hand along her chest I watch Costia’s reactions. She’s biting her bottom lip waiting for something to happen. Applying pressure I push her down until she’s lying on her back. 

Looking up at me Costia makes a small whimper. She has a look of uncertainty on her face.

“Or something else?”.

I look down at the red head and take this time to take in her facial features. She has gorgeous eyes. She has the type of eyes people dream of having. Her hair is a gorgeous red, the color of blood.

“Hmm”, I lean down. Lightly brushing my lips over her neck I move up towards her ear. “You’re heating up”, I whisper. Blowing on her ear I smile when she shivers.

“Lexa”.

“You’re nervous”. When I get no answer I deliver a quick nip to her.

Yelping in pain Costia squirms underneath me.

Looking at her ear I watch as blood runs down her ear. “But you are not my hodnes”.

“But-”

“You were a one night stand. My wolf was confused”, I lean closer so she hears this next part clearly. “Now leave my tent.”

**********

I walk out of my tent holding a pair of sandals. Costia left her shoes here as she didn’t have time to put them on when she was dragged out of my tent by the guards.

Holding out the shoes I turn to a guard. “Deliver this to Costia.”

The guard looks at the shoes then back at me. With a small nod he takes the shoes. He holds them at a distance as a look of displeasure sits on his face. Groaning her rolls his neck. “Sha Heda.”

I watch as he walks away. When I can no longer see him I turn to face the other guard. When I do his smile quickly disappears. “Mac.”

“Heda”, he coughs.

“I am going to take a walk in the forest. No reason to follow.”

He nods.

I walk away from Mac. “And I saw that smile”, I look over my shoulder. Mac now has a blush on his face. I smile at him so he knows he isn’t in any trouble.

Mac looks away, his face turning bright red.

**_“Out”. My wolf growls at me. She paces back and forth._ **

_As you wish._

The familiar pain of shifting takes over my body. Once fully turned I shake out my fur. All at once the nightly smell swarms around me. At first my nose feels stuffy but it goes away in a few seconds.

Taking a quick sniff of the air I head into the forest. I can faintly smell the scent of the people from the night patrol. Knowing I’m not alone in the forest brings a feeling of safety but also disgust. I like being alone at night.

Now that my wolf is out and roaming it calls out to something. It seeks something. Something that it’s been searching for for the past year. Something we’ve been searching for together. I know that whatever this thing is my wolf really wants it and I’m curious as to what it is. Maybe it’ll help in some way.

As I’m walking I stick to the edge of the path. I know Mac and a few guards can still see me so I do this to make them think I’m heading to the stream. When I’m sure they are no longer able to see me I stray away from the path.

I trust my wolf to lead me to the same place we’ve gone every night. She knows where she is going. When I first let the wolf roam it ran straight to this place, the excitement it felt was overbearing that I had to change back. We came back the next night and my wolf was just as excited. She didn’t find what she was searching for but the next night she was just as excited as we came back. Now it’s tradition.

Since we haven’t found what we are looking for my wolf has become less desperate. Her excitement is still there but not as obvious. She’ll lead me to the usual spot knowing it won’t find what it wishes to find.

_Pointless._

As I walk I can hear Luna giving me a long lecture as to why going to the Skaikru camp alone is just dumb and stupid. I know my reason to do this would be “I’m watching them closely”. That reasoning is the only reason I feel fine doing this most nights. If I were to say “my wolf wanted it” then she would freak. She would jump to conclusions and not leave me alone.

Continuing on my walk I come across many animals that I could kill but I have no interest in them. That and I’m not hungry. A few of the rodents scatter when I get near them but deer don’t move. In fact they don’t bother looking at me. They seem to realize I am no threat to them at the current moment, such smart yet dumb creatures.

When I get closer to my destination the Skaikru fence becomes visible. Upon seeing it my wolf gets nervous, we both do. It’s like we know nothing will come of this trip but yet we hope something will happen. 

I turn into a human and approach the fence. I come to a spot where the forest ends since I don’t want to be seen. I don’t know what would happen if they saw me. 

**_“In there” My wolf whispers. It goes from sitting to standing. “There, there!”, it howls._ **

I push my wolf down into hiding so I can think. From here I can see one big tent lit up by lights. I assume the Sky People are celebrating some party.

_How dumb are these people?_

With a huff I begin to walk along the edge of the fence to get closer to the party area. The lights are really bright and a little blinding, however, they don’t prevent me from seeing the people inside. One girl, who I’ve seen quite a bit, is walking around with a man. She doesn’t appear happy but most Sky People aren’t.

The few people that talk have a cup with red liquid in it. I’ve seen that liquid a few times, those who drink it end up tipsy and act weird. Luna said they drink it in celebration of something.

_But what are they celebrating?_

I look away from the blinding lights and towards the only tall building in the Skaikru camp. It’s a weird shape for a building but I’ve always assumed they built it like that for a reason. I find a certain window where there’s usually a sad looking girl looking out that window but tonight she isn’t.

From past nights I could see she wanted out of the camp. I can’t blame her, I would want out too.

Deep down I can feel my wolf growling. It’s restless and angry. She wants to see the girl.

I look back towards the party before turning away from the camp. I start walking back to the camp. As I walk I realize this trip has made me realize one thing.

Skaikru is still as stupid as they were on the day they fell from the sky.

Translation:

emo don the eltu gon a goufa - these people have the brains of a child

Raun hir - Around here

Heda - Commander

Hodnes - love

Chit - what

Sha Heda - Yes Commander

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not wish to confuse anyone but most of the time people, in this story, will refer to their wolves as a different being. They do this even when in wolf form. They are in control but it’s like a different being is at the same time.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for a few upcoming chapters the POV changes may take place an hour or two before what happened during someone’s POV. Ex:
> 
> *******  
> (Clarke’s POV)  
> Lexa.  
> My wolf walks in helpless circles as it tries to seek out another wolf. One wolf. Lexa’s wolf.  
> I can’t feel any connection. This feeling scares me, I need to find her. I have to find her.  
> Walking over logs and rocks I force myself to keep going. Not for my sake but for Lexa’s and my wolf’s sake.  
> “Clarke!”, a familiar voice yells.  
> Ignoring the pain in my leg I start running. “Lexa!”
> 
> ********  
> (Lexa’s POV)  
> “Clarke!”, I call out. “Clarke!”  
> Where did that blonde go? Please be safe, please be safe.  
> Bursting into a forest clearing I come to a stop. “Clarke?”, I whisper.  
> “Lexa!”  
> Turning around I watch as the blonde runs down a hill and into the clearing.  
> “Lexa”, she runs into my arms, her arms wrapping around me

********

(Clarke’s POV)

With each step I take, my feet scream out in pain. The high heels I’m wearing are too tight for comfort but, as mom said, “they look so pretty with that dress”. I knew better than to fight her against it so I decided to just deal with it. The better I am, the faster this seems to go by. 

I have to take my attention away from the constant ache so I can taste a few of the dishes around here. I’m supposed to be tasting the healthy ones but I sneak a few unhealthy ones every now and then. Well not sneak, hard to sneak things when everyone’s eyes seem to be on you.

Coming to a stop I look at a dish. There’s octopus tentacles that are still moving. 

_The fuck…_

I move away from that dish not even bothering to taste it.

From the corner of my eye I watch a woman wobble over to us. “I”, she hiccups. “Am so excited to see you two get married”, she says in a high pitched voice.

I smile at the woman but don’t respond. Although the words were directed at me, she’s looking at Wells.

Wells places a hand on the center of my back. “Thank you Maria”.

“Oh, enough with the formal garbage”, the woman, Maria, takes a sip from her wine glass. “We’ve known each other since birth.”

“Since birth”, I say. “That’s a long time.”

“Yes”, Maria looks at me. “Yes, it is. We were so close that everyone thought we would be-”

“Maria”, Wells gives her some look. 

I flash a smile at Wells. “No, I wanna hear this”. 

_This should be good._

“No, you rea-”

“He left me for you”, Maria slurs. “We were so close. Best friends since death”. She looks at Wells. “Isn’t that right Wells?”

“We were kids when we made-”

“That doesn’t change a thing!”

Her shouting causes people to look at us. A guard notices and walks over to us. “Is there a problem?”

Maria clicks her tongue. “Not at all…”

The guard looks at me for confirmation. I give him a tiny nod and he walks off.

“Well look at the time”. With that Maria walks away.

I look over my shoulder to watch Maria walk away. She stumbles a few times as she walks towards the beverages to get more wine.

“Hasn’t she had enough?”, I whisper to myself.

“You’ll have to pay no mind to Maria”, Wells says. “She can be the jealous type.”

“Oh Wells”, I say. “Innocent and naive Wells”. I reach up and give his cheek a few soft pats before moving onto the next dish.

“What’s that mean?”, Wells follows behind me.

I pop a tiny piece of steak into my mouth. “You really didn’t see it?”, I hand the rest of that dish off to Wells.

“Mmm, no”, Wells bites into the steak. He sets the steak onto a table.

“Maria was more mad at you than she was me.”

“That’s not-”

Holding up my finger I cut Wells off. “This is not an argument.”

Wells opens his mouth only to shut it. He nods.

I pick up a dessert looking thing, take a bite and offer it to Wells. He shakes his head so I look around for the two Salukis that walk around this tent. Not able to find them I toss the dessert into a nearby trash can.

At some point I come across a chicken leg that looks delicious but is too much for me. I take two bites, savoring the taste as I do. Now that I am done with the chicken leg, I whistle calling for the two Salukis.

A table towards the front of the tent wiggles making a few people concerned. One of those people is Abby. She groans and lifts up the cloth of the table. At once Bau and Bruno tumble out from under the table, both fighting over a bone. 

“Bau”, I call.

The two salukis come running over to me. I toss the chicken leg to one of them and move on to leave them to their own fighting.

Behind me Wells sneezes. He mutters something as he wipes his nose.

“Allergic to dogs?”

Wells nods. “Yeah.”

I take a bite out of another dessert only to spit it out a second later. “What a shame”, I move on from that table.

As I’m moving on I note Wells is no longer following. I turn to face a table and through the corner of my eye I can see Wells looking at the snack I discarded. He looks at the dessert in which I took it from. His eyes run over it before he decides to catch up with me.

“My love”, he says.

Those two words send a sickening feeling through me. I have to hide the way I cringe. “Hmm”, I hum.

“May I ask why you are tasting the dishes?”

“Gotta waste time somehow.”

“We could talk.”

_Talk._

I eye the dessert in front of me. I will try to decide whether I want the dessert at my wedding tomorrow or not. But then again, what do I care about that shit party tomorrow?

“About what?”, I turn and face Wells. 

“Eachother”, excitement fills Well’s eyes. “I only know the you from space not from Earth.”

I put on a fake smile. “Let’s keep it that way. Someone has to see me in a good way.”

“A lot more people like you than you think.”

Not wanting to argue I nod. I look back at the desserts only to realize I no longer have an appetite. I move away from the tables that hold the many dishes and make my way to my seat. “Wells”, I take a seat.

Wells sits by me. He looks at me with an expecting look.

“How excited are you to be married?”, I whisper. “Like honestly.”

Wells opens his mouth to answer immediately but I stop him.

“Don’t answer right now”, I look at Wells. “Think it over.”

“But I know my answer.”

“I’m not doubting that”, I whisper. I look at the table. Putting my hand on the table I start tracing the lines on the table. “But you think you have an answer. You’re currently full of excitement because of your big day.

After tomorrow that feeling will be gone then you can answer truly. So please, don’t answer right now.”

Wells nods. 

Sighing I look up from the table and towards the forest. I begin to question what I am thinking. People don’t just leave the fence or run away. Will me leaving be selfish? Whose heart must I break to heal my own?

I look back at Wells.

I do wish I could stay and live a happy life with him. It’s very obvious he has some liking towards me, his wolf has some liking towards mine. Yet my wolf dislikes him and his wolf very much. That is why I can’t stay, I have to find that person that my wolf loves and that I too love.

“You ok?”, Wells asks.

“Just thinking.”

The unknowing man smiles at me, his smile full of love. I smile back not wanting to raise concern.

_I wish I could be there to hear your answer._

**********

**My wolf paces back and forth. With each step it takes with its heavy paws, the ground shakes. The thin sheet water that covers ground wiggles with each movement. My wolf fails to notice this as she paces.**

**She paces in front of something only she can see, she wants to move further but she doesn’t. It’s as though she’s reclined to a certain area and she wants out.**

**Now.**

**Coming to a sudden stop she stares at something. In the darkness something moves around. It sniffs at the water then looks in our direction. Something about this… creature has my wolf in a trance.**

**The creature comes closer and closer. It’s obvious it’s curious about us. It comes to a stop a few feet away from my wolf. The creature is a misty silhouette of a wolf. It’s eyes are darker than the night itself yet they show so much emotion. It seems like it wants to get closer but it can’t. My wolf won’t let it.**

**I feel as though I need to go to the wolf. Like they have something for me. As though that’s the thing that is having me wanting to leave this hellhole of a place.**

**The wolf takes a step towards us but my wolf turns away. It no longer cares for the intruder. With it’s back to the intruder it blocks everything out. From noise to feelings.**

**When we turn back around the creature is gone. It’s as though it was never there.**

September 10th, 5057

Today, on my birthday, I woke up early. I had to wake this early if I wanted to get things done. Also to avoid the fate that has been decided for me.

This decision I am about to make has been in the making for years but after last

night's… dream I had to leave. I had to find what my wolf longs for yet she refused to face it. There’s something about that creature and I need to find out more.

From inside I can feel my wolf growling. 

**_“Stay home”, my wolf growls. “Home.”_ **

**Ignorant bitch.**

Sitting up I look towards the window. The sky is just beginning to get light but the sun is still hidden. I planned on leaving earlier but didn’t wake up. This time works too.

I climb out of bed and put on my shoes. Moving silently I walk over to my bedroom door. I eye the hinges on the door before slowly opening the door. It creaks a few times as I open it but not as much as usual.

I step out into the hall and take a look around to make sure no one is around. I can’t see anyone but in the distance I hear Margaret humming as she cleans.

_She’s no threat, never will be._

I start walking down the hall. I walk the way that leads me away from my parents room. Last thing I need is to be caught by Abby.

I’m walking down the stairs when I hear, “m’lady, what are you doing up at this hour?”. I freeze where I am.

_Well shit._

Laughing nervously I slowly face Margaret. “I… I was just going to get some fresh air.”

Margaret eyes me. “If m’lady says so… well you be safe”, she starts sweeping and humming. This time her humming isn’t as cheerful.

Sighing a breath of relief, I start walking down the stairs again. From behind me Margaret says, “M’lady, the forest can be a very dangerous place.”

I turn around to look at Margaret but there’s no one there. Not even a sign she was there. I look around for her but she’s nowhere to be seen. I decide to forget about that. I leave the building and look around. To my right a guard is asleep and the other guard is nowhere to be seen.

I carefully walk past the sleeping guard and over to the fence. I touch the fence a few spots trying to find its weak spot. One stop doesn’t feel as sturdy as the other parts. Smiling, I start kicking the fence at the bottom. As I kick it the fence wiggles back and forth but makes no noise.

With a few more kicks the bottom of the fence pops out from the ground allowing me a way out.

**_“Bad idea”, my wolf growls. She does her usual pacing. “Go back, go back!”_ **

**Shut it!**

With a frustrated howl my wolf plops herself onto the water covered ground. She turns her back to me and just like that she’s gone. 

**Oh so you’re gonna go hide. Fine!**

Smoothing my shirt down I get on my stomach and crawl under the fence. As soon as I’m out of camp I can feel the difference. The ground is a lot more moist in the forest than it is in camp.

I stand up and brush myself off. A few dirt smudges remain on my clothes but I’m sure they’ll come off. I look around the new place, the place I would only imagine. It’s so pretty in here.

I take a deep breath of the forest air. My muscles relax as I breathe. “I did it”, I whisper. “I did it.”

I want to do a happy dance or something but I know better.

_Maybe when I’m away from camp._

I’m about to walk into the forest when I hear a twig snap to my right. I look in that direction hoping it’s some deer or raccoon or something. I can see something moved but I’m not sure what it was. I take a quiet step towards it but stop when I hear something coming from inside the camp. 

There’s a noise that sounds like someone yawning. I look towards the camp. The sleeping guard is now awake. He sits on the ground rubbing his eyes.

I know when his eyes are clear he will spot me so I move behind a tree to hide from him. I look up at the sky. It is a lot lighter than it was a few minutes ago. Pretty soon the sun will rise and I can’t be here when it does.

I shake out my arms and start walking into the forest. At first I stick to the path but at some point I have to move away from it. I feel if I stay close to it then it will be easier for people to find me.

The further I get away from the path, the more animals I see. The animals range from frogs to rabbits to deer. I’ve seen a few mice but those aren’t creatures I want to see. They’re disgusting.

I stop where I am when a mother deer walks out from behind a tree. She looks at me, her eyes wide but soon she seems to relax. She walks towards me with her neck extended. Her breath is hot as she sniffs my arm.

I want to touch the deer but I’m frozen stiff. Not from fear but from awe of this beautiful creature. 

When the deer has sniffed me enough, she huffs and turns away. She walks over to a bush and starts eating it. As soon as she does start eating, two baby deer run out from a tree and towards the deer. The mom pays them no mind as they play with one another. They run around her legs and around trees. 

This scene brings a smile to my face. I start walking again. The deer thing has me wishing I will see more animals and get to see their beauty. However, I know it’s silly, I do not want to see those creatures. The ones with weird limbs that come out of their asses. I’ll be more than happy to avoid them.

**_“Camp safe, in camp no worry about this”, my wolf grumbles._ **

**Shut it!**

*********

I’m not sure how long I have been walking. I know it’s been a while since the sun decided to rise and light up the sky. I assume I’ve been walking for at least an hour or two. With this knowledge I decide to take a break by a tree.

I lean against a tree and glance at my watch. I know looking at it is pointless since it hasn’t worked for years but it’s comforting for some reason. I never figured out why.

I’m beginning to relax when something falls from a tree. It falls into a bush sending a mouse running out from it.

_Mice are everywhere._

I look up at the tree that it fell from then at the bush. I note there is no wind so that can’t be the cause of the thing falling. Maybe there’s some animal hanging up in the tree or it could’ve been gravity. 

Since I have nothing better to do I decide to check it out. I push away from the tree and walk over to the bush. Before touching the bush I look at the leaves. They don’t appear to be the leaves of any poisonous plants. I take a step toward the bush, I’m about to look into it when something grabs my leg. Before I can react I’m pulled into the air by the foot.

“Ah!”, I shriek at the sudden movement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bolded text was Clarke dreaming.


	4. Chapter 4

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

_Ugh_

“The hell”, I groan. I roll over and push my face into the closest pillow to me. Moving my head brings a wave of headaches. They crash against my skull like waves.

Giving up on sleep I sit up and bring my hand to my head. 

_It hurts. What did I do last night?_

My question is answered by a gentle snore that isn’t mine. My first thought is my stomach but knowing my stomach doesn’t snore it can only be one thing. One person.

I look to my right where a mess of red hair covers the face of a sleeping Costia. She snores again this time sucking in some hair. Looking away from her hair I look at her neck checking for any new marks.

Nothing.

Further down I notice she has no shirt on. Her breasts are out in the open meaning one thing.

“Oh God”, I look at the floor. Lying on the floor is a mix of both Costia’s and my clothes. 

_Way to go Alexandria._

I get out of bed and stumble over to the table. Grabbing the cold cup of tea I notice the rim is dyed red from Costia’s lipstik. That little spawn of Satan.

“Screw it”, I chug down the cold tea.

_I’ve tasted shit better than this._

With the bad taste doing little to wake me up I slap myself on the cheeks hoping to finish waking myself up. Doing it hard enough it wakes my wolf up. A jolt of energy shoots through me as she looks around panicked.

With this newfound energy I start the day by cleaning up my tent. I pick up my clothes and throw them into a pile of dirty clothes knowing the laundry lady should come today. Then I pick up Costia’s clothes and set them on my side of the bed. I take time to fold them hoping it’ll trick her into thinking they are clean. She’ll never leave my tent if she thought her clothes were dirty.

Looking around I grab a piece of paper off the nightstand. I scribble down a quick note for Costia.

**“Stop bringing your personal cups into my tent then leaving them around.**

**Ps: this is over :p”**

I place the note on Costia’s clothes. With that I go into my closet, pick out clothes I can move around in and get dressed. Using the back entrance in my closet I sneak out of the tent away from the eyes of anyone.

With silent feet I step outside into the chilly Autumn night. There’s a small breeze that rustles the leaves of the trees. It makes the tip of my nose cold.

Although this is nothing to worry about I am worried about what things would roam in the forest around this time. Of course I have never seen said things but there are a few rumors. Rumors that have been around since I was young. But at this time most of the creatures should be going back into hiding but some stay out longer. Or so I heard.

Fluffing out my hair I shift into a wolf. Trusting my wolf I let her take the lead so I can ride in the backseat. As she walks she’s on alert as she heads to the Skaikru border again. I pray we don’t get caught by someone. Especially by our pack.

I take control when I come across a faint smell of the Trikru night patrol. I sniff at the ground coming to the conclusion that they were just here.

_Why were they heading towards the border?_

I follow their scent. Their scent takes a sudden sharp right like something spooked them. They kept walking off and farther away from the Skaikru camp. I’m glad they are not at the Skaikru border. I got this feeling they won’t be coming near the border for some time.

With a mind full of hope, and doubt, I approach the fence. The strong smell of alcohol doesn’t faze me. There is another strong smell that makes me dry heave. It reeks of rotting food.

_These people truly are disgusting._

I move away from my usual spot to escape the horrible smell. I find a new spot a few feet away from the camp exit. I don’t like being this close to their camp exit/entrance but this will have to do for now.

Double checking my surroundings I confirm I am safe where I sit. I shift back into a human and watch the Skaikru camp. I see nothing exciting, just the occasional owl or rodent since it’s too early for most of the forest animals to roam. Or in some cases too late.

I move over to a log and take a seat. Shifting on a log I try to find the most comfortable spot. It’s hard when the log is full of maggots and covered in moss.

**********

I’ve gone from sitting on the log to lying down. I keep one eye on the Sky Camp and the other on my surroundings. I have noticed that I’ve been here long enough that the sky is just beginning to light up. In a bit I will head back to camp to officially start my day but I will do that when the glowing sky ball makes an appearance. 

Sitting up I notice a fig tree. There’s plenty of fruit on the tree but a few have fallen. Since I haven’t had breakfast I decide to taste a fig and maybe eat some of it. I’ve never taken a liking to figs but food is food. 

I’m reaching for a fallen fig when there’s a sound in the distance. It stops then comes again. Forgetting about the fig I move towards the source of the noise. As I get closer I move into the shadows so the person or thing doesn’t see me. 

I see the cause of this noise. A person.

I’m too far to see general features but I can see their outline. I take a step towards the person. They’re kicking at a fence. They seem really determined to kick at this fence.

_Are they mad? That is a weird way to release anger._

It takes a few more kicks before the fence pops out from the ground. The person stops kicking and looks at the ground. They waste no time to crawl under the fence to go into the forest.

_They were leaving?_

I look behind me where the camp exit is. 

_It would have been easier to use that. I see them leave through it al- unless…_

I look back at the person.

_They’re not supposed to be out here._

I take a step into the shadows to remain hidden. I don’t leave the person to their own devices, instead I watch them. I’m guessing I was correct about not supposed to be out here since this person is looking around at the forest in awe. They have a big smile on their face. It’s a smile an excited child would have. 

I take a step forward hoping to see them more clearly. I forgot to move quietly and accidentally step on a twig. The twig breaks making a noise as it does. This noise catches the stranger’s attention.

I hope the person doesn’t see me but not wanting to risk it, I move behind a tree. I crouch down and crawl towards a bush so I can look through the leaves.

With the person’s curiosity getting the best of them, they come closer to me. With them closer I can see their face. I’m shocked to see it’s a female. She has blonde hair and ocean blue eyes. 

Based on her clothes I can tell she’s someone important in the Sky camp. She also has better looking hair than the other people, well fed.

This blonde moves closer only to come to a stop. 

There’s something coming from the camp. It’s a noise, someone is making it. I assume that this person is more a threat to the blonde than me. 

The girl seems to hear the noise. She looks at the camp then hides behind a tree.

I wait for the girl to come out and head back into the camp but she doesn’t. She waits a few seconds behind a tree before coming out hiding. Instead of going into camp she heads deeper into the forest. 

_What is she doing?_

Staying on all fours, I follow the girl as she makes her way through the forest. Making sure I use the forest to hide me I take long but slow steps as I follow her.

I expect the girl to have a loud walk since she’s never been in the forest. However, she has a quiet walk even though she’s obviously walking around carelessly. I question if the girl is aware of that gift she has. The more I think about, the more jealous I get. I had to learn to walk silently.

I come to a stop when the girl does. She’s stiff as a doe approaches her. The doe sniffs her arm for a few seconds before turning away to start eating. 

Much to my surprise the girl doesn’t kill the deer, like most Skaikru people do, instead she stares at it. She stares with some form of awe and questioning. As she watches the deer she notices two fawns run out from behind a tree. They start playing with one another. 

The girl smiles and starts walking again.

I’ve never seen a Skairku not kill something that moves. Crouching I play the scene over in my head a couple of times. 

_This girl… she’s different._

**********

It’s been about an hour since I started following the Sky girl. Since she came across the deer she hasn’t stopped once. Well she stopped for a second to check her shoe then she would continue walking. I wonder where she is going and if she is aware that she is getting close to my pack’s territory. I assume she has no idea.

The constant walking is taking an effect on her. Her walking has slowed, her steps are quieter than before and she seems more alert. Her body looks tense and she looks fearful in a way.

_What is she afraid of?_

The girl comes to a stop. Instead of taking off one shoe and shaking it like she’s done before, she leans against a tree. 

_Finally taking a break?_

**_“Approach”, my wolf growls._ **

**Fuck off.**

Knowing she’ll rest for some time I quickly climb up the nearest tree. I find a spot where I can see her but she can’t see me. Once that spot is found I begin to lie down. A small twig falls off the branch and into a bush under me. 

_Shit._

I look at the girl praying she didn’t notice but she did. 

I grab onto the branch and crouch down. As the girl moves closer I reach for my knife with one hand. She doesn’t stop walking towards me. I prepare myself to jump down when something to my left moves.

_A rope?_

I follow where the rope goes. It travels down the tree and ends with a loop that lies on the ground.

The rope suddenly straightens and tightens up. I jump away from the sudden motion.

From below me the girl lets out a sharp scream. I look down to see why she’s screaming. The girl hangs by a foot from the rope.

_A trap._


	5. Chapter 5

I stare at the trap for a few seconds before putting my knife away. Watching the girl wiggle and struggle to get out of the trap brings a smile on my face. Also some satisfaction. I didn’t think I would live to ever see someone get caught by their own trap.

Taking a seat on the branch I wonder when the girl will stop struggling and set herself free. Surely she brought a knife or something.

The minutes begin to tick by. The more minutes that pass the more I think she didn’t bring a weapon. If she didn’t bring anything then she has nothing to cut herself loose.

_ If she really is weaponless then she’s safe to approach. _

**_My wolf perks up._ **

**Yeah, we’re finally doing what you want.**

I jump off the branch and land silently on the ground. Walking around the tree I come to a stop in front of the girl. At first a look of fear comes onto her face but soon she looks confused.

She tilts her head up so she can look at me. “What the…”, she reaches out to touch me.

I swat her hand away only to grab it. I eye her hand finding it’s no different from mine. I expected the Sky freaks to have more or less fingers than us.

I begin to walk around the girl to get in more details about her. I grab her shirt and feel the fabric. Feels like some of the clothes back at home. When I drop her shirt I get a glimpse of her bra.

_ She’s more of a woman than a girl… _

Stopping in front of the woman, I crouch down.

Her face seems to have the same things my people’s faces have. A nose, two eyes, eyebrows, a mouth. She even has ears.

“You”, I say. “Are not some ugly creature.”

The woman stares at me. She has a look of shock that was brought on by my recent comment. The woman makes a strange pig like noise.

_ She ok? _

“So…”, the woman wiggles again. Doing this makes her start spinning in a slow circle.

I stand up and take tiny steps to the right so I remain in front of the woman.

“You gonna help or what?”. Her blue eyes look up at me. Her face turns a bright red and she looks away. “You’re a forest person right?”, she coughs.

“What do you know about me?”

“Oh, I don’t know anything about you. Haven’t seen  _ you _ before but I have heard things about your kind.”

“My kind?”

“I should say people”, she wiggles again. Her blue eyes find my eyes, “they say you guys are ruthless. Rude.”

I consider her words for a few seconds.

_ Ruthless… rude? _

“Why leave your camp?”

The woman smiles. “Ah, so you speak fluent english?”

Growling I repeat, “why leave your camp?”

“Oh you know”, she shrugs. “I could ask why you left yours?”

I scoff at her words. Taking a few steps away from the blonde I say, “you stupid.”

She shrugs again. “I’ve heard that before.”

“Ignorant”, I move over to a tree and pick up a twig. “Go into the forest unprepared… you’re like a child.”

“Now that was rude”, she sighs.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

My body spins in a slow circle as I hang upside down, a rope wrapped around my ankle being the only reason I haven’t fallen yet. My arms sway slightly from side to side as I spin. The idea of trying to escape seems like a foreign idea to me. 

A few trees away from me a stranger’s voice directed at me says, “need my assistance now?”

The stranger, a brunette, has asked that every few minutes ever since I said, “go away. I don’t need your help.”

Lifting my head I manage to look over my shoulder. The forest eyed brunette is leaning against a tree. She uses a knife to sharpen a stick she found on the ground.

_ She's gonna kill me… _

Dropping my head I start wiggling in hopes I can get my body to face the brunette. “I”, I grunt. “Don’t need your help.”

With those few words, the look of amusement on the brunette’s face only grows. “Right, right”, she says silently. “Cause you’re totally not hanging helplessly by the foot.”

I mutter under my breath, “it’s by the ankle”. Now that I’m no longer wiggling, I start going in slow circles again.

“Well excuse my lack of human anatomy”, the brunette puts the knife away in some secret pocket. “I, the person not hanging from a tree, am going to go study human anatomy”, she puts the stick in her belt. There’s a few seconds of silence before she says, rather bratty, “I doubt I’ll have trouble finding you.”

“Pfft, why even bother coming back?”

I can feel her looking at me. I know she hears my question yet I get no answer. 

I risk a quick glance over my shoulder. As I expected the brunette is walking away. She has her hands behind her back as she takes wide but slow steps away from me.

My body goes in another circle.

_ I don’t need your help. _

I go in about two more circles before I cave in.

“Ugh!”, I groan. “Fine! I need your help!”

The brunette is quick to turn around. She bends over so she can look me in the eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t hear you.”

“I need your help!”, I yell. Whispering I say, “I’m stuck. Ok? I’m stuck.”

The brunette stands up. She throws the stick she just sharpened a while ago.

I look up at the rope and watch as the stick goes through the rope breaking it. There’s a quick falling sensation before I slam into the ground.

“Ow.”

I take a few seconds to lie on the forest floor and try to gather myself again. Once my head stops spinning, I lift my head to look at the woman. The first thing I notice is that she is closer than she was before. Reaching into her pants she pulls out a knife. 

_ Uh oh. _

The woman takes a step closer and crouches down.

“Woah”, I move away. “Listen, no reason to-”

“Shut up.” The woman grabs my ankle and pulls it towards her. She cuts off the rope in a simple, calm movement. “You assume too much.”

“Yet you’re the one with a knife.”

The woman stands up putting away her knife as she does so. She looks around as though looking for something… or someone. 

I take this time to stand up and brush the dirt off me. When I look back at the woman, she is looking at me. She doesn’t say anything as she turns around and starts walking away.

“Hey”, I follow behind her. “Where’re you going?”

The brunette turns around suddenly forcing me to come to a sudden stop. “Go away”.

Instead of responding to her, I eye her figure and features. The thing that attracts my attention most is her forest green eyes and her strange hairdo.

The woman turns away and starts walking again. I take a few seconds to wait before following her again. 

The woman tolerates this for a few minutes before turning around and throwing a knife. The weapon flies by my head and hits the tree behind me. “Bants”, she growls.

I lift my hand from my side. The brunette growls, her eyes going to my hand. “Relax”, I whisper. I reach up and touch my ear. On the tip of my ear I can feel something wet which I’m assuming is blood. “That hurt.”

The woman looks me in the eyes. She has a look I can’t describe or don’t realize. She relaxes her hands which were in a ball. 

I tilt my head. 

At first she looks confused at this action but with hesitation she tilts her head.

_ Cute. _

I smile at the brunette.

Her lips seem to twitch as though she’s holding back a smile.

_ Can her people smile? _

At once all the playfulness leaves her eyes. She slowly puts a finger to her lips asking me to be quiet. With that she looks to her left with worry. Whatever she heard or saw has her tense.

I’m about to make a smart remark when I finally hear what the woman heard long before I did.

“Clarke!”

Translation:

Bants - leave


	6. Chapter 6

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

“Clarke!”

I relax since the people aren’t looking for me. I’m not in danger of being found. Unless...

I look towards the woman in front of me. She looks tense and scared, a whole one eighty from her previous mood.

“That you?”, I walk around the blonde and go to retrieve my knife from the tree.

“Maybe.”

I pull my knife from the tree. “Well Clerk-”

“Clarke.”

“That is what I said”, I look at the blonde.

“You said clerk, it’s Clarke.”

“Clerk.”

“No, Clarke.”

“Cler-”

“Clarke.”

“Whatever”, I growl. Why is she so frustrating? “It seems your people are here to get you.”

The blonde nods.

“So you stay there.” I look at my knife trying to see if it is damaged. It’s gonna need some sharpening.

If I want to get this knife sharpened then I better start going. I guess I did enough adventuring for one day. I wonder if my people are looking for me, they probably are but I have no way of knowing since I stand on Skaikru territory.

Speaking of which I need to get on my territory so I’ll be more safe. 

As I’m thinking over my to do list I start walking away from the blonde. I’m sure she’ll be fine on her own. 

**_“No”, my wolf whimpers. “No!”_ **

I’m surprised to find I have a little worry for the Sky girl. Why should I care what happens to her?

**_“Ma-”_ **

“Hey wait”. A hand grabs my wrist trying to get me to stop.

Reacting quickly, I turn around and pull my hand away from the blonde. “Don’t. Touch. Me.”

She puts her hands up. “Sorry”. With a worried look on her face she looks around. “So… um… could you take me with you?”

“With me?”

She nods.

“Like to my camp?”

Another nods.

I immediately shake my head at this stupid idea. “Nuh uh, you are not  **_not_ ** my problem. I helped you so now you leave.”

She steps towards me. “I can’t go back.”

Holding my knife in defence I take a big step away. The blonde’s eyes go to my knife then to my eyes.

“Listen”, she begins. “I don’t want to go back.”

“They are your people.”

“So?! I ran away for a reason. I can explain all that later if you take me with you. Please, help me.”

Lowering my knife I ask “what do I get out of this?”. This brings a small smile to her face but her smile falls as she realizes she has nothing to give.

The panic on her face is obvious. “I don’t know.”

“Then I won’t help. Go back.”

“But I could be of great help to you!”, she blurts out. “I know plans, my people talk about your kind.”

“Am I supposed to be surprised?”

“They don’t like you, uh… I got some knowledge that could help your people.”

I take a step towards her. “You know plans?”

“Yes, big plans”. She nods. “Big, big plans.”

“You’re not lying?”

“I swear I am not lying. Cross my heart and hope to die”. The blonde draws some symbol over her heart.

I frown at this strange action. I do not know why someone would hope to die or even carve a cross on her heart. Seems painful and unnecessary. “Fine”.

The blonde smiles.

“But”, I say. “You stay by my side. Keep quiet when we get to my camp.”

She nods. 

Now that the blonde is no longer a threat, I put my knife away. Taking a look around I try to take a close guess as to where the Skaikru are. Of course they are coming from the direction of their camp, and they must be close if they are willing to shout into a forest.

Do they think this woman was taken?

I look at the blonde only to find she disappeared. Looking around I find her standing at my right side. She’s a few inches away from touching my arm. When she looks up at me with her big bright eyes I can see they are full of hope.

I look away from her.

_ What are you doing Alexandria? _

********

(Clarke’s POV)

I’ve been walking behind the brunette for maybe ten minutes. She hasn’t said a word since we started walking, which is no surprise. At first I was fine with this silence between us. It gave me a chance to look around and at the forest, from a distance somewhat. But surprisingly I am no longer interested in the forest. I am more curious about the brunette who is paying no mind to me.

A bush to my right wiggles as something moves in it. It’s growling.

Taking a step closer to the brunette I look up at her. “So”.

Brunette notices the change in our distance but she doesn't say anything about it. It doesn’t seem to bug her as much as I assumed it would.

“This place is gorgeous.”

I get no response.

“So… you get to see this everyday?”

No response.

“So glad you guys don’t have tails sticking out of your asses”, I mumble. “That would’ve been concerning… and scary.”

The Trikru woman growls.

To my right is a colorful plant. It glows even under the sun. “You don’t seem to be a savage”, I reach out towards the bush.

The brunette turns around in one quick motion. She threateningly holds a knife between the plant and me. “Don’t touch”, she growls.

I move my hand away from the bush.

She puts her knife away. “My people are not the savages.” “Your people are”, she growls.

I open my mouth to say something in defence of my people but she says, “now shut up. We are here.”

I nod. The brunette starts walking again and we slowly fall back into the silence. She pushes the leaves of a bush away as she walks through it. I hesitate at first but soon follow her through the bush. Although I should’ve noticed the buildings from afar, I am just now seeing them.

Mixed in with the huts are tents and running between the buildings are children chasing one another. A few adults walk among them. They say something to the children every now and then.

To the right of all this is a stream that cuts between the land. It’s shallow but not something someone would want to walk through. To connect the two lands is a makeshift bridge. The bridge forms into some path that winds between twelve stands.

Each stand seems decorated to fit what they are selling. Some stands sell jewelry while others sell food. The grown ups who are shopping at the stands have a basket. There’s a lack of kids by the stands so the grown up seem to get a peace of mind over there. They also talk with other adults.

A little kid who is walking with her mom points at the stream. The mom says something and the little girl runs into the stream to play with the other kids.

_ They seem so carefree. _

“C’mon”, the brunette mumbles.

I follow behind her. She leads me to the camp border and stops. I am now in view of the villagers. Fortunately none of the villagers notice me. They are more focused on everyday things.

“Mama!”, a little girl says. “Look!”

The mom looks at me. She drops her basket and gasps. “Don’t look”, she pulls her daughter away.

Like a wave the people pull their kids to them and stare at me. The camp goes into complete silence as families hide their children behind them while others gather their family into their hut. As much as I hate their reaction I can’t blame them. It makes me question what things my people have done to them.

A bald woman with a spear walks over to brunette and me. She says something that sounds like “head” to the brunette then nods. The brunette nods back. After this nodding thing they start a conversation in a language I can’t understand yet everyone here seems to.

A few minutes have passed when the brunette finally speaks in english. “This woman”, she motions to me. “For her stay will be under my watch and care”. She raises her voice so everyone can hear, “you harm her, you harm me.”

The people break out into shouting. Some yell things in english and others in some other language. One person shouts, “burn her! Make her pay for what her people have done!”.

The shouts go on for a while. Slowly the crowd seems to move closer.

Inside I can feel my wolf pacing. It’s begging me to let it out and fight. Protect.

Instead of turning to a fight I step behind the brunette. Peeking over her shoulder I look at the crowd of people. 

A deep growl comes from the brunette. It gets louder and louder until she shouts “pleni” at everyone. The crowd immediately goes quiet. “Come.”

_ Gladly. _

Staying close to the brunette I allow her to lead me through the crowd. The crowd parts to let their leader through and keep away from me. One kid reaches out and jabs a hand at me. Others more daring feel my clothes and some touch my skin. 

“She’s not reptilian like”, a kid whispers.

“Where’s her tail Mama?”, another asks.

“Ain’t she supposed to walk on six legs?”

“Does she have a wolf?”

“How can she breathe our air?”

“Will she eat me?”

Crossing my arms I try to deal with the whispers and poking, touching. Everything. All the crap these people are dishing out on silver platters.

The brunette, “head” apparently, looks over her shoulder and at me. She’s about to say something but her eyes snap to some man who is reaching out to me. Without hesitation she launches at the man. Instead of a human landing on the man a black wolf does. The wolf’s teeth are showing as it snarls at the man. It’s green eyes are full of anger.

I step away from the big beast. I’ve seen wolves in pictures that were around the ark but they weren’t that big. 

When the wolf lifts its head and looks at me I take another step back. Although I want as much distance between us as possible I feel rather comfortable with this black beast. Something about it.

Turning away the wolf snaps its jaws in the man’s face. The sound of bones cracking fills the air as the wolf slowly turns into the brunette I’ve come to recognize.

_ What the actual fuck! _

“Reculer!”, the bald woman shouts at the people.

The brunette gives me a look. It’s outlined with helplessness. I feel like she wants to approach me but she can’t. Not in front of her people anyways.

She turns away and starts walking as though nothing has happened.

I’m led into a huge tent which I’m guessing is her home. It’s warm inside and looks cozy. Smells nice but that’s due to the insane amount of candles. How does she sleep at night knowing her tent could burst up in flames in any minute.

From further inside the tent a female voice rings out. “I was waiting for you”.

A redhead walks out from behind a tent flap. She has nothing but underwear on but yet she doesn’t seem to care. She walks with some weird sway in her hips meant to seduce the brunette.

So the brunette has a significant other…

**_“Good”, my wolf plops down in the water._ **

**What has you in a bad mood?**

This mystery woman walks over to brunette and plants a kiss on her lips. A big wet, sloppy kiss. She plants another then another. These kisses turn into her passionately making out with the brunette. 

Awkwardly I look away from the scene unfolding in front of me. I can hear how moist redhead’s lips are. It sounds like stirring soup.

When she does stop kissing the brunette a single thread of spit runs from her lips to the brunette’s. “Oh”, she says. Her eyes seek out mine but I refuse to meet her gaze. “What’s wrong?”

I don’t know why I am refusing to meet eyes with a Beta. I should be the dominant one here but she has some scary eyes. At this point I am willing to submit to her.

**_“No”._ **

Ok, maybe not submit.

Stepping in front of me the redhead runs a finger down my cheek.

I finally look at her and she smiles. Her smile sends a million shivers down my spine and her eyes… her cat-like eyes. 

“We have a visitor.”

Translation:

Pleni - enough (weird how it sounds like plenty)

Reculer (french) - step back/back off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to use a french word because the translation I have doesn’t translate all words.
> 
> I decided to have Lexa pronounce Clarke’s name wrong just because she doesn’t originally speak english but I looked up “Clarke meaning”  
> “Clarke is a surname which means "clerk"... coincidence.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's going to be one chapter update tomorrow. This chapter is on the long side but I'm still updating another one since I didn't put a warning note on the last chapter so y'all are expecting a two chapter update. I will put another reminder at the end.

********

(Raven’s POV)

I walk into Clarke’s house. When I do I can hear excited voices coming from the living room. It sounds like a bunch of schoolgirls. Well schoolgirls in the movies… schoolgirls in camp are creepy. They don’t know how to act like children.

I walk into the living room and as expected John, Wells and Abby are in the living room. They excitedly talk about the upcoming wedding. I’m not surprised Clarke isn’t down here. She would be glaring at her mom the whole time.

“I’ve always wanted a son”, John chuckles with Wells. 

I’m sure Wells has been craving a dad even since his went crazy and left to search for… whatever the fuck it was. By now that old man is long dead.

Wells and John chuckle about all this but Abby being herself decides to ruin the mood. She says, “I would’ve gladly given you one.”

Her little comment makes John and Wells go quiet.

“Mrs. Griffin”, Wells says. You can see the sweat building up on his forehead. He’s not very good at starting new conversations unless it’s with Clarke.

“Good morning”, I say hoping to lighten the mood.

“Oh, Raven”, Abby beckons me over with a wave of her hand. “It’s nice to see you before the wedding.”

“You too”, I say. “Is that a new dress?”

“Oh glad someone noticed”, she shoots a glare at John. “I had this specially made.”

“Looks like Clarke’s.”

“Ah yes, ever since she was little we would always dress to match. Why not during her wedding?”

_ Cause a wedding is about the bride… _

I have a feeling Abby wore the dress so she would also be the center of attention. Just always has to be the main attraction.

“Right… is Clarke awake yet?”

Abby looks at her husband like he should have the answers.

“I actually haven’t seen her today”, he says. “She must be sleeping in.”

“That’s my daughter for you”, Abby chuckles. Though she’s laughing you can see the frustration on her face. “How can she not be up already? Do you mind waking her up?”, Abby looks at Margaret who is busying herself with cleaning. 

Weird thing is the spot Margaret is cleaning is already clean. She doesn’t answer as she sweeps at the spot even more.

“Margaret… that is clean.”

“Oh dear.” Margaret has beads of sweat on her face. “Oh dear, oh dear.”

“Margaret!”, Abby snaps.

“Yes?”, she looks at her.

“Did you no-”

“I can go get Clarke.” I’m quick to interrupt the upcoming argument. Wel… more of interrupting Abby yelling at Margaret. “I am her best friend after all.”

I run up the stairs before anyone can object with some dumb reasoning. I go to Clarke’s room and without knocking I walk in. “Clarke!” I look at the bed expecting a groan or something but there’s no response. Not even a moment on her bed. “Com on sleepyhead. Time to wake up.”

I get no response.

“Clarke, I’m serious.”

Still nothing.

With a heavy sigh I walk over to the bed and pull the blanket off. Instead of the usual curled up figure I see and empty bed.

I look around in panic. “Clarke?”, I sprint to the bathroom. “Clarke, are you in there?”

My question is answered with silence. 

I begin to open the bathroom door. 

_ Please let her be in here. Alive preferably. _

I open the door. No one is in the bathroom. Inspecting the room I see Clarke’s toothbrush is in its usual spot. So no one has used it today. There are fresh towels sitting on the counter. Margaret had to have delivered that last night.

I leave the bathroom and call out “Clarke!”. I run out of the empty room and down the hall. I open every room without knocking, some I check twice maybe three times. “She’s not here!”, I shout once every room has been checked.

I run down the stairs. As I’m running I slip on the last step. My stomach is the first thing to hit the floor.

“Raven?”, Abby looks at me with a “concerned” look. “You o-”

“Clarke”, I push myself to my knees. “She’s not here.”

Everyone has a different reaction to this news. On the far side of the room Margaret tenses up. She doesn’t say anything as she scrubs the clock with force. On the couch Abby lets out some agonized noise. John jumps off the couch he’s sitting on so he can go to her side and calm her down. Wells is the most calm in this situation. I can tell he’s shocked but he’s keeping his emotions under control. 

“Are you sure?”, he asks.

“Yes.”

Abby is finally done making noises. “Someone”, she looks around at all of us. “Someone check outside. Have everyone searching!”

Not missing a beat Wells runs outside. I stand up and follow after him. Wells runs up to a guard. He tries to appear calm but the panic is too obvious. “Search this camp for Clarke”. He doesn’t seem embarrassed about his voice cracking.

A few guards look up from their meals while others continue to eat.

“Guys!”, Wells shouts. 

Bellamy looks up from his knife. He admires the blade for a second before asking, “is she missing?”

Wells nods.

“Like really missing, not just hiding?”. Jacobi, a guard who hates Clarke, asks this.

“Yes!”

Lincoln chokes on his food. His face heats up from embarrassment but that doesn’t stop him from shouting orders. “You heard the man! Get searching!”

“Yes sir!”. The guards march off and start searching. I can tell a few aren’t putting in any effort.

_ I really do hope you’re not hiding. _

I watch as a few guards search in obvious places, some laugh as one guard looks under a rock. How dumb do they think Clark is?

“Mrs. Bird.”

I turn around at the mention of my nickname. “Yes?”

“They”, Margaret begins. “They won’t’ find M’lady.”

I wait for the maid to continue.

“M’lady, she said she needed air last night. She left and never came back.”

“What?”

“I’m sorry.”

“You knew this all along?!”

Margaret flinches. She takes a step back but doesn’t respond.

_ Deep breath Raven. _

I take in a deep breath hoping to calm down. “Ugh, Margaret!”

“I’m sorry”, she repeats.

_ She never came back. _

You don’t just not come back. She had to have gone somewhere… somewhere away from camp. The only place she would go. The forest.

I run over to the fence to find evidence of something. Anything. I start walking along the fence keeping an eye for some weak point or a sign that Clarke got out. I come across a few spots that have been attacked by forest animals. There’s one spot where little Johnny hangs out. He picks at the fence but it’s no real damage.

I’ve walked half the fence when I spot a part of the fence that isn’t in the ground.

_ You really did it Blondie. _

“What’re you doing there Bird?”

I glance at who has joined me by the fence. Octavia’s brother, Bellamy. I’m not surprised he isn’t searching for Clarke. I am yet to figure out their complicated relationship.

“Nothing.” I respond as monotone as possible.

“Raven”, he says with warning, outlining his voice.

I step out of the way of the fence. When I do the fence is revealed. “She’s not in camp.”

Bellamy, with a look of shock, walks over to the weak part of the fence. He crouches and feels the fence. “She’s in the forest”, he whispers.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

My body seemed to have failed. Everything not registering that it can move, move away from this cat-eyed woman.

Feeling too scared for comfort I seek out a source of comfort. My wolf. I dig deep and find her cowering in a corner. She’s too scared to do anything.

**You’re scared of a Beta?**

**_“You are too!”_ **

“What pretty eyes”, the woman sings out. “Pretty blue eyes. I’m jealous.”

I tear my eyes away from her and focus on what’s in front of me. With a nervous glance I look at the cat-eyed woman. She’s already looking at me. She doesn’t blink or look away as her smile remains on her face.

She takes a step closer to me. The first thing I notice is her breasts. Small but pointy. She’s definitely proud of them as she lets them out for everyone to see. “Like what you see?”

Holding back a dry heave I force my eyes to look away from them. I will look at anything that isn’t her breasts.

Cat Eyes chuckles. “A shy one.”

Over Cat Eyes’ shoulder I see the brunette looking at me. Her eyes reveal nothing to me as she watches my movement. When she catches me looking her eyes seem to change. Something about that change draws my wolf out of her corner. It’s enough to make my wolf begin to crawl out of her corner but a voice pushes her back in.

“Right here”, two fingers snap in my face.

I look away from brunette.

“Calm down little duck.” Cat Eyes reaches out to me. She places a cold finger on my neck. “I ain’t gonna do anything… yet.”

I want to step away, leave this tent but where would I go? I could turn and run. I could do the smart thing and run back home where I am destined safety. I would live in peace inside the walls but I would never forget what happened. 

Sharp nails run down my neck. The touch sends unwanted shivers up my spine as the nails make their way down and towards my chest. The further down she goes, the more I tense up.

Her blue eyes don’t break contact with mine. She watches my reaction as she drags her nail down over my chest, lingers there for a few seconds before moving towards my stomach.

From behind her a low, threatening growl comes from brunette.

Cat Eyes stops her movements. “What’s wrong Lex?”

“Hands off.”

“I’m just having fun with the vir-”

“Off!”, a hand grabs Cat Eyes’. It tears her hand away from me.

Cat Eyes laughs. “Oh you”, she smiles. “Why is she here?”

I assume the two will have a long conversation but they don’t. They glare at one another instead of sharing words and trying to calm down. My Omega instincts kick in as I want to stop a potential fight breaking out. It’s just natural that an Omega would want peace. We’re known to raise children and we don’t fight… we’re the peacekeepers.

When my wolf whimpers begging me not to do anything I come to the realization that I don’t have to calm them down. I don’t even have to step between them. They don’t care for my opinion so staying back is probably the best decision.

I start making distance between me and them when I start wandering around the room. I wish to go further into the tent to get a good look but I don’t. I have a fear that she will get mad and consider this stepping over the line and she’s the only thing keeping me safe. I also stay close because of the pair of eyes I can feel watching me. Something tells me it’s the brunette.

I do a quick scan of my surroundings. Doing this tells me a few things about the tent.

One: the tent isn’t one whole tent. They are two tents put together therefore making it bigger. It is no surprise they did this since their leader should have the best.

Two: the design is really bland unlike how most people would make their tents/huts feel like home. This woman, the brunette, did not do that. It’s as though no one lives here. So either the brunette is a busy woman or doesn’t care for design. I’m guessing the first one.

One of the tent walls isn’t as sturdy as the others. My guess that that wall is actually the entrance to the second tent.

_ That tent hides something brunette doesn't want others to see. Maybe privacy reasons. _

I turn away from the “wall” and face the brunette. I’m surprised to see it’s just the brunette now. I question where Cat Eyes went but I don’t dare ask. I don't think the brunette liked Cat Eyes… or maybe I’m misjudging because of her face. She doesn’t show much emotion.

Does she have a smile? Natural RBF?

The brunette walks over to a counter that holds many cups. She grabs one and pours something into it. She notices me watching. “Want one?”

“No thanks.”

She doesn’t look at me but I notice her eyebrow raise a little like she’s questioning something I did. Maybe I said something wrong?

“You’re home is nice.”

The brunette continues making her drink acting like she didn’t hear me. As she’s making her drink a silence spreads between us. I kinda expected her to talk and ask questions but she seems fine with the silence.

“Um-”

I’m thrown a glare that yells “shut up”. In the silence she finishes making her drink and walks over to the table. Very casually she takes a seat on a chair at the far end of the table. Crossing her legs she takes a sip of whatever is in her drink.

A pair of forest green eyes find my eyes. They look at me with a strange look. Like they’re expecting something from me.

I don’t move from my spot since I don’t understand what her eyes are trying to tell me. A part of me really wishes I knew. That I could figure out what she wanted just by looking into her eyes. What she was feeling. Is that creepy?

“Sit.”

I mean… I can look into Raven’s eyes and know what she is feeling. Well most of the time I can. Sometimes I can’t. In fact if I look into the eyes of anyone at my camp I can tell what they’re feeling… sometimes even what they’re thinking.

Despite all that something deep inside me wants to be able to understand the brunette.

A low growl snaps me out of my thoughts. I look around as my settings settle in. I’m still in the tent, the brunette is still sitting at the table.

I glance at the table as her words, or word, come back to my mind. “Oh.” I move over to the table and take a seat. I sit in the seat farthest from the brunette. “So…”

The brunette takes a sip. “What good does being here do for you?”

“Well- wait”. “Before I answer anything can I at least know your name?”

The brunette looks at me over the rim of her cup. Her green eyes stare at me with some ferocity but also uncertainty. The longer I stare into her green emerald eyes the further I travel into the forest they hold. Yet the deeper I get the more I lose myself.

**_“Mysterious.”_ **

I cough and look away. Dropping my eyes I look at the table and watch as one of my fingers run along the edge. “You… you know mine so shouldn’t I get to know yours?”

“You don’t get anything”, she growls.

I feel myself flinch away at the sound of voice. This woman, she is the only thing keeping me safe yet she herself is a threat. I’ll have to move with caution.

The brunette sets her cup down. “How long do you wish to stay here?”

I shrug.

“Did you intend to come here?”

I shrug.

“Did your people send you here?”

Another shrug.

“Ok… are you gonna go back to your people?”

“Hell no!”, I blurt out. 

She raises her eyebrows.

I lower my voice. “No.”

“Then what are you gonna do?”

I open my mouth to answer but words fail to come out. I watch as the brunette gets out of her seat. She walks towards me. Her movement like that of a panther. Silent… mysterious. When she’s close she moves behind me, removing herself from my eyesight.

I know alarm bells should be going off. I should look behind myself. I should have one eye on her at all times, yet I don’t. Yet I sit in this dumb chair frozen with fear. Is it fear?

I feel the brunette lift my hair. Her fingers brush against the back of my neck. They do a little dance up and down. The tiny motion sends pleasant shivers through me.

“Um-”, my seat is forcefully pulled away from the table. I’m left stranded like my own island.

The brunette steps in front of me. “I could force you to leave and that would be the end of this.”

I look up at her. Something tells me she won’t kick me out. For once her eyes betray her words.

She seems to notice this as her eyes hide all previous emotion. “But… yes that’ll do. I mean it’ll take some time and work. A new change of clothes and hairstyle”, she crosses her arms. “I’ll do that.”

“Do what?”

“If you are to stay here then you gotta blend in, be one of us.” The brunette walks away. “You will train everyday to be more like us. I will have people teach you how to survive out in the forest. In exchange for this knowledge and teaching, you give us whatever knowledge you have about your people.”

“Do I get a say in this?”

“If you wanna survive, no.”

_ If that’s how it is then so be it. _

The brunette walks over to the exit. “Luna!”, she yells through the open tent flap.

It only takes a few seconds before I start hearing another voice. I assume the voice belongs to the woman named Luna. This person, maybe Luna, says the same things the bald woman said. “Head”.

I move my seat a little to the left so I can try and get a look at the person. I tilt my head to get a better view. Through a thin opening of the tent flap I see a woman with midnight blue hair. She has this serious look on her face that turns into annoyance then curiosity.

A few seconds pass before she notices me looking at her. When she does notice she smiles at me. “And who might you be?”, she pushes past brunette and walks over to me.

Not sure who she is, I don’t respond. Instead I watch as the woman walks around me seeming to take note of my features. I watch as the woman walks around seeming to take note of my features.

_ Why does everyone seem to be doing that? _

“You must be the one I’m helping… yes you must be”, she stops in front of me.

“Well?”, brunette asks.

“Give me a few minutes and she’ll be dressed like one of us in no time.”

“Take as long as you want.”

Grabbed by the wrist I’m dragged into what I think is the second tent. Once in there the woman lets my wrist go when we step into a bland looking bedroom. Well design wise it is empty but with items not really. The bed seems to take up most of the space. Other than the bed the room holds a few things that other bedrooms would have. There’s a few candles here and there. A pretty rug lies on the floor too.

“Pretty bland huh?”

I look at midnight hair. She’s leaning against a wardrobe, her eyes watching me closely.

“L- Heda can be like that. She  _ is _ like that.”

_ She can be bland? _

The woman sighs and shakes her head. I have a feeling I did something that I shouldn’t have. Maybe I was supposed to answer? What was I supposed to say?

Not knowing what to say I just tilt my head and wonder if I had annoyed the woman. 

With a smile that could brighten a dark room she says, “you’re cute”.

Inside I feel my wolf growl at the compliment. It’s not embarrassed or bashful, it just hated the compliment.

**_“Why are we here?”_ **

However, I feel different. I know my face is red as I feel it heating up. I quickly look away from her hoping that will help my face go from a tomato to its usual color.

“Anyways, I have to dress you in something that you can move around in”. She motions to the clothes I’m wearing. “Which isn’t that.”

Just like her brunette friend she doesn’t wait for me to answer. The woman disappears into a room I wasn’t aware was there. From here I can hear her mumbling about something as she rummages through stuff.

“No, this won’t work”, a shirt flies out of the room. “Ugh, does she not have anything better?”. Another shirt lands in the room. “Bleh! I can smell Costia on this!”.

So she must be in some walk-in closet.

“Hmm”. With one brave step I start searching the room. I start with a bag by the bed. There’s not much in the bag. A few clothes, a map and pencils. Pushing the bag away I move over to the dresser.

Like most dressers I have come across this one has some weird pattern. It has a few swirls on the corner but nothing too big and extravagant. I expected the leader would have the best and the most awesome things.

On top of the dresser there are a few things. I can’t tell if they are there for design or just discarded items. The items consist of a few candles, two books, one is open and the other isn’t, and a map. I think it’s a map.

I’m reaching to open a drawer when someone says, “snoopy snoopy”.

Turning away from the dresser I take a step away from it. “I-”

“Try that on”, she tosses clothes onto the bed. She doesn’t seem to care for my reasoning.

I don’t move towards the clothes. Should I be putting on someone else’s clothes?

“Don’t worry. I’m not gonna tell her about you snooping. Even if I did”, her eyes run over me. “Nevermind.”

_ Ok? _

I head over to the bed to get a look at the clothes. A tank top, leather jacket and some pants. I assume the clothes will fit me but I don’t care if they’re bigger than my actual size.

I reach down to take my shirt off when something triggers my brain. She’s still here. I turn to midnight hair.

“Is there a problem?”

“Maybe…”

With a chuckle that despite her laughing at me, it sounds like music to my ears.

**_“No!”_ **

“Don’t tell me you're embarrassed”, a smile spreads across her face.

I shrug.

**_“Out! Out!”_ **

“Oh just undress, we’re both females. What do you have that I don’t?”

I pick up the clothes and walk over to the other side of the bed to get dressed. As I dress I make sure to keep my back to midnight hair. Once I got everything on I face her.

“Hmm”, she hums. “I suppose it’ll do… you blend in a lot more than you did a few minutes ago.”

I’m assuming that’s good.

“Then again… maybe it’s the hair but give it a few days and that won’t be a problem.”

_ “...won’t be a problem”? _

I reach up and touch my golden locks.

_ What does she mean by that? _

Panic floods through me. I like my hair. In fact I love it. It’s something that’s uniquely mine. No one in my family from grandparents to great grandparents and on have never had this color. Don’t take that.

**_“Should’ve ran when you had the chance”._ **

“C’mon on then.”

We walk out of the bedroom and back into the kitchen/living room area. When we walk out the brunette looks up from a piece of paper.

“Well?”, midnight asks.

Brunette makes her way over to me. “You did good Luna”. She eyes my hair with some look of concern. “Though the hair sticks out but she can do as she pleases with it”.

_ Thank god. _

Her eyes go away from my hair and down to my eyes. When she taps my chin with two fingers I look up at her. Looking into her forest eyes brings a voice that isn’t mine or my wolf’s fills my head. 

“Your eyes will stick out”, the voice is gone in a second.

Midnight coughs attracting both our attention. “Can you tell me what you plan to do with a Trikru woman?”

Head shrugs. “For now, I do not know”.

Midnight, Luna I believe, nods. She looks at me through the corner of her eyes. From the look in her eyes I can tell she has a lot more to say but not to brunette. To me.

“Hate to say it but Luna and I have a busy schedule. I assume you can take care of yourself today. You can, right?”

“I’m sure she can”, Luna scoffs.

Head shoots a glare at Luna so fast that I think it didn’t happen. I think my mind is playing tricks. I would also be playing tricks if I was brought onto enemy territory.

I take a step back to get some space between me and the two women. With a step towards the tent flap I nod.

“Good, go on then”, the brunette shooes me away.

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

I watch as the blonde makes her way to the exit of the tent and leaves with no hesitation. I wait for a few seconds to see if she’ll come crawling back but there’s no sign of her. Once she’s gone a million questions come to mind. Will she be ok? What if someone hurts her? Will she run off? Will she meet her mate? And why do I care?

Frustrated I pull on my hair. “Ugh!”

From inside I can feel my wolf pacing as she’s equally confused. She has a permanent scowl on her face.

**_“This makes no sense.”_ **

“Lexa?”

Ignoring Luna I walk over to the tent flap and open it just enough so I can see out. I spot the blonde immediately. She’s walking away from the tent in a straight line. As she walks she looks around with a sense of wonder and amazement, maybe some fear too.

So she won’t go far. She won’t even leave camp. 

_ She’ll be fine. _

**_“Will she?!”_ **

Since the blonde isn’t paying attention she bumps into someone carrying a basket of apples. The collision causes the person to drop their apples. He curses as he watches them roll away from him.

The panic obvious on the blonde’s, Clarke’s face she apologizes over and over again. As she’s apologizing she gets on her knees and picks up some of the apples. She sets them back into the basket but not before checking for bruises. For some apples she brushes the dirt off them.

When all the apples are back in the basket she stands up and helps the man stand up. She hands him the basket with one more apology.

The person who now holds the basket doesn’t say anything to Clarke. He stands there, frozen where he is as he looks at Clarke with amazement. A few people also look at her with the same expression. Some start whispering to one another.

“Is the kid already in trouble?”, Luna looks over my head.

Clarke has noticed the looks of confusion on people’s faces. She looks around in confusion probably wondering if what she did was wrong. Her eyes catch mine. A helpless look falls onto her face but she’s quick to wipe it away. With a shrug she starts walking again.

“Hey!”, the man stops her.

I get ready to have to walk out there and calm him down but instead of yelling he tosses an apple to her. “Thanks”, and just like that he also continues on his way.

The man walks by me and I get a strong smell of pheromones. A pheromone that upsets me. A scent marking pheromone.

_ Did he just mark my- _

“She helped him”. Luna steps away from me.

“It appears so”, I say not meaning to growl.

Luna gives me a weird look. 

“Let’s just get to work”, I mumbles.

“Lexa”. Luna laughs her usual carefree laugh. “You found a weird one”.

I mumbles something that I don’t even understand. That damn man! Who does he think he is?!

**_“Bad.”_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One chapter update tomorrow.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raven’s POV is taking place at the time Lexa would have decided to take Clarke to her camp.

********

(Raven’s POV)

“This forest”, I grumble as I step over the 50th fallen tree. I’m beginning to get annoyed by this mysterious forest. 

With each step I take the deeper I go into a place I’ve never been before. I don’t mind it as much as I should since I have 15 other people in the forest with me.

Although we may be a “team” out here, our goals are very different. The guards are looking for a certain blonde. I am not.

I know I should be looking for my friend but a part of me doesn’t want her to be found. I know if she is found, wherever she may be hiding, then she would be dragged back to the camp she hates so much. She probably hates it more than her mom at this point. On top of all that she would get an earful from her stupid, over bearing mother while her good for nothing dad just watches in the background. Man, worst parents ever!

I take this “free” time to look at things I haven’t seen or touched. I touch plants I could only dream of touching and smell flowers I have never seen before. Each plant is unique and beautiful. They’re nothing like the books we would read in space. Nothing like them.

It’s obvious that the radiation affected plants… maybe animals. 

I can see why Clarke was so amazed by the forest. This place is amazing.

I wonder what it looks like at night.

“Raven!”, Bellamy shots. From behind me I can hear him as he approaches me. He isn’t exactly silent. I wonder how he became a guard. “I know you haven’t been out before but would you please focus?”

“Yeah, yeah”. I walk away from the bush of flowers I was smelling. Just to please Bellamy, and get him off my back, I take a deep breath and call out, “Clarke!”

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

****************

How long have I been working?

I have to tear my eyes away from the many papers littered across the table. I was so distracted by work that the day just flew by. 

Now that I’m not focused on work I just now realize how quiet it is… how quiet it has been for the past hour or so. Too quiet.

I stand up and search for my partner in crime. My left leg in most cases. It’s no surprise to find her fast asleep on the couch. Drool runs out of her mouth and onto a pillow.

Is that late?

I make my way over to Luna. I grab a blanket and put it over her so she can stay warm for the night. She makes a soft moaning sound as she dives deeper into a slumber for the night. With her taken care of I make my way to my bedroom to get some sleep myself.

I’m too lazy to blow out the candles so I head straight to the bed. I’m about to lie down when I remember I have another person to care for. Well watch after. The blonde, the blonde I haven’t seen for hours.

If I find a body…

Despite my deep wishes I head out of the tent to search for the blonde. I look at the two guards who guard my tent. They stare straight ahead as they deal with the harsh cold night. 

“Ha-”

A guard points straight ahead.

I follow his hand and look at where he points. He points at a figure sitting on a log. The figure is looking up at the night sky, the cold not seeming to bother them. There’s blondie. I’m glad I didn’t have to search the whole camp.

Walking over to her I stand a few feet back. I let her have a few minutes to herself before saying, “you gonna sleep out here or come in?”

The blonde closes her eyes. She didn’t even jump or flinch when hearing my voice. It looks as though she’s not surprised by hearing my voice or even shocked I’m here. 

The blonde lowers her head and opens her eyes. She focuses on her hand.

“You can talk, you know.”

She nods. “I… I just don’t want to say the wrong thing”.

Insecure much.

“You won’t.”

She looks at me. 

“Come on”. I motion towards the tent. “I’d rather go to sleep than stay up all night”.

She keeps looking at me with this helpless look. I don’t think she means to give me that look. However, that helpless look slowly turns into a different look. A one of joy. A heartwarming smile spreads across her face. 

I turn away from her and start walking. The blonde leaps up and follows behind me. We walk past a sleeping Luna and go into my bedroom.

“I would have you sleep on the couch but Luna is there right now. You can sleep wherever you want”. I start undressing. I head over to my bed to get on when I spot the blonde. She’s silently sitting in a corner.

This kid.

I grab a pillow and blanket, “here”, I toss them to her. “Keep warm tonight”, I mumble.

“Thanks”. Her ocean eyes look at me. “Thanks for everything.”

I look back at the blonde who is still looking at me. Slowly she begins to smile. She has such an innocent smile, one not yet destroyed by humans.

I turn away from her. “Whatever”. I climb into bed and before she can start a conversation I blow out the candles. The darkness is quick to wrap its cold arms around both of us.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update. School got in the way 🤷

September 11th, 5057

********

(Clarke’s POV)

**“Back!”, my wolf snaps at something only she can see. She tries to scare the invisible threat away from her. Away from me. “Get back!”**

**I can’t see what she’s scared of but I know it’s not good. I do hope it’s not a threat.**

Bolting upright I take a look at my surroundings. I can feel the panic rushing through me as I do so. 

_ Where am I? _

I look around with uncertainty and confusion. Slowly everything starts coming back. Leaving camp, hanging by the foot, brunette. So I’m still in the brunette’s tent meaning for the time being I am safe. Am I?

I can feel sweat running down my face and back. I feel so gross.

Getting out of my “bed” I stand up and do a few stretches. After stretching I absentmindedly move to take my clothes off but they’re not there. They lie in a pile by my pillow. 

_ When did I take them off? _

A gag worthy smell surrounds me. I assume it’s me from all the sweating I did through the night. I don’t want to smell like shit for the whole day so a shower is on my list of first things to do.

I put on my clothes and leave the bedroom. When I step out of the bedroom, midnight hair looks up from her drink. Her eyes widen as she splutters out her drink.

“The hell”. Midnight nudges brunette.

Brunette is already looking at me. She blinks at me a few times as words seem to fail her. “I…”, she glances at Luna for help. “You don’t look too good”.

I’m not in the mood to talk about anything with them. If I did want to talk I wouldn't tell them anything. I don’t really know the pair. 

“Is there somewhere I can bathe?”

Midnight glances at brunette.

“Yeah… but doubt you’d like it”, brunette looks at me.

“I think everyone else would hate it more than her”, midnight chimes in. “I know! Just have her use your personal showers”.

_ Of course brunette has personal showers. Who needs more than one shower? _

“Luna you can take her.”

“Wha-”

“I have a few things to do.”

“So do I.”

I take a step away from the two of them out of fear of a fight breaking out. I’ve known people who have talked back to their leader. It always ended in some dangerous fight, if they did make it out alive their status in the pack would drop greatly.

Though it is rare for someone to talk back to a leader because what the leader says goes. Simple as that.

A raging fire lights up in brunette’s eyes. The atmosphere in the room changes from calm and confusing to on fire, dangerous. Someone might get burned.

Brunette turns to look at midnight hair. They meet eyes, neither of them saying anything. 

_ Is this how people show dominance? I thought it was by pheromones… I like this way better. _

Luna looks away first showing submission to the brunette.

“Sha Heda”, she whispers. Midnight stands up, “shall we go?”

I nod. Yes please.

Midnight leaves the tent without saying another word. I look at brunette who doesn’t seem to be coming. I knew that but do I like it?

When brunette catches my eyes she gives me a look that says, “is there a problem?”.

I give her a small wave then slip out of the tent. 

“You coming or not?”

Luna leads me to a hut that’s closer to the center of the camp than the edge. The hut’s outer walls have rocks on it that shine in the sun. Almost like pearls or something. Sitting on the roof is a chimney that has steam coming out of it. 

As we get closer to the hut I begin to feel hotter. The hut is like it’s own ball of fire. The heat escaping from under the doors and affecting anyone who gets too close. I’m shocked to hear a scream come from inside. This is followed up by a giggle.

One woman says, “Anna! I was surprised when you came into the shower hut. How’s the kids?”

I look at Luna with fearful eyes.

_ Is she going to make me bathe with them? _

“This is one of the shower huts. It’s the most popular because it has Heda’s personal shower room. Many hope they’ll get a glimpse of her walking in or something”, Luna glances at me. “Don’t mind the screaming. Women gossip in here since kids aren’t in the shower hut at this time. They always shower closer to night.”

**_“I still hate this.”_ **

“We’ll go through the back so no one sees you.”

I’m happy to hear this but also disappointed. Strange that I feel lonely here when I left Skaikru to escape that feeling. I guess I’ll just have to search until I lose that feeling. Once I get the necessary training I’ll leave this place and I’m positive I’ll find a place where I belong whether it be by myself or in another clan. Or maybe in my own clan. Imagine that.

**_My wolf snickers at me as she shakes her head. “If you would focus on finding your mate then you would never be alone.”_ **

“Hey”, I feel Midnight nudge my shoulder. “Don’t take it personally”.

“I… I-”, I cut myself off. I decide on silence.

The two of us walk through a door and into a hot room. I’m not surprised to see no one in this room. This must be Head’s personal shower room. 

Although the shower room is meant for one person, brunette, it has six shower heads lined on a wall. Between each shower head is a curtain to give privacy to whoever may be showering at the time. I have a feeling the curtains aren’t used much. Accompanying each showering stall is a stool for sitting. 

To the right of all the showers is a tub, more of a pool. There’s a big amount of steam coming from the water held in the tub. I assume the water is somewhere between extremely hot to ok hot. The wall in front of the pool is glass. I don’t know why someone would want a glass wall as they soak. It defeats the point of having a personal shower room. It must be weird to see people walk by as you bathe. Unless you shower at night. At night the stars might look gorgeous.

I look back at Midnight who is smiling at me. 

“Impressive huh?”

I nod.

“Yeah, people go all out for Heda. Sad thing is Heda doesn’t use this much. She settles for a bath down at the lake or at the falls. Sometimes a quick bath in the stream”. She walks over to the glass and looks out. “I know you’re shy so I’ll just look out this window.”

I find myself nodding even though she can’t see me.

“Oh, this is a one way window by the way.”

With another nod I undress and turn on a shower.

****************

It’s only been fifteen minutes since I started showering. I’ve washed down my body and scrubbed hard enough that my skin hurts. It feels on fire. I can’t complain too much since this is all too relaxing. Behind me I can feel Luna about to explode if she doesn’t start asking questions. She comes off as a curious person.

I’m in the middle of washing out my hair when Luna finally starts talking.

“So, you’re Skaikru?”

_ Strange question. I assumed she knew. _

Stiffly I continue washing out my hair. “Maybe”.

“I thought your people never left the safety of their fence.”

“Depends on your status.”

“So”, I hear Luna move in her spot. I think she shuffled her feet but she may have moved spots. “Why are you out?”

I let silence hang between us since I’m not answering that question.

“Better yet.”

“Hmm?”

“Why are you at a Trikru camp? Or Grounder, that’s what you call us right?”

_ She’s not gonna give up. _

Sighing I take a seat on the stool and turn off the water. The water runs down my body as it makes its way to the floor. “I ran from my camp.”

“Really?”

“Yes”. I blindly reach out from behind the curtains for my towel. I assume Luna handed it to me since I find it too easily. I get up and wrap the towel around myself before walking out from behind the curtains.

“I had a person bring a new set of clothes. They’re something more casual than your previous clothes. You shouldn’t be doing much today.”

I walk over to a stool that has my new set of clothes on top of it. “Where are you getting these from?”

Luna shrugs. “Make sure to walk out the way you came. Heda should be near there, I have things to do.”

Midnight walks away. I listen to the click the door makes when it’s closed. Although Midnight is long gone, I keep staring at the door. Something tells me she has a deep hatred for me… or my people.

**_“Probably your people”._ **

I shrug it off like I do most things and pick up the clothes.

_ What am I wearing now? _

The clothes that someone chose for me are a green off shoulder shirt, black shorts and a change of undergarments. I don’t know how I feel knowing I’m wearing someone else’s undergarments but I have no right to complain. A pair of sandals wrap up the outfit. 

I dry off and change into the clothes as fast as I can so I can meet this “Heda” woman as soon as possible. Slipping on my shoes I walk out of the shower room. I feel cold once I leave the warm arms of the shower room. Big temperature change from out here and there.

I’ve been standing outside for a few seconds and people are already looking at me with some sort of shock. Those who are close I can hear what they whisper.

“She used Heda’s shower room”.

“Do you think she knew?”.

I look over my shoulder and at the room I just came out of. Is that shower room that big of a deal? It’s just another shower room. Sure it’s a private one but everyone else has the public one.

A person walks by me. I look at him hoping it’s Heda but it’s some big Alpha. When he spots me looking he growls and wafts me with dominant pheromones. I lower my eyes to my feet out of respect.

_ Definitely not Heda. _

“She’s so weird”, a person whispers.

“I’m sure she’s actually here to spy on us”, another whispers. 

Those stupid Betas. I may be Skaikru but that doesn’t change the gender hierarchy. Sure Omegas used to be lower than Betas but now they are above Betas since Betas started going unfertile. 

“R..”, the first person trails off when a low growl comes from somewhere. 

I look up to find the source of the growl. I know it wasn’t me so then who could it be?

“Don’t you girls have something better to do?”, a low, threatening voice asks. 

I look to my right, my surprise obvious as I look up at brunette. I look at her forest green eyes that are focused on the two women who were whispering a few seconds ago. Those women are now cowering in the presence of the brunette.

There’s a strong smell coming from the brunette. I want to get away from it but that won’t help me at all. It doesn’t have a strong effect on me since it’s aimed at the two women.

“Y-yes”, the scurry away.

When they’re out of eyesight Brunette looks at me. Instead of saying anything she walks into the shower room and returns with a towel.

_ She’s gonna hit me. _

I flinch when she walks towards me. My hands raise up to protect myself but nothing comes. Instead of hitting me the brunette stands in front of me.

“Relax”, she lowers my arms. She steps closer and reaches behind me. I can feel the towel moving through my hair as it soaks up any left over water. 

Being me I look down with the intention to look at my feet but instead my eyes go to her breasts. I can feel my face heat up so I look at the brunette’s neck. 

_ Isn’t this a lovely scene? What is everyone else thinking? _

“There”, the brunette whispers. Her hot breath tickles my ears. Brunette takes a step back and tosses the towel to her side.

“So-”

Brunette turns and walks away. 

“Well”, I start following her. I want to ask her a million and one questions but I let the silence stay between us. Even if I asked I doubt the brunette would answer any questions. 

_ But what if she did? _

“You make yourself an easy target.”

“Huh?”

“You look weak when you stand there cowardly”, she glances at the sky then looks at me. “That is why you are targeted.”

I look at the ground.

“I’m gonna show you around camp, try to get you familiar with things… though for your sake I would look for hiding spots.”

I didn’t think I looked that cowardly. I just didn’t want a fight. And what does she mean finding a hiding spot?

“Let’s start with the entrance.”

********

(Raven’s POV)

“Wells”, Abby says. “Can you tell me what you see?”

“M-me?”

“Yes.”

“I… uh… I see a table”, he looks around. “Raven. Guards.”

“Now what don’t you see?”

Wells shrugs. “I… I don’t know.”

“I don’t see a Clarke”, Abby growls through gritted teeth.

I lower my gaze down to the table I sit at. Abby told me she wasn’t mad at me. She said it was the guards duty to find Clarke… and they didn’t.

As of right now Abby is sitting at the far end of the table as she “talks” to the group of soldiers who were searching last night. Each guard stands at the other side of the table. 

“We searched everywhere”, a guard says. “There is no trace of her”.

“Then you should’ve searched harder.”

“I… I think the nighttime rain has washed away all scent trails by now. Not even scent trails, physical trails too”, a guard says.    
“Animals have walked over her tracks”, another says.

“If there were any to begin with”, one mutters his two cents. 

“Did you search other territories?”, Abby asks.

“We assumed your daughter wouldn’t go into other territories.”

“You assumed”, Abby scoffs. “You assumed a girl who has never been in the forest knows the territories!”

The guards don’t respond.

“My daughter had to survive a cold, rainy forest night and all you can do is assume!”

“She’s the one who left”, a guard mumbles.

“Excuse me!”

“Abby”, John attempts to calm her down. There’s a one to zero percent chance of that happening. 

“No!”, Abby growls.

I look up from the table when Abby stands up.

_ This can’t be good. _

“Who was in charge of leading this group?”

None of the guards say anything. They don’t want to rat out their leader, whether it be because they are loyal or don’t want to run more. However, Bellamy steps forward. “I was.”

“Oh, Bellamy”, she smiles. With slow careful steps she makes her way over to the bushy haired boy. She reaches out as though to caress his cheek but slaps him instead. 

The sound bounces off the walls. It crawls its way into my ear where it bounces around continuously.

“You’re a disgrace!”

Bellamy stays quiet.

Abby rips off his badge. “Until further notice you are kicked out of this camp-”

“No!”, Octavia stands up from where she sits. She’s about to move over to Bellamy but Lincoln grabs her and prevents her from running over. 

“You will be welcomed back when you bring my daughter back alive”, Abby turns away. She tosses the badge onto the table. 

Bellamy steps forward. “And if she is found by someone else?”

“Then you better adapt to forest life.”


	10. Chapter 10

********

(Clarke’s POV)

_ How long have I been walking? _

With each new step my feet ache and protest. I’m thankful it’s not hurting because of some dumb fancy shoes. This time it’s because I’ve been walking for the past two hours around this camp. I didn’t think it would be big enough to walk around for two whole hours but the brunette managed to do it. She managed to talk for two hours while walking the camp.

_ Blah blah blah. Blah! _

Her words go in one ear and out the other. I was paying attention but that was at the beginning. I can’t learn that much information or my mind would explode.

“Hey.”

I look at Brunette thinking she’s talking to me but she’s too far ahead. I look around searching for the person.

“Over here”, apple man waves at me.

“Oh… yes?”

**_“Idiot”._ **

Apple man fishes an apple from his bag. “I had a few extra apples”.

I nod. “So I see.”

“Here”, he tosses an apple to me. “For you”.

“Thanks.”

Rotating the apple in my hand I search for bruises or any warning flags. I don't know if I should eat this apple. I was always told to wash fruit off before eating it. That and this apple could be some trick. I might die but an apple is an apple. 

“Enjoy”. The man walks away before I can say anything else.

I shrug and bite into the apple. “Delicious”, I turn and look at brunette. 

Her eyes are focused on something in the distance. “Hmm.”

“Is there a problem?”. I look up at her waiting for her to continue her speech.

“I uh”, she keeps her eyes on the thing in the distance. “Forget it”, the brunette looks at me. “Any questions?”

“Just one.”

“Hmm?”

“What do I call you?”

Instead of giving me a straight, rude answer she thinks about her answer. “Well, what have you been referring to me as?”

“Well I haven’t actually said your name in a conversation or even to you… but I just know you as forest eyes”, I shrug. “The brunette or “head”.”

“Head?”

“Yeah”, I nod. “Is that not what everyone calls you?”

No response.

I look up at the brunette. I wonder why she isn’t saying anything…

She’s looking up at the sky with some intensity.

_ Is… is she trying not to laugh?! _

“Hey!”, I step towards her. “What’s so funny?”

Brunette coughs. “You speak english only, yes?”

I nod.

“It is very obvious.”

“Meaning?”

“It means”, she takes a step back. “They say “heda” not “head”. She spots a stick and picks it up. Using the stick she writes an h followed by e and d then an a. “Heda.”

“Heda”, I repeat.

“However”. Tossing the stick aside she says, “you can call me whatever you please Clarke.”

“I can call you “the brunette” and you would respond?”

“Yes.”

“And if someone else calls you it?”

Brunette looks at me. “Then someone else has called me it.”

“No fun”, I mutter. I take a bite from my apple. I find myself pouting as I stare at my apple.

“No fun?”, she sighs. “What do you wish for me to do?”

“I… I do not know.”

“Then it is settled.”

“Is it?”

“Fine, if someone that is not you calls me “the brunette” or “forest eyes” or even “head” for that matter, I will not respond.”

“Really?”

She nods.

“Ok then”, I smile at her. “I’ll call you one of those three names”.

She nods again. Doing the thing she does best, she walks away without a word. She’s heading towards her tent.

I start following her though a stay a few feet behind her. As I walk I realize I’m smiling. I don’t know why… I have no reason to smile besides the sweet taste of the apple. I’m in an unknown place and am currently an outsider. Everyone here hates my guts… well not everyone.

I look at brunette. She’s why I’m smiling.

I look at my hands. “Clarke”, I whisper. “You made a friend.”

My happy feeling and smile are quickly wiped from my face when I walk into the tent. Standing by the tent entrance is cat eyes, the red head, from a day ago.

“I made dinner”, she smiles at both of us but her smile is directed towards brunette. 

I look around the tent. To my right midnight hair is grumpily sitting on the couch. When she spots me a look of confusion comes onto her face. 

“Come, come”, cat eyes says. She seems oblivious to all the negative energy directed at her. “Let’s all enjoy dinner together.”

“Costia”, brunette walks over to the table, eyeing the as she does. “Why are you here?”

“Can I not see my girlfriend?”, Costia plants a kiss on brunette’s face. Although this is usually a romantic gesture I’m sure it was meant to affect me somehow. As she plants another kiss her eyes stay on me. 

I see everything that’s happening through the corner of my eyes but my main focus is the map on the coffee table in the living room. I wonder what they are doing that involves a map.

Costia huffs and calls everyone over again. Slowly Luna and I make our way to the table where an awkward dinner begins. I know I have no room to talk so I don’t say anything. Also if I say one word then Costia would probably blow up.

“So”, cat eyes look at me. “Why  _ are _ you here?”

_ So she hates me. _

I keep my eyes on my food. No answer is the best answer.

“I asked you a question.”

“Ok”. I look at her. “Are you not the one who called me over to the table?”

“You know what I mean”, she growls.

“Suppose I do… but suppose I don’t.”

“In this camp!”, she snaps. “Shouldn’t you be destroying land with your people?”

I shrug. I want to say something rude and snarky about her people but I know that would offend brunette and midnight so I keep my answer at a shrug.

“You’re a spy huh?”

I don’t respond.

“I know, you’re supposed to win Heda over.”

“Win?”

“You know, romantically woo her. Mate her”. She leans forward. “Fuck her.”

I hold back a smile as I shake my head. “Trust me. I have no intentions of… fucking your leader.”

“Really?”

I nod.

“So then why are you here?”

I don’t respond to that.

“Well”

No response.

Costia growls. “What is wrong with her?”, she looks at brunette.

“Maybe”, Luna glares at Costia. “She’s fed up with your bullshit.”

“Now Luna, that is no way to talk to Heda’s Hodnes.”

Through the corner of my eye I can see brunette is getting fed up with all this. She looks annoyed.

It only takes a few seconds for Costia and Luna to start arguing over something while brunette silently eats. 

_ How often does this happen? _

I look at my plate and come to realize I haven’t eaten anything on it. I don’t like any food on it. I recognize a few things but some things look like they belong in a horror movie.

“Hey.”

I look up. Green eyes find mine. They seem to transport me into a world of my own. A world I like.

“Here”, brunette slides her plate over to me. On her plate there’s mashed potatoes. “Something tells me you like mashed potatoes.”

“You don’t?”, I whisper.

“Nope”, she slides my plate over to her. 

Costia looks at brunette then at me. 

“Thanks”, I whisper before beginning to eat. This seems to leave Costia at a loss for words.

Midnight leans back in her seat. She crosses her arms, “Costia, isn’t it time for you to leave?”

Costia stands up and storms out of the tent. She comes back in but doesn’t say anything.

I look over my shoulder and at her. 

Costia takes a deep breath and shouts, “fuck you Lex!” then storms back out.

I look at brunette. She sighs and starts eating like nothing happened.

Costia walks through the entrance again. “And you do this to me on my birthday?!”

_ Did I just imagine everything? _

“I advise you to eat”, brunette mumbles. “We’re skipping breakfast tomorrow.”

I look at her. How can she be so cold to someone on their birthday?

I feel a sharp pain in my heart. I know that feeling. Sympathy… I am not sympathising for that cat eyed freak.

September 12th, 5057

Just like yesterday, I wake up covered in sweat. Though this time I’ve sweated more than usual. I wipe away the sweat and look around the brunette's room. Brunette isn’t in the room as usual. I stand up and peek outside the room. Brunette isn’t in the kitchen or living room.

Turning around I move to pick up my clothes but see a set on the bed. They’re accompanied with a note. The note says, “wait outside the tent for me. Here are your clothes from yesterday. Freshly washed and all.”

Dressing quickly I run out of the tent with my sandals in my hands. Once outside I slip them on. I’m hoping I can take this free time to walk around the camp but that’s all destroyed when I see brunette talking to a guard. It’s the bald woman from when I first got here. When she spots me, she glares at me. 

Brunette waves me over without looking at me.

I walk over to them.

“Clarke, this is Indra. She is one of my most trusted guards”, brunette says. “If you need anything, if I am not there, ask her.”

I nod.

“Now then”, brunette starts walking.

I don’t follow her. I look at Indra who is still glaring at me. She takes a threatening step towards me and in a low, deep voice says, “there a problem, blondie?”

“N-no”, I run and catch up to the brunette. 

“Today”, she says. “We are going to do a few things. Nothing big but nothing too small”, she stops by a pile of boxes. “They are supposed to be distributed evenly among people. However, families are all over the place so try not to give two boxes to one family. If you do then one family won’t get a box. You’ll have to talk to them to find their houses or which box to give to them”.

Brunette hands over a list. “Go up to someone, ask their name and how many they have in their family… or living with them at the current moment. As they give off the names of everyone in their family, you’ll want to cross it out so you know who you talked to.”

Brunette turns to the boxes. “The smallest boxes are for families that have one or two people. Next size is two to five. Then five to ten. Then the biggest are ten and up. There are quite a few people who have ten up since survival rate is pretty low so-”

“Have as many kids as possible in hopes one makes it. Yes, yes I learned this in science.”

Brunette looks at me. “Smarter than I thought… since you know it all started.”

I tilt my head. “So I write the box size under the name?”

She nods.

“And”, I look around. “I… I do this alone?”

Another nod.

“Ok”, I whisper. I walk away from the brunette. Taking a quick look at the list I decide to start with an elderly woman. Doing this brings a smile onto brunette’s face. “Um… excuse me.”

The woman looked at me. She squints at first before smiling. “Hello young lady.”

“Hi, uh… may I ask your name?”

“Oh, Mazalle.”

I flip through the list until I find her name. “May I get the name of all the people that live with you?”

“Oh”, the elderly woman takes a seat on a stool. “Sit, sit.”

“That’s o-”

“Sit.”

“Ok”. I take a seat by her.   
“It all started… I wanna say 50…”, she trails off before shouting “Harold! How old am I?!”

“You’re 79!”

“Yes, it all started 59 years ago. You see I was a young lady, very active and quite gorgeous”, she smiles. “But I was-”   
“I hate to interrupt but can I just get the names?”

“Well aren’t you rude!”, she glares at me. “Kids your age ar-”

“Ok, ok. I would love to hear the story. Will you please continue?”

“Now where was I?”

“It a-”

“Ah, yes. It all started 59 years ago…”

I turn to look at brunette. She’s holding her head in her hands making me think she’s not paying attention. I sigh in relief then I see her shoulders are shaking.

_ She’s laughing at me?! _

“... man did Ron have a huge dick”, the old woman says.

_ Where are we in this story? _

**********

“... and now it’s just me and my husband Mac.”

“Harold!”, a man shouts from inside.

“Yes, Harry.”

“Harold!”, he shouts again.

I look at all the names I crossed off. “You mean… all these people aren’t currently living with you?”

“Oh no, they moved out years ago.”

Groaning, I write a two under her name. “Thank you for telling me that amazing story”, I stand up and walk away. “Although it was pointless”, I whisper.

I head over to brunette who is lying on the boxes. “You’re done?”

“With that old lady.”

“The whole camp”, brunette points to a spot. “People walk by that place the most.”

“Whole camp?!”, I look around. “I just spent two hours listening to a pointless story!”

Brunette shoes me away. “That’s not my problem.”

Growling I walk over to the spot she pointed at. “Um, excuse m-”

“Not now.”

“Ma’am-”   
“Talk later.”

“If I-”

“Leave me alone.”

“Would you-”

“Bug off.”

“I just need a name”, I mumble to myself.

Behind me I hear the brunette whisper, “this is gonna take some time”.

Hearing those words I decide to not let my hopes go down the drain. But I’m tired so I take a seat on the floor. I look at the brunette. She has one arm draped over her eyes as she lies on the boxes. A group of girls run up to her and start asking questions which brunette answers tiredly.

I’m about to say something to her when I spot midnight leaving camp. I wonder where she’s going but I don’t have time to catch up and ask when a man rudely says, “out of my way kid”.


	11. Chapter 11

********

(Raven’s POV)

My guess on the time right now would be 10pm. The sun is long gone and the moon shines bright above me. The night is colder than usual, or maybe I just never notice. 

I really wish to be relaxing in bed or be asleep by now but I have to do a late night patrol with a group of soldiers. Although this isn’t a search party Abby had me come along thinking Clarke, if she was in the area, would approach me. How ridiculous of a thought that was. I wanted to say “that’s a dump idea” or “how stupid can you be?” but I didn’t dare say so. I don’t need to be kicked out of camp.

“Hey”, I walk up to Lincoln. “I have a feeling Clarke would approach me if I wasn’t near your group. I’m going to go that way.”

Lincoln nods.

I quickly move and separate from the group of soldiers. As I head deeper into the forest and actually take in my scenery, I can see what Clarke was so amazed by. This place is gorgeous. From the variety of flowers to the vines that make a feeling of mystery to the exoctic animals that look at you with curious eyes. Everything is so unique and beautiful… has it’s ow-

“Ah!”

**Sploosh!**

I stay still for a few seconds as I take in what just happened. I was walking… then falling and now… I’m in mud.

“Way to go Raven”, I whisper to myself. I try to get out of the mud. With each moment I sink further into the mud.

“God dammit!”, I growl at the moon. Even though I continue to sink I keep trying to get out of the mud.

“Hold still”, a sweet voice says to me. 

Her voice seems to flip something inside me. A weird feeling comes from my chest but I push it aside since I have bigger problems.

“Lincoln?”, I look around.

_ Lincoln? Nah, that voice was too feminine. _

Ahead of me in the shadows I see someone move.

I hear a deep growl, not from them but from me. But I didn’t make a noise… something inside me did.

_ Am I dying? _

They come closer only to stop for a few seconds before walking out of the shadows. It’s a woman with short blue hair and brown eyes. By the look of it she appears to workout or keep her body moving. Her beauty leaves me speechless.

**_“Mine.”_ **

A voice that’s not mine sounds in my head.

The woman takes a quick look around before approaching me. She carefully looks at me. When that’s done she reaches out towards me.

I don’t move.

“I’m gonna help you.”

**_“Mine.”_ **

_ It’s back… but what is it? _

I reach out and take her hand. With a strong pull she pulls me out of the mud and onto land. I flop onto the ground to catch my breath and think things over. 

Ok, I fell into mud. I was saved by a gorgeous woman… and now? Well now I’m hearing a voice.

I look at the woman. “Thanks.”

The woman doesn’t respond. She helps me up. I think she’s going to run off but she grabs my elbow and leads me further into the forest. When she touches me something seems to run around inside me. A feeling of joy and success erupting from that spot.

I don’t protest being led by a gorgeous woman but as we got farther from my camp I began to worry.

_ Am I gonna be a prisoner? _

She lets go of my elbow when we’re at a stream. “You can wash the mud off you”, she moves over to a rock and takes a seat.

I step into the stream and start scrubbing the mud off me.

_ Say something. I should but I shouldn’t. _

**_“Talk!”_ **

I only have an arm clean of the mud when the woman says, “you’re Skaikru?”

“Mhm.”

“You’re searching?”

“Mhm.”

A deep growl comes from the thing in my body.

**_“Worthless!”_ **

_ Ouch. _

“I saw your people… they make very much noise.”

I don’t respond to her instead I think over her sentence and come to one conclusion: english isn’t this woman’s first language. “Yes”, I say. “My people are… they make very much noise.”

Through the corner of my eye I see the woman nod. She hugs her legs to her chest and says, “this person you are looking for… they must be very special if you’re willing to look at night.”

I stop washing the mud off and look at the woman. “How do you know it’s a person we’re searching for?”

I don’t get a response from the woman. She looks me in the eyes as to say something through her eyes. 

“Raven!”, someone shouts. 

The shouting makes the woman tense up. She looks around as she’s suddenly on guard. Turning away she quickly climbs up a tree and goes into hiding before she can be found.

I look up at the tree hoping to see the woman but I don’t. It’s as though she’s not there… is she? I step out of the stream and towards the tree when Lincoln walks through a bush and into view.

“There you are.”

“Uh… hi”, I look at him.   
“Everything ok?”

“Peachy.”

“What happened to you?”, he motions to my muddy clothes.

“I fell.”

“Right… well finish washing off then we’re going back to camp.”

“Yes sir”, I walk over to the stream. With one last look at the tree I start washing off.


	12. Chapter 12

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“You’re finally done?”, brunette jumps off the boxes.

I don’t get to respond as a big yawn interrupts me. I hand over the list and stretch my arms. 

“Everything seems right… now we deliver the boxes.”

“Huh?!”

“Yeah, delivery. They’re not too heavy”, brunette looks at the boxes. “I believe you… somewhat.”

I stare at the boxes then look at the night sky. “Whatever”, I sigh.

“I’ll deliver boxes”, someone says. Midnight walks into the camp.

_ She’s finally back from wherever she disappeared to. _

“You’re not tired?”

Midnight shakes her head. She walks over to brunette and places a quick kiss on the cheek. “You can go sleep blondie”, midnight mumbles.

“I have a name.”

She absentmindedly nods. It seems she’s lost in some other world.

I turn away and start walking towards the tent.

“Hey, Clarke.”

I look over my shoulder. “Yeah?”

“Your people”, midnight says. “They’re out looking for you.”

Brunette continues looking over boxes but she’s looking at me through the corner of her eyes. I wish it was easier to read her. I have a feeling she hides a lot of things behind those eyes. 

“Yeah… I uh, I assumed they were.”

“It was a big group… seems someone wants you back.”

I close my mouth deciding it best to keep quiet.

Midnight goes back to putting stuff on boxes. Although she comes off as hating me I can see a small smile tugging on the corner of her lips. I wanna know if this is aimed at me or someone else. Something is amusing to her.

I turn back around and head into the tent.

“Ugh”, I drag my feet into the brunette's room. When I walk in an alarm goes off in my head. Something is off.

**_“Bad.”_ **

I walk around the room trying to find the source of my worries. There’s a strange scent… familiar. I walk over to my other set of clothes. I dig through it and find my shirt missing.

September 13th, 5057

I wake up covered in sweat again. It doesn’t seem to surprise midnight and brunette. Midnight leads me to the private shower rooms where I take a shower. However, when I step out from behind the shower curtains Luna is nowhere to be seen. In her place stands Brunette who is looking right at me.

Upon seeing me she looks to her right and coughs.

“B-brunette?!”

“You take long showers”, she tosses a towel at me. “Cover up.”

I wrap the towel around myself. I walk over to the pile of clothes on a stool. It’s the first clothes I was given on my first day here. “Are we doing something different?”

“Today?”

I nod.

“Yes”, brunette turns her back to me.

“Um…”

“I replaced the shirt. I noticed it was gone.”

When I’m dried off and dressed I follow brunette out of the shower rooms. She hands me a plate with food on it.

“You didn’t eat.”

“Thanks”, I whisper. I move over to a log and take a seat. As I’m eating, brunette walks over to me. She stands by me as she waits. 

“What… may I ask what’s going to happen today?”

Brunette shrugs. “Nothing is planned for today”, she says. “I, however, figured you would wish to learn something.”

No response.

“You only know English?”

“Yes.”

Brunette looks down at me. “Would you like to learn another language?”

I think for a second before looking up at brunette. Smiling, I say, “yes”.

Brunette looks away and at something in the distance. “Figured”, she mumbles.

I set my plate down and stand up. I quickly brush my clothes off and turn to the brunette. “Where to?”

Brunette does what she usually does. No response and starts walking. I start following behind her. “Clarke.”

“Yeah?”

“You may want to put your hair up.”

“Alright… do you have things I can do that with?”

Brunette stops walking. “Worthless”, she mumbles.

Brunette comes to a stop. She walks around me so she’s behind me. I can feel her grabbing my hair and doing something with it.

As she’s braiding, many people walk by wondering why she’s touching me. 

“There”, brunette walks past me.

We go back into routine which is a silent walk. I stay close to brunette hoping I won’t get poked or anything as I walk by people. I do still notice the dirty glares and whispering as I walk by. Though a few kids offer me a smile and a wave.

The people who were whispering about me a day or two ago run up to the brunette. 

“Heda!”, one squeals.

“Anna”, brunette responds.

“You look as lovely as ever Heda”, a blonde says. The brunette doesn’t respond to her so she tries a different tactic. “You know… if blondes are your taste. I’m right here”, she winks.

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

This makes the blonde’s face heat up. Her friends squeal and the three of them run off. 

That was strange. Are they always like that?

“W-”

“Don’t”, brunette shoots me a glare.

I decide to stay silent for the whole walk. I don’t care if I’m dying to ask a question, I shall stay quiet.

Brunette glances back at me. She raises her eyebrows but doesn’t say anything. 

It’s been about 10 minutes when Brunette finally stops walking. She’s stopped in some clearing in the forest. She takes a look around before nodding. “You can learn here”, she says. 

I step into the clearing. I do the same thing the brunette did and look around at my surroundings. I find that there’s no difference here than there is any other part of the forest. 

_ Why here? _

I turn to the brunette and find she’s already sitting on the ground. She looks up at me and waits for me to sit down too.

“Isn’t that uncomfortable?”, I ask. Brunette gives me a look. 

“Do you wish to learn or not?”

“Right”, I cough. “Sorry.”

I sit across from the brunette. Noticing how close I sat to the brunette, I scoot back to give her, and me, space. 

“Ok”, she says. “I’ll start easy. I’ll point at something, say it in my language then you copy.”

I nod.

Lifting her hands, brunette points at her eyes. “Nari”, she says. 

“Na- what?”

“Nari.”

I give her a blank stare. 

“Na”, she says. 

“Na.”

“Ri.”

“Re.”

“E”, she pronounces.

“Eh”, I say. 

Brunette makes a clicking noise that I don’t recognize. She takes a quick look around and pulls out of her knife. “Gon.”

“Gon.”

She nods and points at the sky. “Skai.”

“Ska.”

“Skai.”

“Ska.”

“S… ka… i”, she pronounces.

_ S… ka… i… s… ka… i… _

“Skai?”

********

I’m not so sure how long I’ve been saying words in some random language but it’s been long. I can barely think.

“Are we done?”, I yawn.

“Last one”, brunette says. “Nari.”

“Nari.”

“Good.”

I’m about to lie down but something comes to mind. “I know I am supposed to reveal info but there is none I can think of off the bat.”

Brunette doesn’t say anything. She looks at me, her face revealing nothing. 

“But I can teach you.”

“Hmm?”

“To write”, I crawl over to her. I plop myself down by her side. “In english.”

“And that helps me how?”

“And speaking your language helps me?”

She opens her mouth then closes it. She seems to be thinking everything over. Her eyes go all over the place. “Stay here.”

I watch her stand up and check every bush and tree for something. When nothing shows up she sits by me again. 

“You got one hour.”

“What’s that?”, I ask.

“I’ll learn for one hour.”

“Perfect.”

*********

“Then you wanna bring it down”, I watch her hand move. “Perfect.”

Brunette sits up and looks at the F she made. “Perfect?”

“I mean… it’s an F…”

Brunette looks at me. A small smile is barely visible. 

“Another letter? How about O?”

“Sure.”

I grab a stick and start writing O in the dirt.

“So…”, brunette shifts by me.

“So?”

“I see apple man has taken some friendship with you.”

I glance at her. “Apple man?”

“Yeah”, she takes the stick. “The guy with apples”. She starts copying my O.

“I guess… I mean he just gave me an apple.”

“That’s more than anyone else has done”, she sits back and looks at her O. “Fo?”

“I guess… and it’s the first two letters of a word. So why ask about apple man?”

“No reason”, she looks away.

I take a quick look around. “How about I show you how to write an A?”

********

(Luna’s POV)

I walk into camp expecting for someone to yell my name, by someone I mean Lexa, but there’s no shout. Everything seems a little too calm.

_ Did she fall asleep? _

It’s not that late and Lexa never takes naps. Feeling panicked I start asking everyone if they’ve seen Lexa. Most say something about her going into the forest with the blonde. 

“Did that blonde murder her?”, I whisper.

_ She’s not that smart! _

Running into the forest I search every bush for Lexa. I’m about to call out her name when I hear someone laughing. The laughing is followed by a sharp response.

“Why are you laughing?!”

Recognizing that voice I head towards the shadows and move closer. Peeking through a bush I see Lexa and the blonde. 

The blonde is sitting next to Lexa with a goofy smile on her face. Her eyes are focused on some drawing in the dirt. Although the blonde fails to see it, Lexa is blushing. 

“You write your A’s weird”, the blonde says. 

“I do no such thing.”

“Here”, she reaches over and grabs the stick from Lexa. She writes what I’m assuming is an A. “Walla.”

Lexa snatches the stick and tries to do the same but she’s too shaky. Huffing she says, “the hour is up.”

_ They’ve been at this for an hour? Why would Lexa ignore her duties to play in the dirt with the blonde? _

“Aw, c’mon”, blondie whines. “Here”, she grabs Lexa’s hand that holds the stick. Very slowly she leads Lexa’s hand to draw an A in the dirt.

I notice the blonde is determined and focused on drawing the A. Lexa is also like that but she takes a few glances at the blonde.

I move away from the bush to think things over. Replaying the scene in my head I visibly cringe as I remember the faces made. 

“There.”

_ Lexa’s always gotten red faced when people are close to her, though she does a good job of preventing that. I’m sure… I’m sure Lexa was mad, right?” _

I look back at them. 

Lexa is staring at the letter written in the dirt. “Can… can you write my name?”

“I don’t know your name”, blondie responds.

“Right”, Lexa nods.

“But I can write mine.”

Lexa nods.

Moving Lexa’s hand the blonde writes her name in the dirt.

Lexa looks at the blonde. “Clarke.”

_ I’ve had enough of this. _

I walk out of hiding and into the clearing. “There you two are.”

Lexa looks at me. She lets go of the stick and scoots away from Clarke. She seems at a loss for words.

Meanwhile blondie doesn’t seem to acknowledge my presence. She calmly starts drawing in the dirt. 

Maybe she knew I was there… I’m gonna assume the latter due to how calm she is. 

“How long have you been there?”, Lexa asks.

“Not long”, I respond.

Clarke finally looks at me. “Eight minutes”, she stands up and brushes herself off.

“So you did notice”, I say.

Clarke nods. “It was obvious. The slight movement of the bushes gave you up… that and the fact that the light breeze suddenly stopped coming from that direction yet it was still blowing everywhere else. So something had to be blocking it.”

_ She’s better than I thought. _

“So, is it true I get to spend tomorrow with you?”

I look at Lexa who gives me a look that says, “this isn’t an argument”. “I was not told this but… it appears so.”

“Yay”, she smiles.

I look away from the blonde and towards Lexa who shrugs. Lexa says, “run along blondie. Head towards camp.”

“On my own?”

Lexa nods. 

With a careless shrug she walks off. When she’s out of earshot I say, “her people… you don’t think they’ll come looking here?”

”Nah, I hope not.”

“And why’s that?”

“They know we don-”

“No, why do you hope not?”

Lexa looks at me. “She is yet to give us information.”

“Right… so, what do I do with blondie tomorrow?”

“I don’t know. Get to know her, talk to her. Show her a few things.”

“Like?”

“You have a business thing tomorrow. Take her there”, Lexa stretches her arms.

“Bu-”   
“I have to make sure blue eyes made it to camp. We’ll talk later.”

_ That’s not gonna happen. _


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the current moment I am thinking about writing another fanfic (I got plenty of time on my hands when the weekends come along. No sports as of right now), I'm actually reading other fanfictions of this fandom, but this fanfic won't be of Clexa. I guess I'm trying to find a new fandom as all I have done is write about Clexa. Don't worry though, I am still updating this and going on with this series. Guess someone can write about a fanfic for so many years before they have to take a break.

September 14th, 5057

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

“That will be all Indra.”   
“Sha Heda”, Indra closes the door behind her as she leaves.

_ I haven’t been up here in awhile. _

I move through my room in the tower, taking each step slow and easy. The room is just like I left it. The bed isn’t made, there’s still some of Costia’s clothes littered on the ground.

“Ugh”, I move away from that section.

“Am I that gross?”, Costia walks out of the bathroom. She’s patting her hair dry with a towel.

“Why are you in my room?”

“I wasn’t aware you still use this place”, she tosses the towel to the ground. “If I’d known, then… I still would’ve used it.”

Sighing I head out onto the balcony so I can look down at everything. I can feel Costia looking at me, I know it isn’t a nice look. I’m surprised she hasn’t stabbed me already.

_ If only looks could kill. _

I look down. I’m quick to spot the blonde. She’s happily following Luna out of my tent. As they walk the blonde has a hop in every step. She’s also asking a lot of questions which is annoying Luna yet Luna answers them all.

I don’t try to hide the smile on my face.

Blonde spots me. Smiling, she offers a small wave.

I hesitate but wave back to her. This widens her smile, she nudges Luna and points at me. Luna, while glaring at me, flips me off.

Leaning over the railing I watch the woman walk off, one of them walking like a robot while the other is doing a little dance as they walk. 

“I’m still here”, arms wrap around my waist.

“Get out Costia”, I growl.

********

(Luna's POV)

"Are you always happy?", I glance at the blonde behind me.

"Are you ever happy?", she shoots back. "How can I not be happy?"

"Whatever", I grumble under my breath.

_ I can be happy. _

"So", blonde catches up so she can walk by me. "Where exactly are we going?"

"Just follow."

"Are you gonna kill me?"

"Just follow", I repeat.

"Can you not tell me?"

"I have a business deal to do! Ok?"

Blondie smiles, "sounds fun".

I look at the blonde. She's looking at her surroundings with excitement and wonder. "I saw you helping Heda."

Blonde nods. "I know".

"About that… how did you know I was there?"

"I heard you approaching us", she flashes me a quick, innocent smile. "You walk louder than you assume. Then the sounds stopped so I assumed you were hiding for a reason.”

“So what you did, was it a show or not?”

“A show?”

“Y’know, did you behave like that on purpose?”

Blonde snorts at my question.

Coming to a stop I look at the blonde with raised eyebrows.

“I just did what I would’ve done if you weren’t there".

I got no response to that.

“I think someone is waiting for you”, blonde motions ahead of her.

I look ahead of us and sure enough there's a man. He stands by a tree, an impatient look on his face. “Well Luna?”

"Maverick!", I walk over to him. Sharing a quick hug and short conversation, I turn to the blonde. "This is Blondie".

********

(Clarke's POV)

I look at the guy called Maverick. Something about him...looks nice now but-

"Blondie?"

I know I should say something, put on a smile or something but I don't know what approach is appropriate with this man. He seems guarded but also open to many things.

Offering a smile I say, "hi".

He doesn't respond. Instead he coughs and looks away at some invisible object. "Shall… shall we get going?"

"Lead the way", Luna says. When Maverick is out of earshot she leans in my direction. "Let me do the talking".

"I figured that would happen."

“And don’t do anything that would attract attention.”

I nod.

We follow Maverick into a camp. It's similar to the Trikru camp but this place is more water based. From a pond in the middle to plenty of streams cutting through camp. There's even fish, that are accompanied with seahorses, in a tank.

A woman walks over to Luna and me. "It is amazing huh?"

"Sure is", I whisper. I head over to a tank and look at the animals swimming.

The woman smiles at me and looks at Luna. When she does her smile goes away. "Got the money?"

"Yes", Luna holds out gold coins. 

Behind me the old woman and Luna start talking. If I'm hearing correctly it seems the woman is trying to get Luna to spend more gold coins but Luna won't budge.

Since this has nothing to do with me, I walk over to the pond and watch the fish swim.

"Clarke!"

"Yes?", I look at Luna.

"Get over here", she mouths.

“Get over here”, I mutter. Sulking I start making my way to Midnight hair. I’m close to her when I spot a few familiar faces in the crowd. At first I think I’m seeing things but some faces are too familiar.

"Clarke, now."

"Yeah", I stop by Luna's right side. 

The faces I saw disappear into the crowd only to resurface again. This happens a few times, every time they appear they show up in a different spot.

_ Skaikru guards. _

The guards walk person to person, asking questions as they do so. I take a look at each face hoping they aren't a big threat. Most of our guards are goofs who don’t take anything serious but one of them…   
“Shit”, I spot Lincoln in the crowd of faces. Based on the smile on his face, he sees me too.

"Luna", I glance at her. "We-"

"I know", she grabs me by the wrist. Snatching the bag and tossing the coins she starts running.

I try to keep up with her fast moving feet but she's way more athletic. I notice she isn't going towards Trikru, instead she's heading away from the camp.

"Run faster", she hisses over her shoulder.

“Gee, thanks.”

After a few minutes of running I can no longer hear the guards.

Luna lets go of my hand and slumps against a tree. "We", she pants. "Lost them. They can't navigate the forest".

"Good."

"You… you bring trouble with you wherever you go."

I look at her. “I… I know and I'm sorry."

********

(Octavia's POV)

Step after step, each step marking our failure. We were so close!

"Ugh!", I kick at a rock. "Stupid! Stupid! Stupid stupid stupid!"

_ Lincoln… _

I glare at Lincoln as we make our way back to camp. I wait for him to look at me.

"What?!", Lincoln snaps at me.

"You lost her!"

He shrugs, "she ran fast".

"Were you not one of them before?"

"Octavia", he warns.

"You can run just as fast or faster!"

"You run faster!"

I look away. "Idiot", I grumble.

From behind us Raven says, "Wells isn't that a healthy relationship."

"Shut up!"

Raven flinches. "What do we tell Abby?"

"We tell her what we know".

"We know something?"

"Yes Raven, we know something".

"Which is?"

"Floukru is where Clarke is living right now".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Floukru lives on some big boat and all that good stuff but… I kinda forgot when writing the chapter so… they live on land.


	14. Chapter 14

********

(Alexandria's POV)

_ They should be back by now. _

“Where are they?”, I whisper.

“Heda.”

“Yes Indra?”

“Do you wish for me to go searching for them?”

“That won’t be necessary.”

Luna and Clarke walk into camp. Clarke has her head down as she walks towards me and Luna storms over to me. Angrily she tosses the bag at my feet.

“Better have been worth it”, she hisses.

“I like their seafood”, I shrug. “But why are you sweaty?”

“Oh, that”, Luna shakes her head. “Do you wish to tell her Blondie or…?”

Clarke takes a big step away from Luna and another smaller step towards me. “Not really”, she whispers.

“We ran into Skaikru. We had to run from them when they saw us, well blondie, at that camp.”

“Eh.”

“Eh? Eh?!”, she steps towards me. “Le- Heda this could be a big problem!”

“Could be.”

Luna points a finger at Clarke. “That kid is causing more trouble than she is worth.”

“That may be true…”

**_“No!”, my wolf snaps at me. “No.”_ **

“But that is my problem, not yours”, I pick up the bag. “There’s still some day left. Why not show her something in camp?”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know Luna.”

“How… how about the stream?”, Clarke asks.

“Yo-”

I quickly cut Luna off. “Yes, the stream.”

“Wh- who- gah!”, Luna storms off. 

Clarke looks up at me. 

“Go on.”

She looks at Luna then back at me. She turns on her heels and follows Luna over to the stream though this time she’s not as happy.

I watch the two of them walk off. A few times Clarke looks over her shoulder and at me. 

“That was interesting”, I turn and enter my tent.

“Finally”. Costia walks over to me. She reaches up and wraps her arms around my neck. “We can be alone”.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“We’re here”. Luna makes her way to the edge of the stream, slips her shoes off, and crouches down. 

I stand by her sider awkwardly since I have no idea what to do in this situation. I wish I could walk away and go to the tent. Talk to Brune- no, not talk. Just disappear into some dark corner where I can be left alone.

“Sit”.

“Huh?”

“Sit down.”

“Oh”, I take a step closer to Luna before crouching by her.

“Water feels better with no shoes.”

“I… I’m ok.”

“Suit yourself”, she mutters. 

“I… uh, I’m sorry.”

I get a quick glance from Luna.

“For the trouble that is… figured I’d make that clea-”

“You really don’t want to be found?”

“No. I really don’t.”

She nods. “Course”.

“Yeah”, I nod. “Do you hate me?”

“That obvious?”

“So you do”, I whisper. “I don’t know what I did bu-”

“I don’t hate you.”

“Really?”

“I just get this feeling that something will happen and I don’t know how I feel about that. I’m cautious, ok?”

“I’m not dangerous.”

Luna laughs. “Yeah, I know that. Physically you are nowhere near dangerous.”

“Then why are you cautious?”

“You’re not a very good listener”, she smiles. She looks at me through the corner of her eyes. With the sun shining on her I can see a different side of her. A side that she attempts to hide. She’s gorgeous, her eyes seem to change color in the sun yet it highlights the fear they hide.

“Right… I’m Clarke by the way.”

“Ok?”

“I thought I would tell you”. I turn and look at Luna. “Introductions are how all friendships begin.”

“You’re kidding right?”

I look around. “No…”

“You have a high amount of confidence.”

“Yep.”

“Ok then”, she stands up. Holding out her hand she says, “I’m Luna.”


	15. Chapter 15

********

(Raven’s POV)

Abby points at the outline area on the map. “So, that’s where you ran off to”. She grabs a red marker and makes an X across the circled area. “We shall attack them.”

“Mrs”, I stand up. “I thought talking goes first.”

“We-”, Octavia cuts herself off. She takes in a deep breath and speaks calmly, “we did that already. They all acted as though they’ve never seen or heard of Clarke. They lied.”

_ Did they? _

“That is why we’re not talking”, Abby smiles. “Now, we shall attack Floukru in… time. Prepare the soldiers for a battle.”

“Yes ma’am”, Lincoln salutes and leaves the room. 

I look at Octavia who is studying the map with intensity. It’s obvious why she’s determined. Her brother has been kicked out of camp and the only way to get him back is to get Clarke back, though that wasn’t the deal.

“I got a bad feeling about this”, I whisper to myself. 

********

(Luna’s POV)

I step out of my tent. Slowly I close the tent flap and start making my way out of camp. 

Even though everyone in camp is asleep or should be, I walk with caution. I don’t want to have to explain things to anyone and some people around this camp are light sleepers. It’s almost scary.

Walking out of camp I head into the forest. I walk along the stream until I come to a rock. 

_ This place? _

I take a seat on the rock and wait.

**********

“Maybe I was wrong”. I reach over and pick up a rock. Carelessly I throw it into the stream.

**Plop**

“H-hello?”, someone whispers.

I quickly stand up and move to the shadows. 

_ Way to go Luna. Way to go! _

I look around the tree to see who is nearby. I can see someone moving around by the stream. They crouch down and look at the stream.

“I know you’re hiding”, the person looks up. To my surprise they lock eyes with me.

“How?”, I step out of the shadows.

“My friend and I… we “trained” one another to realize when someone was watching us. Or just close. Makes hide and seek more fun”, the woman stands up. 

I step towards her. “Skaikru girl?”

“How do you know me?”, she steps towards me. “Wait… you’re the one who saved me!”

“Shhh!”, I slap my hand over her mouth. “Things roam around here.”

“Right, sorry”, she whispers. Grabbing my hand she pulls it off her mouth.

“Why are you roaming at night Sky Girl?”

“Name’s Raven”, she laughs.”

********

(Clarke’s POV)

September 15th, 5057

Just like the previous days I wipe the sweat off my body before leaving the bedroom to go to the living room.

“Hello?”, I look around. 

There’s no one at the dining table like usual. No sign of brunette or midnight. I begin to panic.

**_“Cool it!”_ **

_ Right… _

“Ok”, I head over to the couch. “I was told about this. Something.”

September 14th, 5057

I stare at the food on my plate. I think something is moving on it but I’m not quite sure. “Hmm”, I nudge it. 

“Not hungry?”

“No, no”, I quickly shoot Costia’s question down. 

“Then eat”, she plops another spoonful on my plate. Smirking she leans forward and watches me.

I give the moving thing another nudge before setting my fork down.

_ I think I’m gonna throw up. _

“Clarke”.

“Yes?”, I look at Luna.

“As much as I enjoyed our “adventure” today tomorrow both Lexa and I have things to do.”

I nod.

“So you’ll be on your own.”

I nod again. I look back at my plate. A wiggling mass is making its way to the edge of the plate. 

“On top of that”, brunette stabs the thing. It goes still. “Don’t leave the camp.”

With wide eyes I watch as she puts it in her mouth like it was nothing.

_ Oh god. _

Current moment:

“Right, I’m alone for the day. I think for a day…”

I grab my clean clothes off the bed. Heading over the tent flap I peek out.

_ I got this. Quick, fast movements and I’ll be at the showers in no time. _

I take a deep breath and step out of the tent. I start walking but as I get further from the tent I walk faster. 

“Hey.”

I continue walking.

_ Ignore. Ignore. Ignore. Ignore. _

“Hey!”, a hand grabs my shoulder. 

I come to a stop. “I… I have th… things to do.”

“Sure you do”, the person walks around me. “Remember me?”

I look at their feet. Going up from their feet I follow their legs to their belly then to face. “Cat Eyes”, I whisper.

“Huh?”

“Nothing!”, I blurt out. 

“Right… where are you off to in such a hurry?”

“Shower.”

She smiles. “I was going there too! We should shower together.”

“I’m goo-”

“Wasn’t asking”, she grabs my wrist and starts walking. We walk through the public shower doors. As soon as we do everyone goes quiet. “Scat!”

The women wrap towels around themselves, grab their clothes and scurry out of the room.

“Wonderful”. Cat Eyes start moving through the shower room. She stops by the pool and strips off all clothes.

I turn my back to her.

“You coming in or…?”

“I uh… I don’t think you understood me earlier.”

“Get in the tub blondie.”

“I don’t like bathing with people and we… we don’t really know-”

“Get in!”

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

“Lexa! Lexa!”, two fingers snap in front of my face.

“Huh? Yes?”, I look up from my work. “Did you say something?”

“Hey”. Luna grabs my hand. “Are you ok? We can take a break from this.”

“No, no it’s fine. I was just thinking.”

“About?”

“Nothing”, I shake my head. “Nothing too big.”

“You can talk to me.”

“D- uh, do you think leaving the blonde alone was smart?”

Luna looks at my hand. Absentmindedly she runs a finger over each of my fingers. “I don’t know but I have a feeling she’ll be fine.”

“Yeah.”

“She may come back with a few bruises.”

“Luna”, I look at her. 

“I’m kidding”, she smiles. She lets go of my hand and moves away from my desk. “Can I ask you something?”

“Go ahead.”

“Do you care for the blonde?”

“Define care.”

“Like… like a mate would for his mate.”

“No”, I laugh. “No, no.”

Luna eyes me. “Promise?”

“Yes, that girl is nothing more than another person. An enemy at most.”

“Right”, she nods. “Course.”

“But?”

“But if she was nothing more than an enemy then why does she have a nickname for you?”

I don’t respond. 

“Also, why do you respond to it?”

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“Isn’t this nice?”

_ Speak for yourself. _

I look down at the water. It conceals most things but also reveals a lot. 

“Y’know”, Cat Eyes looks at me. “For someone who has been… fed right for their whole life. You have a nice body.”

I sink further into the water. “Thank you?”

“So”, she smiles. “What’s it like at your camp?”

“It’s a… it’s a camp.”

“Well I know that but”, she moves closer. “Is there constant bloodshed? Murder?”

“No…”

“Huh, thought there would be. Bummer.”

I nod. I watch as Costia gets comfortable in the water. She sighs and seems to be done talking.

Good, I need quiet. I came here with the intentions to be alone and shower but instead I’m stuck with Cat Eyes.

“I know why you’re here.”

“I’m here to shower.”

“Not here but here here. In camp.”

“Really?”

“Yes! You may have fooled my Lexa and that thick headed Luna but I know you”, she squints at me. “You’re here to seduce Lexa!”

I move away. “I am?”

“Yes”, she smiles. “I can see the way you look at her. You look so pathetic… just the type Lexa falls for. And then she plays into your game. You see, you and I we’re not very different.”

“Aren’t we though?”

“No, I too ran from my camp with the intention to marry rich. Though I failed but you… I have a feeling you’ll succeed.”

“I’m not here to seduce anyone.”

Costia glares at me. “Hmm.”

“I really should be going”, I climb out of the tub. “Thanks for uh… bathing with me?”

I quickly dry off then put on my clothes. I walk out of the shower room with no shoes on and my hair down. 

I take a look around the camp for somewhere I can sit. There’s a vacant bench near a tree but not in the shade. That spot should let my hair dry then I can put it up and enjoy my day.

I move over to the bench and take a seat. I slip on my shoes then begin to put my hair up. I’m in the middle of doing so when I realize I have nothing to help put it up.

_ Great. _

“Ok”, I whisper. I take another look around. “You’re alone. Don’t have to follow anyone… it’s just you and… you. So what do I do?”

I look behind me. There’s nothing except forest behind me. I look to my right where a group of kids are playing games. Better avoid them. I look to my left where the stalls are. I think everyone hates me over there. I look ahead of me and see streets, houses, tents. Stuff.

I stand up. 

_ If I start walking then something will come to mind. I’m sure of it. _

With that I start walking around the camp. I avoid heavy populated places and explore the less populated areas. As I’m walking by huts I get a glimpse inside. Every hut seems to have the same layout except a few are bigger than the others. I’m guessing the husbands built onto it as the family grew. 

I’m beginning to grow bored of camp but I can’t leave. Brunette said not to so that is what I will do. I will stay inside camp. 

With nowhere else to explore I head over to the stream to watch the fish swim by. I think watching them will help me relax. I mean I did find it relaxing when I watched them yesterday with Luna… although that only lasted a few minutes.

As I’m watching the fish I notice they all seem well fed. I wonder if the people around here keep them fed. Maybe that’s why they bother staying in the stream. 

“Hey! Miss!”

I look up from the stream. Standing across the stream is a little boy. “Yes?”

“Can you toss the ball to us?”, another boy points at a ball that lies in front of me.

“Uh, yeah”, I pick it up and toss it to them.

“Thanks!”, they run off and continue their game.

They didn’t say anything about me being Skaikru. Hmm… they were so nice. They didn’t give me any dirty looks or even get disgusted that I touched the same ball they now play with.

_ Maybe kids aren’t as mean as the grown ups. _

I smile and stand up. “The grown ups could learn a thing or two”, I whisper.

I head away from the stream and go deeper into the camp. As I walk people glare at me. Others pull their kids away like I might bite them or something.

I go towards the stands and start looking at what each is selling. It’s easy to look when the crowd moves away from you.

“Miss”, an old man with a graying beard beckons me over.

“Me?”, I point to myself.

“Yes, yes.”

I walk over to his stand. When I’m near a sweet smell fills the air, it makes my stomach rumble. 

“Hungry?”, he doesn’t let me answer as he turns around and starts rummaging through something. “I give you sample of my delicious food. Then you consider buying, yeah?”

“I got no money.”

He chuckles. “No problem”, he waves a dismissing hand at me. He gives a sample of his food. “You hang out with Heda, yeah?”

“Yes.”

“Them money be no problem, she rich. But for you”, he leans close. “After first buy, rest is free”, he smile. “Yeah?”

“I… I can’t let you do that.”

“No, no, no. It fine, really. It fine”, he reaches into his pocket. Rummaging through them he pulls something out. “You make Heda very happy.”

“I don’t know what yo-”

“Tsk”, he shakes his head. “Although you no see it yet, but she happy. I feel like good, good! Things happen, very good things.”

_ Obviously you don’t know me. _

“Right”, I nod.

He hands me a single rose. “But I do ask you give this to that lovely woman over there”, with a shaky finger he points to an old woman. “You do that? Yeah?”

“Yeah”, I smile at him. “You have a good day.”

“Mackle”, he smiles back. “Me Mackle.”

“Have a good day Mackle.”

By the time I’ve delivered the rose to the woman, I have eaten the sample. The food did have a good taste… I want more.

I walk over to the border and climb onto the fence. Sitting down on the first bar of the fence I let my legs swing back and forth. I rest my hands on the above bar and lay my head down.

“Miss.”

“Yes?”

“Can I put this in your hair?”, a little girl holds up a bunch of freshly picked flowers.

“It’s so pretty!”, another exclaims.

“I know how to braid”, the last one says. She gives me her best puppy dog eyes.

“I… uh”, I look at their begging faces. “Sure.”

Giggling with delight they all start braiding my hair. I ignore the trio as I look into the forest and let my mind drift to some unknown place.


	16. Chapter 16

**********

“Clarke”, a deep voice calls out to me. It tries to shake me from my sleep. It beckons me away from the light and further into the darkness.

“Clarke”, it calls. “Hey!”

My eyes fly open. I look around in panic.

“Fancy hairstyle.”

Looking up I see Luna. I don’t know why but I’m disappointed it’s her who woke me. I was hoping for someone else. 

“Kids did it”.

“I can tell”, she leans against the fence. “You weren’t supposed to go near the border.”

“I know.”

“Yet here you are.”

I mimic her words. “Yet here I am.”

Nodding Luna looks into the forest. “Do you know what time it is?”

“How is th-”

“Do you?”

“No.”

She motions to the sky, “you can tell by the sun’s position.”

“Really?”

“Well that’s how most people around here do it anyways. Though we’re slowly making things easier so some have clocks”, she sighs. “I can teach you sometime.”

“Do you want to?”

Luna looks at me. Her brown eyes seem to be trying to pierce me. See something that isn’t there. “Yes.”

“That would be nice.”

Luna nods. She looks back at the forest. Through the corner of my eyes I can see she wants to say something. She opens and shuts her mouth repeatedly.

“What is it?”, I finally ask.

“Listen”, she coughs. “Le- Heda has asked me to show you around today. Not some dumb business meetup but actually around.”

“Ok…”

“So, I figured I would walk you around the forest.”

“Really?”

“No”, she pushes away from the fence. “You will go when you show yourself worthy.”

“Worthy? And how am I supposed to do that?”

“By fighting of course.”

I smile. “I don’t fight.”

“I wanna see how you fight, that way I know how to train you.”

"Train me? I don't know how that would benefit me."

"Fighting helps everyone.”

I look at Luna. “You’re serious.”

“C’mon”, she jumps over the fence. Without another word she walks into the forest.

“Brunette said I can’t leave the camp”.

“Brunette?”, Luna glances at me.

“Y’know, Head lady.”

“Heda?”

“Yeah”, I look around before jumping over the fence. I can’t see confusion on Luna’s face. Instead I see the anger she has towards me about me calling Brunette “brunette”. “She says I can call her that”, I quickly say.

“I know… Costia may have said a thing or two”, she slows down so she can walk by me. “You two are like friends then?”

“Me and Cat- Costia?”

“No, no one is friends with Costia”, she smiles. “Though I did notice you two went into the shower room together.”

“Yeah, I intended to go alone but that happened.”

“I don’t need any more information. Your sex life is yours.”

“I-”

“I walk talking about you and brunette. You guys are friends?”

“Friends?”, I shake my head. “No, no… familiar with one another. Sure.”

Luna takes a step closer to me. In a whisper she says, “don’t lie to me blondie.”

_ Clarke. My name is Clarke. _

“I… I mean”, I glance at her. She gives me a look. “Fine, I think we’re friends.”

“Think?”

“Honestly, I hope we’re friends. Brunette is a nice person and she’s the only reason I haven’t been killed.”

“That’s what you think.”

“Huh?”

“Brunette is different with you.”

“Different?”

Luna growls. “You’re thicker than a piece of wood”, she mumbles. “Heda tolerates you a lot more than she does others. A lot more.”

“Is that bad?”

“To those that have a close relationship with her, yes. To others that don’t, no.”

“So-”

“Walk in silence”, she jogs ahead so there’s at least eight feet between us.

Doing as Luna said I start following her in silence. I want to ask about where we are off to or when I can take a rest but I don’t. I have to keep silent. I’m surprised Luna said as much as she did.

As we walk I pass by many strange plants and animals. I come to a complete stop when I see something move in the corner of my eyes. I take a quick glance at Luna to make sure she’s not looking before I head towards the creature.

I stop by a tree and look around the trunk. Standing in a meadow is a deer that is munching on the grass.

“What’s you doing?”

Out of fear I scream. The scream sends the deer running into the forest.

“I”, I look behind me. “Was looking at the deer.”

“It’s just a deer.”

“Yeah but like they’re so cute.”

“They may seem like it”. Luna walks past me and into the meadow. “But those types bite.”

“Deer don’t bite.”

“Oh but they do, they were affected by the giant mushroom.”

I tilt my head. “Giant mushroom? You mean the bomb? Radiation?”

“Yes, the radiation. If angered or threatened those deer will show their sharp teeth and try to eat you alive.”

I don’t say anything. I hope Luna is joking but she has a serious look on her face.

“I’m kidding”, she starts laughing.

“That wasn’t very funny.”

Luna takes a few seconds to calm herself. “That type of deer has two heads. They don’t even make it past a year so they mature very fast so they can reproduce before their year is up.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Then don’t believe me”, she shrugs. “Anyways, we’re where we need to be.”

“The forest?”

“Yes, we’re going to tuse this place as your training area since the real training area is being used and I don’t want you to make a fool of yourself.”

I turn away from Luna. “How nice of you”, I mumble.

I know Luna heard me but she doesn’t say anything.

From behind me I hear something growl at me. It’s not a friendly growl.

_ Please don’t kill me. _

Slowly I turn around to face the creature. In front of me stands a wolf with big brown eyes and a silver pelt. 

“Oh shit”, I step away. “Luna!”. I look around for midnight hair. “Wolf! Wolf!”

The wolf steps towards me. It’s growls have gone away as it sniffs towards me.

I grab a rock from the ground and throw it at the wolf. “Back!”. The rock hits the wolf on the head. “Stay back!”

With a whimper the wolf shakes its head. I watch as it starts mutating. It’s bones bending in weird ways and its skin tearing apart as it transforms into something else.

“L… Luna?”

Luna plops onto the ground. She reaches up and rubs her head, “you know how to throw”, she grumbles.

“Luna?”, I step towards her.

“Who else?”

“Oh my god, I was so scared. I thought I wa-”

“Can you shift?”

“Huh?”

“You can’t”, she stands up and walks over to me. She grabs my arm and lifts it up. “Sad”.

“First of all”, I pull my arm away. “It’s not sad.”

“Do you even know what it is?”

“Yes!”, I snap at her. “When I was younger my mom would tell me long stories. Very long stories about why shifting is bad and how it’s not human. Meanwhile my dad would go on about amazing stories about shifting… of course he’s never done it but he did know people that would and they seemed so free. I just can’t do it because I was never taught and I may not have the ability.”

“Continue”, Luna says.    
“Ok… Well people in my camp used to shift all the time. In fact most places were fit so you could use common things as a wolf but that was all generations ago, long before I was born”, I sigh.

“Up in space?”

I nod. “Yeah, up in space.”

Luna looks at the sky. “Hmm.”

“Anyways, my mom’s family has been ruling over my people for years or if they weren’t in charge they were on the sidelines helping. This whole taking control started with my mom’s mom’s dad’s dad and then so on. At first they tolerated the act but slowly they started taking away things made for wolves then one day they forbade the act because of an… incident. After that they saw it as dirty and gross. I don’t even think my people have the ability anymore.”

“Incident?”

“Someone lost control as a wolf and murdered my mom’s mom’s dad’s wife.”

Shaking her head Luna makes a “tsk” like noise. “I suppose that information is valuable so thank you. However, fighting as a wolf gives people many advantages that people in this forest will use. But since you can’t shift I guess I’ll have to work on your human fighting. Though I am sure at some point you’ll shift.”

“But do I want to?”

“I don’t know, do you?”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know much do you blondie?”

“Clarke”, I mumble.

********

(Raven’s POV)

“One!”, Lincoln yells. 

In sync every guard goes to a certain stance. 

“Two!”, he shouts.

“Amazing”, a little boy whispers. “Mama, I wanna be like that.”

“Shh”, the mom whispers.

I move over to a log and sit down to watch the guards train. This is the most serious I’ve ever seen them. I think they’re glad to get the attention. 

“We’re going to win.”

I look to my right where Octavia sits. She looks so confident and certain.

“And I’m going to get my brother back”, she glances at me. 

“The point of them training is to get Clarke back.”

“They wouldn’t have to train if she didn’t run away to begin with. We’re in this mess because of her. Once again everyone has to cl-”

“Do you really think them destroying a camp is gonna get your brother back?”

“Yes, we get Clarke and then Bellamy returns.”

“That wasn’t the deal”, I stand up. “The deal was Bellamy has to bring Clarke in order for him to return.”

Octavia looks away. Her eyes find the training soldiers. “So it was.”

“Y’know…”, I step towards her. “The more this training goes on the slimmer Bellamy’s chance of returning is.”

I don’t get a response.

“That means”, I take another step towards her. “By the time your brother finally realizes where Clarke is it will be too late. Everyone around camp would have got what they wanted but you.”

“They did”, she says.

I nod. “That’s not good.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Raven!”, Abby yells.

“Well… duty calls.”


	17. Chapter 17

********

(Lexa’s POV)

“Are we done here?”, I look around at all the faces. They each glance at one another before nodding. “Good, you may leave.”

One by one everyone files out of the room leaving me alone in the big room. I read over the papers one last time before leaving the room to go to my tent to check on the blonde. At least I assume she’s in there.

I take a look around.

_ I don’t see her outside. _

“Looking for the Skaikru kid?”

I turn around. “Yes.”

Costia eyes me. “Hmm… well she left with Luna.”

“And you’re willingly telling me this, why?”

She shrugs. “Just felt it necessary.”

“What do you want?”

“Nothing”, she turns away. “Yet”, she adds before walking away. 

**_“Bitch”._ **

I don’t dwell on what Costia meant by “yet” or why she was so willing. I head off into the forest. As I walk I can feel the anger boiling up inside me. It’s almost painful.

_ She had one order! Stay inside the camp. And Luna of all people led her off! Ridiculous, when I find them I make them lick toilets clean. _

I pick up a sweet scent that has to be the blonde’s. I’m surprised at how easily I can follow the scent. If it was a pheromone scent it would be different but this is her natural scent. I think.

I have a feeling this has something to do with my wolf.

Allowing my mind to drift I go in search of my wolf inside me. It doesn’t take much to find her, she’s always in the same spot. She sits in front of a cave staring at something in the distance. She’s lost in her own world, droop drips from its mouth as it dreams about something.

Now that I think about it I’ve always been able to “smell” the blonde, no matter where she wandered off to. The kid’s scent was always above everyone’s else’s.

I remember rumors and childhood stories as to why this would happen. Most of these stories end with the same conclusion: you are meant to be mates.

“Mate with a Skaikru?”, I scoff. “No way”.

**_“We’re here”._ **

I look up. Ahead of me is a meadow. A small meadow hidden in the forest. In the middle of the meadow is Luna who is eyeing Clarke’s fighting form. 

Luna spots me. “Heda”.

“I thought you were showing her the forest”, I walk over to them. When I get close to the blonde, my nose fills with the sweet scent the blonde carried around with her. It’s like wild strawberries or fruit. Maybe cookies.

Though one smell ruins all the sweet ones. A faint, almost invisible smell. A spice like smell. A smell I strongly hate. 

I look at the blonde. “You were hanging around Costia?”

_ That came out harsher than I thought. _

Clarke glances at me. “Maybe.”

“They bathed together”, Luna smiles.

I give Luna a look. “Really?”

“Really”, Clarke looks at me. Her ocean eyes find mine. I can tell she’s trying to read my eyes but she isn’t getting anything. But then she smiles. “Don’t worry, it didn’t lead to anything”.

“Why- who…”, I try to look away so I can get my emotions together but my eyes stay on her. Something likes the view I am getting and I know what that is.

Inside I can feel my wolf pacing back and forth. It’s relentless to make something happen.

Finally looking away I use my foot to nudge Clarke’s foot back an inch. 

“Know that I was gonna show her around but I thought fighting seemed more valuable.”

“And how is that going?”, I ask without looking at Luna. I reach out and lower Clarke’s fist so it’s closer to her face.    
“Not well.”

“So I can see”, I tuck a stray hair behind Clarke’s ear. “Now you can see.”

“Thanks”, Clarke flashes me a quick smile. She opens her mouth like she wants to say something.

“That’s enough”, Luna steps between us. “Don’t we all have things to do?”

Clarke perks up. “I’m starving”.

“I could go for some food. Luna?”

“Will I be a third wheel?”

“Third… wheel?”, I tilt my head.

“Get that smile off your face and I’ll come.”

I look away. “Didn’t know I was smiling.”

“I wonder what Costia is cooking”, Clarke pats her stomach. 

********

“She’s not here”.

“Are you sure”, Luna asks. “Look again.”

“I’m sure”, I turn away from the tent.

“Bummer. I was so hungry”, Luna starts pouting.

Nervously Clarke kicks at a rock.

“What is it?”, I ask.

“Well… I think I know a place where we can eat”, she glances at me. 

I wait for her to continue. When she doesn’t answer I say, “take us there”.

Clarke bites her bottom lip. She seems to be thinking about what to do next. Finally she nods.

I stay a few feet behind the blond as we walk. Luna stays back with me.

“You don’t think this is a trap?”, she whispers.

“To get food?”

“Yeah”, she nods. “The blonde did have the whole day to herself…”

The blonde stops in front of a stall. “We’re here.”

“Ah”, an old man smiles at Clarke. “Pretty lady back”.

“Hi Mackel.”

“You bring friend too.”

“Mackel”, I nod to him.

“I know what you want”, he smiles even wider. He puts some cake on the table. The cake moves like jello. “This?”

Clarke doesn’t respond. She stares at the cake with intensity. Her eyes are lit up as she licks away drool.

“Apparently”, I sigh. “How much?”

“Two fifty for each piece sold.”

“Sure”, I hand over the money. 

Clarke takes her piece. She moves the plate around to make the cake wiggle on it.

The three of us head over to a table to eat. I’m about to start eating when a question comes to mind.

“Clarke.”

“Mmm.”

“How’d you find out about Mackel’s shop?”

Clarke looks at me. “I had a whole day to myself… I got hungry”, she shrugs.

“I am glad you found this place but”, I poke at the cake. “Next time don’t go into the shopping area alone.”

“I won’t.”

“It’s dangerous enough as is but it’s more dangerous if you’re alone and everyone in the camp wants your head on a stick.”

Clarke looks away. “Sorry”, she whispers.

“So”, Luna glances at me. “Dessert for lunch?”

“Dessert for lunch”, I confirm.

Luna dives into the cake. “Mmm, I am so glad you found this blondie”.

Clarke doesn’t respond. This starts our eating in silence. I don’t mind the silence since now I don’t have to carry a conversation. As we eat I watch the border and try to notice any movement along the border.

“Heda? Do you see something?”

“No”, I shake my head. “I just got this feeling.”

*********

The tent flap moves as Clarke walks into the room.

I look up from my book to look at her.

The blonde is wearing shorts borrowed from Luna and a tank top. Her hair is slightly wet from her last minute shower. 

I watch as the blonde sets up her “bed” for the night. She’s smoothing out her blanket when she looks at me. I can feel my face heating up so I raise the book to hide some of my face.

“What’re you reading?”, she gets up and approaches me.

“A… a book.”

She smiles. “I know that”, she sets a knee on the bed and reaches out. “May I?”

I let her take the book. She looks confused as she looks at the book. “You don’t understand it do you?”

She shakes her head. “No…”, she hands the book back. 

“That’s ok.”

The blonde gets off the bed and goes back to hers. 

“You’re welcome to sleep on the couch. It’s way more comfortable.”

The blonde shakes her head. “I… I uh feel more safe here.”

“Ok”, I set the book on the bed and lie down. “Whatever makes you comfortable”, I blow out the candle that lights up the room.

I stare at the ceiling as I listen to the blonde move around her bed. I wait until I hear the sigh the blonde lets out before she falls asleep. When I hear the sigh I close my eyes and let sleep take over.

September 16th, 5057

_ God. _

I roll onto my stomach and push my face into the pillow.

_ Five more minutes. _

A weird noise prevents me from going back to sleep. It starts out with heavy breathing that turns into groaning that turns into whimpers. I’m familiar with this noise so I know it’s the blonde. I am yet to figure out what to do when the blonde does this so I lie in bed and listen.

“No”, the blonde whimpers.

_ What could she be dreaming? _

I open my eyes and look where the blonde should be. I can’t see her but I see something moving in the corner.

I get this strange feeling when I see the blonde like this. All stressed and tired. It makes me unable to sleep yet I desperately need to go to sleep. 

_ What was it Luna said? _

September 15th, 5057

Walking out of my room I stumble into the kitchen and onto a seat.   
“You’re awake”, Luna flashes a smile over her shoulder.

“Yeah”, I yawn. 

“You don’t look so awake”, Luna tilts her head. She turns around and leans against the counter. “Hmm.”

“Yeah, let me get dressed”, I disappear back into my room.

As I walk around the room I take slow and careful steps as I try not to wake the blonde up. She has finally stopped moving in her sleep and is peacefully sleeping. If only she was like this at 2 in the morning. 

A maid bursts into my room. “He-”

“Shhh”, I quickly cut her off. Walking over to her I take the clean clothes from her. “Thank you”.

The maid nods and leaves the room. I move over to the bed and lay the clothes out for the blonde before I leave the room.

Luna bursts out laughing. “You look horrible”, she chuckles.

“Thanks”, I snarl. I put my hair in a braid. “Ready to go?”

“I am… but are you?”, she smiles.

I growl at Luna before I leave the tent. Luna follows behind me. “You haven’t been looking too well recently”.

I ask, “ok?”

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing big. I just haven’t been getting a proper sleep in days.”

“Oh, sounds rough. Why?”

I glance at Luna. I read her expression then body language. “Loosen up”, I nudge her shoulder. “I’m not in any danger.”

“Right…”

“The blonde has nightmares.”

“She’s that noisy?”

“Meaning?”

“You sleep through anything”.

I push Luna’s shoulder. “Do not.”

“You do”, she smiles.

“To be honest it seems like the blonde is fighting something off every night. She twitches in her sleep and whispers “go away” or “stay back”.”

“Interesting. Why not have her see Nico or something?”

“Nah, I don’t think she would talk to him.”

“Then handle it yourself. You’ll have to figure out what is causing the nightmares then get rid of it.”

September 16th, 5057

I lie back down and stare into the dark. The sounds of the blonde groaning echo throughout the room. 

“Later”, I whisper. “La...ter”.

*********

In the end I didn’t get much sleep. The blonde had one nightmare after the other. At some point she woke up and sat in her corner until sunrise which was a few minutes away. If this continues we’ll both be sleep deprived.

“Heda.”

I lift my eyes away from my cup of coffee. I’ve never liked coffee but if it keeps me awake then so be it. “Yes?”

“The greeting party for the clan leaders.”

“Huh?”

“The designers want to know if you like the set up so far.”

“Right”, I look away. “Indra?”

“Yes?”

“Do I have anything going on for the next two days?”

“Well tomorrow is the party then the next day you have the meetings. One is with all clan leaders.”

“Cancel them”.

Luna looks at me. “Cancel them?!”

“Yes, that is what I said”, I set my cup down.

“Are you-”

“Clear my schedule for the next two days”, I growl.

“Sha Heda”, Luna nods. She looks at Indra.

“I’ll have to get the word to the leaders”, Indra leaves the room.

“Lexa”, Luna looks at me. “What are you doing?”

“I am going to get a good night’s sleep”, I stand up. “Now, I have certain things to do so I can ensure that good night sleep”. I leave the building to seek out the blonde. Wherever she may be hiding.

I head straight to the tent and look in.

_ Not in the tent. _

I look around. “Maybe Mackel?”, I whisper. I look in the direction of the stands. Mackel’s store is crowded with people. “Definitely not there”, I turn away from the tents and head towards the one spot she could be. 

Opening the door I walk into my private showering room. I can hear a shower running so Clarke must be in here. I silently close the door behind me hoping not to freak her out. 

“Cl-”. I can feel my eyes widen as I stare at the woman in front of me. She has her back to me as she stands under the shower head. Her blonde hair shining gold when the sun touches it. 

I force myself to turn away from the blonde. I cough to let the blonde know I’m in the room.

“Brunette”, the blonde says. “I, uh, thought you had stuff”.

“So I did.”

“Did?”

“Yeah… I cleared my schedule.”

The shower turns off. I can hear the blonde walking around. “May I ask why?”

“I thought I would spend some time with you. Talk.”

“You can turn around.”

I turn around. The blonde is already dried off and dressed. 

“So”, she does a little hop and walks over to me. “Where to?”

********

(Octavia’s POV)

“Again!”, Lincoln shouts. 

Flinching I move away from him. “Stop yelling in my ear”.

“Sorry, what was that?”, he spares me a glance before shouting again. “Again!”

Huffing I move away from him. I’m walking over to a log where something in the forest catches my eyes. It’s a deer peeking around the tree. It watches the guards practice attacks. Prey so close to the predator.

I walk over to the fence and stare into the forest. 

_ Has Bellamy eaten? _

A million questions swarm around in my head about Bellamy. For the first time in ages I’m worried sick about him. I want him to be safe but I can’t help him. I’m stuck in here and he’s out there. I have to help him.

“I need my brother back”, I whisper.

I look over my shoulder. Looking past Lincoln I see a pile of supplies sitting in the shade. I know there’s a map somewhere in those supplies. Upcoming plans.

_ If he’s aware of everything then he could get a head start. I could help Bellamy. _

I look back at the forest. “Now how do I get out?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't say for sure if there will be an update tomorrow. Stuff came up. I'll try and and update but if I don't then here's a "I'm sorry" in advance


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very, very late update. I am so sorry. Things got busy and I was almost going to not update but figured I'd do it. So... yeah.  
> ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

“So, you already know the stands. Obviously that is where most go to eat”, I point at the stands. “Though today is crowded for some reason. There are a few huts around here that serve as dining areas”, she glances at me. “Those places have great food.”

The blonde doesn’t respond.

“At, uh, at least I think they do”.

I don’t get a response to anything I’m saying. 

_ Is she even listening? _

I look at the blonde. “Which one?”.

Two big blue eyes stare up at me. They have a look of wonder and amazement that always seem to be there.

The blonde gives a small shrug.

I look away from her and at some children playing by the stream.

“You ok?”, the blonde asks. 

“I’m fine.”

“We should eat at that place”, she motions to a hut. “It’s not very crowded.”

“If that’s what you want”, I lead the blonde over to the hut.

At the counter is a man with a shaved head. He has a long, bushy beard. “What’s up Lex?”

I shrug. “Nothing much, you?”

Zane shrugs. “And who is this?”

I turn to look at the blonde. She takes a small step towards me and doesn’t answer Zane.

“We’ll get the usual”, I say to Zane. 

“And you?”, he asks the blonde.

“Uh… what she’s getting.?”

“Alrighty”, Zane nods and disappears into the hut.

Once we find a seat a silence falls over us. I’ve always hated starting conversations so I stay silent and wait to see if the blonde wants to start one but she seems happy with the silence.

A few minutes have passed when Zane brings our food over. “Enjoy”, he smiles.

_ Ok… time to do what you hate most. _

“So”, I begin. I cautiously push my food around on my plate. “Why did you leave your camp?”

Clarke pauses for a second before eating a spoonful of her food. “I didn’t like it”, she shrugs.

“But why?”

Another shrug. “Just didn’t like it.”

M’kay, it’s obvious the blonde doesn’t want to talk about that stuff. Seems she has a wall around that topic but I can’t help wondering why. If that topic is why she has her nightmares then I have to find out more about it. For the sake of my sleep and sanity.

_ Maybe something traumatic happened in that camp? _

Eyeing the blonde I read her body language. She comes off as worried about saying anything. Like the thing she has to say would be life changing or just something she isn’t comfortable with saying. Maybe she will get ad.

_ She won’t talk about anything. _

I take a quick look around. “I once ran too.”

Clarke doesn’t respond.

“It may seem like it but this camp isn’t my original camp. In fact when I first got here it was all trees.”

“Really?”, the blonde glances at me.

“Yeah, my birth camp is far, far in that direction”, I motion to my right. “It’s where my family is and people I grew up with. It was years ago when I had enough of my camp and left. I didn’t know where I was going but I didn’t want to stay.

That’s when I found myself here. I refused to leave for obvious reasons and my parents sent out people to watch over me. They built tents and made the place like a small town.”

“That’s how this place came to be?”I nod. “Yep. Slowly as my original camp got a bigger population more and more people started coming over here. First it was old couples then came young couples then families then pregnant people and so on.”

Clarke looks away from her food. “I… uh well I have no real reason to leave my camp”, she glances at me. “I just felt suffocated in there I guess. My mom is a really important person in that camp and she expected me to be the same as her one day.”

“And?”

“And… and I shouldn’t have left”, she sighs. “I knew if I left then she would try to find me even if she had to burn down villages and murder people.”

I don’t say anything. She wants to say something more. 

“But… I thought of myself and ran”, she looks down at the table.

“So why not go back?”

“I’d rather die in the forest than go back. Not because I hate that place but because of what she’ll do. I’ll never see the light of day.”

_ So this could be the reason for her nightmares. But how the hell am I supposed to fix that? _

“I’m sorry.”

“For?”

“Telling you all that. It wasn’t your burden to bear.”

“Burden?”

She nods. “I’ll take the plates to the counter”. Before I can respond she has the plates and is already walking over to the hut. Once over there she sets the stuff down and starts walking back. Midway some man stops her with a smile.

**_“Apple man”, my wolf growls._ **

He has a sick smile as he talks to Clarke. It’s not a concerning smile… it’s a smile like a kid who just got a sucker. He’s very happy to be talking to her.

Since Clarke is so nice she happily talks to the man. Her smile only makes his smile widen even more as they dive into a conversation.

Bringing my eyes away from the blonde I look at the man’s hands. He’s sneaking them closer to Clarke’s thighs. Eyeing his pants I see a slight bulge.

_ He’s small. _

**_“Not the point!”, wolf snaps. “Mine! Mine!”_ **

**Well, she isn’t right now.**

I place my head in my hands as I wait for the two of them to stop talking. I can feel Clarke’s glances towards me. Maybe she wants this conversation to end but the man keeps talking or she’s waiting for me to leave. Leaning forward I hear the man ask, “would you like to go apple picking with me tomorrow?”

“Where?”

“In the forest. I know a perfect place.”

Growling I start strumming my fingers on the table. I glare at a tree in the distance. As I stare into the distance I hear a faint voice.

**_“Help”, it whispers._ **

That’s not my wolf. I can feel something inside me. It’s like some intruder seeking help, looking for comfort.

**_“Help!”, it calls out._ **

I look at the blonde who has taken a step away from the man. Her hands are tightly gripping at her pants. 

_ Something about that man… _

A strong pheromone finds its way to me. This type of pheromone takes a lot of energy to release. A dominance pheromone. The smell is coming from the man.

Having enough I stand up and walk over to them.

“Heda”, he says without looking at me.

“Clarke”, I place a hand on her shoulder. “I think we should go.”

Clarke slowly nods. “Yeah…”

**_“Get Back!”, the voice booms through my head._ **

Inside my wolf lets out a loud howl that bounces around inside me. She triggers my body to start releasing pheromones. They immediately cover apple man's pheromones.

Clarke steps towards me, her eyes trying to find mine. My eyes stay on the man who is coughing as he sinks to his knees. In submission he shows his neck as he whimpers.

“Let’s go”.

***********

Luna walks into the tent. “Hey”, she smiles.

“Hi”, I mumble.

“Ok… where’s the blonde?”

“Sleeping on my bed”. I take a seat on the couch and hug my knees. With one arm around my legs I start chewing on the tip of my nail making sure not to break it off.

“You ok?”

I glance at Luna. “Just puzzled about earlier events.”

Luna takes a seat by me. “What happened?”

“I might’ve found the cause of Clarke’s nightmares.”

“Oh? So what’re you gonna do about it?”

I look at the ground as everything around me slowly disappears. The noise slowly disappears and leaves me in silence. Furniture, walls, even Luna disappears as I’m sucked into my own world. I watch as my wolf attacks invisible things in front of me. It’s trying to release its pent up anger. I can tell she’s beyond pissed. The anger she has sizzles from the wolf and fuels my own fire that rages on behind us. Strangely enough I find that I’m just as mad as the wolf. Maybe even a little more mad than it.

I’m frustrated I can’t find the source of this anger. Maybe it’s the drama the blonde has been causing by her staying here or the man using his pheromones to weaken her. Could it be because he made a move on Clarke?”

In frustration I rip the tip of my nail off. “Ugh”, standing up I slip on my shoes and storm out of the tent. 

_ I need to breathe. _

********

(Clarke’s POV)

I grab an extra blanket and lay it on top of my other blanket. That should keep me warm tonight. 

_ But… I’ll end up sweating and heat will only make me sweat more. _

I remove the top blanket and look at my “bed”.

_ Now I’ll be cold. _

“Bru-”, I look around.

_ Where is brunette? _

I haven’t seen her since the whole apple man situation. I wonder where she went?

As I’m thinking all this over a weird feeling crawls onto me. My wolf bounces up and looks around in distress.

“I’m just paranoid”, I shake the feeling away and lie down.

September 17th, 5057

(Alexandria’s POV)

The cold air sends relaxing shivers down my spine as I walk into camp. The sun isn’t up yet so it’s quiet and calm in the camp. I can hear a few people snore as they sleep. In the distance a mom sings a song to her child.

_ Peaceful. _

**_“No”, my wolf growls._ **

Ignoring her bitchy attitude I head into the tent to get some sleep. When I walk into the room I spot the blonde who is sleeping. Sure enough she’s having a nightmare. She pants and sweats. Every now and then she’ll twitch. 

_ Strange… her nightmares are worse than usual. _

I’m heading over to my bed when I pick up on a smell. I follow it out of the tent and to the back of the tent. Behind the tent I find the apple man standing by the tent wall where Clarke would be sleeping. He’s releasing strong pheromones as he pants. 

He spots me and freezes. “H… Heda”, he whispers. “I can expl-”

I put a finger to my lips. “She’s cute, huh?”, I motion to the tent.

The man eyes me before nodding.

“I noticed that when I first met her. She caused feelings I haven’t felt before. I still don’t know what those feelings are”, I step towards him. “Sometimes I doubt she knows what she causes others to feel. But, I do know what you’re feeling.”

“You do?”

“You love her”, I take another step towards him. “You want to be her mate? You want her to look at you and only you.”

“Yes, I do.”

I nod. “I have a feeling a lot of people here want to be her mate. There’s a fertile, young Omega who is gorgeous and kind. On top of that she’s really caring. I can’t blame you.”

“So you understand?”

“Of course”, I smile. “I understand what you’re feeling completely. I understand why you would want her. But you can’t be mates with someone whose wolf doesn’t want you.”

The man growls. “I know.”

“I see so you’re trying to force it to like you at night. When the blonde can’t leave and take her wolf with her.”

He nods repeatedly. “Yes. Yes!”

Inside I hear the blonde whimper. “Shhh.”

“Sorry”, he whispers.

“Well good luck with all this”, I move as though I’m gonna walk away.

“So want to be her mate too?”, he asks.

I glance at the tent then think the question over. “No.”

Inside my wolf growls.

“Didn’t you say you had feelings?”

I nod.

“Does that not mean you love her?”

“I never said I didn’t love her. I said I didn’t want to be her mate.”

“Then you don’t u-”

“Woah, just because I don’t want to be her mate doesn’t mean I don’t understand how you want to protect her. Protect her smile and her laugh. All the cute things she does without realizing how cute they are.”

He doesn’t respond.

“Like the way she wrinkles her nose when confused or how she’ll look at everything with some amazement. The light in her eyes… the ocean that lies in them. The golden color of her hair.”

Apple man nods. “Yeah. I just want all that to myself.”

**_“Mine!”_ **

I can feel all the calm I had leave my body. I’ve come to realize I won’t get this man to forget his feelings. I’ll have to do something else.

“You see”, I step towards him. “I… I may not know my feelings but I do hate your feelings. I think there may be some jealousy in my feelings”, I take another step. “So I can not let this go on. I do hope you understand.”

“What?”

Forgetting everything I let my wolf come out. I let her do what damage she’s dreaming of. I can feel myself moving but not as a human, as a wolf. With a loud growl my wolf’s sharp teeth sink into his neck. It releases him as soon as he stops moving.

Taking control again I turn back to a human. When I step away from him I see a shirt in his pockets. I reach down and grab it. It looks like Clarke’s missing shirt.

“Asshole”, I growl.

“Heda?”, a familiar voice asks.

“Indra.”

“What ar-”

“Get rid of this body. Tell everyone some creature dragged him away at night. All that remained was an arm.”

Indra doesn’t respond.

I hold out Clarke’s shirt. “And burn this”.


	19. Chapter 19

********

(Clarke’s POV)

I step out of the tent. The warmth of the sun greets me. Along with the warmth is the noise of children laughing and running through the stream. Of course I can hear the whispers and feel the glares.

I look towards the stands. I should go tell Apple man I won’t pick apples with him. It’s the right thing to do.

As I’m heading in that direction I notice his stand is missing. There’s a blank spot where it used to be. 

“Um”, I stop a little girl. She’s one of the girls who braided my hair.

“Hello miss”, she smiles up at me.

“Where’d that apple stand go?”

“Oh you mean Frederick?”, she glances at the blank spot.

“Yeah…”

“The creature got him”, she says and runs off. She runs over to her friends to play with a ball.

_ Creature? _

I don’t know what she meant by that but I don’t want to find out. Whatever it is it has the ability to devour one person in one night. With no trace?

Since I can’t go talk to the apple man I decide to walk around the camp. I have to wait for brunette to be done with her shower. I don’t know what we’re gonna do today. It could be anything.

I stay clear of the shopping area which means no free cake. Bummer.

“Bored?”, a male voice asks. A strange smell wraps around me. It blocks all the other smells away.

I know this smell. Pheromones.

I turn around to face the person. A blonde man smiles at me. The toothpick in his mouth hangs from the side of his mouth.

“I’ve noticed you around here”, he purposely flexes his stomach muscles.

_ Who hasn’t? _

I take a quick glance at his bare stomach.

“You stick out”, he continues. “Everyone is talking about you. The Skai girl, Heda’s lover, you name it”.

A woman runs up to the man. She hands over a glass of wine. 

“Thank you sweety”, he winks at her. That one wink makes her blush and she runs off. The man takes a long slow sip of his wine. “I felt it necessary to introduce myself since you’re no longer… how should I put it? Claimed?”

“Claimed?”

“Pheromone claimed I should say. With that man dead there’s no one in my way. Now I can talk to you.”

“Man?”

He laughs. “You clueless girl. Clueless Omega”, he growls the word Omega. His tongue swipes over his bottom lip.

When he says Omega a few men look at me. They range from mated men to single men. They all stick their heads out as they take a sniff in my direction.

I clench my hands together as I look around.

“I’m Johnny by the way.”

“Cl… Clarke.”

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

“So, you got a free day”.

“No, Luna, I have a day of babysitting.”

“Really? Who? Let me guess, you have needs to be satisfied”.

“I’m not fucking anyone”, I turn off the shower. “The blonde. I have to babysit the blonde”.

“Right… speaking of which, what are you going to do today?”

“I don’t know!”, I snap. “I don’t know. I figured I would take today to figure out her nightmares.”

“Didn’t you solve that?”

“Exactly”, I quickly dry off and get dressed. “It’s whatever.”

Luna stands up from her stool. She tosses her book onto a counter. Moving behind me she uses her brush to brush out my hair. “You better think fast”.

“And why’s that?”

I can feel her fingers moving as she braids my hair into it’s usual braid. “Your lady is in trouble.”

“Not my lady”, I slip on my shoes. “See ya”. Walking out of the shower room I spot Clarke talking to a man. It’s obvious he’s trying to flaunt his stuff.

I walk up to them from behind Clarke. She doesn’t seem to notice me but everyone else does. A few people step away while others get back to work.

“Johnny”, I force a smile on my face. I notice the way Clarke freezes when she hears my voice.

“Heda”, Johnny spits out his toothpick. “Do you need something? If not, I’m busy.”

“No, no I just thought I would say hi.”

“Well you did so…”

I look down at Clarke who is frozen stiff. She has a strange reaction to me. “You don’t mind if I steal the blonde for a second?”, I grab Clarke’s wrist. “Do you?”

“I do actually. I- no we are in the middle of something.”

“Oh and what’s that?”.

“We both have a need that has to be satisfied. I am simply making moves to satisfy that need.”

Clarke slowly starts to relax. “Need?”, I hear her whisper.

“So she’s yours then?”

Johnny gives me a long look before responding. “Not yet”.

“So there’s a slim chance?”

“For you, sure. But I wouldn’t risk it.”

“Gu-”

“In that case”, I cut the blonde off. I turn her around and gently grabbing her head I move her head to the side. I eye the blonde’s neck. I allow myself to shift a fraction of the way. Just enough so my teeth have changed form.

When I look Johnny in the eyes I see fear. I understand his fear. He was heading after an Omega in a place she isn’t familiar with.

_ That’s a new low. _

Without another word I sink my teeth into the blonde’s neck. 

I can hear the blonde whimper. Her hands move to my shirt where she grips it tightly. 

“Stop that”, Johnny steps towards me.

Growling I bite down harder. This causes Clarke to cry out in pain, her nails dig into my skin through the shirt.

When Johnny steps back I loosen my grip on the blonde then release her completely. I lick at the blood that runs down her neck. In front of me Johnny grits his teeth. His glass shatters from the tight grasp and with that he turns around and storms off. Drops of blood trail behind him from his bleeding hand.

“Grumpy”, I mumble. I finally take a look at the mark. It’s fresh so it just looks like a wound. I know it will heal but the teeth marks would be a different color. Definitely noticeable. This mark will also last a few months which is not the problem. The problem is I just marked one of the few Omegas in this camp. I did it in front of everyone and out of pure jealousy.

_ Dammit Lexa! _

I take a look around the camp. A few men have stopped to look at Clarke. They still seem to have an interest in her even though she’s been marked.

A few women are looking at her in anger while others are crying.

_ What did I just do? _


	20. Chapter 20

********

(Clarke’s POV)

I look up at Lexa. I know I have a dumb look on my face as I stare at her. Carefully I reach up and touch my neck.

It hurts.

“It’s a bite mark!”

“You bit me”, I whisper.

“No”, she reaches out. Her fingers touch my neck so lightly that it feels as though she’s not touching me. “I marked you”.

“Marked me… isn’t that what mates do?”

“This was a different type of mark. Not a mating one”.

“What the hell!”, I start panicking.

Brunette is surprisingly calm. She watches as I try to rub the spot away. “Oh calm down”, she finally says.

“How am I-”, I cut myself off. I take a step back and flinch under Brunette’s gaze. Something about it has me not wanting anything to do with her.

“It’s called Omega Submission”.

She seems to notice but she doesn’t say anything about it. “I helped you”. 

Help? That’s not helping.

I look away. “Thanks”.

********

(Raven’s POV)

“Ok”, I won’t repeat this again. I repeat how to get out of the fence safely at night and during the day. I tell her how she can hide the spot so no one finds it. How she has to hide the spot.

“Ok”, she nods. “But could you repeat it?”

“No!”, I snap. I look away from her and in the direction of the stream where I’m supposed to meet up with the Trikru girl. But I can’t do that because of Octavia.

Looking back at Octavia I growl at myself. I’m pissed at Octavia but more at myself because I let her find me.

“That’s all”, I stand up.

“That’s all?”

“I said there wasn’t much.”

“I know but what about precautions?”

“Pre- what?”

“Precautions.”

I shake my head. “See you tomorrow Octavia.”

“But Raven-”

“Goodnight”, I call over my shoulder. I can feel Octavia watching me as I head over to my tent. Once inside I strip off my clothes and climb into bed. I know I won’t get much sleep. I haven’t gotten much since Clarke disappeared. 

Where are you blondie?

September 18th, 5057

Morning duty. The job I got stuck with because no one else wants to do it. Not even the old people and they want to do everything. What is morning duty? Only the worst job ever! You’re stuck babysitting the camp kids as the adults do their jobs and buy things. I don’t hate children. I just prefer the silence but they’re always loud and obnoxious. Plus I had to remember each of their names which is hard enough. I wasn’t aware there were that many kids around camp.

I am used to a few kids though. They’re my favorite out of all the kids. Like take Ron for example. He’s six years old. He’s a shy boy who stays in the shade most of the time. You can always find him reading a book and if he’s not reading he’s at the library helping Mrs. Gone. Though he can’t actually read all that well, he does enjoy pictures and sounding out words. 

I also happen to like the shade so in the morning we’ll sit under a tree in silence. That’s why I like him so much.

Ron glances at me. “This book talks about Earth.”

I nod. “That’s cool”.

Ron nods. He doesn’t seem to know how a conversation works or that it usually is more than two sentences but I’m fine with our “conversations”. His legs shake with excitement as he turns each page.

Cute kid.

I look away from him and spot Mackenna. She’s a day apart from Ron who is older. Their parents are childhood friends so they usually spend time at one another’s house. Mackenna however is the opposite of Ron. She hates sitting still and reading. She’s outgoing and quite loud. She does have manners. She also has the most beautiful dresses a little girl could own though she always gets them dirty. She likes to adventure and get messy. She also has this weird fascination with worms. 

Today Mackenna runs up to Ron with a worm. “Look! Look!”

Ron scoots towards me. “Gross”.

Mackenna glances at the worm. “Hmm”, she walks off. Her usual joyful mood now is a little blue. 

“You should talk to her more Ron. I think she has a thing for you.”

Ron flips the page and doesn’t respond.

Classic Ron.

Then there’s little Abigail. She’s Mackenna’s best friend. Abigail is a month younger than Abby. She is also one of the few kids in this camp who have gay parents. I don’t really remember how that came to be. Something about Abigail’s mom leaving her dad and her dad falling for a man. I don’t know who her mom is though. 

I have noticed how close Abigail is to Mackenna.

Sighing I look at the sky.

When kids are your only source of entertainment then you have no life.

I look towards the fence and wish I could leave but I can’t. Two reasons. I’m watching the kids and Octavia is out in the forest. I don’t know when she’ll return. Octavia said she was looking for something. She had a backpack of stuff. A bunch of stuff. 

“Mrs. Reyes!”, a voice calls out.

Ah, yes. Bumble. A blonde haired little boy. He’s Abigail’s age. He talks weird due to his two front teeth missing. 

“Yes Bumble?”

“I have to pee.”

“You peed 30 minutes ago.”

He starts doing a weird pee dance. 

Sighing I stand up. “Fine, you kids stay by the tree.”

********

(Octavia’s POV)

“This fucking forest”, I growl. I swat away the 100th mosquito. “Get back!”, I shout at a racoon. It scurries away.

I hate all these bugs and animals. Not to mention the obstacles. How can anyone live here?

*****************

I’ve been walking in this dreaded forest for about an hour. I’m well off Skaikru territory so I have to be careful. I’ve come close to a few Trikru guards. They were protecting something I couldn’t see. Maybe someone. Probably their leader.

I drag myself over to a tree to take a quick rest. Maybe eat something before I continue on my way. “Where are you Bellamy?”, I whisper.

“O?”

Turning around I see Bellamy. “Bellamy!”, I run over and hug him. “I knew you weren’t dead.”

“Of course I wasn’t.”

I eye him. “You look dead.”

“Thanks”, he chuckles. His eyes go to the bag. “Is… is there food in that?”

I nod. “All for you.”

“All of it?”

“Yeah just ration it. I don’t know when I’ll be able to bring another. And there’s some other stuff in there that I assume will be important.”

“Thank you O”, he smiles. “Thank you.”


	21. Chapter 21

September 20th, 5057

Octavia left two days ago. I had to tell Abby that a guard let her leave. Octavia said she was searching for Clarke so Abby wasn’t too upset but Lincoln is beyond pissed. He was so pissed that he shot the guard that I said let Octavia go. He murdered an innocent man.

I look up from my lap and at Lincoln. He’s pacing by the tent entrance as he nervously twirls his knife.

“You knew”, he growls when he catches me looking. “I trusted you Raven!”

I look away from him and back into the forest. Scooting closer to the fence I try to find any sign of Octavia coming back. Although I am looking for her I do listen to the kids in the background. I am still on Morning Duty.

Behind me I can hear Ron arguing with Bumble.

“You got your death food on my book!”, Ron shouts.

“It’s not death food”, Bumble says with a mouthful. “It’s a donut.”

“Exactly! You’re gonna get fat Bumble then die of diabetes or maybe a heart attack!”

“I will not!”

“Yes you will! You have more stomach than Mr. Gerald!”

Mr. Gerald. The local donut shop owner. He smells of powdered sugar. He has a huge stomach and struggles walking due to his weight. Because of this he’ll spend most of his time in his kitchen cooking up donuts and his daughter will decorate them. Weird thing is his daughter is super fit and pretty.

I wouldn’t be surprised if Bumble ended up like Mr. Gerald. Mr. Gerald is Bumble’s uncle.

Ignoring the two arguing kids I turn my attention to Mackenna and Abigail. Mackenna has a handful of bugs. With this handful she chases Abigail around. 

“Stop it Mack!”, Abigail shouts.

“Just touch one!”, Mackenna giggles. “Please.”

“No!”

Turning away from them I think about the forest. I think about Clarke and how she wanders around inside that forest. I hope she’s ok and that she is surviving. I think about the forest girl who I met at the stream. I wonder who she is. I can’t help but think about Octavia who probably found her brother by now. Then there’s me. Someone who wishes to be out in the forest. I want to get away from everything and everyone. Something about the forest is refreshing and gives you something the camp can’t.

I finally understand Clarke.

“That’s it!”, Lincoln shouts. “I’m sick of this bullshit.”

I look up at him. “What’re you talking about now?”

“You’ll see. I’m going to get Octavia back”.

I watch as Lincoln demands the guards open the gates. When they don’t he grabs one of their guns. He shoots a man in the foot and threatens to shoot the other. With shaky hands the guard opens the gate letting Lincoln.

“Lincoln!”, I call out. He ignores me as he runs through the forest. “God dammit”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it is so short.


	22. Chapter 22

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

As soon as I open my eyes I can sense something is off. It’s a different morning than the past 10 days. I sit up and look at the corner. The corner is empty but the bed is still made.

Getting out of bed I enter the living room. Luna is sitting on the couch looking at a map. She nervously chews on the tip of a pencil.

“Luna”.

“Lexa”.

“You don’t happen to know where Clarke is…”, I approach her from behind. Looking over her shoulder I see she’s looking at a map of Skaikru territory.

“Clarke?”, she whispers.

“Y’know”, I reach out and snatch the map. “The blonde.”   
“I was looking at that.”

“I am well aware.”

I look over the map to see if she marked a few things. There’s a few marks. They seem to mark the weak points of the Skaikru’s fence. “We’re not attacking them.”

“I know but if we were-”   
“We’re not”, I hit her on the head with the map. “I have to find Clarke. Good luck with this.”

I leave Luna with her map. When I leave the tent I get this feeling that Clarke is near. A quick look around reveals she’s not in my sight.

“Hey”, I stop a little kid. “Have you seen the Sky girl?”

The boy points to a hut. 

“She wants to be left alone”, a little girl butts in.

I don’t respond to her. I walk over to the tent and step behind it. Sitting in the shade is Clarke. She’s hugging her knees as she stares at the dirt.

“Hey kid-”

“Clarke”, she glances at me. “My name is Clarke.”

“Ok”, I lean against a hut. “Why are you hiding in the dark?”

She hugs her legs tighter. “Doesn’t matter”.

“It does to me. That’s kinda why I asked.”

“No it doesn’t!”, she snaps. 

_ Someone’s mad. _

“Just go away”, she whispers.

“I could do that and let you mope in the shade but I won’t. Now why are you so upset?”

“Oh I don’t know”, she says sarcastically. “Were you under a rock for the past few days?”.

September 18th, 5057

“That was quite a show”, Luna laughs. “You bit her.”

“Yes, I did”, I look at the blonde.

Next to me Clarke stands silently. Her hand carefully strokes the mark as she looks at the ground. I can’t read the look on her face.

“Man”, Luna stands up. “I’m starving. Let’s go get something to eat.”

“Didn’t you just eat?”

“Your point?”

“You’re gonna get fat”.

“I work out”.

“Not as much as you used to”.

Luna looks away.

“Up for food?”, I nudge the blonde. She lets out some weird gargled version of words.

“Food it is”, Luna starts walking towards the stalls when she stops.

I put my hand on the blonde’s waist and move her behind me. Looking at the camp entrance I wait for the approaching people to make an appearance. 

Two guards walk over to me and stand a few feet away. 

“You don’t think…”, Luna glances at me.

“No, they wouldn’t approach us like this.”

A clan leader on a horse walks into camp with her son. Following behind them are four guards with a sword each with their own sword and two archers without a horse.

The leader doesn’t seem to spot me yet.

I take the blonde by the wrist and sneak over to my tent. Pushing her in I whisper a quick. “Stay hidden”.

“B-”

“I”m serious. I don’t know what would happen if you were found”, I turn away from the tent and approach the leader. 

“Heda”, Nia smiles down at me.

I don’t respond. I look at Roan who has hopped down his horse. He takes slow and careful steps in many directions. He makes it look like he’s admiring things but I know he’s searching for something. 

“Looks like this place did some major design changes”, Nia says. 

“Why are you here?”

“Can I not come to visit?”

“I would prefer you came with a purpose. If you didn’t then please leave and stop wasting my time.”

“So cold”. She fakes a shiver.

I focus back onto Roan who has gotten closer to my tent. I can see he’s eyeing the entrance. I assume the blonde is by the entrance trying to listen.

Luna steps in front of Roan. “Can I help you?”

“This is your tent?”, he asks.

“Maybe”, she shrugs.

“It reeks of Skaikru”, he hisses. “Do you have something to hide?”

Luna smiles and shrugs again. “We may have stolen some Skaikru things.”

“Roan”, Nia hisses under her breath. “Show some respect.”

“If it is a sky person then they would only be a burden. I do hear Skaikru is missing a person and are offering a huge reward.”

Sighing, I step forward. “Why are you here?”

********

(Clarke’s POV)

Brunette has been talking to this woman named Nia for the last- who knows how long. It’s been long since the sun is already in the center of the sky.

My stomach growls loudly. Whimpering I put a hand over my stomach. 

_ I’m starving. _

“Hear that?”, a male voice asks. “Something is growling in your tent Luna.”   
“Yeah… there’s a creature in there.”

“Skaikru creature?”

“Maybe.”

I move away from the tent entrance and go into the bedroom. I know I should set up my own bed but I don’t have the energy so I lie down on the floor. Although it’s uncomfortable I know I can fall asleep easily.

*************

I wake up to the sound of talking. It’s faint but enough to peak my curiosity. Sitting up on the bed I lean forward to try and hear the conversation.

“Roan was right”, I hear Luna say. “She’s basically a burden.”

“She’s learning”, Lexa responds.

“Lexa!”, Luna shouts.

I flinch at the sudden yelling.

“The kid is useless, she wouldn’t survive one day out there. What exactly are you going to do with her?”

“I don’t know yet…”

I get out of bed and peek out of the room. Luna has her back to me but Lexa can see me clearly.

Brunette suddenly stands up and slams her hands onto the table. She stares down at Luna. “Her name is Clarke. It would do you good to start calling her that”. Green eyes look at me. Brunette sits down and waves me over. “Come eat.”

I do as she says. I sit closer to Brunette than Luna. I didn’t think Luna saw me as a burden. I thought she liked me.

_ Guess I was wrong. _

The dinner is awkward. Brunette ignores Luna’s glares. Costia showed up out of nowhere and is now chatting away with Brunette who doesn’t care. I forgot the dumb bitch existed.

Sighing, I stuff a spoonful of food into my mouth.

September 19th, 5057

“That’s not the point”, an upset Luna growls. Lexa doesn’t give her a response. Instead a weird silence falls over them.

I take a step away from the tent entrance hoping they don’t know I’m listening.

“Lexa?”

“You think the blonde staying here will lead to danger?”

“Yes. Not think but know”.

“Right but if we teach her to fight then she will be able to leave sooner”.

I take another step away. Looking behind me I try to find a way out of the tent but the only way out is through the tent entrance.

From outside Luna sighs. “I don’t know why you are so determined to help the blond-”

“Lu-”

“Listen, what attracts you is your problem and something I don’t want to hear. I don’t care. But if training is what she needs then it is what she should get”.

“I knew you would be on board”, I can hear Lexa smiling. “Come on out Clarke. You’re going to get some training”.

I take a look out of the tent. “Training? Like training?”

Neither of them answer. Instead they start walking. They both have a silent argument between them.

I run out of the tent and walk behind them. As I’m walking I notice the playfulness between them. Despite that they were just arguing they laugh to one another. Brunette even lightly nudges Luna. Luna smiles at this.

“You two are close”, I whisper.

“Huh?”

“You two are close”, I repeat. “I can tell you’ve known each other for quite some time”.

Luna eyes me. “Yeah, and?”

“Nothing”, I shake my head. “It’s nice to know you aren’t stone hearted all the time”.

I don’t get a response from Luna.

“You got close friends?”, brunette asks.

“Not friends”, I correct her. I lift my head and look into the forest. “But a friend, yes. We’re close”.

“Childhood friend?”

“You could say that. We met in an interesting way but it was when we were young. We’ve been glued to one another ever since except when they try to blow something up”, I smile.

“Must’ve been hard leaving them behind.”

I shrug. “It was but they understood. So I assume anyway”.

“I’m sure they do”.

“We’re here”, Luna motions to an empty clearing in front of us.

To the right there is a shelf of weapons. In the center a few people battle one another. A few sit at the edge cheering them on and chatting with friends.

“Training grounds?”, I ask.

“Bingo”, Luna walks onto the ground.

I follow behind her. As Luna talks to some trainer I eye the weapons. They’re neatly placed in sections. Each weapon in a certain section has a part of it colored a certain color. Section one has the weapons with green parts. Next is red then yellow then blue and last is black.

I wonder what they order these by.

********

(Lexa’s POV)

I watch as the blonde eyes the weapons. Behind her Luna is watching her gently touch the weapons. Occasionally the blonde asks a question that Luna unenthusiastically answers. She looks fed up with questions.

Grabbing her Luna drags her to the center. Clarke seems confused so Luna tries a move on her. Clarke is knocked to the ground. She lands on her back.

“Get up”, Luna says.

The blonde jumps to her feet. As she’s dusting herself off Luna does another move. This time Clarke stumbles back and trips on a rock. She falls into the shelf that stores all the weapons. The shelf wobbles at first before falling over. A few weapons break upon impact while others chip in certain spots.

“My spear!”, a man yells. He glares daggers at Clarke who is shrinking away from his gaze. “This is your fault!”, he shouts. As he walks towards the blonde I come to realize it’s Njil. When he gets too close I stand up.

“Hey!”, I walk over to him and step between them. “Back up”.

“But this bitc-”

“Watch your mouth and back up”, I look him in the eyes. “Now”.

Njil takes a step back. “Why is she here? She can’t fight!”

“Nji-”, a cold hold grabs my wrist. I turn and look at the blonde. She gives me a slight shake of her head.

_ Ok, so not fighting. _

**********

“Ok… maybe you can’t do weapons and all that”, Luna glances at me. “But I’m sure you can hunt.”

“Hunt?”, the blonde asks.

I look at Luna. I keep a look on my face that asks “seriously?”. The blonde’s eyes go from me to Luna.

“I can do it”, she speaks up. “Maybe.”

“Clark-”

“I can do it”, she repeats. She looks at me. “Please”.

Sighing I nod. “There’s a hunting party leaving right now. We’ll catch up to them.”

Luna smiles. “Wonderful”.

As we’re walking into the forest I have to constantly remind the blonde to stay focused. She’s so focused on the beauty of the forest. I do find a part of this cute but also frustrating. 

“Over here”, I whisper. I grab the blonde’s hand and drag her to a bush. Crouching I look out of the bush. “See one?”

“What?”, the blonde whispers. She does a cute head tilt.

“A weak deer”, Luna whispers. “You have to find which one to separate from the rest. Makes things easier”.

Clarke takes a look at the deer. I can see she’s struggling to find one but Luna has already spotted one. She waits for the blonde to spot the deer.

“I don’t see one”, Clarke mumbles.

Luna opens her mouth but I cut her off. “That’s ok”.

Clarke leans forward to get a better look. Upon doing so she gets a nose full of the bush. Leaning back she does a weird motion with her face. Looks like she’s trying to hold something back.

“Clarke?”, I whisper.

The blonde turns to me. She motions to her nose as she makes another face.

“Gotta sneeze?”, I ask. She nods. “Shit”, I whisper.

Luna gives me a desperate look.

“Uh”, I glance at the deer then look at CLarke. Grabbing her face I bring her closer and smash our lips together. All I need is for her to not sneeze for a few seconds then the hunt will begin.

I open my eyes and look at the blonde. Her eyes are wide but she doesn’t look like she needs to sneeze.

_ That’s good. _

Leaning in I swipe my tongue over her bottom lip. Willingly she opens her mouth a little allowing me in. I take this opportunity and snake my tongue into her mouth. At first she tries to avoid my tongue but eventually gives up. When she does she leans in and a powerful smell of vanilla surrounds me. 

“Mmm”.

When a cry is yelled out by the man leading the hunt a few people run out of hiding and towards the deer.

I lean away breaking the kiss though my hands remain on the blonde’s cheeks.

“Brunette?”

Giving her a quick scan with my eyes I plant a light kiss on her lips before turning my attention back to the hunt. The hunters should be hunting down one or two weak deer while driving the herd towards us.

Next to me the blonde looks dazed.

“Focus blonde”, Luna nudges her.

Looking back out the bush Clarke looks for the deer. She leans forward.

I can hear the deer approaching us. As they approach the blonde leans more and more forward until her nose is buried in the bush. Leaning back she suddenly sneezes scaring off the upcoming herd. They break into two as they run around the bush.

One deer however jumps up and over the bush. 

Luna attempts to get a hold of its neck but misses it by a hair. Growling she throws a lump of dirt at a tree.

The others come running back with only a baby deer in their arms. It loosely hangs as blood drips from its throat.

I shake my head letting them know we got nothing. They all break out into groans.

“We can’t survive on this!”, one snaps.

“We’ll starve!”

I don’t respond as I watch them all walk away whispering to one another. I know they’re talking about the blonde and based on her face she knows too. She has her eyes on the ground refusing to look at me or anything else.

I lean towards her trying to catch her eyes but she turns her head away.

_ Hmm. _

One man, as he walks by, says loud enough “worthless Skai girl.”

Upon hearing this Clarke hugs her legs and tries to make herself as small as possible. 

When the people are gone Luna speaks up. “Well, that was interesting”.

“Shut up”, I hiss at her. Gently nudging Clarke I ask, “you good?”

Clarke buries her face in her knees. She takes a second to answer, “you kissed me”.

_ That’s not what I asked. _

“You took my first kiss”, she looks up at me. 

“It happen- first kiss!?”

She nods.

“You haven’t kissed anyone before?”

“Isn’t that what first kiss means?”

“Well- yeah but… you really haven’t kissed anyone before?”

She nods again.

I look away from her. “Why?”, I whisper.

“Cause my lips haven’t made contact with ano-”

“No, why haven’t you kissed anyone before.”

“Why does it matter?”

I look at her. I try to read her expression. “You”, I say. “Just scared away a deer that’s herd won’t enter this territory for what, two weeks?”

“Three”, Luna speaks up.

“Three weeks. So the least you can do is tell us why you haven’t kissed anyone.”

“It doesn’t matter”, Clarke squeezes her legs.

“Does to us”, Luna sings. She smiles and leans forward. 

“I…”, Clarke scoots back. “I’ve had a few people ask me out. Just a small amount of people but I never felt anything for them so I said no. And I didn’t kiss them cause I didn’t want to be douchey or lead them on”, she shakes her head. “That just led to people hating me in camp cause I turned down their sons, daughters”, she sighs.

I give Luna a look and motion outside of the bush. Luna coughs and moves out of the bush. “I’m going to see if I can catch a rabbit or something.”

I watch her walk away and when I’m sure she can’t hear us I turn to the blonde. “I doubt it means anything but I’m sure not everyone hates you”.

“How would you know?”

“Well, I don’t hate you and I hate most people so…”

“Hmph.”

“Listen, you have an interesting, fun personality. On top of that you’re gorgeous and nice… and for what it is worth I am honored to have been your first kiss”.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“Listen, you have an interesting, fun personality”, brunette flashes me a small smile. “On top of that you’re gorgeous and nice… and for what it is worth I am honored to have been your first kiss”.

_ Wow. _

I want to respond to the brunette but words fail me. What she said is one of the nicest things someone has ever said.

Luna walks out from behind a tree. She has a small rabbit in her hands. As she looks at it the anger on her face is obvious.

I look at brunette who is looking at the ground as she runs her finger along her bottom lip.

“I… I didn’t mean to sneeze”, I whisper.

“It’s whatever”, Luna shrugs. She nudges brunette.

“Huh?”, she looks at me. “Oh, I”m sure you can do other things”.

“Just not hunting… or fighting. Two of the most important things.”

_ Wow, I’m useless. _

Now that I think of it the only reason I have survived this long is because of Luna and brunette. And this camp. I wouldn’t have survived day out in the forest alone.

_ Maybe I should just go back home. _

Sighing I bury my head back in my knees.

“There is one thing you haven’t done. It can really save your life”, Luna begins. “Do you like fish?”

************************

I crouch by the lake that is known for the Trikru to fish at. Apparently this is where most come to fish since there are plenty of fish.

I lean forward to watch the fish swim by. The sizes range from really small to what I would call huge. There’s plenty of colors that the fish have. Most come in the shade of blue. Some seem to have the whole rainbow.

As I’m watching one big fish lunges out of the water and at me. 

“Ah!”, I scream and stumble back. Landing on my back my head hits a bucket full of fish. “Ouch”, I sit up and rub my head. Looking at the buckets I was as they one by one fall over. The fish fall out of the bucket and flop around on the ground. Many of the fish go back into the water while some get covered in dirt and eventually die.

Angry fishers start yelling. Someone in the group yells, “it’ll take another day to catch that much!”

“I’m sorry”, I apologize. I do this repeatedly hoping it’ll calm them down. Through the corner of my eye I see brunette is hiding her head in her hands while Luna looks at the ongoing argument.

“Ok”, she jumps off the fallen tree. “Not fishing. Too crowded for you.”

I look at her. “Then what can I do?”

“Follow me”. Luna leads me over to a rock. She tells me to sit and just wait.

“Ok”, I take a seat on the rock. I’m forced to watch as Lexa tries to calm down the angry hunters, the group of training people and the fishers.

Luna at first tries to help brunette but ends up agreeing with the angry men. 

_ What have I done? _

I look towards the camp and sigh.

_ Why am I still here? _

Having enough of watching the mess I caused, I jump off the rock and run past everyone. Making my way through the forest I run into camp and into the brunette's tent. 

In the room I push my way under the bed and curl up under the bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the whole Luna laughing at Lexa biting Clarke should be the 17th but if I change it then the rest of the timeline may/may not be messed up. I’m writing this note after I’ve finished the story so...


	23. Chapter 23

Early September 20th, 5057

**_“Up”, a voice growls._ **

_ Five… more minutes… _

**_“Up!”_ **

My eyes blink open. I stare into the dark as I blink the sleep out of my eyes. 

_ God… _

**_My wolf plops down and starts licking her chest._ **

**I’m up.**

**_She doesn’t spare me a glance as she continues grooming herself._ **

I roll over to try and fall back asleep. That’s when I’m met with a gorgeous face. The brunette lies in front of me fast asleep. 

She must’ve moved me here after last night.

Late night September 19th, 5057

“Clarke”, a sweet voice calls out to me. “You in here?”

At first I didn't move. I’m not entirely sure who it is. I know it isn’t some stranger because one: only a select few are probably welcomed in here and two: they wouldn’t care anyways.

I question if it is Costia. She does come off as the type to attack people when they are weak.

“Hey, it’s me. Head”.

When she says “head” I peek out from under the bed. I look up at the brunette. I’m waiting for her to give me some dumb speech that is meant to be motivational. The cliche type of speech. I wouldn’t be surprised if she tried to make it sound like we are friends.

**_“Are you not?”_ **

“I’m not here to try and cheer you up”, she says. “Well force you to cheer up anyways”.

I don’t respond to her. Instead I watch as she moves over to the bed and crouches down. Her green eyes look at me sending shivers down my spine.

“I just want to know if you’re ok.”

“I’ve felt worse feelings and worse words have been said to me.”

“Just because you have heard and felt these things before doesn’t mean you’re ok with it”. She sits down. “So, are you ok?”

I keep my eyes on her as I try to put on a brave face but I can feel it falling apart so I look away. “I…”, I choke on my words. “No”.

“Thought so”.

“Did it show that much?”

“Kinda”, she does a little rocking. “Yeah”.

“Great”, I mumble.

“Um, listen”, she moves closer to me. “I’m not very good, no. I’m not good at all with this whole… talking to cheer someone up or any of that stuff. I don’t do feelings.”

_ So I’ve noticed. _

“I don’t really like starting conversation or even having them to be honest”.

“Then why be here?”, I scoot back with the intentions of going back under.

“I don’t like having conversations but I do know how to listen. So”, she lies down on her stomach. Resting her head on her arms she looks at me. “How about I lie here with you and if you want you could talk to me and I’ll listen. I won’t try to cheer you up nor would I sugarcoat things. I’ll listen to your problems which I feel like no one has really done”.

Inside my wolf happily sits up. Her tail wags back and forth sending water splashing all over the place. Jumping up she runs in the water.

**_“Take it! Take it! Now, now!”_ **

Despite my wolf’s interests I go to reject her proposal but stop when she smiles at me. This sets up a million red flags and even makes me mad. I hate fake smiles. I can handle speeches but I can’t handle fake smiles.

The long I look into her eyes the easier it is for me to realize it’s not fake. Her face says it all. She has zero walls up and is inviting me into a genuine conversation.

“Does that sound good?”, she seems to move closer to me. “Clarke”.

**_“Yes!”_ **

“Y-yeah”. Knowing I can trust her I scoot forward.

“Hmm”, she looks away and ahead of her. 

With this we let a silence fill between us. I don’t mind it since I know I can talk at any time and she wouldn’t mind. I have a feeling she also likes the silence. She did say she doesn’t carry conversations.

“Can I-”, I cut myself off. Brunette is giving me a look that says “we both know the answer to that question”. “Right”, I nod. “I uh… I became used to people saying similar things that those men did. I was never good at being useful anyways. I’m better being left on the sidelines… that’s a fact”. “Sometimes my own mother would tell me that.”

Brunette glances at me. “Harsh”.

I nod. “Harsh”, I mimic.

She stares at me. It looks like she wants to say something but won’t or can’t. Without saying anything she looks away.

“Y’know, I ran away from my camp because I had enough. I thought I could get away from everything in that camp and finally be happy. And I was… I was happy here. And I still am but I realized I can’t stay here. Well not forever anyways.

I’m happy here because I didn’t yet disappoint anyone. Sure everyone glared at me but I can handle that. I could handle it because I knew they hated me because of what my people have done and not because of all the things I have done…”

“Until now”, the brunette whispers. 

“Until I broke weapons, messed up a hunt by sneezing and the whole fish situation. Now they have a reason to hate me because of something I personally did. Not my people. Not my mom. But me”, I look away. I can feel my eyes are beginning to burn meaning one thing.

_ Whimp. _

“It sucks”, I look at the brunette again. “It sucks and I don’t know what to do! I hate this feeling, I hate that I can’t control it and that in the end I’m utterly useless”, I shake my head. “And I can’t change that”.

Brunette looks at me.

Hurriedly I wipe my eyes. “For once I want to be somewhere where I’m not some burden. Where I-”. I choke on my words. I feel like I’m choking as the tears run down my face. Putting my face in my hands I whisper, “I shouldn't have left”.

A few seconds pass before a hand touches my head. When I look up the hand flinches away from me only to lie on my head again. It stays still before turning into a gentle rub.

Looking at the brunette I see she is looking away as she gently “pets” my head.

“Uh… there there”.

I can’t help but smile. “You really aren’t good at cheering people up”.

“I said I wasn’t”, she finally looks at me.

Reaching up I put my hand over hers. “Thanks though”.

She nods. Retracting her hand she rolls onto her back. She still looks like she wants to say something but won’t.

“Brunette.”

“Hmm?”

“You look like you want to say something”.

“It’s just… here, come lie by me”.

I take up the offer and crawl out from under the bed. I lie by her, my head resting on her arm. “You’re an interesting woman.”

No response.

I look away from her face and at a small tattoo on her arm. Reaching across her I touch the tattoo. At first she flinches her arm away before letting me touch it. I begin to trace it.

I whisper, “does it mean anything?”

“Just fun to have.”

Sighing, I move my hand away and get comfortable. We lie on the ground both thinking about different things. At some point I reached out and started flicking the end of her hair. There’s only one loose strand that fell from her usually neat braid.

Though she’s nervous, the brunette has her fingers running through my hair. Her eyes are closed as she faces up towards the ceiling.

“Do you have long hair?”, I whisper. I glance up at her to see if she heard. She now has one eye open as she looks at me though the corner of the eye. “It’s just always up in a braid and…”. When she doesn’t respond I shake my head. “Sorry f-”

“It’s a fair length”, she opens her eyes.

I nod. I begin to let myself relax as I come to realize just how tired I am. A huge yawn shakes my body. I try to keep my eyes open but the feeling of the brunette running her fingers through my hair is relaxing. The way she’ll occasionally play with the ends before running her fingers back through them. This causes my eyes to close.

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

A gentle snore comes from the blonde. Her finger twitches against my stomach. It does this a few times before her hand grabs onto my shirt and fists up.

Using my free hand I brush a finger along her hand before turning my head to look at her. Her eyes are scrunched shut and her breathing has fastened.

_ Nightmare? I thought I got rid of the source. _

Reaching up I brush the back of my fingers along her cheek. This turns into a gentle stroke. The stroking seems to calm her down as she visibly relaxes, her grasp on me loosening.

As I look at her I realize that in her sleep all the stress on her face has gone. She doesn’t even look troubled.

**_“Mine!”, my wolf walks to a spot and stops. She sniffs along it and whimpers. “Mine”, she seems to whisper. The helplessness on her face is clear._ **

**We can’t claim a Skaikru.**

**_“But you want to”._ **

Sighing I use my hand to lift the blonde’s head so I can move my arm from under it. The feeling in my hand explodes back to life. I’m glad she was comfortable but I don’t know if it was worth no feeling in my arm for a few hours.

I move her body onto my lap and guide her head to rest on my shoulder.

_ Slow and steady, Lexa. Slow and steady. _

********

(Clarke’s POV)

Early September 20th, 5057

**_“Up! Now!”, my wolf snaps._ **

I bring myself to sit up. I have to move slowly out of bed to make sure the brunette stays asleep. As a leader I assume she’s a light sleeper but it doesn’t seem that way. Maybe it’s because of the guards who are constantly guarding her.

I move away from the bed and put on my shoes. When I step out of the tent two guards look at me. One narrows his eyes while the other struggles to stay awake.

“Where are you going Sky girl?”, the first whispers.

“Clear my head. Just get some air…?”

He eyes me before nodding. “Off you go”.

Truth be told I have no idea where I am supposed to go or why my wolf woke me up. I would prefer to stay asleep on a nice soft bed.

I decide to start “exploring” by walking around the silent camp. It feels creepy since it’s too quiet. I’ve gotten used to the joyful screams of the children and whispers of adults whether they be talking about me or everyday things. Adults like to whisper in this camp.

**_“Lake”._ **

_ Lake? Why the lake? _

**_“Lake!”_ **

Taking a look around I make sure the guards can’t see me before I slip out of camp. I head in the direction I feel the lake is. It takes a few minutes for me to find it but when I do a feeling of pride and achievement swells through me. 

I walk up to the edge of the lake so I can look at the fish. Plenty swim by and in front of me. I want to try and catch one but I can’t remember how the villagers did it.

I turn away from the lake and search for something else.

A big eared mouse runs out of a bush and to another bush. It runs bush to bush in some pattern. As it gets closer to me I try to step on its tail but miss.

**_“Catch it”._ **

*********************

**_“Worthless”, my wolf growls._ **

I ignore those words as I look around. I’ve caught zero mice and the sun is already rising. Three hours of chasing and I caught nothing.

**_“Useless”._ **

I try to push my wolf down and away from me. Usually she is the one living thing that has been with me since the beginning but I don’t want her around. I really do wish she would leave me alone.

**_“Can’t even catch a mouse”. Her blue eyes seem to pierce through me. “Nothing. You’re nothing”._ **

_ Go away! _

**_She sweeps her tail over the water on the ground. “As you wish”. With those few words she turns her back to me and disappears into the darkness._ **

When I can’t see her anymore I feel an empty hole in my chest.

_ She’ll come back. _

She’s just in a bad mood. Obviously something is pissing her off. Something frustrated her.

I start heading back to camp though this time I take a little detour. I mindlessly walk around the forest trying to avoid going back to camp as long as possible. As I’m walking I pick up a familiar scent. It’s the scent of someone I think I know or knew. 

Taking a look around I realize I’m by one of the many streams in this forest. This stream has a rock on one side. I do think that rock would make a great resting place.

“Hmm”, I shrug and take a path back to camp.


	24. Chapter 24

September 20th, 5057

********

(Alexandria’s POV)

_ Do I want to leave? Abandon the blonde in the dark as she mopes? _

**_“No!”_ **

I know I won’t leave her. When I consider the thought a strange feeling comes over me. It’s a feeling that you can’t shake. A feeling of protectiveness and sadness at the thought of leaving.

I hate these feelings. I hate the confusion that comes with them. They always come when I’m near the blonde. I also hate the anger that comes when Clarke is sad or upset. For some strange reason I can’t leave the blonde alone and I hate that!

Taking a deep breath I move close to the blonde. I crouch in front of her. “LIsten, I want to help you”.

“Why?”

“I… I don’t know yet”.

“Hmph”.

“Ok then… when I look at you, whether you’re struggling or looking around in awe, I see myself. And a lot of people gave up on me so I don’t want to give up on you.”

Clarke peeks at me from behind her hands. “Really?”

I nod.

“Even though I messed up a hunt?”

“Even though you messed up a hunt”.

“Broke weapons?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Lo-”

“People are bad at things”, I shrug. “But they work at improving it so how about we spend the rest of the day doing something together? Personal training but not training.”

“That makes no sense”.

I feel relaxed as I can tell the blonde is now smiling. “C’mon”, I reach my hand down. Clarke takes it and I help her to her feet.

I head out from behind the hut but the blonde stops before walking out. Looking over my shoulder I see she’s hanging her head. Her hand shakes as her grip on my hand tightens.

“Everything ok?”

“Can we not go out that way? I don’t want to be seen”.

“Right”. Stepping behind the hut I lead her into the forest without being seen by anyone. “I thought I would show you how to climb. It’s not a needed skill but I feel you would enjoy it”.

I don’t get a response.

“Is that ok?”

“Y-yeah”.

“Great”, I lead her over to a tree. “This is sturdy enough. So first you’ll want to identify safe places to put your feet and hands. Weak points will only slow you down and put you at risk of falling”.

“Ok”, Clarke moves over to the tree. She walks around in it a few times before lifting her foot up and testing a certain spot. “This?”

“If you think it’ll hold your weight”.

“I do”.

“Alright, so now…

***************

… see, you did i-”

“Hey! Look a cub!”

“Clarke-”

“It’s so cute”. Not knowing the danger the blonde walks over to the cub. She’s reaching down when a loud bear roars and runs out of the bushes. She stares Clarke down.

“Clarke, remain calm”, I whisper. 

I can see Clarke’s breathing fastening. She’s frozen stiff. She bites her bottom lip so hard that it starts to bleed. 

“Clarke”, I whisper. I recognize a look in her eyes. They glaze over as she is sucked into her own mind. Her blue eyes seem more blue.

**_“Mine!”, my wolf whimpers hoping to get out._ **

_ No, no, no. _

“Clarke!”, I snap.

There’s a painful scream that erupts from Clarke. Before I can react a golden wolf stands in front of the bear. Seeing the wolf makes the bear stand up on its hind legs. It roars at the wolf.

Running forward I shift and place myself between the bear and Clarke. I nudge Clarke trying to get her to run. She doesn’t move at first but with a second nudge she turns and runs. Turning I run behind her.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

**_Out, out, out, out, out._ **

The same words bounce around my head. They block out every single noise. My mind feels hazy, I feel like I can’t see. Everything around me is a big blue.

All I know is that I’m running. Where? Where am I running?

_ Brunette… _

A sharp pain shoots from my behind. Sharp teeth pull and drag me into a dark place. I’m about to crawl out of the darkness when two green eyes catch mine. They look at me for only a second before looking away.

**_Safe._ **

As everything becomes less blurry and my mind clears, pain starts coming from my body. I can hear bones popping and breaking as I take on a new form. My regular form.

Ahead of me the black wolf turns into a familiar face. Though this time the person is full of anger. “The hell was that?!”

“I… I don’t know.”

“You don’t shift in front of a bear!”

I scoot away from brunette.

“Well?”

“I didn’t know what to do and… got scared a-”

“If you would’ve trusted me-”

“You say I should trust you”, I look up at brunette. “But how can I trust someone who won’t even tell me their name!”

Brunette doesn’t respond. The anger in her face has gone.

“I… you expect me to tell you everything. Yet you can’t tell me your name?”

She looks away from me and at a rock.

“Or”, I move close to her. “I don’t even need a name. Middle name?”

No response.

“Just something so I don’t feel like I’m trusting a stranger.”

Reaching out brunette runs a finger along the edge of the rock. Her eyes are glued to that rock.

“Fine”, I squeeze out of the burrow. Sitting by it I take a look around. There’s no trace of the bear. “We should get going”.

Behind me the brunette crawls out of the burrow. She's brushing the dirt off her clothes. “Why the rush?”

“Just assumed your people would get worried. You have been in the forest alone with some stranger”.

“I don’t think of you as a stranger”.

I look at the brunette. “Charming”, I don’t try to keep the sarcasm out of my voice. Turning away I straighten my clothes and brush the dirt off. 

“Clarke, li-”

“Can we just go?”

“Bu-”

“Please!”, I snap. “I don’t want to be in the forest for any longer. The bear is still mad at me… so I assume”.

“Alexandria”.

“Alex… what?”, I turn to her. “Is that the bear’s name? It’s c-”

“My name”. She smiles. “It’s Alexandria but people usually call me Lexa.”

“Alexandria”, I whisper. 

Brunette’s face seems to redden up. Her green eyes are lighter than usual.

“Alexandria”, I test the word again. “Lexa”, I whisper. I nod. “This would be when I reveal my name but you already know that”.

Alexandria nods and smiles. The blush on her face slowly disappears. “I didn’t mean to yell at you earlier. I really didn’t. It’s just… y’know…”, she rubs the back of her neck.

“Yeah, yeah”, I wave the conversation away. “Can I call you Alex?”

Alexandria eyes me. “Well no one has called me that before so…”

“Oh, I get it. Sorry for asking.”

“No, no. It’s just I’m surprised”, she smiles at me. “You can call me Alex”.

“Awesome”. I lean towards her. “Alex”, I say looking her in the eyes.

Alex looks at the ground, the smile still on her face.

***************

I’m looking down at the folded blanket and my pillow as I fix my shirt. “Hmm”, I glance at Alex. “It’s gonna get colder tonight right?”

Alex doesn’t respond. 

I can’t help but smile at the way she is dressed. Not her attire but her glasses. I thought she would have perfect vision.

When Alex turns the page she finally looks at me. “Uh, yeah”.

I nod. “Thought so”.

_ In that case I will need another blanket. Another pillow wouldn’t hurt me either. _

“It’s gonna be extra cold on the floor”, she says.

I nod again.

“And uh… I don’t know about you but I don’t sleep well when it’s that cold.”

“Usually I don’t mind the cold. I stay up late, or used to, back at home”.

“That’s good. WOuldn’t want you to get a bad sleep.”

I look over my shoulder and at Al- Lexa. “Is there a problem?”

She shakes her head. “No.”

“Are you sure?”, I step towards her. With a smile on my face I say, “You look like you want to say something”.

Lexa closes her books and sets it on her bedside table. “I was uh, just thinking I would want to make your stay here comfortable”.

“That’s really nice of you. You have been really kind to me, I have to admit that. I’m surprised that you e-”

“Do you want to sleep with me?”, she blurts out.

“...ven- what?”

Alex rubs the back of her neck. “I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just I wouldn’t want you to be cold at night so I figured I’d ask if you’d want to sleep on my bed for a few nights or something.”

I eye her. “T-”

“Yeah, just forget it. It was a dumb porpos-”

“I’d love to”.

Her eyes widen before a look comes into her eyes. Although the bed is big Alex still scoots over. I’m about to climb under the covers when I catch a glimpse of her book.

Reaching over her I grab the book and look at it. Sitting comfortably I look over the book. I glance at Lexa who has an arm draped over her eyes. “Do you guys have a library?”

She nods.

“Am I allowed in there?”

“Anyone is”, turning her head to face me she removes her arm from her eyes. “Do you wish to go there?”

“I’m pretty sure most of the books are in your language anyways but I would enjoy going in one.”

Rolling onto her stomach she uses her elbows to prop herself up. I know from her lips moving that she asked a question but my mind is focused on a drawing in this book. There’s a circle at the top and many more towards the bottom. Weird designs go in a line from the bottom circles to the top.

The book is snatched from my grasp. Green eyes look into mine. “Well?”

“Huh?”

Reaching over she puts the book back onto the table. “Have you been in a library before?”

I can’t help but feel embarrassed. I hate how little I know. On top of that, how little I have seen.

Lying down by Alex I face the ceiling. I fold my arms over my stomach. “I have. There was a library on the Ark. It was a small library but it was better than nothing”.

“And?”

“Well, I would spend a lot of time down there. Most of it was spent trying to find a good book but if I wasn’t browsing books then I was either reading them or doodling on a random piece of paper.”

“So then you know a few things.”

I smile. “A few, I got more brains than beauty”.

She shakes her heads. “I’m not sure about that. A lot of people around here would say you’re gorgeous.”

I look at her. “They’re more attracted to me because they’re unmated. Though they have been taking their eyes off me because you bit me”.

“I didn’t bite you”, she sighs.

“Even if you didn’t they would have to take their eyes off you. That’s a challenge”.

“They only look at me because of… reasons”, she coughs.

Lying on my side I turn to look at her. “Reasons? What reasons?”

“Y’know, intimate reasons.”   
I lean towards her. “Intimate reasons? Meaning?”

Alex eyes me. “Stop it”, she grabs a pillow shoving in my face. 

Laughing, I grab the pillow and hug it to my chest. “Stop what?”

“You know what”.

********

(Raven’s POV)

“How could you just let him leave!”, Octavia shouts. She angrily walks through the forest.

“I can’t exactly stop your husband. He’s not exactly warm and cuddly.”

Octavia doesn’t respond. She takes a sniff every now and then as she follows Lincoln’s scent trail.

“Floukru. We’re getting close right?”

She nods. Grabbing my wrist she pulls me over to a bush. “He’s near”.

Peeking through the bushes I see LIncoln. He’s shouting at a Floukru loner who is repeatedly saying something in a weird language. 

Lincoln points the gun at the man. The man reacts instantly. One second he is there and the next he is gone. A second later the man jumps out of a tree with his sword out. His sword sinks into Lincoln’s back.

“Lincoln!”, Octavia shouts. She moves to run out of the bush but I grab her wrist. 

“Let’s go”, I tug on her.

“No!”

The man, some Floukru guy, looks at us. He takes a quick look around before running off.

“Let’s go”, I start running. As I do Octavia is dragged behind me. Halfway to the camp Octavia falls to her knees. “C’mon”, I push on her back hoping to get her to move. With one last shove I give up and let her sit on the ground in tears. We’re back on our territory so there should be no real threat.

“I want them dead”, she whispers.

“O-”

“I want them dead! Now!”, she screams.


	25. Chapter 25

September 21st, 5057

********

(Clarke’s POV)

Books. More books. A bunch of books.

“I love this”, I whisper. Reaching up I run my finger along the spine of a book. “What’s this say?”.

Looking away from a book Lexa leans over. “To Kill a Mockingbird”.

“I’ve heard of this book”, I take a quick look inside. “It was a popular book back before the bomb. Kids used to study it”, I set it back.

I keep walking down the library. I don’t understand what they say but it’s interesting looking at books. It is nice that Lexa translates titles for me.

I look at Lexa and smile at her. She’s always two feet behind me. When I smile at her she flashes a small quick smile back at me.

“Look at this one”, I hold up a book. “Ain't it colorful?”

Alex reaches out and takes the book. “It’s a book about the mushroom cloud.”

“Why so colorful if it is about death? The thing that caused many people’s death.”

She shrugs. “I’ve personally never read it.”

I nod. I’m about to say something when there’s shouting outside.

“Help! Help!”

Lexa hands me the book. “Stay here”. I watch as Lexa runs out of the library.

“Stay here?”, I scoff. I run out of the library and follow Lexa. 

In the center of the camp there’s a crowd. I can hear hushed whispers and sounds of shock.

“Help”, the man groans. 

A woman steps forward but is stopped by a guard. “Don’t touch”, the growl.

“Help, Skaikru… Skaikru is gonna take over”, he coughs. “The camp… attack… camp”.

I watch as the man goes limp. His chest is no longer moving. I take a small step back hoping I can blend in with the crowd and manage to walk away. I’m close to the tent when a hand roughly grabs my arm.

The person wastes no time in dragging me towards a hut. Turning I finally look at the person.

“Brunette”, I whimper. “Ow, ow”.

Lexa tosses me into a hut and slams the door shut behind her. 

“Better start talking”, she growls.

“About?”

“Don’t play dumb”, she steps towards me. “You have to know something about why your douchebag of people are trying to kill people!”

“I don’t.”

“Bullshit!”. When she starts walking towards me I scoot back on my butt. “Start talking.”

“I don’t know anything.”

With each step she takes the anger in her eyes becomes worse. I’m backed up into a wall. “With every second you withhold information another person dies!”

“I don’t know anything.”

“Right, and I’m expected to believe that.”

“Yes”, I look away. 

**_“The man!”_ **

I remember the mans face. It’s strangely familiar. “That wasn’t Floukru”.

“Looked Flo-”

“That man was too torn apart to be one of my people. They use guns, whatever attacked him had teeth. It ripped him apart.”

Lexa gives me a look.

“My people can’t shift! Ok! We can’t shift. We’re only good with guns that cause bullet wounds not slashes on your throat and your arm falling off. We can’t do that much damage, that person wasn’t a Floukru person.”

Alex takes a small step back.

Getting up I walk around her and leave the hut. I walk over to the body that is still lying on the ground. I crouch down in front of the person.

“What’re you doing?”

Reaching out I grab the person’s hair to lift their head. A few people start shouting at me but I ignore them. Lifting his head I get a good look of his face.

“Nathan”, I growl. Letting his hair go I roll him over. “This was a guard at my camp, he used to guard my door and other things”. Digging through his pockets I find an ID and a picture. “His was Nathan. I’m sure they killed him and sent him with this message. They’re trying to scare you”.

Behind me Lexa walks over to the man. She eyes him then looks at the ID. “So it seems that way”.

“I told you I knew nothing”, I can’t help but mutter.

“I’m sorry”, she crouches by me. I keep my eyes on the ID hoping I can end this conversation. A warm hand lightly touches my arm. “Can… can I see?”

I hold out the ID.

“No”. She gently grabs my arm and stretches it out. She eyes the spot she was holding me. “That’ll bruise”, she whispers.

I shrug. “Just a bruise”.

“I’m sorry”, her finger brushes against the bruise. I flinch away from her. 

I catch Luna looking at us so I try to get this over with. “It’s fine. Really”.

Lexa lets go of my arm. Her eyes hold this look that says regret. For this I can’t stay mad at her.

******************

“Well we can’t just sit here”. An angry man taps his fingers on the table. He’s glaring at everyone but mostly me. “And why is she here?”

I take a look around the room. I’ve never been in this place and based on the long table I assume it is used as a meeting room.

I was invited here to hear the meeting that is going on right now. It seems everyone is talking about whether or not they should help Floukru.

“There’s bigger matters to deal with”, Alex mutters.

“It could be a trap. The whole Floukru situation”. A timid woman glances at Alex. 

“They came from their territory… Floukru is very precise about their territory”, Alex lends back in her seat. “I think the least we could do is search it out. WE have to know if there are actually Skaikru people over there. If so how many and if they will be a threat to us or”, she glances at me. “You”.

“Who cares if they are a threat to her. If they want her then give her!”

“I care”, Lexa growls. 

“Or”, a man stands up. “We could give them what they want!”

Turning I look at the man. He has a lot of hate for me.

“Everything was tolerable until you showed up!”, he steps towards me. When he does Lexa growls.

“Sit down.”

He does so.

“I want a few guards to look at the current situation. Determine if they will be a threat to us in the end.”

“And Floukru?”

“Let them fight their own battle. We could help but we all know they wouldn’t do the same for us.”

“And her?”, the man points at me. “What about her”, he jabs a finger in my face.

Without thinking I slap his hand away from me with a growl.

The man immediately growls back. He stands up so fast that his seat flies back.

My wolf leaps to her feet as she becomes defensive. She’s alert and watching this man carefully. Now that she has been released she’s more than happy to make another appearance.

“You b-”. He doesn’t finish his sentence as he turns into a wolf and leaps at me.

Ducking down I feel my skin tear as my wolf makes an appearance. She shakes her fur out and turns and looks at the man. Baring her teeth she sinks to the ground waiting for the man to make a move.

He finally hits the ground and rolls over onto his side. Leaping to his feet her glares at me.

_ No! _

I try to take control over everything and change back. This confuses my wolf. She growls and shakes her head. 

**_“Don’t try to stop me”, her voice curls around me. “Let me protect you”._ **

**Not like this.** **_“Then h-”_ **

A body slams into my wolf. A pair of sharp teeth grab onto our throat and bite down.

Kicking my wolf tries to claw him off. She’s weak as I try to take control. The air is knocked out as we're thrown into our back.

Think he has won he shifts back.

My wolf's grip on everything suddenly slips. Both her and I are shocked.

A feeling of pleasure rushes through me. I try to stay shifted but as the pleasure builds I'm forced out of my shift. A small whimper leaves my mouth as soon as I've shifted.

How?

Lost and confused my wolf fails to answer.

The pleasure falls away. My mind starts to clear. Maybe I can shift again.

All at once the pleasure hits me like a bullet. "Ah!", I cry out, the throbbing between my legs becoming unbearable. 

"That's right", the man growls in my ear. "That's a good, slutty Omega".

The urge to submit gets stronger. My body wants to submit. I have to fight against it as it wants to get in position, mounting position.

"Submit", his teeth scrape against my ear. When I feel his thumb dig into the area one inch about my pubis I know what's going on.

I thought Omega pressure points were unknown. I knew I wasn't slutty!

Through the corner of my eyes I see Lexa watching. She wouldn't dare do anything... not in front of everyone.

A loud embarrassing moan fills the room. Whimpering I hide my face in the carpet.

C'mon Clarke.

I attempt at pushing myself up and the man off. I have to bite my tongue as the pleasure builds. My anger rises when his hand starts wandering. Lower and lower.

**"C'mon!", a reasurring voice fills my head.**

Gripping the carpet I let out a loud growl. "You", I can feel the pleasure building but the man's grip is loosening. With one last grunt I push against the floor. The man falls off me. "Asshole!", I turn and kick him. He stumbles back.

**"Yes!"**

The victory is short lived when he has his mind in order. He shoots daggers at me.

**“Please. Trust me”.**

I… fine.

Backing down I let her take control of everything. She lets out a growl.

The man shifts. "Come at me".

Wasting no time she bites down onto his throat and throws him. Rolling the man comes dangerously close to the edge. His weight takes over as he tumbles over the edge.

I assume has fallen but one wolf paw reaches up and clutches at the edge.

My wolf goes back into hiding finally letting me take control. Crawling towards the balcony I move to help him up but a hand grabs my wrist. I look up at Alex.

She gives me a slight shake of her head. “Leave him. You have won.”

“I don’t want to win”.

Pulling on my wrist she pulls me away from the man. 

With wide eyes I watch as the paw loses grip leaving him to tumble to his death. I have to turn away to not watch everything unfold. I do hear the thud as he hits the ground.

Inside my wolf lets out a victory howl. She does a little prance as she is happy with her kill. 

**_“Our kill”._ **

“Ok then”, Alex releases me. “Indra take Clarke to my tent. She is to stay there until I figure out this whole… mess.”

“What?”, I look at her.

Ahead of me Indra walks over to the door. “C’mon”.

“I want to stay”.

“Heda gave her rules, now c’mon”.

I look at Lexa who is looking at me. She has this look on her face as her head is slightly tilted.

**_“Don’t be a pushover”, my wolf growls. “Show her! Show her you are strong and won’t be bossed. Show our-”_ **

Pushing her down I turn away from Lexa. I walk out of the room. Indra doesn’t leave as she whispers commands to a few guards.

Peeking into the room I meet eyes with Alex. She has this strange look in her eyes.

**_“Weak. She thinks you’re weak!”_ **

**Protective.**

**_“She protects the weak which is what you are!”_ **

“Let’s go”, Indra nudges me with the end of her spear. “Now”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually had to study "To Kill a Mockingbird"... Didn't understand shit (except why it was called what it was), maybe because I wasn't trying to understand. Who knows. Though I do know Scout was my favorite by far.  
> Also the wolf speaking which is in bold for some reason got rid of itallic but I'm upgrading it in my phone and that takes ages so... Sorry.


	26. Chapter 26

********

(Raven’s POV)

A bloody scream erupts from a man. A Skaikru guard wastes no time in stabbing the man and ending his life. I’ll never look at Mavel the same again.

I can’t believe that is the same guard who would make others laugh. Who would play with the children by playing horses with them or cops and robbers.

Shifting on the branch I test it again making sure it won’t snap and I won’t fall to death. I shouldn’t be sitting in a tree.

Turning my attention back to the fight I find that Floukru is still fighting. MOre and more soldiers keep showing up only to meet the same fate as everyone else. I’m surprised Floukru is still standing at this point. THey’re determined to fight and stay alive.

_ How can we fight an innocent clan? _

Lincoln was their territory, he deserved what came to him. He shouldn’t have threatened the man. This whole fighting thing was Octavia’s idea. Why was it approved? Abby still believes her daughter is in that camp so why not attack?

As one SKaikru guard gets close to the tree I climb over onto another branch. I’m not supposed to be out here so I have to stay hidden. It is rather easy when everyone is fighting but I can’t take any chances. If I were caught then I would be in big trouble for being out and bigger trouble for not helping in the fight. 

Taking a quick look at my surroundings I find a few hidden guards. They’re not fighting or don't have any weapons so they can’t be Floukru. Maybe Trikru considering they neighbor Floukru. I’m taking a look at all the faces when I come across a very familiar one.

_ Trikru woman. _

I know her. I trust her. But why is she out here? Shouldn’t she be at her camp?

As I’m looking at her she spots me. Her eyes skim over my body. She looks away and whispers something to one of her people before sneaking away. I watch as she climbs up the tree and over to the branch I am sitting on.

“What’re you doing?”, she whispers.

I don’t respond. Leaning I look over her shoulder and at a certain woman. She has brown hair and shocking green eyes. She’s focused on the fight. She’s dressed like an everyday citizen though her clothes are fancier than Trikru woman. Looking away from her face I look at her hands. They are tightly gripping her pants.

“Someone’s not happy”, I whisper.

Trikru woman looks over her shoulder. She eyes the green eyed woman. When she turns back to me she positions her head so I can no longer see the woman.

“Who is she?”, I ask.

The woman shakes her head meaning she can’t answer or won’t. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m watching”.

“Shouldn’t you be helping?”

“Huh?”

“With the fight. Shouldn’t you be helping?”

I shake my head. “I have no interest in fighting. This whole fighting is dumb.”

Glancing over her shoulder the woman brushes her fingers along my cheek. “See ya”. With that she climbs down the tree and rejoins her friends.

I watch her jump down the tree and return to her group. She whispers something and they all sneak away.

*****************

********

(Clarke’s POV)

The whole day has passed with no big things happening. I didn't expect anything to happen. I’m stuck in a tent after all.

I did, however, expect for someone to come into the tent and talk to me. For someone to spend time with me so I’m not alone for the whole day. That didn’t happen. I had to entertain myself which is hard when not only are you bored but your wolf is too. What does your wolf do when bored? Tear things apart.

And that is how I find myself sitting in a corner with the remnants of pillows surrounding me. I’m still spitting up fluff.

There’s a few shirts that have been torn apart and the corner of Lexa’s blanket is torn.

_ She’s gonna kill me. _

**_“Calm down”. My wolf plops down and starts grooming herself._ **

I hug my legs closer to myself. I don’t know what I am going to say to Lexa when she shows up tonight. I may have just confirmed my way of being kicked out of this camp. I do know she wouldn’t kick me out at night so that’s nice. I’d have to adapt to sleeping alone again. That’s gonna be hard.

**_“Stop worrying and wait!”_ **

Waiting is what I do. I wait as the minutes tick by. I wait as the minutes turn to hours that feel like an eternity. Where is she?

**_“She’s not coming”._ **

At first I deny this but I come to realize my wolf is right. She’s probably busy with the whole camp fighting situation.

Guess I’ll have to spend the night alone. Realizing this makes a strange feeling come over me. I don’t know why I feel like this but I don’t have time to dwell on it so I shrug it off.

Setting up my bed I lie down. I turn around and lie on my back.

**_“Go to sleep”, my wolf’s sweet voice fills my head._ **

As she curls up a strange warmth wraps around me. With the night’s cold gone I drift into a sleep.

September 22nd, 5057

When I walk out of Lexa’s room I’m met by a meal on the table. I’m surprised to see this. I don’t remember hearing anyone in the tent earlier, let alone someone making food.

Heading into the kitchen I look around as though expecting someone to appear.

_ Still alone. _

Taking a seat I look over the food. There’s a few things I like, not much though. From eggs to pancakes to french toast. All looks delicious but I can’t eat it.

Turning away from the food I take a sniff of my clothes. 

_ I smell. _

Moving away from the food I head to the tent entrance. “Indra?”

“Skai woman.”

“I want to shower.”

“Too bad”.

“I smell.”

She growls. “Your people always do”.

_ How rude. _

Sighing I walk away from the tent entrance. I take a seat on the couch. Bringing my knees to my chest I hug my legs.

****************

“I can’t take it anymore!”, I shout. Picking up a pillow I throw it at the tent entrance. It flies out the tent and lands somewhere outside.

“Hey!”, Indra shouts. “Stop throwing Heda’s stuff!”

Growling I stand up and move towards the tent entrance. My feet come to a sudden stop as a force makes me stand still. 

**Let me go!**

**_“Calm down.”_ **

Growling I feel my skin tear as my wolf tries to gain control. I fight against her pull and get control again. With one last growl my mind becomes hazy. My wolf makes an appearance. I can feel the darkness wrapping around me as my wolf disappears into Lexa’s room. Jumping up onto the bed.

My wolf goes into the darkness letting me have control again. Stretching my arms I lightly pat my body down. A few sore spots but not many.

I move around on the bed feeling for soft spots or a place I can lie down. I find myself lying down on Lexa’s side of the bed. When I lie down Lexa’s scent wraps around me. This makes me have a strange longing for Lexa. I assume this strong longing is from me being lonely.

The more that I think about the feeling I come to realize I have had this longing for a while now. Ever since I decided we were friends. This is probably due to Lexa saving me. It’s me being thankful.

When I wake it’s due to the harsh voices coming from outside the tent. Getting off the bed I quietly walk to the tent entrance. 

“Do you know what is happening down in Floukru?”, a guard whispers.

“I’m not completely sure but I do know that Skaikru is causing plenty of damage. Though Trikru did start helping in the battle, we are fighting while Floukru takes time to recover in a Trikru camp. They may never return to their old camp and the amount of people Trikru has will slowly go down unless this fighting stops. Flourku may never return to their old camp.”

**_“Rough”._ **

I take a step away from the tent entrance.

My people are fighting and killing innocent people to the point they can’t stay at their own camp. Now Trikru is dying?

Having enough I run out of the tent. I have to push past Indra who stumbles back.

“Hey!”, she shouts.

Ignoring her I seek out Lexa. As I’m running through camp, with Indra on my heels, I notice a few people who are bleeding. There are families crying over dead bodies.

Strangely enough only a few people glare at me. Those I meet eyes with show sadness and sadness only. They don’t show hate or anger towards me. If they do have hate in their eyes it is directed at my people but never me.

I run towards the meeting room expecting Lexa to be there. I’m reaching for the doorknob when arms wrap around my waist. 

“Let me go!”, I kick at the air and claw at Indra’s arms. Kicking the door the door swings open.

Two green eyes look up at me watching as I kick in an attempt to be let go. “Indra”.

“I’m sorry Heda, she just got out.”

I stop kicking to take a look around. There’s a group of people sitting at the table. They all are looking at me watching with amusement. One man is glaring at me. He must blame me for everything.

Using my elbow I swing it up and into Indra’s chin. Groaning she lets me go and takes a step away.

Brushing myself off I step into the room ignoring a groaning Indra. Before I can say anything Lexa says, “everyone out”.

The people whisper a “sha Heda” and leave the room. They leave rather fast.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Lexa doesn’t respond to me. She reaches out and pours herself a glass of water. Using a small cup she scoops ice and drops the cubes one by one into the glass.

Plop.

Plop.

Plop.

Plop.

Pl-

“Want one?”. She calmly glances at me.

“No, no I don’t”.

Leaning back in her seat she takes a long sip. “What didn’t I tell you?”

I hear her question but I don’t register it. I take a long look at her, I can feel my eyes wandering.

A voice sings out. “Clarke”.

“Huh?”

“What didn’t I tell you?”

“Right, that Floukru is dying and your people are dying too.”

“I didn’t think there was a need to.”

“A need to? All this shit is happening because of me. How could you not tell me?”

Setting her cup down Lexa stands up. She calmly brushes off her clothes. With slow steps she begins to walk towards me. “I have my reasons for not telling you certain things. This is one of them.”

“What?”

“I knew if I told you anything then you would blame yourself for everything.”

_ Well yeah. Of course I’m going to blame myself. _

“I knew you would be ripping your hair out and losing sleep.”

“How can I not blame myself? I ran from my camp. I knew my mom would hunt for me yet I tricked myself into thinking I could run an-”

“This isn’t your fault!”

**_“Tsk”, my wolf sniffs the water at her feet. “Here we go”._ **

I take a look around the office. I don’t know what to say. I have a feeling she wouldn’t like me saying anything.

“Plus if I did let you know you would run off and do something dumb.”

_ Something dumb. _

Turning I run out of the meeting room. I know what I have to do or should do.

“Clarke!”, Lexa is quick to chase after me. I’m almost out of the building when Lexa grabs my arm yanking me back. “What’re you doing?”

“I’m doing what I’ve should’ve done”, I attempt to get her hand off me

“Which is?”

“Go back home and end this bullshit”. I start clawing at Lexa’s hand. “Let go”.

“So you’re going to give up?”

“I’m not giving u-”

“Yes you are!”, her hand tightens on my arm.

“If I do this then your people stop dying and so does Floukru. Do you not want that?”

Lexa doesn’t respond. She thinks my question over. Looking away she looks through the window. She looks at the dead bodies and crying people. She stares at the men lying on the ground in pain then to Luna who is leaning against a tree. Luna is looking at the same things that Lexa is but slowly her eyes go to Lexa. They seem to share words just by looking at one another.

“No”, Lexa looks at me.

I pull my arm away. “What?”

“It’s hard to explain.”

“Try! For once try to explain something.”

She doesn’t respond.

“Fine then”, I make a move to walk away. Lexa grabs my wrist. “Don’t touch me!”, I turn and push her. “L-”, I cut myself off when a jolt of electricity runs through me. From deep inside my wolf wakes up from the slumber it tried to get into. It looks around confused then starts seeking something out. Desperate to find the sudden source of energy she looks around her “cage” with determination. She’s desperate to lap it up. She sends one word bouncing around my mind.

_ Mine. Mine. Mine. _

Taking a small step towards Lexa I look down at my hands then to Lexa. When I meet eyes with her I find she’s gotten 10x more gorgeous. Growling my wolf breaks out in a howl. It howls to me and something else. The thing it seeks. It howls to another wolf.

I try to push her down like I’ve always done but my wolf growls and attempts to stay. It’s determined to stay. She won’t let me silence her. Not anymore.

In that moment I can feel something trying to get in. Trying to talk to my wolf. From the distance I see a faint silhouette. As it gets close the silhouette turns into a wolf. When it is close enough my wolf reaches out and tries to sniff her. She lets the wolf into her territory. Once they’re close my wolf rubs her head against the other wolf, her tail wagging. For once it’s not dragging in the water.

A warm feeling erupts from my chest. It makes it way through my chest and lights every empty hole in my chest. 

“No way”, I whisper in shock.

_ My mate. _


	27. Chapter 27

********

Before Clarke finding out about Lexa

(Luna’s POV)

To the right of me I can hear Lexa saying words as she tells some story. All these words go in one ear and out the other. I can’t focus because my mind is still on Raven.

“Hey”, I turn to Lexa. “You guys go on ahead. I need some time to get my thoughts straight”.

“You ok?”

“Yeah… just feeling things.”

“Ok”, she motions to her men to keep moving. “Bring some food back if possible”.

“Will do”.

Before I walk off I watch Lexa and her people walk off. When I can no longer see them I turn and run where Raven last was.

Much to my surprise she’s still sitting in the tree though this time she’s facing me.

“Knew it”.

“Huh?”. I waste no time climbing the tree and sitting by her.

“I knew you would come back.”

Testing the branch I turn to her. “You should get back. It’s not safe to be so close to a fight, especially this dangerous.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“Can’t risk that”, I lean forward. “Promise you’ll head back soon?”

“Yeah”, she smiles. “Yeah, sure.”

I nod. Reaching out I lightly brush my fingers along her cheek. With a final nod I jump down the tree.

“Hey, Trikru.”

“Hmm?”

“You haven’t seen anyone… strange recently have you?”

“Define strange.”

“Y’know, blonde hair, blue eyes. An Omega?”

I look up at Raven. “Go on.”

“She answers to the name of Clarke. Super nice and asks plenty of questions but also really stubborn.”

“Are you asking if I’ve seen a person?”

Raven looks down at me. “Yeah.”

“A skaikru person?”

“Yep.”

She’s talking about blondie. I am in no place to reveal she is with us even if it is to Raven. I wish I could tell her.

“Can’t say I have.”

Raven whimpers. “Course, it was dumb to ask in the beginning.”

“I’m sure the person is out there.”

“Yeah… I hope so.”

********

(Clarke’s POV)

When I feel the wolf running around in my chest I know it can only be one person. Lexa’s wolf. It has to be. My wolf wouldn’t let anyone else in.

Upon realizing this I dig deep down to get a look at this wolf. I see a wolf with green eyes that are slightly darker than Lexa’s. Moving around it I can see it sports a night black pelt.

When I look around I don’t see the familiar cage walls that trapped my wolf in. They’re gone.

Looking at the thin sheet of water on the ground I see something is shining on it. I stare down at a field of stars. When I look up the whole sky is covered in stars and galaxies. It’s a 180 from the usual darkness. I feel like I’m back in space but without the walls of the ark. I can go anywhere I want.

I look back at Lexa who is nervously looking at me.

“No”, I run a hand through my hair. “How can this happen?”

“Clarke.”

“I… this has to be wrong. It has to be.”

The more I talk the more Lexa looks sad. I know my words hurt. I know I shouldn’t say them but I keep talking.

“Clarke”, she steps towards me. “Calm down.”

“I can’t be mates with the enemy!”

Lexa visibly flinches. “Enemy”, she whispers.

“Yes, I mean not us. We’re not enemies it’s just our people are and I’m currently wanted and-”

“I get it”. She smiles a sad smile. “Can we talk? Somewhere more private?”

“I really don’t want to.”

**_My wolf whimpers as she feels the sadness from Lexa. As soon as she whimpers the black wolf runs over to her and cuddles up to her._ **

“Please?”

I shake my head. I’m about to leave the building when I see just how many people saw everything, how many saw us fighting just to end up gazing into one another’s eyes.

Curious people look at me but when they see me looking they pretend to get back to work. It’s obvious they are still listening.

_Shit._

“Ok”, I look at Lexa .”Let’s talk.”

“Great. H-”, before she can say anything more I walk past her. 

I head in the direction I assume the meeting room to be. I come to a stop when the hall breaks in two. Right or left?

I glance behind me. Lexa is watching me but doesn’t say anything.

_Ok… I know where I’m going._

**_“No you don’t”, my wolf mocks. Turning to Lexa’s wolf she nudges its head. “Which way?”, she asks the wolf._ **

**Traitor.**

**_Lexa’s wolf looks around. It seems unwilling to answer._ **

_So both Lexa and her wolf are stubborn. Great._

**_When the black wolf looks at my wolf its tail begins to wag._ **

“Take a left”, Lexa answers outloud. 

“I knew that.”

“Your wolf didn’t”, Lexa mumbles.

“Do you or do you not want to talk?”

Lexa doesn’t respond.

I walk back into the meeting room. Picking up the glass I take a sip of the water. It’s still cold.

Lexa walks into the room. She goes straight to her desk and takes a seat on top. She has a lot to say but she doesn’t break the silence. Reaching down she starts playing with her shirt.

Setting the glass down I start walking around the room. I admire how the meeting room isn’t as bland as Lexa’s tent. There are paintings on the walls and vases with flowers on dressers and in the center of the table.

One painting is of the stars while the other is of a mushroom cloud. I reach out and brush my fingers along the drawing. They managed to make something so sad look so beautiful.

**_“Talk”, my wolf wags her tail. “Talk to her”._ **

**But how?**

My wolf doesn’t respond as she is busy running around with Lexa’s wolf. 

I move over to the table. I take notice of the flower in the vase. Blue iris flowers.

I take a seat at the table and reach out to lightly touch the flower petals. They’re soft. “My favorite”, I smile at Lexa.

She looks up from her shirt and to the flowers. “Hmm?”

“These flowers, Irises. They’re my favorite. Do you have a favorite type of flower?”

She nods. “Hydrangeas. Preferably purple.”

“Those are pretty.”

A few minutes pass before I ask, “this is why you wouldn’t let me leave?”

“Flowers?”

“No… our ‘connection’. Is that why you wouldn’t let me leave?”

“Yes and no.”

“No?”

“I didn’t want you to leave because I thought I wouldn’t see you again.”

“So because of that you would let a clan go extinct and your people die?”

“It’s not like that.”

I stop looking at the flowers so I can look at her. “Then what is it like?”

Instead of a response Lexa looks away.

Feeling angry I push her wolf away from mine and put the cage back around my wolf.

“You make no sense!”, I snap. I tilt my head to look into her eyes. When I do I can her wolf start attacking the barrier I have set up. “If I can’t leave this camp because you won’t let me-”

“You physically can’t.”

“I can leave if I want”. I stand up and start walking towards Lexa.

Lexa makes a “tsk” sound and shakes her head. 

With each step I take the more a look of distant fear comes onto her face. Leaning forward I place my hands on either side of her. “Why can’t I leave?”

Lexa looks to her right refusing to look at me. “Back up”. Knowing I shouldn’t invade an Alpha’s space I step away from her.

I turn and start walking away.

“Where are you going?”

“Where do you think?”

A strange yet familiar smell fills the room. It only takes me a second to realize it’s Lexa who is releasing the smell. It’s a dominance pheromone.

Grabbing onto my wrist she pulls me towards her. Suddenly standing up she stands close enough that our noses almost touch. With her so close the smell makes me feel like I’m suffocating. 

Grabbing onto my shoulders she turns me around and pushes me into the desk so I’m lying on my stomach.

Growling I try to get away but stop when I feel her arm on the back of my neck.

A nail runs down my spine sending shivers through my body. “You and I both know why you can’t leave. Someone would come close to a breaking point if they are to be away from their mate for a long time.”

“You’re not my mate”, I growl.

“Logic says otherwise”.

“Ugh”, I push against the table trying to get up. Applying pressure Lexa pushes me back into the table. Her pheromones get stronger until it fills the room.

“Don’t fight it”, she whispers.

“Get off”.

She applies more pressure. “Come on Clarke”, she whispers, her breath tickling my ear. 

Whimpering I turn my head so my neck is showing in submission. Lexa tilts her head trying to catch my gaze. I look into her eyes trying to understand what she’s feeling or thinking but I find one thing. A hunger for dominance.

Looking away I avoid Lexa’s gaze.

“That wasn’t so hard”, she steps back putting space between us.

I get up. With my back to Lexa I smooth out my clothes. All I can think about is how suffocating her pheromones were. I’ve always hated pheromones. They were an unnecessary tool Alphas used to force Omegas into submission, just like Alex did.

She’s still releasing those pheromones. I’m assuming she’s doing it so I don’t get in her face again. As long as she releases those smells I won’t be in a room with her.

**You just had to fall for an Alpha. A leader Alpha on top of that.**

_I’m destined for a life of submission._

“You ok?”

I tense at the sound of her voice. Taking a step away from her I keep my back to her as I readjust my clothes again. “How are you going to stop the fighting?”

“Let me worry about that”.

I turn to her. “Bu-”, I cut myself off. Looking at my feet I mumble, “fine”.

Behind Lexa the door opens. Lexa lets out a low growl as she turns to look at the person.

“Indra”.

“Am… am I interrupting?”

“No”, I step around Lexa. “I was just leaving”. As I walk out of the room I can feel Lexa’s eyes on me. When I finally make it out of the building I run into Luna.

“Woah”, she steps back. “You ok there?”

“I’m fine”, I try to step around her but she steps in front of me.

“Doesn’t seem like it”.

“I’m fine”.

She blocks my move again. “You look angry.”

“I’m fine!”

“Shh”, Luna puts a finger to her lips. “Don’t start yelling, Lexa may come to your aid and I got this feeling you’re mad at her.”

Gritting my teeth I give up on trying to walk away.

“I’ve never seen you mad before. It’s threatening. Scary”, Luna smiles. “But I also know you hold no real threat to me considering a simple smell can make you fall to your knees.”

“Pheromones”, I growl

“Your eyes are slightly red… shaking. Hmm, clutching your clothes. She used pheromones huh? That’s why you’re mad… you like other Omegas hate that.”

“Yes, she did.”

“I’ve never seen an Omega so mad about it. Usually they go into permanent submission when an Alpha, one as powerful as Lexa, uses those pheromones.”

**_My wolf growls at the thought of permanent submission._ **

Permanent submission is when you know an Omega has given up. Most Omegas are born with this strange need to not submit. They know that as an Omega they will have to submit to someone eventually. Though some never end up submitting, they become rogues due to their desire to be on top.

Young Omegas almost never submit and as you get older the more Alphas fight to make you submit. It isn’t all that hard considering you may have met your mate by then and chances are they’re an Alpha and Alpha’s want power. So you have to submit. In a way. In a relationship where both of you hold equal amounts of power yet they have a bit more. It’s nice… so I assume anyways.

But permanent submission, just thinking about it makes me mad. When an Omega finally hits its breaking point of Alpha pheromones and just lets them consume her. She breathes in the pheromones, all she smells are pheromones. She lives the pheromones. You can tell they’ve given up because the light in their eye is gone. They blindly follow orders. They are the ‘perfect’ Omega. Lifeless and with two goals. Please the Alpha and bare pups.

“No way in hell is that happening”, I growl. I look at Luna. “Is there a reason you’re talking to me?”

“Eh, are you gonna explain what happened earlier?”

“I don’t even know”.

“Liar.”

“Can we not talk about this? There are bigger, better things to worry about.”

“Fine”, she steps around me. “Oh, Lexa didn’t tell you but she decided to help Floukru.”

“I heard. Though I never got the answer to why. Who annoyed her until she caved”

“She did it so you wouldn’t run over and try to be the hero, she was afraid of what would happen to you. Then if everything became calm there was a chance you’d talk to her.”

“Talk to her?”

“That’s what she told me. Apparently if she didn’t help then you’d be mad and maybe wouldn’t talk to her”. Luna sighs. “I don’t know. I do know that she enjoys talking to you Clarke. As much as I hate it, she enjoys your company. I can’t give you a 100 percent answer so you should ask her yourself but I have feeling it has something to do with the small chance that you two might b-”

“Stop.”

“Ok but all I’m saying is take time to listen to Lexa. Emotions aren't her strong point so you have to be patient.”

****************

I’m deciding if I want to sleep on the floor or with Lexa tonight. I know I should sleep with her considering how everything is going but a part of me doesn’t want to. A part of me wants to turn and run. If it weren’t for my wolf I would be out of here.

The flap of the tent moves as Lexa walks in. She freezes for a second. “Hi”.

“Hi”.

Moving slowly she walks over to her bed. She’s pulling back the blankets when she comes to a stop. She gives me some look but doesn’t say anything. Leaning over she blows out the candles and climbs into bed.

I stand in the darkness still making my decision. 

_Who am I kidding?_

I climb onto the bed. Using what little light is provided I see Lexa holding up the blanket inviting me in. I lie down and she places the blanket on top of me.

Sleep doesn’t hit me the way I wish it would. It seems so far away as my mind is running at a million miles.

“Clarke?”

A strange silence answers her questions.

A warm arm wraps around me pulling me back towards Lexa. “You ok?”

I grunt.

“I do wish you found out a different way.”

“Found out? You knew?”

“I suspected it…”

Removing her arm from me Lexa whispers “look at me.”

I grunt but don’t move. I don’t know what would happen if I look at her. I hate to see the look in her eyes.

“Please?”

“I… I can’t.”

“Just for this then you can turn away for the rest of the night.”

With a sigh I roll over so I can look at her. “Yes?”

“Luna said something a while back. It was when she noticed the little nickname you had for me. Brunette”.

“That’s nice.”

“You see I never really did friendly nicknames. I made people call me Lexa because it was shorter than saying a long name and Heda, they kinda have to. Not even Luna can call me nicknames and we’ve been together since birth.

She questioned why I let some random Skaikru girl call me brunette and I didn’t have an answer back then. I was confused. But now I realise it made me think I was one step closer to becoming friends with you. That my chances at a relationship with you were higher and it made you smile. I was glad something I did and allowed would make you smile.”

“Why did you care about a smile?”

Lexa doesn’t respond for a second. She lets out a distant hum. “I… I think it was because you were so sad. So confused. You ran from everything you knew only to end up in some camp where everyone glares at you yet you showed a smile and were nice to everyone. They were forced smiles at times and attempts for people to not see you as an enemy so when I let you call me brunette you let out a real smile. It made my day and I guess that became my goal ever since. To make you smile a real smile”, she pauses. “Clarke, I don’t do relationships all too well but I want something with you. Give me a chance?”

“Can I think about it?”

Lexa nods. “Of course.”

With that I nod and turn back around. “Hey, Alex?”

“Hmm?”

“It’s obvious you don’t do relationships”.

Lexa lets out a breathy chuckle. “Goodnight Clarke.”

September 23rd, 5057

Our morning starts out like usual though this time I don’t take a shower. I wake up to Lexa missing from the room. Like usual she’s sitting at the table with Luna as they eat breakfast. Luna will talk about something Lexa doesn’t listen to and I’ll sit across from them enjoying breakfast. Halfway through Cat-Eyes skips in, plants a huge kiss on Lexa’s cheek. Though this time the kiss set my wolf off. She wasn’t all too happy but I pushed her down and ignored her anger. Lexa’s wolf from inside calmed mine down. 

I had to act like this didn’t bug me. I think it’ll forever bug me.

“Alright, move”, Costia glares at me. “My seat.”

“But I’m sitting here”, I look up at her.

“Wha-”, Costia looks around. “Are you talking to me?”

I don’t get a chance to answer as she pumps out a threatening pheromone. Due to her being an Omega it isn’t as threatening as an Alphas but still bugs me. 

I reach up and cover my nose hoping to block it out.

**_“Don’t look weak!”, my wolf snaps. With a low growl she starts pumping out her own pheromones._ **

Costia smells them making her growl. I’m just asking to be attacked. Costia slams a hand on the table rattling my plate. Leaning forward she gets in my face. “Why you”, she growls. 

Having enough my wolf growls back. The growl shakes my throat, shocking even myself. 

**_“Get back”, a voice that doesn’t sound like my own fills the room._ **

Costia’s eyes flash a dark blue meaning her wolf is now at the surface. **_“You first”, it growls at me._ **

“Girls”, Luna says.

We both growl at her causing her to shut up. 

From the corner of my eye I see Luna nudge Lexa.

Lexa shoes Luna away. “C’mon Luna, they’re just having fun.”

“They’re gonna tear eachother apart.”

I’m contemplating giving up and letting her have the seat but my wolf won’t allow it. Howling she breaks through the surface. I don't feel the usual pain of my skin tearing as my wolf makes an appearance. A rushed transformation that I know will leave my bones aching.

Leaping at Costia’s throat she bites down and throws her across the room. 

Costia slams into the couch. As she’s getting up she turns into a wolf and runs at me. My wolf ducks down dodging Costia. 

“Not inside!”, Luna shouts.

At the shouting my wolf looks at Luna. She eyes her trying to figure her out. When Luna moves she growls.

**_“Enemy?”, she asks me._ **

With a hazy mind I’m not able to answer her.

**_“Enemy”, my wolf growls._ **

Flexing her paws she steps towards Luna teeth bared. 

“Woah”, Luna puts her hands up.

With the sudden action my wolf growls seeing her as a threat.

“Luna”, Lexa hums. “How about you shut up before she bites you.”

The words fly over my head sounding like gibberish. Everything turns red as my mind slips letting my wolf take complete control.

Listening to Luna’s previous words my wolf slams into Costia pushing her outside. Running out of the tent she jumps onto Costia’s back and bites into her scruff. With her hind claws she scratches at her back making gashes.

Costia rolls over getting the wolf to let her go. When she swipes at me my wolf leaps back. Lying on her stomach she lets Costia approach her before leaping up and aiming at her stomach. Knocking her over she bites down into her stomach. 

Costia lets out a painful yelp, her feet helplessly kicking. With another bite my wolf rips out flesh. Before she can bite again a voice stops her.

“That’s enough”.

Growling my wolf ignores her. She goes to bite down but a strong smell wraps around her. Seeing red my wolf wants more. She wants to see Costia bleed, see everyone bleed but the smell prevents her. Trying to avoid it she steps back letting Costia go and steps away from Lexa.

“Back inside”, Lexa motions to the tent. “C’mon”.

Growling my wolf steps over.

**_“Fuck this”, my wolf growls. She retreats back into the shadows._ **

I take another step away from Costia but don’t go inside. Covering my nose I look at Lexa. I know I should go inside but I’m not walking towards her, not with those pheromones.

Sighing Lexa steps away from the tent entrance. When I don’t move she takes another step then another. 

When I step into the tent a different smell pushes into my face. A smell I can handle. I slowly move my fingers as feelings flood into them. “I hated that.”  
“She’ll be fine”. Lexa moves over to stand in front of a mirror. Lexa starts fixing her hair acting like nothing happened. I expected her to give me some lecture.

I move over to the couch and take a seat.

“You whooped her”.

“She’s right”, licking a finger Luna presses down one of Lexa’s hair. “That was epic.”

Lexa glances at me. “Your eyes are red. Stay in here and calm down. I don’t need you attacking another person and I assume Costia is still moping around. Who knows how your worf will react.”

I look at the ground.

Luna pipes up. “I can do some training with you so you can learn to control your wolf. It seems she’s always on the defence and you depend on her for safety.”

“That’s not true”.

Luna coughs. “If I’m recalling correctly your wolf had to tell Costia to, and I quote, ‘get back’ because…”

“I was confused”.

“Which means your wolf had to step up and protect you. You depend on her… a little too much it seems. She’ll always be on the defense if you keep depending on her.”

**_“Bullshit”, my wolf takes control long enough to say that._ **

“Sorry”, I glance at Luna. “Thanks… for helping”

Luna nods.

Lexa glances at me. “You really don’t react to pheromones all that well.”

I don’t respond. I watch as both of them walk out of the tent.

****************

Once I have calmed my wolf I step out of the tent to officially start my day. As I walk away from the tent the smell of Lexa doesn’t go away. I take a sniff of my shirt and find it reeks of Lexa. How much did Lexa claim me as hers with her smell?

I spend one night in her arms and suddenly it’s like I’m bathing in her smell. I wasn’t even aware she was doing this. When did she get close enough to do this?

With a heavy sigh I drop the shirt knowing the smell will stick with me for a while.

_She just had to do this._

It’s not like I hate the idea of being her mate. In fact, I’m happy I’m her mate. Anyone who found their mate would be happy. I finally found my mate which means I won’t be alone no matter what happens. It’s nice to think that and know it is true.

I just wish I knew more about her. I wish I knew more than her name is Alexandra and that she’s a leader. Maybe more personal things.

_God-_

“Oof”, I bump into someone. “I’m sorry”. Rubbing at my head I look up at the man. “I was- Johnny?”

Upon seeing the Alpha my bite mark flares up. I reach up and put my hand over the mark.

“Long time no see blonde”, he smiles at me.

_I wonder why._

“Your mark is fading. Does that mean Heda gave up on you. No, you still sleep with her. Y'all are sleeping together right?”

I shake my head. “No, I stay in her tent.”

“So there’s nothing between you two?”

Looking over Johnny’s shoulder I see Lexa walk out of a hut. “I wouldn’t say that”, I take a step away from Johnny.

“So I have a chance.”

“I wouldn’t say that either. I wouldn’t suggest making a move at all”. I take another step back when he steps towards me.

“Hey, I don’t bite”, he reaches out. Grabbing my hand he lifts it to his mouth and plants a kiss. “We should take time to talk. Get to know one another.”

“I-I’m good.”

“Don’t be shy. I don’t care if you used to be a part of the enemy. I got this feeling we would be great together. Have gorgeous pups.”

“Really Johnny… I uh, I don’t think that’s a good idea and I would appreciate it if you let my hand go.”

Johnny smiles. “When I look in your eyes I see the oceans.”

**_“Heard that one before”._ **

I look him in the eyes trying to read his expression. They shine a strange gold that draws my wolf in. Taking a small step forward I get drawn further in.

_Why can’t I mate with him?_

My trance is broken when I meet eyes with Lexa. She’s keeping her distance but she’s watching Johnny closely. When she locks eyes with me a cold shiver runs down my spine. I don’t trust the look in her eyes.

**_“Neither do I”._ **

Taking a big step back I pull my hand away from Johnny. “Really, leave me alone. It’s best for both of us and I mean this.”

“For both of us”, Johnny glances over his shoulder. “Oh, are you scared of her?”, he asks loud enough.

“N-”

“Your eyes are so wide”.

I glance at Lexa who wears the same cold expression. The only thing giving her away is the slow tapping of her foot. “That’s be-”

“She’s hit you!”, he exclaims. Plenty of people look at us.

“What, no!”, I eye him. “Lexa would never. She-”

“Likes you?”

“I wouldn’t say that”.

“She wants to protect you?”

I shake my head. “I’m not sure”.

“Loves you?”

_Does she?_

I look away. “Not exactly”.

“Then what is it Clarke?”

“It’s complicated”.

“Lexa won’t bug you. I can protect you”, he moves forward. With each step he takes I step back. He moves until I can’t back up anymore. Leaning forward Johnny whispers, “I know you want me”.

Looking away I focus on something far away. “It’s not me who needs protecting.”

Johnny places a kiss on my neck. Repeatedly placing kisses he slowly moves down in a line. 

Whimpering I grab onto the edge of the barrel behind me.

_Lexa…_

**_Not knowing what to do my wolf crouches to the ground. She whimpers and hides her face under her paws._ **

Warning signs go off when a hand sneaks under my shirt. The hand splaying out on my stomach.

“That’s enough”.

Opening my eyes I’m shocked to see Lexa so close. She has a hand on Johnny’s shoulder. “Step back.”

Growling Johnny shoots a glare at her. “Can’t you see I’m busy?”

“You can do this the easy way o-”

Cutting Lexa off Johnny turns and swings at her. Jumping back Lexa swings her leg landing a kick on the side of Johnny’s stomach. Groaning he stumbles to the side.

“You ok?”, Lexa looks at me. She moves over to me, her fingers brushing along my neck. “He kissed you”, she growls. “You see, I knew I shouldn't have le-”

“You bitch”. Johnny, still gripping his side, growls at Lexa.

“Hey!”, Lexa glances at him. “Can’t you see I’m busy?”

Johnny growls again.

“One minute”. Wrapping her arms around me Lexa steps back moving us away from Johnny just as he swings a punch at us. “Stay here”, she pats my cheek.

Turning away she attacks Johnny. I watch as Johnny and her fight one another. It’s so random. Lexa is winning then Johnny then Lexa. As this goes on I can see she is getting frustrated with having to deal with him.

“Dude”, she punches him in the face. “This”, she kicks him in the stomach knocking him onto his butt. “Is getting”, a kick to the balls that makes Johnny groan in pain. When he sits up she kicks him in the face sending a tooth flying. “Ridiculous”. With one last kick he falls over. He doesn’t move for a few seconds leading me to believe he is knocked out.

Wiping her mouth Lexa spits out blood.

On the ground Johnny groans. He slowly sits up. “That's all you got?”

“Oh there’s more.”

I step between Lexa and Johnny. “Lexa, leave him be.”

Ignoring me Lexa moves towards Johnny.

I step in front of her. “Please”.

“I’m not going to kill him”. Her green eyes find mine. Instead of the usual warm feelings I get this cold, unwanted feeling.

“You will”.

“By accident maybe”, she growls at me. “Move”.

A feeling of fear rushes through me. I know, deep down, that Lexa would never hurt me but after what happened I can’t help but doubt.

Lexa notices this fear but she doesn’t move. Her eyes go from my eyes to Johnny. “Clarke, move”.

Sighing, I step out of the way.

Not wasting another moment, Lexa moves over to Johnny. A few feet from him she shifts. She doesn’t tease him. She strikes straight for the throat.

A pained scream comes from Johnny but it only lasts a second. A second later he goes limp implying he’s dead. Although he’s lifeless, Lexa rips out his throat and tosses it in my direction. 

I look down at the bloody mass in front of me. I cover my mouth and hold anymore gags down in fear that something will come out.

_That wasn’t an accident._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No update tomorrow. Also blue iris represent faith and hope. Purple hydrangeas represent a deep desire to understand someone.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so sorry. I forgot to update yesterday and then I was going to not update today but then realized I had just enough time before I would complete last minute things and go to sleep. There will be two more chapters updated today, one is a fun chapter, then everything will be on a normal schedule from tomorrow and on.

I force myself to look away from what was Johnny’s trachea and to my supposed “mate”. She stands above the body. With a scowl on her face she wipes the blood off her face.

When I look at the body my legs give out. Sitting on my knees I bend over and let everything come up.

Warm arms wrap around me from behind. I don’t have to look at the person to know who it is. “It’s ok”, the sweet voice whispers.

I don’t respond. My attention is on the cold eyes of the body that stare at me. I can feel the throwup begin to rise again.

Pulling me closer to her, Lexa's hand makes its way under my shirt. Her hand splays out on my stomach and begins a slow rub. “It’s ok”.

I lean back on Lexa. The small motion of her hand is soothing so I allow it.

“C’mon”, Lexa stands up. Helping me to my feet she leads me over to the shower hut. We go through the back of the hut and into her private shower room.

I look around the shower room knowing why I was brought here. “Is the water always hot?”

Lexa shrugs. “Do you need help or…”

“I got it.”

Lexa nods and turns around.

Double checking that she’s not looking I slip off my clothes. I move over to the tub. Putting my foot out I test the water with my foot before getting in. The hot water is like a warm hug. It soothes my upset stomach, not as well as Lexa’s hand.

“You can turn around”.

Lexa does so. She moves around picking up my clothes and setting it in a pile.

Cupping some water I splash it on my face to wash everything off. 

_ I can’t believe I threw up. _

“First time seeing a body?”

“I’ve seen one before I just haven’t seen a murder. You?”

“I have seen plenty in my lifetime. Battles, wars, angry Alphas. You name it.”

“I would prefer not to.”

Smiling, she shakes her head. “Here”, she moves over to me. I watch her carefully uncertain of her actions. “I’m just going to wash out your hair”. She moves behind me. Lifting my hair she runs her finger down my neck.

I look at her clothes which have some blood on them. “Alex?”

“Hmm?”

“How can you be so calm after killing something?”

“Clarke”. Her voice has an outlining of warning.

“It’s just… you are so calm. You ripped out a throat. I-”, water rushes down my head and over my face. 

“So I did”. “I told you. I have seen bodies and murders. I have been a part of some killings. It doesn’t phase me.”

“But why? Don’t you feel bad? Don’t you hate the taste of blood?”

Lexa sighs. “When I kill someone I imagine them as a parasite. If I do not kill them then they will slowly tear apart everything I have worked hard to build. I can’t allow someone like that in my camp so I get rid of them no matter how bloody it gets. So-”, she cuts herself off. Running a hand down my head she says, “you’re tensing up. Let’s not talk about this, puking in the water defeats the whole purpose of a bath.”

Swallowing everything down I nod. “Y-yeah.”

**********

“Ok”, Lexa takes the plate. She puts it on the counter then sits back down.

I look down at the table. Reaching out I trace the lines on the table.

“Clarke, can I ask you something?”

“Depends”.

“Just stuff to get to know you better”.

I look at Lexa. Tilting my head I lean forward. “Why?”

“I… I thought I could get to know you. We don’t know much about each other and we may be stuck with one another for life a-”

I cut her off. “I get it”.

Lexa nods. “Well?”

“Go for it.”

“Ok”, she looks around the tent. “Favorite color?”

I frown. “Too personal”.

“Oh! I didn’t know. Then uh-”

Putting my head in my hands I start laughing. “I’m kidding.”

Lexa doesn't respond.

“Is knowing my favorite color really what you want to know? Out of all the questions…”

Lexa smiles. “Yeah… how about how do you prefer to relax?”

“Drawing. For sure. I do like to read sometimes but drawing is my go to.”

Lexa nods. “I’ll remember that”.

“What about you? How do you relax?”

“I attack things.”

“Of course”, I shake my head. “Are you always angry?”

“Do I come off like that?”

Eyeing her I shake my head. “I’m not sure. Ok, I got one. What is your favorite color?”

Lexa raises her eyebrows. “Really?”

I nod. “I’m curious.”

“Alright”, she eyes me. “Blue”.

“Blue?”

“Yep”, she nods. “Blue.”

“Does it have something to do with me?”

Lexa shrugs. “Can a woman not like blue?”. Shifting on her seat Lexa asks, “what was space like?”

I frown. “Ask that again?”

“What was space like?”

I look away from her. Looking over her shoulder I look out into the camp or what little I can see. “Space. It was big. Empty. Cold. And lonely but it was so beautiful”. I smile. “I had a great view from my room. Most did but I got a view where I could see Earth. I used to draw everything I saw.”

Lexa leans forward. “Did you… did you go out there?”

I shake my head. Looking at her I smile. “No, only the unfortunate got to go out there. I was doing other things. Leaving the safety of the ship wasn’t something anyone wanted.”

An amazed look falls on Lexa’s face.

“Your people are amazed by space”.

She nods. “It’s weird to think you came from there. I can’t imagine leaving the ground.”

_ I used to never imagine leaving the sky. _

****************

“No”, Lexa laughs. “No you didn’t.”

“Hey! You promised you wouldn’t laugh”.

“I’m sorry it’s just”, she starts laughing again. “A pumpkin Clarke. A pumpkin on your head”.

“I was young”, I lightly shove her shoulder. “I had to see if my head fit.”

“Course you did”. Smiling, she wipes away a tear. “You’re something Clarke.”

“Alright then”, I shift in my seat. “I got a perfect question for you”.

“Ask away”.

I swish the red juice in my cup. “When did you first fall in love?”

Lexa blinks at me.

“When did you first fall in love with me?”

“Do you want me to answer that?”

I nod.

“A while back. A long while back. Before we met actually.”

“Stalker?”

“No”, she shakes her. “No, no. God no. I saw you leave your camp. I was in the shadows and I watched you until you got stuck in the trap. When I saw you interact with that deer I knew you were different. You didn’t kill or even attack her. You looked around at everything with awe, such an innocent look in her face that fascinated me.

I wanted to get to know you but I couldn’t approach you so I stuck to the shadows. I waited for you to turn back around but you didn’t then you got stuck so I thought I would make an appearance. Best decision ever.”

“And?”

“There’s more?”, she whispers.

“There has to be.”

“Anytime we interacted… that made me happy. I like talking to you. Something about it.”

**_“Amazing”, my wolf happily sighs. She’s swooning over the compliments._ **

I lean towards Lexa. Putting my glass away from me I keep moving closer until we’re inches apart. I see a light blush settle onto her cheeks. “Lexa?”

“Y-yes?”

“How can you like the enemy with no worries?”

“Wanna know my secret?”

“Depends on the secret…”   
“Come close and I’ll say it”.

I lean closer.

“Closer”.

“I lean even closer.

She leans in. Reaching out she rubs a lock of my hair between her thumb and index. “I don’t see you as the enemy”, she whispers.

I look into her eyes trying to read some sign of a lie but there’s nothing. “But I’ve killed your people”.

“Wasn’t you.”

“My people have taken territory”.

She shrugs. “Wasn’t you”.

“I’ve started a war!”

“Wasn’t. You”, Lexa brushes her hand along my cheek. “I don’t know why you’re dead set on making yourself appear as a threat when you really are some confused, young Omega who wants to see the world and be free of whatever is in your camp. I don’t know how many enemies you have but know this”, she looks me in the eyes. “As long as I breathe I will not be your enemy. I don’t care if you slaughter my people, if you call me names… if you refuse to be my mate. Fuck, if you wanted to run and leave everything behind I would follow without second thought. I will not turn my back to you”.

“Lexa…”

“I know, I know. The-”

I cut her off. Bringing her closer I press a kiss onto her lips.

“Clarke?”, Lexa looks at me.

“I-”

“Alright blondie”, Luna burts into the tent. She wastes no time in walking over to me and swinging her arm around my shoulder. “Time to learn”, she sings, rocking us back and forth.

“Luna”, Lexa growls.

Luna looks at Lexa. She sees the frown. “Oh”, she looks at me then back to Lexa. “Did I interrupt something?”

“No”, I stand up. “We were just talking”.

“So you guys settled things?”

“We were doing that”. I push Luna’s arm off me. “So what am I supposed to learn?”

Luna doesn’t say anything. She gives Lexa some strange look before leaving the tent.

I look at Lexa. When she sees me looking she looks at the ground. “See you out there”.

****************

“Come”, Luna motions in front of her. “Sit”.

“Alright”, I sit on the ground in front of her. “What a-”

“Shhh”.

I nod. I watch as Luna pulls some cards from behind her back. She lays them down in front of me.

“Split them”.

“What?”

“Split. Them”.

“How? Like rip them? Divide them?”

Luna shrugs. “Your choice.”

“Uh”, I reach out. I grab one only to put it back. “I really don’t understand. If you could be more cl- ow”.

Luna suddenly hits me on the head. From behind me I hear a low growl.

I look over my shoulder. Standing a few feet behind me is Lexa who glares at Luna.

“If you’re going to growl then I can’t help”, Luna glares back.

Sighing Lexa moves over to a rock and takes a seat.

Luna looks back at me. “You depend on rules too much. It’s always “what do you need me to do again?” or “what am I supposed to do” or “are there rules”. No one is going to give you rules all the time and instructions so”, she motions to the cards. “Split them.”

I look at the cards. I put certain colors together. With the flowers that can’t be grouped and are a mix of colors I put them between groups. “There”.

I hear Lexa snicker but she quickly covers her mouth when I look at her.

“What?”

Luna blinks at me. “You… you’re lucky you’re cute”.

“I sorted them”.

“Yes you did in an interesting way but the wrong way.”

“You said-”

“I said people wouldn't be able to always give rules, not that they aren’t expecting you to do it a certain way”. She gathers the cards.

“Or you’re just a bad teacher”, I mumble.

Luna swats me on the head. “Some of these are poisonous while others are non-poisonous. Do you know which ones?”

I shake my head. 

“Great”, she glances at Lexa. “This is going to take a while”.

****************

“Ok”, Luna sighs. “One more time. Are you listening?”

I nod.

“Positive?”

“Yes”.

She points at a plant. “This is mauvaise plante”.

I nod. 

“Meaning?”

“Bad plant”.

She nods. “Now”, she points at another card. “Dangerous?”

I look at the card. “It’s the same plant”.

“So if it is the same plant then is it dangerous?”

“Yes”, I shake my head.

“No!”, she throws the card. “Now you’re dead because you didn’t eat a plant that could’ve saved your life thinking it was a poisonous plant!”.

I grab the card. Looking at one card and to the other I try to see the difference. I look at Lexa who is watching me. Putting her head in one hand she meets eyes with me. She doesn’t have to say anything for me to know what she’s asking. 

“You ok?”

I hold out the card. “It’s the same thing”.

Lexa shakes her head. “No, lo- Clarke, it’s not.”

Sitting back I look back at the card. “It’s the same thing!”

“No!”, Luna snatches the card. “This glows a faint blue in the dark

I grab the card. Looking at one card and to the other I try to see the difference. “And how am I supposed to know this based on some dumb card!”

“You would notice if you were lost at night!”

“What if I am lost in the morni-”

“This isn’t what ifs!”

“They’re the same thing!”, I shout at her. “They. Are. The. Same. Thing!”.

“No!”, Luna snatches the card. “This one,  the one you could eat, glows a faint blue in the dark or if you squint there’s a small vein on the side”. She grabs the other one. “Do you see any of that on here?”

“No”, I mumble.

“Exactly! Pay attention!”

“I am!”

“No you are not”, she sighs. “Ugh”, tugging on her own hair she stands up. “I have to get some air.”

I watch Luna walk away. She heads over to the stream where she stares at the water. She’s frustrated and it is obvious. Refusing to look at Lexa I continue studying the plants. I really see no difference between them. Maybe I have bad eyes.

Behind me I can hear the group of girls giggling among one another. I know they’re talking about me but I tell myself to ignore them.

“Who doesn’t know plants? Little kids know that”.

“Shh, she’s Skaikru. They don’t know much”.

Turning I look at Lexa. She’s already looking at the girls. I know she isn't going to say anything. Sometimes she makes it clear when she is going to say something or not, other times she keeps it a secret as the situation unfolds.

**_With a low growl my wolf puts in her two cents. “She’s testing you”. “No one wants a weak mate”._ **

That makes sense. I can’t always depend on her to protect me though it would be nice.

_ The girls aren’t wrong. I can’t remember any of these dumb plants. _

I look back at the cards.

_ None of these make sense! _

Letting anger get the best of me I stand up and go back into the tent. I can hear the females snicker as soon as I’m inside. Wanting to get away from them I go to the bedroom and crawl under the bed. Once the darkness has surrounded me I close my eyes allowing more of it in.

With my eyes closed plants swarm in front of my eyes. The Skaikru fence makes a few appearances. I can hear someone screaming as a body falls to the floor.

_ Why? _

**********

“Clarke”.

I know that voice. I know who it is but I want her to leave. I want her to leave me alone and let me die under this dumb bed. Death is the best option, especially if I can’t make a place for myself in this camp.

Scooting further under the bed I wait for Lexa to leave.

“Do you want to come out?”

No response.

“There’s food”.

“What kind?”, I whisper.

“You’ll see when you come out.”

Peeking out from under the bed I look up at Lexa. “Really?”. I push out from under the bed and walk into the kitchen. On the table there’s plenty of dessert. Among them are a few of my favorites. “How?”

“There’s a few dessert places around here. I thought this would make you happy”.

“Buildings seem to appear from out of nowhere”.

Lexa shrugs. “I’ve only shown you the main part of the camp. Walking down a path and taking a few turns will lead you to another part”.

“Where are we in this… system?”

“We’re the center of the big camp. Obviously”.

Looking back at the desserts I spot a few familiar but never tasted desserts. “Thank you”, I smile at Lexa. Taking a seat I go straight for my favorite dessert. “This is amazing”.

“Glad you like it”. She’s trying to sound happy but fails at doing so.

I don’t say anything about it hoping she’ll tell me herself but when she looks away from me I know she won’t. “Hey”, I move towards her. Leaning forward I whisper, “what’s wrong?”

“I overheard those girls”

“Oh?”

“I’m sorry about them”.

I shrug. “It’s nothing”.

“No it’s not. I see how much it bugs you and how this strange conflict shines in your eyes”. She moves back. “You get confused at times… which you should considering your current situation. And I know you’re trying because you want to make a name for yourself here or you may never fit in-”

“You’re stalling”.

With a long sigh she finally looks at me. “I don’t want you to think I am offering this or even want this as a way to make things easier for you, that’s not what this is.”

“What is ‘this’?”

“Clarke, I’ve always had this strange liking towards you. Not because of us being potential mates but because you’re different. I knew as soon as I saw you in the forest. I’d hate to force anything on you”, she takes a second to pause. “I want a relationship with you. I really, really do”.


	29. Fun Chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will have dates that will jump around. I just thought I would write this so the memories Clarke brings up make sense. I guess. I don’t know. It still is part of the story but it’s not a big plot device.

September 26th, 5057

“Don’t do anything dumb”.

Smoothing down my shirt I walk to the edge of the bedroom to listen.

“Luna, I won’t. It’s just a simple walk”.

“But you have things to do Lexa and you’ve been putting them off. Th-”

“Luna, I know”. Lexa sighs. “I will get everything under control just let me have today”.

I step out of the bedroom.

“I promise, I’ll start focusing come tomorrow”. Lexa gives Luna a look before looking at me. “Shall we go?”

**********

Taking a few steps ahead of me Lexa jumps onto a fallen tree. “Y’know”, she starts rocking back and forth on her feet as she looks at me. “I’ve never done this”.

“This?”. I climb over the fallen tree and stand in front of Lexa. “What’s this implying?”

“The walk in the forest thing. I’ve gone into the forest with someone, once, before but there were always intentions or goals”.

I take a look around. I’ve never been in this part of the forest. “I can tell”.

“That obvious?”, she jumps down. 

“Well most people don’t talk about previous hookups while with their…”, I tilt my head back and forth.

“Girlfriend?”

I look at her, my eyes wide. “Is that what I am?”

Lexa shrugs. “I… I would say”.

“Hmm”. I start walking knowing Lexa will follow. “Then what did you do?”

“Well, with previous relations I always stuck our relationship to the bed.”

“So you were sex friends?”

“You could say that. I mean sure, they loved me. I just never had an interest towards them.”

“Yep, sex friends.”

Catching up to me she nudges me on the shoulder. “Jealous?”

I shake my head. “Not at all”. Coming to a stop I look at her. “Can I be honest with you?”

She nods.

“I’ve never dated before. Obviously… so this is as new to me as it is you”.

Lexa eyes me. Without saying anything she walks ahead of me and picks up a flower. When she turns to me she holds it out. “Hold still”.

“Why?”, I step back. 

“Trust me”, she smiles. She steps forward. With a strange gentleness she smooths down my hair and puts the flower into my hair. Her hands fall away from the flower and to the end of my hair. I watch as one of Lexa’s hands makes a small braid like it is nothing.

I look up at her hair which has it’s usual complicated braid. “You do that?”

“Do what?”

“Your hair”.

She nods. “Yeah”.

“So you can do hair”.

She nods again. “I taught myself”, she glances at me. “I had to since my mom… she uh… she wasn’t present in my life but she was there”.

I can see Lexa isn’t ready to talk about it so I reach up to touch the flower knowing it will distract her.

Immediately her hand slaps my hand away from the flower. “You’ll mess it up.”

“Sorry?”

“Now, do you remember what that plant looked like?”

I look up at her. “Are you really going to turn this into a lesson?”

When Lexa looks at me I can see all romantic intentions have gone out the window.

Sighing I shake my head. “No, I did not”.

“Course. Well over here we got…”

September 28th, 5057

When I woke up Lexa was already gone. It’s a change from the previous times she woke me up. Usually I wake up to her hands on my arm.

I step into the kitchen and spot the note.

“Had to work, be out before 12”.

“Work”, I look around. “I have the morning to myself”.

**_“Yay?”_ **

I toss the note onto the floor and leave the tent. Once outside I get the common glances from people. They range from curious to disgusted. The group of girls glare at me as I walk by. However, when I walk by a woman she smiles.

Shocked, I look away to prevent myself from staring. To my right another woman is smiling at me. She even waves at me. 

_ Why are they smiling? _

I head over to Mackel’s stand to get some cake. As he’s handing over the cake I remember what Lexa said last night after dinner.

September 27th, 5057

(Late at night)

“I see Mackel has taken a liking towards you”.

I look up from my plate. Tilting my head I try to read Lexa’s face but she hides whatever emotions she should be showing.

_ She does that a lot. _

I pick my next words carefully. “Yes, he is one of the few people who are nice to me”.

“He’s like that with everyone”.

“But it is nice to have someone smile at me”.

“He’s like… 80 years old”.

“Still smiles at me”.

Lexa sighs. “I don’t like that guy Clarke, especially when it’s you guys alone.”

“Do you think I-”

“Clarke”, she looks at me. “I don’t like that guy. And for your sake I won’t explain why just please don’t go over there alone or even for a few days in a row.”

“Your caution makes no sense but ok”.

“Ok?”

“Yes”. I stand up. I find that my appetite has disappeared.

September 28th, 5057

I take a small step away from Mackel hoping he won’t notice. “Hey, Mackel?”

“Yes?”

“Why are people… I don’t know”.

“Smiling at you?”

I nod.

He smiles at me. “I tell you while back”. “You cause Heda big smile”.

“So that’s why they’re smiling at me?”

“Happy Heda mean no yell at pack. No yell make happy people. You bring happy, yeah?”

I look around. I do notice a few guards are beyond happy. They usually never smile. “I’ll see you later Mackel”.

He nods.

I walk away from the stands and take a seat on a bench.

“For me”. Someone grabs the food.

“Hey- Costia.”

Costia smiles at me. “Hey blondie, where’s your big bad wolf?”

“Come again?”

“You know. Your bodyguard. The reason you aren't dead. If it wasn’t for her people would be… eating you”.

I growl at her but make no move to attack her. 

“Down dog”, she takes a huge bite from the cake. “Delicious”.

A familiar smell wraps around me. It's the smell of the forest in the morning, just as the sun is rising. A smell I have come to know and like.

“Oh hey”, Costia smiles. She walks over to Lexa, handing me the cake as she passes. “You come to see me?”

Lexa ignores Costia. She looks at the cake I now hold. “Clarke”, she growls.

I turn away. “I didn’t have breakfast and I wasn’t sure how long you would take”.

Pushing Costia away Lexa walks over to me. She leans forward so only I can hear her. “Wanna go to the library?”

I look up at her. “Why?”

She shrugs. “C’mon”.

**********

“It’s not that funny”, I shove Lexa. Ignoring me she keeps laughing, the tears springing to her eyes.

“Sorry, sorry”, she takes the book. “I could teach you our language if you want. I know I have done some before but you can’t go around mispronouncing”.

“I know that”. I move over to a shelf. I try to read the titles but none of them are in english.

“Look at this book”.

I don’t respond.

“Clarke?”

“Huh?”. I move further away from Lexa as I browse the books. 

“Are you mad?”, Lexa walks over to me. She leaves the book on top of a few other books on the shelf. “I’m sorry”.

“I’m not mad”, I smile at her. “Just browsing”.

Reaching out she brushes her fingers along a lock of hair. “Did you find a book?”

I nod. “This one”, I hold out a book. “It’s in English… I think”.

“Good”.

Holding onto the book I follow Lexa out of the library. She leads me over to a tree that happens to be out of sight from everyone. “Sit. Sit”.

Plopping down in the shade I open the book. When I open the book I’m surprised to find it’s in English. “Wow”.

Lexa lies down, her head on my lap. Smiling up at me she says, “it’s English”.

“Yeah”.

“It says on the side.”

“It says that in… Treglascend”.

Lexa laughs. “Trigedasleng”.

“Bless you”.

Lexa shakes her head, her smile still on her face. We don’t say anything else as we fall into a comfortable silence. I begin to read the book while Lexa looks at the sky.

_ This is nice. _

September 30th, 5057

A cold wet nose brushes against my face. Laughing, I push Lexa away from me. “Lexa”, I grumble.

A whine comes from her. She presses her nose against my cheek.

“Fine”. I roll over and sit up. Moving on the bed I look at Lexa who is now human. “You look different.”

“Do I?”

“Yes”. Moving away from Lexa I sit on the edge of the bed. “What are we doing today?”

“We?”

I look over my shoulder. “Oh, I’m sorry. I kinda assume…”

Lexa eyes me before she smiles. “I don’t know. I didn’t plan the day. There’s nothing to do”.

I look at her hands which are breaking apart a small braid she did only to rebraid it. I reach up and take my hair out the bun. “Braid it?”

Lexa smiles. She moves forward.

As she’s braiding it I realize just how empty this place is. The minutes pass by as I imagine what could be in this tent. How beautiful it could be.

Moving forward I yelp as my hair is suddenly pulled.

“Are you ok?”. Lexa gives my head two pats. “Don’t move”.

“We should decorate this place”.

“Hmm?”

“Your tent. Today's activity should be decorating it or adding some things.”

“I don’t decorate Clarke”. Lexa moves so she’s sitting by me. “Your hair is done.”

“But I want to decorate it… with you”.

*********

Flopping onto the couch I look around.

“Like it?”. Lexa leans against the table.

“It’s a start. If anything goes according to plan then maybe I could…”, I trail off. 

**_“Could?”_ **

“Nevermind”, I shake my head. 

“Ok… well I got you something”. Lexa holds out a mug.

“Lexa”, I smile. Standing up I take the mug from her. “It’s amazing. So cute. It’s mine?”

“Yeah… felt you should have your own mug”.

“I love it”.

(This is part of the plot)

  
September 30th, 5057

(late at night)

********

(Raven’s POV)

“Prey has been scarce”. A guard, who is supposed to be silent, starts whispering.

Moving deeper into the shadows I lean forward to try and listen.

“Didn’t Abby set out traps to get prey?”

“She’s not happy about it. She prefers live and fresh prey”.

_ Traps? _


	30. Chapter 30

Ever since Lexa and I started… dating, secretly of course, we’ve been spending more and more time together. I’ve gotten used to her presence and she would say the same about me. Though I can say we’ve gotten used to each other a while back. We’ve spent some time walking in the forest, of course she taught me things as we walked. We’ve spent times in the library laughing at dumb things. There were times when we would sit in the shade doing our own thing. I would read the occasional book in English while Lexa relaxed. Sometimes she’d help translate a book.

Not to mention Lexa let me change the layout of her tent a bit. She even updated it and got a new bed. A few candles were thrown out and it’s not as bland anymore. I even got my own mug. Though Costia has a strange habit of drinking out of it and leaving lipstick stains. Gross.

October 1st, 5057

I stare at my cup. There’s a red lipstick stain on the rim. She only took a sip out of the punch that is filing half of the cup. 

_ I hate that girl. _

“Clarke?”

Turning to Lexa I hold out my cup. “She did it again”, I whine. 

Lexa reaches out. She takes the cup and looks at the lipstick stain. “I’ll talk to her. I’ll tell the guards to not let her wander in without someone’s permission”.

“And she drank all the punch!”

“We can buy more”.

“Not of that kind”.

“Clarke”, Lexa sets the cup down. She approaches me. Reaching out she places her hands on my shoulders before bringing me into a hug. “You’re tired. You haven’t slept today. Go take a nap”.

“But I’m not tired”, I lean back in her arms. “I’m not tired”.

Lexa gives me a look. Leaning forward she places her forehead against mine. “Hmm”.

“Hmm?”

“Someone’s coming”, she steps away from me.

_ So? _

“Hey Lexa”, Luna walks into the tent. “I came to tell you that I’m leaving.”

“Have fun”.

“Leaving? Where?”

“The forest”.

I glance at Lexa. “I’m coming”. Grabbing my shoes I slip them on.

“No, you’re not”.

Turning to Lexa I find her leaning against the counter. She has my now clean cup in her hand. “Why not?”

“You’re still wanted”.

“I’ll be with Luna.”

“That’s not the point”.

“We’ll stay on the territory”.

“Pfft”, Lexa shakes her head. “Sure you will”.

“I will”, I approach Lexa. “Trust me.”

Lexa gives me a look. She has a look of defeat. Stepping towards me she leans forward and whispers, “stay safe”.

****************

“So you got your own mug”, Luna glances at me.

“Yeah, Lexa got annoyed that I kept using hers.”

“She never bought me a mug”.

I shrug. “Use hers until she does”.

“Costia does the same thing and she doesn’t have a mug”.

I look at Luna. “I don’t know what to say”.

Luna nods. She runs forward to walk ahead of me. “We’re picking plants. Stuff like this”, she holds up a berry.

****************

“What about this one?”

No response.

“Luna?”, I turn around only to bump into her. “What’re you doing?”

“Shut up”, Luna whispers.

Confused, I look over Luna’s shoulder. A group of soldiers stand looking at us, weapons drawn and a scowl on their face. 

“Run?”, I whisper.

“Run”, Luna whispers. “Definitely run!”, she yells.

Both Luna and I turn and run towards camp. Luna turns into a wolf and looks over her shoulder. She eyes me before turning back to a human.

“Say you can turn.”

“Nope.”

“ You did it before!”

“That was by accident!”

“You seemed in control!”

“Well my wolf is in heaven right now!”

**_Running back and forth my wolf dives and nips at Lexa’s wolf. They roll around playing with one another._ **

Luna whispers something like a curse word. “Just keep running”.

From behind us we can hear the angry shouts of the soldiers.

Luna and I burst through the bushes and into the camp. I’m surprised to see Lexa by the barrier.

“Brunette!”, I run over. She has to step back when our bodies collide. Gripping onto her shirt I look behind me. When I hear the guards getting closer I hide behind her.

Lexa lifts her arm and looks at me. I can tell she’s confused but before she can say anything the soldiers burst through the bushes.

“Heda”, one of them says confused.

“Azra”, Lexa responds. “May I ask why you are chasing my apprentice?”

“That”, Azra points at me. “Is your apprentice.”

“Y-”   
“I’m a woman! Not a that!”, I shout over Lexa’s shoulder.

Azra growls and takes a step towards. “Say that again”, he growls.

“I’m a woman”, I repeat. “I ain’t no that, you dirty mutt!”

Growling Azra runs towards me. Trikru guards step in his way. 

“Azra”, Lexa warns. Her pheromones waft through the area.

I hide again. “He’s gonna kill me.”

“He won’t kill you”, she whispers to me.

“How do you kno-”

“Your apprentice was on our territory stealing food!”

Lexa looks at me. She has a look that says “really?” and “I’m gonna kill you”. “I’m sure it was some mistake. She is new to the forest”, she turns back to Azra.

“Bullshit, Luna led her there.”

Lexa looks at Luna. “Seriously?”

Luna shrugs. “The kid was curious.”

“I'm 18”, I mumble under my breath.

“Azra, this was an honest mistake. It won’t happen again. So please, take your men off my territory before something happens.”

Azra huffs. “Don’t let it happen again.”

“She said it won’t”, I say loud enough for Azra to hear.

Azra growls. “Listen you little shit. I know you’re Skaikru, I know people are looking for you. It only takes a few words and you’ll be whisked away.”

Stepping forward Lexa looks him in the eyes. “Say those few words and your people will be dead in a matter of days”.

Azra looks from Lexa to me. “Watch yourself”, he mumbles.

“You can’t touch me you bald bastard”.

I gasp when Lexa suddenly elbows me in the stomach. She nods to Azra to let him know he can leave. She waits until they’re gone before turning to me. She’s mad.

“I can explain”, I whisper.

Lexa doesn’t respond. She turns on her heels and heads straight for the tent. At first I stay where I am thinking I’m safe but she yells over her shoulder “get over here”.

When I walk into the tent Lexa is leaning against the counter. She watches me closely, noticing every step I take. I move over to a chair and take a seat.

“Well?”

I don’t respond. 

“Do you want to take this time to explain?”

“I… I followed Luna”, I glance at her. “She said we were safe.”

“Oh so it’s Luna’s fault?”

“I didn’t say that”.

“You’re suggesting it!”

I prevent myself from flinching. 

“You should know the property line. You studied it. You have to be more careful or you’ll get caught”.

“I… I know”.

“Yes, you know but you don’t register it. There are people out looking for you as we speak and I’m trying to keep you safe as I try to figure out what to do so my mate doesn’t end up getting taken not only ruining my life but yours too. Do you know how shitty I would feel if you were caught and I never got to see you again? Do you? It sucks! So please do us all a favor and for the love of god stay on the goddamn territory!”

I don’t respond.

“Am I understood?”

Mumbling a response I keep my eyes on the ground.    
“Clarke!”

I turn my head away from Lexa. “Yes, I understand”.

Lexa takes a minute to breathe. I feel a hand against my cheek. It’s a gentle touch. “Clarke, look at me.”

I look up at her with wary eyes. 

“I’m sorry if I was harsh”, she eyes me. “I… I don’t enjoy yelling at you or even being mad for that matter but please be more careful. You’re still wanted by a whole clan so don’t go pissing off other clans. Ok?”

“Fine”.

With both hands on my cheeks Lexa’s thumbs move back and forth in a soothing motion. She gazes down at me with a loving look. “Clarke, I…”

“Yes?”

Shaking her head she smiles. “Nevermind.”

I reach up and place a hand over hers. “What is it?”

Her thumb lightly brushes against my bottom lip. “May I?”

Looking up at her I stare into her eyes. I try to find anything that would betray her but there’s nothing there. “Yeah”.

Wasting no time Lexa leans in and presses her lips against mine. Moving her hands off my cheek she places them somewhere.

“Mmm”. I lean into the kiss.

Lexa suddenly breaks the kiss. I’m about to ask what’s wrong when she pushes me back. Stumbling, I fall onto the couch.

I watch as she walks behind the couch and sits on the back. She keeps her back to me and doesn’t say anything.

I don’t know how to react so I stay still. I want to ask a million questions but someone walks into the tent.

“Uh…”, Luna looks at me then to Lexa. She seems frazzled and scared.

“You ok?”, I use my elbows to support myself as I look at her.

“Lexa, can I talk to you?”

“Talk”, Lexa growls. 

“Alone?”

“Talk”, she repeats. I suddenly feel warm as Lexa’s anger radiates from her. I’m not sure why she is mad when just a minute ago she was happy.

Luna digs her foot into the ground. “Well… I was mad at myself for… dangering Clarke. I know how much she means to you right now and I’m sorry about that. Truly. I didn’t thi-”

Looking over her shoulder Lexa looks Luna in the eyes. The white of her eyes slowly turn red as her wolf starts coming to the surface.

Luna swallows a lump in her throat. “Anyways. A group of kids wanted to go out of the camp so I took them and they got curious about Skaikru since Clarke is here. We went there and one kid may have..”

“May have?”

“Pissed the leader off”.

I sit up. Luna glances at me.

“And she may be coming over here to yell at you”.

“What did he do?”, Lexa looks away.

“Nothing too bad. She’s much more mad that we were on their territory but he scared some prey off and marked his territory on their territory”.

Lexa growls. Her nails dig into the couch. Frustrated she gets off the back of the couch. “Who was it?”

“Lexa-”

“Who!”, she shouts.

I flinch away from Lexa. Her Alpha radiates to the point it burns. She releases pheromones that make me whimper and want to submit. Not able to handle it I get off the couch and step away from her.

Luna looks away. She bows her head, her head also tilts a bit to the side revealing her neck in submission. “It was Timothy”, she whispers.

The pheromones get stronger. As they get stronger the urge to submit does too. I know for an Omega to submit they have to get on their knees and reveal their neck. They avoid eye contact as they slowly heat up from the pheromones. There’s other ways that I know of. One of them involves taking off clothes to show the Alpha you’re being vulnerable.

“So not a kid. Upcoming guard”, Lexa whispers. Sighing, she runs her nails through her hair. “Keep Clarke safe. I’m going to wait outside for Abby and her men then I’ll deal with Timothy”.

Luna nods. “Let’s find a wig or something. Maybe get you a different set of clothes. Just in case you have to leave the tent”.

I speak up since the pheromones are fading. “You don’t know how dangerous the leader is”.

“Every leader is dangerous”, Luna tries to get me to walk. “Now let’s go”.

“You don't understand”.

“Clarke”.

“I know her, she’s my mother. I know she isn’t mad about the territory. She probably assumes I am here. She’ll want to search everything. Everyone.”

“You’re the leader’s daughter?”. Lexa gives me a cold look from over her shoulder.

“I’m sorry…”

Lexa growls again. This is gonna stress her out even more.

“We’re hiding a leader’s daughter!”, Luna glares at Lexa.

“Leader’s daughter or not, keep her safe”. With that she leaves the tent.

Luna grabs my wrist and drags me into the room. As she digs through clothes she mumbles to herself.    
“This is all my fault”, she throws a shirt. “I shouldn’t have taken you anywhere or let those kids leave the camp. Let alone let Timothy pee on a tree”.

“He had to pee”.

Luna growls. She throws some clothes at me. When she leaves the tent I change into the clothes. When she comes back she throws dirt at my hair and runs it through my hair. It makes my hair look darker than it is.

“Hold still”, with shaky hands she applies black makeup on me. “There. That’s the best I can do”.

“Can I go outside?”

“No, we don’t want to risk it”.

“But-”

“Lexa has everything handled. Though if you stand close enough to the tent entrance you can see through it”.

****************

“Skaikru! Skaikru!”. An older kid rushes the younger ones into their huts and tents. As he does he shouts the warning out to adults. Once adults hear him they drop what they are doing and go to their tents and huts. Wives make sure their children are safe while husbands stand outside their homes watching the approaching Skaikru.

“Is it always like this?”, I whisper to Luna.

“Not at first. At first we were curious”.

As they get closer the wives begin to peak out of their homes. A few husbands make them go back in while others grab their hands.

Looking away from them I turn to the Skaikru people. At the front are two guards who have their guns raised. They point them at anything and everything that moves, even the things that stand still.

Behind them is Abby and Octavia. Walking by them are guards who are less on guard. The guards behind them are on the defense as much as the front guards are.

“Abby”, Lexa nods.

Abby nods back. She takes a look around the camp searching for something… or someone. “I assume you know why I am here”.

“I have been informed”.

“Great”. Her eyes linger on tents and huts. “Why were your people on my territory?”

“The kids were curious. Though I was not informed of their leaving or territory crossing”.

“I can tell”, she eyes Lexa. “One brat marked a tree”.

“So I have heard and I apologize. I will deal with him in a given moment or two”.

“How are you going to do that?”

“That doesn’t concern you”, Lexa growls. At her growl a few guns point at her.

Panic rushes through me.

_ No. _

“It does concern me and I wish to know”. Abby takes another look around.

Lexa, wanting them to leave, nods. “Timothy. Come forward”.

A boy with shaggy blonde hair steps forward. You can see he’s nervous but he puts on a brave face. “Heda”, he nods to her.

“Timothy”. Lexa glances at Abby who is happily watching. “It is true you were with the group of people who left camp?”

He nods.

“It is true you went onto Skaikru territory?”

Another nod.   
“Is it also true you marked your territory?”. Her words come out in a snarl.

Timothy nods again. “Yes Heda. It is true”.

“Why would you do that?”

“I… I thought it would be funny”.

Lexa doesn’t say anything else. Instead her right hand nails extend into claws. When seeing this a mom bursts into tears. She screams sobs as she begs Lexa not to do it.

I look at Luna who is looking at the ground. “What’s she gonna do?”

“You’ll see”, she whispers.

Looking back at Lexa I see she’s coldly looking at Timothy.

Timothy’s eyes go to her claws then to the forest. “Heda”, he whispers. “I… I thank you for all you have taught me. I do wish I could’ve stayed here longer”. He bows and with no more words walks out of the camp and into the forest.

Lexa’s claws shift into nails. “You should be leaving too”, she addresses Abby.

“Guess I should”. Abby turns and starts walking away. She comes to a stop. “Though I have to ask”.

Lexa’s eyes flash to the tent. “What?”

“You haven’t seen a blonde around?”

“Can’t say I have”.

“She wasn’t here even for a few seconds? Minutes?”

Lexa doesn’t respond. She taps her chin a few times. “I do remember stumbling across her in the Flouku territory at one point. We exchanged words then she was gone. Why?”

“You just smell of her”.

Lexa eyes Abby. “I didn’t even notice”.

“And I feel no wolf in you”, Abby glances at Lexa. “It is as though it has left your chest to dance with another.”

“Are you accusing me of something?”

Abby shakes her head. “I wouldn’t dare”.


	31. Note

I am so sorry for the lack of updates 😔

This week has just been... a mess for better words. Many events happening here and there, going out at night to have fun, getting home late then waking early to attend studies. And then repeat.

I'll update tomorrow (four chapters, maybe a bonus if I find a topic I like) then everything will be a normal update schedule. Once again, I am sorry.


	32. Chapter 32

********

(Abby’s POV)

Without looking back I leave Trikru camp and start walking back to camp. To my right I can hear the Trikru kid that got kicked out walking away from the camp. He seems to be walking away from us.

“They just kick people out?”

I look over to Octavia. She’s looking over her shoulder as she walks.

“Did Lincoln not talk about them?”

At the mention of his name she looks at me, her eyes wide. “I… he didn’t say much”.

“Figured”. I spare one last glance to the camp. “He didn’t seem to be a big fan of Trikru. What happened anyways?”

“He didn’t say much”. Octavia’s voice has an outline of warning and a threat.

_ Someone doesn’t want to talk about their mate. _

October 2nd, 5057

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“Leeexa!”

An all too familiar voice sings towards Lexa. Their voice seems to be coming from the kitchen.

_ No. _

“Leeexa, oh Lexa”.

Groaning I lift my head off Lexa’s shoulder to look around. Everything has a fuzzy outline but I can still make out my surroundings just enough to see a smiling redhead at the entrance of the bedroom.

I nudge Lexa.

“Out”, she mumbles still asleep.

I nudge her again. “Lexa”.

As a response Lexa digs her nails into my back. She presses hard enough to cause a reaction but not hard to break any skin. Arching my back I escape her nails.

“Lexa”, I lightly shover her shoulder. “She’s in the kitchen-”, I perk up and look around the tent. A million red flags go off my head.

**_“Bad”. My wolf leaps onto her feet, her ears flat as she growls at the enemy._ **

I jump when Lexa’s hand touches my arm. I should be used to her doing that, she does it every morning. It’s like she needs as much contact as she can get in the morning.

“You ok?”

Pushing away from her I climb out of bed and leave the bedroom.

“Morning b-”

“Shut it”. I walk past Costia and outside. Walking to the edge of the tent I look into the forest trying to figure out what is setting me off.

“Clarke”, Lexa walks up to me. She reaches for my hand but I pull it away. “We should go back”.

I know Lexa catches the same movement in the shadows. I move to take a step forward but she grabs my wrist. With a tug she pulls me towards her.

“Guards!”

It doesn’t take a second for the guards to come running over. They make a small circle around Lexa and I, their weapons pointed at the forests.

“Show yourself!”, one guard shouts. “Now!”

“It’s just me”. A person steps out of the shadows. “It’s me, Timothy”.

Lexa growls.

“I… I am here to accept the marking.”

“Marking?”, I glance at Lexa.

**********

“Luna”, I walk over to her. “What is a marking?”

Luna, who is digging through some herbs, glances at me. “Hold this will ya?”

I don’t get to reject as she hands me a pile of leaves. “L-”   
“One minute”.

Time slowly passes by as Luna sorts through stuff mumbling to herself as she does.

“Luna!”, I snap. “I am not going to stand her holding useless leaves waiting for you to tell me the simple answer!”

“Hand me those”.

I hand them over.

“Ok, now do you need to know?”

“Luna!”, I step towards her. Leaning forward I make sure she can hear me clearly. “Seems like you’re doing something important. Like it may take a day or so to complete”.

Luna doesn’t respond.

“It only takes one smell to make Lexa come running. I can stall her and say things to waste your time and put you behind on your duties or-”

Luna holds up her hand. “Ok, what type of marking do you want to know about?”

“Timothy came back to camp earlier and said he would accept the marking”.

“Oh, that type. Hmm well in simple terms it means Lexa will scratch him, a deep wound, in a visible place that everyone can see. It automatically makes anyone of any gender hold a social status of… lower than an Omega. It means you have been shamed by the Alpha of your pack.”

“Won’t it heal?”

“Scars don’t heal”.


	33. Chapter 33

“Scars don’t heal”. Luna stands up and brushes herself off. With a sigh she rolls her neck. “Why are you asking me? I’m sure Lexa would’ve told you”.

“She said not to worry about it”.

“Of course she did. Help me with something?”

“I’m good. I was supposed to wait by the tent and-”

With a smile that sends chills down my spine Luna says, “Help me with something”. She turns away and disappears into a tent.

I look around before entering. Much to my surprise it’s not a tent that someone would claim as their home. There’s plants scattered and papers on tables. To my right a child sits on a chair reading a book. She looks up and smiles at me.

“Hi”.

I want to wave back but I notice her pupils hold no color.

_ She’s blind. _

“Hello”, I respond.

“Clarke, this is Label. She’s working under my guidance to become a healer”.

“Under your guidance?”

Luna nods.

“You’re a healer?”

She shrugs. “Depends on what type of healer you’re talking about”.

Moving away from Label whose, surprisingly, eyes follow me. “There’s only one type of healer. Or I uh… thought.”

“There’s quite a few healers. Nico, one of the healers here, is a physical healer. If you feel sick or have some wound you’d go to him. A doctor as your people call them.”

“And you are?”

“Emotional healer. Simple way of putting it”.

I don’t say anything as Luna starts busying herself with stuff. She talks to Label in their own language. I find it strange how Label can move as though she can see. She knows where everything is.

“Luna”.

“Yes Clarke?”

“Why am I here?”

“Oh right”. She faces me. “I wanted to tell you something about Lexa. Something you may at times find frustrating but she has good intentions. Lexa doesn’t like to tell people certain things. Especially things they may want to know… it’s her way of protecting that person”.

I open my mouth to say something, to accuse her of something but someone walks into the tent. 

“Label”, a familiar voice breaks the silence. A nail runs down the back of my neck then back up. I feel her fluff out my hair before she starts playing it. “What’re you doing in here?”, she whispers in my ear, her hot breath tickling my ear.

Despite Lexa and I never doing anything close to sexual, we haven’t even talked about it, her whispering and the thought that she’s close enough sends pleasurable shivers all over. They settle between my thighs.

“Well?”

“I was helping Luna”.

“By standing?”

I turn to face Lexa. “How did you know I was in here?”

“Instinct”, she shrugs.

“Lexa”.

She eyes me. “Your people don’t talk about their wolves much, right?”

“They don’t talk about it at all. Why?”

“It shows”.

“You’re avoiding the previous question”.

“Your scent sticks out more than others. Simple as that”. Seeing I’m confused she smiles and shakes her head. “Forget it.”

I look away from her.

_ Why must I be so dumb in these type of situations. I know nothing of wolves. _

“Wanna play a game?”

**********

“Make your move”, Lexa hums. She has a smile on her face as she looks at me. 

“I’m thinking”.

Faking a yawn she leans back on her hands. “This year love”.

“Oh hush”. I reach out to move a piece. “And since when did you start calling me love?”

“You’re stalling”. When I begin to move the piece Lexa gives me a look.

“Not that one?”, I put the piece back.

She shrugs.

“Then…”, I reach for another. Another strange look. “Not that one either.”

“Love, chose.”

“I will”.

“Let me go!”

********

(Raven’s POV)

Slipping under the fence I take a quick look around before walking into the forest. Since it’s daylight I have to stick to the shadows and watch out for patrol. In the direction I am heading the patrol’s scent is very faint. They must have been here at least an hour ago.

I don’t know why I’m even out of the camp. There’s a low chance I’ll stumble across a Trikru person at this time, especially this close to the Skaikru border. Let alone run into Luna.

**_“But you have to tell her”._ **

_ Right, I have to tell her. I  _ have  _ to tell her. _

Taking a deep breath I step into Trikru territory. Immediately my senses heighten as my body goes into an alert mood. Surprisingly to my right is a trap. A skaikru trap that lies in their territory. Following the trap there’s more going in a straight line then scattering. 

_ Do we not have prey on our territory? _

Not wanting the traps to start some unnecessary war, I start messing with them. I set some off by dropping twigs into them and others by throwing rocks. Crouching by one I eye the way it works as I try to find a way to set them off in a quiet way.

“Hey!”

_ Shit. _


	34. Chapter 34

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“Make your move”, Lexa hums. She has a smile on her face as she looks at me. 

“I’m thinking”.

Faking a yawn she leans back on her hands. “This year love”.

“Oh hush”. I reach out to move a piece. “And since when did you start calling me love?”

“You’re stalling”. When I begin to move the piece Lexa gives me a look.

“Not that one?”, I put the piece back.

She shrugs.

“Then…”, I reach for another. Another strange look. “Not that one either.”

“Love, chose.”

“I will”.

“Let me go!”

Looking up from the chess board I look to the right entrance of the camp.

“Hold still”, a guard growls. Him and another guard drag in a screaming and kicking woman.

Lexa doesn’t have to say anything for me to know what to do. I climb over the chess board and over to her. Positioning myself behind her I peek around her and at the person. I feel my mouth hit the floor as I see a familiar Skaikru woman.

“I know that person”, I whisper.

Lexa glances at me. Before she can do anything I leap up and run over to Raven.

“Raven?”

Raven stops struggling. “Clarke?”

I nod. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing”.

“C’mon”, a guard goes to walk again.

“Let her go”, I say.

The guard looks uncertain as he glances at Lexa. She gives him a small nod. “If she gets away it’s your fault”, he growls at me. Once he lets Raven go she stretches out her arms.

“These people aren’t nice to guests”.

“I could say otherwise but agree at the same time”.

“There’s another one of them”, someone whispers.

“How many more will come?”

“How about we take this somewhere more private?”, Lexa approaches Raven but she keeps a few feet between them.

Taking a small step away from Lexa I lead Raven over to the healer tent. Once inside I have Raven take a seat before she starts asking questions.

“Where were you?”

“How could you stay here?”

“Why did you leave?”

“Do you know what kind of chaos you have caused?”

“There’s some serious shit…”, she trails off. “You”, she growls.

I look at the tent entrance. Luna smiles at me and waves at Raven. “Hello again”.

“You said you didn’t know of anyone. Of Clarke!”

“I had to lie”.

“You know each other?”, Lexa growls.

“It’s a long story”.

“Not really”, Raven shrugs. “You guys got anything to eat? I’m starving.”

I watch as Raven moves around digging through stuff. She tastes the occasional plant only to gag. “Not really”, I ask, wanting to know more about this long story.

“Well we met a while back, she led me to a stream after I fell in mud then we’ve been meeting up every night. Simple as that”.

Through the corner of my eye I see Lexa glaring at Luna. “Every night?”

“Well obviously. Night time is when people get their freak on”.

“Freak on?”   
I look from Luna to Raven. “Y’all aren’t… mates, right?”

“Pfft”, Raven looks at me. “Hardly. Clarke, I can’t have a mate. I don’t feel that mate bonding. She can. Your wolf won’t call out to someone who can’t call out to you”.

_ Betas are the most human of everyone. _

Lexa growling says, “but a wolf will call out to a Beta if they have lost their mate”.

“I haven’t lost my mate”, Raven eyes Lexa.

Based on the look on Luna’s face it must be her who lost her mate.

I have a feeling Lexa wasn’t supposed to say anything about that. The two glare at one another, Lexa looks read to tear her throat out.

“Hello! Still starving!”

“Guards, take her to a cell. I want at least four people watching her at a time”.

“What? You can’t do that!”

“Just did”.

I watch as Raven is dragged out of the tent. She yells for me to do something but I stay still. I would try and reason with Lexa but her eyes say everything I need to know; “try it and see what happens”.

“You promised”, Luna growls.

“You broke a rule”.

“You’ve been breaking a rule!”, she motions to me.

I step back.

“Sorry, Clarke. Don’t take it personally”. Luna shrugs.

“It’s… it’s fine”.

Lexa positions herself so I’m behind her. “Don’t you dare drag Clarke into this”.

“Oh so I can’t drag your mate in but you can drag mine in?!”

“Mine isn’t dead!”

**_Perking up my wolf takes a look around. For the first time Lexa’s wolf is nowhere to be seen. Whimpering she hides her face in her paws as she waits for this to end._ **

“Take that back”, Luna growls. She steps towards Lexa.

“Make me”, Lexa steps forward. They’re so close that their noses almost touch.

“Guys”, I try to interject. Almost immediately my wolf barks at me trying to get me to stay silent. This is one fight she doesn’t want to be involved in.

“You’re the one that put your mate in danger. You’re the one that only thought of yourself”, Lexa looks Luna in the eyes. “You have no one to blame but yourself for Isabelle’s death.”

I take a small step away. I can see Luna wants to attack Lexa but she can’t. Doing so would be a challenge.

Lexa, when Luna has shown a small sign of submission, turns and leaves the tent.

I go to follow only to stop. “I… I’m sorry what happened to your mate. I’m sure it wasn’t your fault… and I apologize for Lexa”.

Luna nods.

I walk out of the tent. To my surprise Lexa is sitting under the tree where the chessboard is. She plucks grass around her.

“Hey”, I sit by her.

“I know what you’re gonna say. I should apologize for saying those things.”

“I wasn’t gonna say that but it seems like you know you should.”

Lexa doesn’t respond.

I look down at the chessboard. “Here”, I point to a spot. I grab a chess piece and move it. “Right?”

“Wrong”, Lexa offers a sad smile. “Doing that has made it available for me to move this over here and now I have a checkmate”.

I frown. “I thought I had it”.

“You thought wrong”.

I hug my legs. “Where did they take Raven?”

“That’s her name”.

“Where did they take her?”

Lexa sighs. “The prison cells. There’s not much people in there so she practically has it to herself. The staff will treat her nice… we don’t believe in treating prisoners differently unless they have committed a horrible crime”.

“Won’t my camp notice though?”

Lexa shrugs. “I’ll handle that. Don’t worry about it”.

_ This is what Luna meant? _

“Ok”, I move towards her. “Next time I’m going to win”.

Lexa smiles. “Let’s test that right now”.

********

October 3rd, 5057

“Checkmate”.

“What? No!”, I lean forward. “You can’t do that!”

“I can and just did”.

“No, that’s not how this works”. I don’t hear Lexa’s response as I hear a cell door close. I watch as Luna walks away from the prison and back to her tent. “Why can’t I-”   
“Clarke”, Lexa warns. She glances up from the chessboard. She moves the pieces to the spots they belong.

I watch for a few seconds before saying, “just one visit”.

“No”.

“She can’t do anything. She’s a friend of mine.”

Lexa looks at me. “Let me think about it”.

“Shouldn’t she be able to make her own decisions”.

_ Raven. _

Lexa looks to her right. Through the crack between two cell bars Raven looks at Lexa. She has a smile on her face but her eyes say a different story.

Hoping to prevent some fight or keep both of them calm I say, “Raven, I can make my own decisions”.

“If that’s true then how about you stand up and come in here? Come and see your best friend. I miss talking face to face without rusty bars between us”.

“Another game?”, Lexa looks at me.

“Ah yes, a distraction from the real problem”, Raven looks at the chessboard. “When did you learn chess? I thought you hated the game”.

“I never hated the game. I didn’t want to play it because I never understood it”.

“And this… Trikru mutt taught you how to play?”

Lexa growls.

“She’s not a mutt and yes, she did teach me.”

“Yet you keep losing”.

I glance at the ground.

That much is true. I can’t win against Lexa.

“I have years of experience”, Lexa mumbles. She puts the last piece down. “Clarke doesn’t”.

Raven waits a few seconds to respond. “I have noticed something while sitting in this disgusting place. You two spend plenty of time together. You seem very fond of one another”.

No response.

“You’re the leader of these mutts right?”

No response.

“Oh I know. You like my friend. You wanna get that huh? I can’t blame you, she’s gorgeous”.

“Do you shut up?”, Lexa growls.

“Raven, please don’t piss people off”. I wait for Raven to say something but she looks at me. 

She stares into my eyes. I know this. I know what she is doing. We would do this back at camp. You innocently accuse the other of something and stare into their eyes. By staring you can spot the change of emotion or if they look away, they are guilty of something.

I’ve always been better at reading Raven than she can me though she won’t admit it. I reveal what I want to reveal and this is something I want to reveal.

I break eye contact and look at the ground.

“Oh, don’t tell me. Clarke!”

“What?”, I sigh.

“How could you! How could you fall in love with the enemy”.

Although Lexa looks like she’s calmly sitting, her eyes revealing nothing, acting like she didn’t hear nor cares about what was just said, she glances at me letting me know she’s listening. In the back of my mind, far in the distance, a voice speaks.

**_“You ok?”, Lexa, taking control of her wolf, looks at mine._ **

I know Lexa would handle this yet she’s giving me the opportunity to do something. Say something.

“Well Clarke?”, Raven glares at me. “Did you fall for a mutt?”

“Raven. For your sake I’m not going to answer that. You can come to whatever conclusion you want”.

“Y-”

“I’m done talking to you”.

“B-”

“I’m. Done”. I look at Raven for a second longer before standing up and walking away.

**********

I stand by Lexa who talks to Luna. The two seem to have forgotten their previous fight. Luna is even smiling. 

Of course as they talk I tune them out. I have to stand silently by Lexa as she talks. Not that that is what she told me to do. It is what I do. And I do it pretty well.

“You look like a scolded pup”.

_ Then there’s Raven. Finally let out of her cell, has to be by Luna 24/7 or she’ll go back in the cell. _

“Did the big bad wolf yell at you?”, Raven steps towards me. “You look different”.

I keep my eyes on the ground. Everything she says is registered in my brain yet I don’t understand any of it. It’s like there’s a cloud over my thoughts.

I feel warm although it’s windy and I’m shivering. 

“Clarke, are you ok?”

“Skaikru and Floukru are still fighting”, Lexa says to Luna. 

“That’s no surprise”, Raven looks at Lexa. “A woman I know is leading the fight. She won’t drop the subject since one of their men killed one of our people. Of course she fell back after you guys came to the aid but once your people left she continued.”

“And your leader?”

Raven doesn’t respond.

Luna nudges her. “C’mon”.

Everything finally registers. “She’s allowing it. My mom…”, more heat. More warmth. But I’m so cold.

**_Looking at my wolf I see she’s lying on the ground. Her breathing is fast as her tongue hangs out of her mouth. She looks just as hot as I feel._ **

Someone nudges me. I step away as the touch sets off sparks.

“Your mom?”, Lexa asks.

“I… I uh”, I shake my head. “I don’t know”.

“What the fuck did you do?”, Raven glares at Lexa.

Lexa raises her eyebrows.

“You did something to Clarke! You tortured her, huh? I know you did!”

As Raven shouts at Lexa for something my head starts to ring. Her yelling sounds so loud. I look at Lexa who is silently watching her yell.

**_“Shut up!”, my wolf growls. Anger swarms around her. “Just. Shut. Up!”_ **

“She didn’t hurt me”, I growl. I look at Raven. “I don’t… understand why you put her in the group of bad people but she’s not like that.”

“Maybe I would cut her some slack if you would tell me the truth”.

“What truth? The obvious truth? Yes, I am Lexa’s mate. Yes, I have accepted this. Yes, I came here of my own free will. And no, she doesn’t hurt me, note even fucking close”.

“I knew it! Clarke you know what this will do! You know how many people-”

“I know”, I mumble. “I know this”.

“Obviously not!”

“Would you stop yelling!”, I glare at her. “Please, stop.”

“Now you’ve gone soft. You can’t handle anger. The Clarke I know would stare her mother in the eyes as she screamed in her face.”

Raven voice bounces around my head. Not able to hand it I walk away and seek out somewhere quiet. I can feel my skin tear as I turn into a wolf. My wolf sniffs around, pushing past people and objects. In the distance she can hear Raven telling her something. Telling her to come back.

Ignoring her she flops down in the shade. It only takes minutes for us to fall into a peaceful slumber.

October 4th, 5057

(Early, before the sun has up)

********

(Lexa’s POV)

**_“Up”._ **

Groaning I roll over. With a groggy mind I try to push my wolf down so I can fall back asleep but she refuses.

**_“Up!”_ **

**Fuck off.**

**_“Get up!”_ **

I open my eyes to a fuzzy world. I can make a few things out. Such as the gentle glow of the candles and the blonde hair of Clarke. I look at her chest to watch the slow rising and falling, instead her chest rises and falls rapidly.

Opening my mouth I try to say something but nothing comes out. I move away from her and sit up.

Clarke doesn’t react to my movement. Her hand grips the bedsheet in a death grip as she tries to breathe.

“Clarke”, I find my voice. “Hey”, I touch her.

She flinches away.

“Hey, Clarke can you talk?”

She whimpers letting me know she’s listening.

_ Ok, this is fine. Clarke is shaking, breathing hard and can’t talk. This is fine. _

**_“This is not fine!”_ **

**Fuck off! I’m trying.**

“Hot”.

I move closer. “Hot?”

“It’s hot”, she whines. Turning she faces me. 

When I look into her eyes a fire lights up inside me. Her scent wraps around me. The usual sweet vanilla smell is suffocating. It fills the room until it’s all I can smell.

“Shit”, I move off the bed. Grabbing a shirt I press it to my nose to block out her scent. I breathe in the forest scent of my shirt as I look at Clarke. The look on her face says she knows. She knows she’s in heat.


	35. Fourth Wall??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarke's heat isn't a big thing. I can't remember why I included it. I mean it's not like a human period so technically if Lexa knotted Clarke before her heat she would still get pregnant but there's a 50% less chance since she's not as fertile. I don't really know. I think I included it cuz it tied into later chapters.

**********

“Clarke, I know you don’t want to but please, drink something”.

Clarke shakes her head. Weakly she pushes the glass away.

Although Clarke moans and pants everytime I touch her, I reach out and move her to a comfortable position.

“How”, she pants. “Does this end?”

“Usually with sex”.

Clarke’s eyes widen. She doesn’t say anything but she doesn’t have to.

“That’s the fast way of ending heat. It’s your first so it shouldn’t last too long. And you are young so today may be the only day”.

“And future?”

“It’ll last longer for sure. Most end it with sex… others fight through it. I know other Alphas will be desperate for you of course but that’s no big deal if I’m around.”

Clarke doesn’t respond. She points at the water.

“Now you want it?”

Clarke shrugs. 

“Lexa!”

“Not now!”, I shout back.

“But Lexa, you may want to hear this…”

I look at Clarke who nods at me. I lean forward, plant a quick kiss on her head and go to the tent entrance.

“This better be urgent”.

“It is”.

I look at Raven. “Well?”

“I… I don’t know what's going on in there and I hope I’m not interrupting. You better-”

“Get on with it”, I growl.

“It’s hot”, Clarek whines from inside. “Lexa”, she groans.

“One minute”.

“I didn’t want to say this”, Raven kicks at a rock. “But this person from my camp, Bellamy, was kicked out. He’s searching for Clarke and may be getting closer as we speak.”

“It’s one man”.

“Yes but Clarke is his ticket back inside. He has his only family inside that camp and will do anything to get back.”

I don’t respond.

“Just tell Clarke to be careful”.

********

(Raven’s POV)

“You should apologize to Clarke”.

Looking through the bars I stare at Luna. “And why is that?”

“It’s obvious something was off about her… emotionally. Yet you poked and prodded her.”

“I wasn’t getting answers”.

“You were being a jerk”.

“We do that to one another all the time”.

“Does she like it?”

“She’s never said anything before”.

“Doesn’t mean she likes it”.

“Also doesn’t mean she hates it”.

Luna stares at me. When she sees I won’t budge she sighs and looks away. “All I’m saying is… talk to her. Don’t force things or she’ll never tell you anything.”

“You don’t know Clarke”, I step forward so my body is pressed against the bars. “You may think you do but you don’t. Not Lexa, not you, not even her own mother. I do.”

Luna looks at me. “Which Clarke do you know?”

“What?”

“Which Clarke do you know?”

“The one everyone else knows. The one I grew up. The one who was afraid of the dark and would cling to me as she fell asleep. The one that despite everything being mean to her she would say the nicest things to them. That Clarke.”

“So Skaikru Clarke. Locked up Clarke. Has to watch what she says Clarke”, Luna moves towards me. “You know Clarke from a month ago. You don’t know free Clarke. You don’t Clarke who has found her mate and a home”.

“Your place is no home. Stop making her believe such lies”.

“They’re not lies”, Luna growls. “Clarke, despite not realizing it, has started making a name for herself. Until you come to realize that the Clarke you know has changed, your relationship will suffer”. Before I can respond Luna walks out of the prison leaving me alone.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“Are you sure you’re ok?”, Lexa grabs my hand. She eyes me before nodding. “Be careful”.

“I feel ok… I know it’s not over but I need some air”.

Lexa nods. I walk around her and leave the tent. Once I’m far from the tent I take a seat on a bench to take some time to breathe.

“I haven’t seen you all day”.

“Costia, please go away”.

Her evil hyena-like laugh cuts through the air. “No can do”.

“What do you want?”

“I want to talk to you. I worry about you”.

“Bullshit”.

“I was once in the same position as you”.

“Bullshit”.

“You went into heat right?”

I shrug. “Maybe”.

“So did I… when I was dating Lexa. Everything was going awesome. In love and then heat hit. Unlike you we have had sex before but this one was different. It meant my chances of having pups was raised by a million. And uh Lexa…”, Costia eyes me. “Might as well tell you. If Lexa did not achieve the pleasure she wanted then she would knot the person. It would bring her the high she wanted. But she couldn’t know me. Unless she wanted pups and she didn’t want that from me. With me”.

“What are you getting at?”

“For once I am trying to warn you. Lexa is everything everyone wants but she doesn’t want them. You think she loves you but you’re not aware of how many women she has said they could be her mate and she tricks them. Gets what she wants then finds a reason as to why she should leave them and she has plenty of reasons to leave you.”

“No she doesn’t”.

“Do you really think her wolf is attracted to a Skaikru woman? That she would want pups? Are you aware of many problems that would cause not only her but her parents and everyone else.”

“She’s not using me”, my voice cracks. I want to say this is one of her tricks but her eyes hold nothing but the truth. “No”, I scoot away. “You’re lying”, I hiss.

“Ok. I’ll tell you more clearly. Lexa has been told about someone hunting you in the forest. Floukru is a mess because of you. Your mom has started setting traps. More and more of Lexa’s people are injured everyday. All because you ran off. Once Floukru is out of the situation Lexa is going to make a deal with Abby that involves returning you and getting Floukru land. More land means more territory for her people. They can have more camps and people will continue repopulating. That is her goal. Think about it”.

**_I dig down for my wolf trying to seek the truth. I find her sitting in a corner. Her blue eyes stare into me. She won’t reveal anything yet I know what she’s thinking._ **

Shaking my head I stand up. I head straight to the tent.

**_“What’re you doing?”_ **

**I don’t know.**

**_“Well you have to head into battle with a plan”._ **

**Not battle.**

**_My wolf growls and snaps at her teeth at nothing. “I ain’t saving you from your own stupidity!”_ **

**Yes you will. You always do.**

“You’re back sooner than I thought”.

I walk past Lexa and into the bedroom. Once in the room I can’t help but pace as I think things over.

**I can’t go into the forest. As long as I am on this territory Lexa will be able to have control over me, right?**

**_My wolf nods. “Right”._ **

**Floukru has all Trikru so that won’t work.**

**_Another nod._ **

**What’s behind those territories?**

**_“Not sure”._ **

**Shit.**

“Clarke, are you ok?”

I don’t respond.

“Hey, talk to me.”

I laugh shaking my head. “Why should I?”

Lexa doesn’t respond.

“I’ve never asked why you’re so determined to keep me safe.”

“I’m lost”.

“Why are you risking your people by keeping me around?”

“Because you’re my mate?”

“That’s why? Because I’m your mate?”

“I mean… there are other reasons.”

“Why did you help Floukru?”

“Get this fight over.”

“Doesn’t that make Skaikru suspicious of you?”

“I mean yeah but… it was worth it. It got you to talk to me.”

“Were you trying to make Skaikru suspicious? Assume I was here?”

“What? No”.

“Then you didn’t come up with some plan to get Floukru land by letting Skaikru kill them off then turning me in?”

Lexa’s face fills with panic. “How’d you-”

“So it was true! You fucking lied!”. Angry I grab a pillow and throw it at her.

Lexa catches it. “It was an old idea given to me by someone. We discussed it-”

“Asshole!”, I throw another one.

“It was b-”

A pillow hits her in the face.

“C-”

I throw another one. “You suck! I trusted you!”

Moving towards me Lexa grabs both of my hands. “Listen, for one minute”.

“No! Let me go”, I wrestled away from her. 

“Where did you hear that from?”

“Does it matter?”, I growl.

“Clarke, please”.

“Costia”, I whisper.

“And you believed her!”

“How could I fucking not!”, I pick up another pillow. Holding onto it I hit her on the head. “She used to date you!”. I hit her again. Lexa grabs the pillow tossing it to the floor.

“That was so long ago!”

I hit her again.

“Where are you getting all these pillows?”

“I get them as the writer pleases!”. This time I don’t hit Lexa. Tears spring to my eyes as I look at her. “You dated Costia. You fucked Costia! You knotted Costia but left once she hit her heat! I just hit my heat!”

“I would never do that to you!”

“Seems you have a perfect plan! Why not fucking go with it?”

“Cause I love you!”, she shouts.

**_“Love?”_ **

I don’t move. “What?”

“I… I for the longest time didn’t want to say anything. I wasn’t sure what was going to happen to you. I’m used to people leaving me. But… I don’t want you to leave. I want you to stay so I helped Floukru hoping it would prevent Skaikru from getting that land. I was never going to return you. I wouldn’t even use you as bait”. Lexa steps towards me.

More tears spring to my face. They start running down my face.

“Why are you crying?!”, Lexa moves towards me.

“I thought you were going to turn me in!”, I wipe away the tears. I reach out to her wanting a hug. Lexa seems confused so I drop my arms and flop onto the bed.

Lexa, hesitant at first, climbs onto the bed. She lies down by me. “So… everything ok?”

I nod. “Yeah… are you going to keep me around?”

“Only if you’ll keep me around”.

Smiling, I move towards her. “Of course”.

Lexa reaches out. She cups my cheek, her thumb rubs against my bottom lip. “Clarke-”

Cutting her off I lean forward. I press a kiss to her lips. “Mmm”.

Lexa’s arms wrap around me. She pulls me closer. Her teeth scrape my bottom lip.

Before she can bite me I pull away. “We should do that more”.

Lexa pulls me onto her. “So we should”.

“Not now though”. I climb off her. Lying by her I reach over the bed and grab a pillow. 

“Where’d you-”

“Relax, I got this one from the floor”.


	36. Fuck Jogging

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has nothing to do with the story. This is just a fun little bonus story. And this is short.  
> Important note at end.

Oh how Lexa loved jogging. She loved feeling the wind ruffle her fur as she ran by Luna. She admired the light bouncing off the silver pelt of her pack mate.  _ Life is perfect. _

Playfully Lexa dives at Luna’s feet. She nips at the heel before tumbling over and landing in a patch of grass.

Luna wastes no time in turning around to get Lexa’s stomach. The two wolves wrestle in the grass, nipping one another as their problems are pushed to the back of their mind.

_ If only Clarke were here. _

Lexa suddenly gets up. She shakes Luna off.  **_“Clarke”, her wolf voice booms._ ** Luna understands immediately. Giving Luna a quick lick on the cheek Lexa runs back to the camp.

She’s not so sure why she is running. Clarke shouldn’t be awake for at least another hour or two. Her lover wasn’t much of a morning person and Lexa loved that. It meant Lexa could go out jogging in the morning and not feel guilty for leaving Clarke alone. If she was lucky she could sneak some studying in. If that was the case Clarke would wake an hour into studying.

As Lexa ran she realized Clarke would sleep in for at least three more hours considering their late night activities last night.

_ I should do that more often. _ Lexa mentally notes.

Lexa did love jogging. She loved it a lot but she couldn’t help but think  _ fuck jogging. _

Clarke’s day began like usual. She would wake to the gentle songs of the forest birds and with her eyes closed she would listen to the joyful laughters of children running around the camp. 

When she did manage to open her eyes she wasn’t shocked that her naked body was the only thing on the bed. Lexa usually took the mornings to go out for a nice jog or run with Luna. A tradition that Clarke is glad they kept around.

As Clarke sits up she’s surprised to hear someone humming in the living room.

_ Lexa shouldn’t be back. _ She thinks as she moves out of bed. With quiet feet she walks to the tent flap and peeks out. Standing in the kitchen is Clarke’s gorgeous mate. She stands in nothing more than underwear and a sports bra.  _ How did I get so lucky? _

Oh how Clarke could look at her toned muscles as she moved around the kitchen preparing breakfast.  _ She looks so focused. _

“Going to say good morning?”, the brunette asks without looking at her mate. She is well aware Clarke likes to watch Lexa at certain points. That’s one of the few things she took note of since she mated with the Omega.

A few of the other things Clarke did was moan whenever Lexa kissed her, hug her knees when uncertain of something, and always breathe in Lexa’s scent as that seemed to calm Omega.

Simple but sweet things that Lexa would never change.

“Hmm”, Clarke distantly hums, her eyes roaming over Lexa’s body. “I might watch for a while longer”.

Lexa teasingly shakes her hips. “Suit yourself. I’ll just enjoy this wonderous breakfast by myself”.

As soon as she brings up breakfast Clarke moves over to the table. “You know me so well”.

“Of course”. Lexa brings the food over to the table. “What kind of mate would I be?”. She doesn’t let Clarke answer as she moves behind the Omega. Gently tapping her chin she signals for Clarke to look up at her. As soon as she sees those ocean eyes Lexa leans forward and captures those lips with her own.

_ So sweet. _

Lexa could kiss these lips a million different times. Doesn’t matter if Clarke was covered in dirt, sweat or shit. She always managed to taste the same… at least her lips did.

_ What is sweaty sex like? _

It isn’t until Clarke giggles that Lexa realizes she’s standing with her mouth open like an idiot. “Good morning Mrs. Woods”, Clarke says with a cheerful smile.

“‘Morning Mrs. Woods”, she repeats to her lovely mate. She still can’t believe Clarke willingly took her last name. Lexa coughs hoping to make the lingering blush go away.

“I attempted to make your favorite. Luna showed me how yesterday”.

“That’s where you disappeared to”.

A small nod is all Lexa gives to answer Clarke’s question. She watches as Clarke starts eating. She slowly eats, her blue eyes on Lexa. 

“Not hungry?”, Clarke asks with a tilt of her head.

_ Oh I am. _ Lexa shrugs.

Clarke looks at her food then back at Lexa. “You have to be hungry”. Slowly she lifts herself up and leans over the table. She twirls the strawberry in her hand, watching as Lexa’s green eyes catch her every movement. “I mean… I sure am and I haven’t been jogging”. Closer Clarke moves until she can’t lean over the table any more. Their noses almost touch.

“Ah yes”, Lexa coughs. Her eyes dash around the room as she looks anywhere but Clarke. “Luna and I-”

Clarke pushes the strawberry onto Lexa’s lips. The brunette holds it between her teeth. Clarke leans forward, capturing Lexa’s lips on her own. Using her tongue she pushes the strawberry into Lexa’s mouth. “Now”, Clarke climbs up on the table, pushing things aside as she does. “Was it good?”

_ Was it good? Was it good?! _ Lexa nods repeatedly.  _ Man do I love her. _

Clarke nods. She comfortably sits on the table. “Tell me about jogging?”

The Trikru leader opens her mouth only to shut it. She can see Clarke clearly. She forgot her lovely mate was naked. How could she forget? “Fuck jogging”, she says under breath.

A satisfied smile comes onto Clarke’s face. She knew this would work out well. “What was that love?”

Lexa stands up fast enough that her chair flies back. Moving fast she grabs Clarke by the thighs and pulls her forward. Clarke loses balance and falls back onto the table. “Sweet flame”, Lexa’s voice is outlined with something only Clarke could recognize.

_ Lust. _

Clarke speaks in a low voice. “I can’t hear you”.

Leaning forward Lexa scrapes her teeth along the bite mark she left on Clarke years back. She can remember their mating like it was yesterday. “Fuck Jogging.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapter updates starting tomorrow. Also 11 more chapters until part one of this series is done. After I have all of the chapters uploaded on this part I may take a while to start uploading the second book since I haven't really been writing it. I've been giving myself a break from writing Clexa and attempting Korrasami. I'm using Korrasami fic to try a new way of writing. Come Monday I will continue with the second book. I doubt I'll wait until I have all the chapters written out to start updating as I don't even know what it's going to have since I write out ideas then ways that I got to the idea (how the characters got in that situation) then I may add things between. Who knows. So yeah, just a heads up.  
> I'm not going to give much away from the second book but I will say it follows Clarke and Lexa after they find out some shocking news. I'll just put the summary. Though there will be some words not shown as they are spoilers for upcoming chapters. (*/ω＼*)
> 
> After leaving her camp and ending a potential war Clarke is left with a hard decision. Which camp should she go to? She has an even harder question to answer. Which camp is best for *** ***?


	37. Chapter 37

********

(Luna’s POV)

I hear the rustle of the tent as someone steps in. Not taking my eyes off the table I say, “this better be good. It’s my lunch break”.

“It is”.

I turn around. “Lexa?”

“Hey…”

“Finally ready to talk about your problems?”, I wiggle my eyebrows at her. Surprisingly she doesn’t smile or even tease me. A look of true fear and worry enters her eyes. “Lexa?”. I move over to her and bring her into a hug when tears swell up in her eyes. 

_ I haven’t seen her cry in years. _

**_“Lexa doesn’t cry”, my wolf grumbles. She paws at the ground nervously._ **

“Hey, hey”, I cup her face. “What’s wrong?”

“Clarke”.

“Is she ok?”

“She’s fine. Sh-she sitting in the tent”.

“Then why are you crying?”

Lexa wipes her face. “I’m not crying”.

“Come”, I move her over to a seat. “Talk to me”.

“Well… Clarke and I talked. It started out angry but we’re ok now. I think anyways… but what she said”, Lexa looks me in the eye. “I thought I was gonna lose her Luna”.

“You’ve lost people before Lexa”.

“But they weren’t Clarke. I… I don’t know what it is but Clarke she’s different. Better. I want that different in my life and when she… she was slipping away I thought I would lose everything.”

I get what Lexa is saying but I have to confirm something. Moving away from her I make myself a cup of tea. I keep my back to Lexa as I dip the tea bag repeatedly.

“Luna…?”

“You say you would lose everything yet you would have several clans under her hand. You would be a leader. Have females at your disposal… how would you lose everything?”

Lexa answers immediately. “I may have clans and have leadership and females yet I don’t have Clarke. Clarke has become my everything. The day I decided to keep her safe I knew I wanted to keep her around. I don’t care for leadership if I don’t have someone to lead with.”

Humming I face her. “Lexa, you’re in love”.

Lexa doesn’t respond. Her eyes wander all over the room. A few minutes pass before she lets out a loud sigh. “I am”, she looks at me.

“Did you tell Clarke that?”

A blush creeps onto her face. “Maybe”.

_ My friend is in love. This is good, right? _

“Who told Clarke such lies?”

“I didn’t tell-”

“I had a hunch. Who told her?”

“Costia…”

“Of course”.

Lexa nods. Sighing, she stands up and wipes her face. She does this a few times. “Do I look fine?”

“It’s as though you never cried”.

“Really?”

“Yes Lexa. You look fine… will you be ok?”

“Yeah”, she plops back down. Her head in her hands. “I’m going to stay here for a second”.

“What about Clarke?”

“She fell asleep on her many, many pillows”.

“You sound concerned…”

Lexa shakes her head. “Forget it.”

“Alright”. I set the tea in front of her. “I have to talk to someone”.

“Don’t tear her apart”.

Ignoring Lexa I leave the tent. I’m not surprised when I find Costia outside the tent. She has tears streaming down her face and her hands are shaking.

“Is she ok? I saw her storm in here an-”

“Shut it”.

Costia looks confused. “What?”

“Stop the crocodile tears.”

“I don’t know-”

Angry I turn into a wolf. Biting her on the neck I slam her into the ground. Costia looks up at me, her eyes wide. I snap my teeth in front of her face before changing back. “I know what you did, you told the blonde such stupid words hoping you would come out on top”. With my hands on either side of her head I lean forward. “If you ever do something like that again I will make your life a living hell.”

At first Costia looks at me with fear but it slowly changes into mischief. “We’ll see”.

“Wha-”

********

(Raven’s POV)

“Are you sure these are the plants?”, I ask myself knowing my wolf is listening. She snorts back at me giving zero effort to make conversation. “I hope Luna is happy with the amount. This took a while”.

No response.

“I like the smell though”. Some force stops me. I try to walk but it holds me back. “Let me go”, I growl.

**_“I tried”. My wolf retreats into hiding._ **

Stepping into the Trikru Camp I head straight for the healer tent. “L-”, cutting myself off I step behind a tree. I stare at the scene unfolding in front of me. Luna on top of Costia…. kissing her. “No”, I step away. Dropping the plants I turn and run into the forest.

********

(Luna’s POV)

Sputtering I push away from Costia. “Ugh”, I wipe my mouth. “My god, ew”.

Costia laughs as she sits up. “Should’ve seen your face”.

“You asshat”, I reach over, pull my jeans up, and take out a knife. Not wasting another second I stab Costia in the hand.

Her painful scream breaks through the camp attracting some attention.

I move back so the blood pooling from her hand doesn’t touch me. “You’re so fucking gross!”

“You stabbed me!”

“You kissed me!”

“So you fucking stab me?!”

“Yes!”

“Why are you two screaming at eachother?”. Lexa walks out of the tent. She looks at Costia’s hand then to me. “I’m assuming there’s a good reason for this”.

“She stabbed me!”, Costia looks at Lexa. “I came here to make sure you were ok-”

“Don’t you dare start with that bullshit!”, I glare at her. “And I stabbed you because you fucking kissed me!”

“It was a small, meaningless kiss”.

“Still a kiss none of the less and from you. You!”

“I don’t have time for this”, Lexa rubs her head. “Costia, make your way over to Nico’s. He should be in there. Luna, you can’t stab people for kissing you. Turn in your weapons and you can have them in a week from now”.

“Wh-”

“Don’t make me expand that time”.

Luna nods. “Sha Heda”.

Lexa nods back. She starts walking away.

“That’s all? She stabbed me?”. She grinds her teeth as she pulls the knife from her hand.

_ Fucking idiot. _

“You kissed her”, Lexa shrugs.

“You’re just in her favor because of those things I said to that blonde toy sitting in your tent. Little virgin Skaikru mutt”.

“Costia”, Lexa warns.

“What I said to her was the truth and you won’t admit it. You know just as well as I do-”

Lexa growls cutting her off. She faces Costia, daring her to say something else.

“That blonde doesn’t belong in this camp let alone on this territory. You hold onto these false ideas thinking you two can have something. Did you learn nothing from our relationship?”

“Ok, Costia. Since you hate her so much I’ll make a change around here”.

“About time”.

“C’mere”.

“I’m bleeding”.

“You’ll be fine. We both know it takes a lot to kill our people.”

“I’m losing blood”.

“Fine, don’t come here. I’ll just go to Clarke”.

Costia leaps up. She walks over to Lexa. “Yes?”

“I’ve been thinking about our old relationship. Just the way it worked”. She brushes her nails along Costia’s arm then slowly moves towards her face. “It was something, huh?”

Costia nods. 

“It feels like it was just yesterday”.

Confused Costia tilts her head. “Yesterday… what?”

“That I caught you cheating with… oh what was his name?”

“Lexa…”

  
“Ah yes, Mike. My sister’s boyfriend.”

“I told you. He moved onto me”.

“Yet you didn’t stop him”, Lexa steps towards her. “You know what Clarke hasn’t done?”. She takes another step. “Clarke hasn’t had my sister’s lover’s dick inside her. Clarke didn’t say false things to tear you apart”. Lexa’s nails, on Costia’s cheek, sink into her skin. Blood breaks the surface. “Get the fuck out of my camp. Off my territory. If my people find you on this territory they will rip you apart with no mercy.”

“You’re kicking me out of camp?”

“No, I’m kicking you from the Trikru Clan.”

“You can’t banish me!”

Lexa leans forward. “I just did”.


	38. Chapter 38

********

(Lexa’s POV)

I watch Costia walk over to Nico’s hut. For once she isn’t smiling like the sly fox she is. She looks defeated.

I know I shouldn't be thinking this but it is nice to see her look so defeated.

I look at Luna who is still sitting on the ground. She looks disgusted and more defeated than Costia. I think about Costia kissing her. Costia doesn’t just kiss someone. She usually has a reason. Whatever it may be.

“Good luck with that”, I smile at her. Continuing on my way I head over to my tent. As I get closer I can smell Clarke’s heat. “Clarke?”

“She’s in here”.

I walk into the tent. “Raven? What’re you doing in here?”

“I was talking to Clarke”. Raven nudges her friend. “I’m gonna head out”.

Clarke nods. “Good luck with everything”.

I watch as Raven walks out of the tent. Her eyes are red not from her wolf but from crying. Once she’s gone I look at Clarke. “She ok?”

“I can’t say.”

“Are you ok?”

“Burning but ok… for now”.

“Good, that’s good”. I move towards her. Using my knee I nudge her legs apart to stand between them. I stare into her blue eyes hoping to get answers. For what? I’m not sure yet I need answers for something. Sighing, I look away. “C’mon, we both need a bath”.

“Public showers?”, Clarke whispers.

“No, private”.

**********

Once inside the shower room I start undressing. With my clothes off I let my hair out of its braids. I fluff out my hair hating the way it tickles my back.

“You look different with your hair down”.

“Do I now?”

She nods. “Y-yeah… it looks nice”.

I turn to her, a smile on my face when she blushes. “You really like it?”, I move towards her.

Clarke steps back when I step forward. “I mean… it’s different. Brings out facial features”.

She backs into a wall. I stand in front of and bring my hands to rest on each side of her head. “In that case”, I lean forward. “I’ll let it down more often”, I whisper in her ear. Planting a kiss below her ear I step back. “I’m getting in”.

I move over to the tub and get in. It’s hot but bearable.

_ This is nice. _

“Everyone knows we’re in here”.

“I know”.

“They saw us come in together”.

“I am well aware of that”. I keep my back to Clarke so she feels comfortable. I hear her get into the water. “Can I turn around?”

“Yes”.

Turning in the water I look at Clarke. She has her hair up in a messy bun. “I’m sure no one is surprised”.

“Why’s that?”

“We do spend quite a bit of time together. You are… were a Skaikru woman that I let into the heart of my camp. It should be obvious by now”.

“What should be obvious?”

“Don’t play dumb”. I move closer to the window. At a certain point the ground disappears from under my feet. I let myself sink below the water. I can see Clarke shifting in the water. She crosses her legs, her arms covering her chest.

When I come up for air I’m in front of Clarke. “Us, what we are. That should be obvious”.

October 5th, 5057

“We can’t let a Skaikru go”.

“She’ll tell everyone”.

“Behead her”.

“No!”

“I say she stays and works for us”.

“Yeah, make her suffer like her people made us”.

“That had nothing to do with me!”

“Death!”

“Slavery!”

“I do need a maid”.

“I’ll pay ten thousand”.

“Eleven!”

“Enough!”, I snap at everyone. Everyone in the room goes quiet. Slowly they look at me. They want answers and think I have them. I look out the window and at my tent where Clarke is waiting. I could use her presence. “Raven, why should I let you go?”

“Be-”

The double door burst open. Clarke stands in the doorway, her arms crossed. When a guard moves to her she growls standing her ground. Another guard, from outside the room, grabs her wrist. Clarke’s wolf makes a quick appearance. It’s teeth sinking into his arm. She throws him against a wall before shifting back. 

I hold up my hand stopping any more guards. I look at Clarke giving her a questioning look. She should be in bed yet here she is.

Clarke looks back at me. She makes eye contact.

I hear a few guards growl as she looks at me. To them this seems like some challenge to my dominance but to me I know it’s my mate being stubborn.

I watch as Clarke moves towards me. Her eyes trail down my body then back up. “She’s right”.

“Course she is”, someone mumbles.

“Letting Raven go would do everyone good”. When Clarke is close enough she places a quick kiss to my cheek then takes a seat by me. She finally looks away.

I lean over. “Why are you here?”, I whisper.

“I have this bad habit of using my legs to get me places”, she shrugs. “But that’s not the point. Releasing Raven would mean Skaikru won’t go searching for her or increase the number of people per search. Mo- Abby”, she clears her throat. “Probably assumed that my ‘kidnapper’ has also kidnapped Raven therefore panicking Skaikru. To them it seems you guys want something and may kidnap more”.

I consider this before nodding. “Find, Indra take Raven somewhere to be released. Everyone else out”.

Everyone starts leaving. Clarke waits until most of them are gone to stand up. “Please, don’t stay in here too long. See the sun”.

“You go back to the tent and rest”.

“I fee-”

“Go”.

Once Clarke is gone I move over to the window to make sure she gets to the tent. To my surprise she actually goes to the tent. Three guards guard the tent.

**_“That poor girl”._ **

Ignoring my wolf I step out onto the balcony. I look at the sky, enjoying the breeze that moves my hair.

**_“You can’t cope her up in that tent forever”._ **

**Would you shut it?**

**_“I’m just saying”._ **

**I’m not coping her up in that tent.**

**_“Then what are you doing? The girl lives in that tent”._ **

**Kinda the point of a tent.**

**_“No, the point is to use it to sleep, eat and maybe do work. Not spent 24/7 in that tent.”_ **

**She’s going to be fine. I have to do this… I have to protect her.**

**_“All I’m saying is do something with her. Go see the stars or something.”_ **

“The stars”.

_ She likes the stars. She has to. She lived in space for the beginning of her life. _

**_Huffing my wolf shakes her head. “Course she likes stars! Take her to the waterfall. The cliff where the water falls. Have a date, eat some food. Set up a tent. Have a night out. Do something!”_ **

**I will.**

**_“Now!”_ **

**********

********

(Luna’s POV)

“I’ll see you tomorrow!”

I watch as Lexa runs out of the building. 

“Mrs. Jones, are you ok?”, Label runs over to me. Grabbing my hand she helps me up. She brushes my shoulders off and checks for scratches.

“I’m fine Label”. I pick up the stack of papers.

“Where was Heda running off to?”

“Beats me”. I hear Label go on about something. I tune her out as I think about Lexa. She looked so happy. So determined. Maybe she got good news or wanted to share something.

“Hey”.

“Huh? Yeah?”

“Are… are you feeling ok?”

“Yeah, I just fell Label.”

“No, not physically. I know you’re fine in that state but… emotionally.”

I look at Label. I know she has good intentions but I can’t help the red flags going off. I usually talk to Lexa about this type of stuff. That’s only because it goes in one ear and out the other. I’ll never understand how we’re such good friends.

“... but I’m sure Raven will be ok. She seems like a fighter”.

I nod.

“But Raven isn’t what’s bugging you, huh? Something deeper”.

“It’s just…”

_ Can I tell her? _

“I wanted something with her, y’know? It was going so well then she left. She just left. I mean I have a hunch as to why but she didn’t even say anything to me or about why she was leaving. And now I’ll never see her again or know why she left.”

“Oh don’t say that. I know what you two had wasn’t wolf related that means you two truly loved one another. I’m sure things will work out”.

**So there’s gonna be a sudden skip. Just a warning. The next chapter will hold something that isn’t too important, I was gonna include it but didn’t like it. So just know that what the next chapter holds is what happened during the time skip.**

**********

********

(Raven’s POV)

I stare into the Skaikru territory. I’m standing at the edge waiting til my courage is high enough. Behind me some guard packs up her tent and grumbles about duties. How she’s behind schedule because she had to babysit.

I never asked her to tag along.

Taking a deep breath I cross onto Skaikru territory. I feel the woman watching me as I walk away. Her eyes disappear when I know we can no longer see one another.

“Raven?”

I look up at the trees. I have to squint to spot whoever is hiding in the branches. “O?”

“Who else?”, she jumps down. “What’re you doing?”

“I uh… I came back?”

“ _ Came _ back?”

“Well uh”, nervously I start itching the back of my neck. “They let me come back”.

“ _ They _ ?”

“Well, you know.”

“So you were kidnapped”.

“Not exactly”.

“You left willingly?”

“What? No!”

“Then kidnap”.

“It started that way”.

“ _ Started _ that way?”

“Well- I don’t have to explain it to you!”

Octavia eyes me. She walks around me, poking me as she does. “Doesn’t seem like they hurt you. They’re not very good at kidnapping”.

“They don’t do the whole torture thing. At least to some anyways. They seem to make friends”.

“Who are they?”

“My kidnappers”.

“Aha! So you were kidnapped!”

Groaning I step around. “What are you doing out here?”

“I was just wandering”, she shrugs. “Is that so bad?”

“Well no but they let you out?”

“Yeah”.

“They don’t just do that Octavia. What did you do?”

“They sent me out to scout the borders but I didn’t care for that so I started climbing. Just escaping the camp for as long as possible. That such a crime?”

I shrug. “Depends on what you end up doing”.

“Whatever, c’mon. I’m sure Abby will love to see you”.

“I’m sure she will”.

**********

As soon as I step into the Skaikru camp heads turn in my direction. Children stop playing and watch as I head towards the medicine tent. Inside I find Abby already waiting.

“Raven”, she smiles. “I was worried about you”.

_ Sure you were. _

“Oh where, oh where did you go”, she shakes her head. “Were you kidnapped? No, of course not. You’re not that dumb.”

I carefully watch as she moves towards me.

“Though… I do wonder how it was you got caught. It wasn’t inside the camp so you had have left. Yet… there was no trace as to how. It’s like you’ve done it before. So many times”.

**_“She knows”._ **

“And you felt comfortable walking onto their territory? What was your goal? Find Clarke? No. Explore? Maybe. See someone? See her”, she hisses.

**_“Abort! Abort!”_ **

**We can’t abort!**

“Now, we can avoid all this anger and save time. Tell me why you went into their camp. What was your goal? Are you working for them? You must be if you fell in love with some Trikru mutt”. Abby waits.

When I look her in the eyes she knows I’m not going to say anything.

Frustrated she calls the guards in.

They don’t push or even drag me like Trikru but as I’m walking out I spot Octavia. She’s looking at the ground as she nervously kicks at the ground.

“I… I had to.”


	39. What Would Have Happened

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is what happened. It’s some time between Luna and Raven’s POV. Maybe happening during Raven’s POV. So it takes place on the same day.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

I head to the bedroom which is where I spend most of my time. I flop onto the bed. “Gah!”, angry I grab a pillow and roll back and forth.

“Yes, take it out on the pillow”. My wolf rolls her eyes.

Some support would be nice.

“Woohoo! You got this! Rip that fluff out of its meaningless fluffy body!”

Pushing my wolf out of my mind I throw the pillow away from me. It hits the dresser and falls to the floor.

“Hey”.

I look up from the floor. “Lexa?”

She waves. “What’re you doing?”

“Nothing”, I grumble. “Just… sitting in the tent. Y’know, everyday things”. I feel myself slouch. “Everyday things”.

“Right…”, Lexa moves over to me. She takes a seat by me. “I do that sometimes”.

“Pfft”.

“No, really. I used to spend days inside this tent. Luna would check in at the end of the day to see if I was breathing.”

“Why were you in here?”

“I lost motivation to do anything. I had no reason to. I would wake up, do work, go to asleep and repeat the next day. A broken record life.”

“What… what changed?”, I look up at her.

“Well… one day I found this lost, Skaikru blonde. She would look at everything with such amazement then she got stuck in a trap”.

I feel a blush on my face.

“So after helping her down she demanded to come with me. Due to her beauty I had to bring her in and that was the best decision in my life”, Lexa leans forward. “You came along and changed everything. And I like that you did”.

“Course you do”, I push Lexa’s face away from me. Grabbing my hand Lexa places a kiss on each finger. “Why are you here?”

“Oh yeah!”, she jumps up. “Do you want to go on a date with me?”

“C-come again?”

Lexa flinches back. “Um… is that not what your people call it?”

“No, they do but why so sudden?”

She shrugs. “I thought you would want to leave the tent for a while. Just for the day”, she looks away. “Or night”, she whispers.

Night?

“I could sleep under the stars?!”

“I mean yeah”.

“Awesome!”, I grab my shoes and put them on. “But where are we going?”

“You’ll see”.

**********

Coming to a stop I crouch down, my stomach touching the cold grass. I watch as Lexa’s black wolf walks away from me. When she’s far enough I leap up. When I jump at her she steps out of the way. I hit the ground head first.

A heavy paw pushes me onto my side and holds me down. “You have to stop wagging your tail”.

Wrestling out from under her I swipe my paw at her. “I wasn’t wagging”.

Lexa motions behind us. The ground is disturbed in a swiping motion. “Say that again?”

I walk around Lexa and start walking. “Where are we going?”

Lexa catches up. She nips at my ankles and paws. “You’ll see”.

I step away from Lexa. Falling behind her I let a silence fall between us. I usually don’t go out in the forest at night and I can see why. You can barely see anything and there are creatures running everywhere.

As we walk the loud noise of falling water becomes more clear.

“Here?”. I look at Lexa.

She shakes her head. She turns and runs up a path. I watch until the leaves of the trees block her. “Come on!”

I follow Lexa up the waterfall. When I get to the top she’s already shifted. She stands with her arms crossed as she looks at me. Behind her is a forest green tent. “What is this?”

“Our date”.

“When did you have time to set this up?”

“I have people”, she shrugs.

Shifting back I walk over to the tent. I poke it a few times before walking around it. “What’s inside?”

“You’re welcome to go in Clarke”.

“I’m good”, I smile at her. I walk over to the edge of the waterfall. “Pretty high up”.

“That’s how waterfalls work”.

I look at Lexa. She still has her arms crossed as she watches me. I can tell she’s nervous yet she wants something to happen. “Did you have an end goal with this date?”

“Course not”.

Smiling, I walk over to her. I wrap my arms around her neck. “This is nice, thank you”.

“Anything for you”, she smiles. She presses a quick kiss to my lips.

“Now what?”

“Have you made s’mores?”


	40. Thirty Nine and a Half

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did a sudden change in writing. I thought it would be way more easy than um… doing it the usual way. Don’t worry though, the chapters go back to the old way. I’m actually rewriting this scene after I’ve already finished this story. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯   
> This is actually how I’m writing my other fanfic. I am yet to decide if I want to write the 3rd book in this series like this. I might… it gives the chance to say what others are thinking without having to change POV. As of right now the 2nd book is in the usual way but I'm changing it.

With a mind running a thousand thoughts a time Clarke pushes around a burnt marshmallow. She can’t help but feel bad for this little marshmallow as it will never be eaten. A part of her wants to eat it even if it’ll taste like a campfire. She’s come to the conclusion that that part is her inner wolf as it wants to eat everything that could be considered food.

_ How come I wasn’t told about this? _ The green eyed leader would think as she bit into her fifth s’more that night. She’s thankful Luna brought it up a while back. “Mmm!”, she happily wiggles her feet. “So good!”, Lexa exclaims.

A soft giggle comes from across the campfire. The sound makes Lexa feel warm. Upon hearing the giggle she knows she would do anything to hear it again.

Clarke can feel the same warmth as she thinks “I can’t believe I get to date her”.

“We”, her wolf responds in a slightly annoyed voice. She hates being forgotten.

Ignoring her wolf the blonde stands up and sits on the grass by her mate. “I’m glad you like it”. She watches as the slight breeze blows away the black marshmallow. It falls into the nearby stream and floats away.

Pearly whites catch her attention when her mate smiles at her.

_ Man, do I love that smile. _

Finishing her s’more Lexa leans forward to steal a kiss from her lover. “Tastes like chocolate”, she whispers against Clarke’s lips. She smiles when the girl nervously laughs. Stealing one last kiss she leans away from the blonde. She intends to stare into those blue eyes for the rest of her life. That dream is cut short as Clarke leans in to kiss her mate.

The kisses start out slow. As seconds pass the kisses turn heated. Clarke leans away when she feels Lexa's tongue swipe out to lick her bottom lip. Lexa fears she's crossed the line.

"She hasn't said no", her wolf whispers.

“Lie back”.

“Huh- what?”

“Trust me”.

Clarke stares into the deep forest her mate holds in her eyes. She knows to trust her but she doesn’t know where this will lead. Making up her mind she lies down, a shiver running through her as the grass tickles her neck.

“Good girl”, Lexa is more than happy to praise her golden beauty. She loves the way the blonde’s eyes flash with confidence when she gets a compliment. Moving closer she sits on Clarke’s legs.  _ Is this ok? _ , she asks herself as she looks down at her mate.

**_“She hasn’t said stop”,_ ** Lexa’s wolf encourages her to go on.  **_“Take what you want”._ **

Despite the doubt she felt Lexa’s mind was made up. She was going to take what she wanted and what she wanted was Clarke. 

With a nod she leans forward, her lips hovering over Clarke’s.

“Lexa”, the blonde whimpers. She’s not sure what she’s asking of Lexa but she wants something.

She can feel the need coming from Clarke. She wants to give everything to her but she likes teasing way too much. “Shh”. Lexa brushes her thumb along the blonde’s lips. She applies some pressure as she waits. Getting the hint the blonde opens her mouth letting Lexa’s thumb in. She gently sucks on it as she gazes up at Lexa. “Good”.

Using her free hand Lexa rips off Clarke’s blouse. She can see goosebumps rise on her exposed skin as the cold touches her chest.

“I did like the blouse”, Lexa voices. “Bummer”. It only takes a second for her to find the familiar ocean eyes. They’re full of wanting. The looks the blonde gives her causes heat to radiate from between her legs.

_ This isn’t about you,  _ she has to remind herself.

Placing one kiss on Clarke’s cheek she moves down her body, leaving kisses as she does. Lexa peppers kisses over her chest making sure to avoid her breasts.

_ Asshole. _ With a frustrated growl Clarke bites down on the brunette’s thumb. “Don’t tease”, she whimpers around her thumb.

Lexa stares into her eyes for what seems years before pulling her thumb from the blonde’s mouth. “That wasn’t very nice”. Slowly she runs a finger down Clarke’s body, following the same trail her kisses went. Lightly she twirls a finger over Clarke’s bra where a nipple is.

Getting even more frustrated Clarke bucks her hips getting Lexa’s attention. She smiles down at her Clarke.

“What do you want Clarke?”

A blush creeps onto Clarke’s face, she doesn’t dare answer the question. With a huff she looks to the side refusing to look at Lexa.

Enjoying the moment Lexa leans forward. “I can’t help if I don’t know what you want”, she whispers into the blonde’s ear. When she doesn’t respond she blows cold air below her ear. “Clarke”, she sings.

Hooking a finger in Clarke’s bra she whispers “off?”

The blonde nods.

“As you wish”. Lexa can’t thank the person who made the clip on the front enough. Both girls release a happy sigh as soon as the barrier the bra provided is gone.

Lexa moves her nail around the breast. “Now what?”

Clarke mumbles something.

“What was that?”

“Kiss me”, she whispers. Her ears turn a bright red of crimson.

Teasing the girl enough Lexa kisses her ear. She bites and sucks her way down Clarke’s neck and to her breasts. Once her mouth makes contact with Clarke’s nipple, Clarke whimpers.

_ Sensitive. _ Lexa notes that for the future. She tests out Clarke’s sensitivity on her breasts. Scraping her teeth along the nipple Lexa sits up happy with her work.  _ Mine. _

“No”, Clarke misses the feeling of Lexa’s mouth.

Lexa smiles. “I’m not done with you”. Moving off the blonde Lexa hooks her fingers into the blonde’s pants. She searches for the blue orbs as she asks for permission.

_ Yes. _ Clarke nods to Lexa, she can’t wait any longer.

“You’ll be cold at first”. Not wasting another second she pulls both the pants and underwear off in a swift motion. The heat Lexa was feeling earlier gets stronger. A perfect V marks where she wants to be. Where the blonde needs her to be. At a loss of words she hums a low “hmm”.

Clarke gazes up at Lexa.  _ What is she thinking? _ Suddenly self conscious she presses her thighs together. “Hmm?”

Wanting to prevent any feelings of uncertainty Lexa says “I’m just happy”. She runs her hand down Clarke’s stomach and to her legs. Giving her thighs two taps she asks for her to open. Clarke hesitates at first but opens revealing everything she has to give.

With a happy hum Lexa settles between the blonde’s legs. Pressing kisses up one thigh she stops a few inches from Clarke’s center. Clarke whimpers, wanting her mouth on her.

“Please”, the blonde whimpers.  _ If I have to whine then so be it. _

Lexa mumbles something that she doesn’t even know what she said. Placing kisses up the other thigh Lexa comes to eye level with Clarke’s wet center. Seeking out ocean eyes she makes sure Clarke is ok.

“Dammit Lexa!”, Clarke bucks her hip.

Torturously Lexa runs her tongue between two wet folds. The simple contact has Clarke whimpering, her hands grabbing onto the grass.

Lexa repeats this motion a few times, enough to get Clarke writhing under her. Before she does anything else she places a hand on Clarke’s stomach to hold her down. She looks up at Clarke watching her reaction as she presses her tongue against her entrance.

Knowing what Clarke wants Lexa latches onto the nub, gently sucking as her fingers play at Clarke’s entrance. Two hands find their way into Lexa’s hair, their grip tightening as Clarke gets close.

“Le… xa”, she pants. The fire between legs burns brighter, Lexa being the fuel. She wishes Lexa would penetrate her but she knows she won’t. Opening her eyes Clarke looks down at Lexa, searching for green eyes. When she finds them her fire burns too bright. Unable to control it she lets it go out of control, lets it run through her veins.

_ There you go. _ Lexa licks slow circles around Clarke’s clit helping her ride out her orgasm for as long as it will last. When she hears the blonde whimpers she crawls up Clarke’s body. She’s breathing hard as she floats down to earth. “Breathe”, Lexa whispers. “You ok?” As a response Clarke lets out a noise between a moan and hum.

“My god”, Clarke finally opens her eyes allowing Lexa to see those blue orbs. 

“There’s my girl”, she whispers and places a swift kiss on her lips. As Lexa thinks the last few moments over she runs a wet finger over Clarke’s lips. Clarke takes the finger into her mouth, licking it clean. Lexa swears she could’ve come at that sight alone.

The two sit in silence for a few seconds before Lexa can’t help but ask “good?”

Clarke laughs, shaking her head. “Great”.

“Good… good”. Although Lexa could lie on this grass forever she knows Clarke must be cold. She climbs off the blonde and retrieves her clothes. As Clarke watches she knows her shirt is trash at this point. With one look at Clarke Lexa knows what she is thinking. “You can wear my shirt when we return”.

When Clarke sits up to put on her clothes she comes to a small realization.  _ Lexa never took anything _ , she thinks as she looks at the Trikru leader.  _ I’m still a virgin. _

Within Clarke her wolf pouts in the corner. It comes off as heartbroken. Next to it a black wolf nudges its head. Licking its face it knows something is off.

“Hey”. Lexa questions if she did something wrong. “You ok?”

“I uh… I don’t have much or anything to give you”.

“You just gave me a wonderful night and taught me how to make s’mores”.

Clarke nods.  _ Didn’t know someone could like s’more that much. _ “Yeah. I did. I’m surprised you never had them before… but I want to give you something else”.

“Well… do you know how to cook?”. Lexa plops down by her lover. Despite her being naked her only thought is on talking to the blonde. “I’ve always wanted to learn how to co-”

“I want to give you my virginity”.

“Ook- what?”. Blinking at the blonde Lexa feels like she was told Clarke was pregnant or something. She’s never had someone straight up say “take my virginity”.

With the dumb look Lexa is giving her Clarke feels like such an idiot.  _ What did I just say? _ “It’s just… nevermind”, the blonde reaches for her clothes.

Lexa pulls them away without thinking. As she goes over the sex they just had Lexa realizes she knew Clarke wanted more. Every Omega wants more but Clarke wanted Lexa.  _ How can I be so blind? _ “You know”, she sets the clothes down and away from Clarke. “I’ve taken plenty of people’s virginity. Just simple things. Though to be fair I didn’t care what happened to it. I wanted sex, they would give me sex”.

“Lexa”. The blonde fails to see why Lexa is talking about her previous flings. Wanting this to be over she reaches for her clothes but the brunette pushes them behind her back.

Grabbing Clarke’s wrist Lexa pulls her close, their bodies now touching. Not waiting for Clarke to say anything Lexa kisses Clarke rather forcefully.

“Mph”, the blonde grabs onto Lexa’s shirt.  _ What is happening? _

Pressing her knee between Clarke’s legs she feels the wetness soak her pants.  _ Fuck _ , Lexa presses her tongue against Clarke’s mouth asking for entrance. Clarke grants it, moaning as Lexa’s tongue explores every inch of her mouth.

Against her wishes Lexa leans back, breaking the kiss. Her eyes sweep over Clarke’s body.  _ Mine. _ Leaning forward she kisses Clarke’s neck. She bites and sucks purposely leaving marks in places everyone will be able to see. Moving down her neck she bites her shoulder making Clarke yelp.

“Top or bottom”, Lexa’s mouth moves against Clarke’s chest.

“Top or… bottom?”, a hazy minded Clarke asks.

“Y’know”, Lexa looks up at her. “Top or bottom, Clarke?”

Clarke blankly stares up at Lexa, she isn’t sure where she wants to be. She just wants Lexa in her.

“Top it is”, Lexa quickly strips down to nothing. She moves away from Clarke, leaving both of them exposed. Lexa has no care for being out in the open. 

Clarke finally gets a full view of Lexa. She reaches out, lightly touching her chest. Running her hand down between her breasts, over her stomach, she comes to a stop right above the hard member. “Holy shit”, Clarke doesn’t mean to say it out loud. “I’m sorry- I-”   
“I know”, Lexa closes the distance between the two of them. Bringing Clarke close she lies down so Clarke is above her.

Clarke knows what it is next. Lexa already has her hovering over her hard member.  _ That thing _ , Clarke gazes down at it.  _ Is supposed to go in me? _ With one glance at Lexa she knows she wants it as much as Clarke does.  _ Here goes nothing. _

Sinking down she feels the tip at her entrance. That little contact makes her want more. Want it all. Clarke pushes the tip in, a pain beginning to form. Biting her bottom lip she looks at Lexa who looks up at her with all the love in the world. She reaches out, her hand coming to splay out on Clarke’s stomach.

Pushing down more Clarke keeps going until she has it all in. Releasing her lip she lets out a breath she wasn’t aware she was holding. She can’t describe what she’s feeling.

Lexa’s member twitches inside. Her hips buck sending a wave of pleasure through both of them.

Clarke starts a slow motion of moving up and down as she adjusts to the feeling. She watches Lexa’s face closely. Once she feels good about all this she speeds up.

Lexa curses something in her language. She runs her hand down Clarke’s back and cups her ass.

Smiling Clarke leans forward and presses several kisses to Lexa’s neck.

In a swift motion Lexa flips them over so she’s on top. “What’re you doing to me?”, she whispers in the blonde’s ear. Pressing a kiss to her shoulder she pulls out. Clarke whimpers at the loss. Bringing their lips together Lexa slams into Clarke, her mouth silencing her scream. She can feel Clarke’s nails digging into her back.

As Clarke feels her mind slipping she wraps her legs around Lexa bringing her closer.

Lexa can feel Clarke getting close so she brings her hand between Clarke’s legs. Rubbing circles around the girl’s clit is enough to send her over the edge. Her cries fill Lexa’s ears. The tightening of her walls sends Lexa over the edge. Her mind feels foggy as she releases everything she has to give.

Lexa opens her mouth, her teeth sinking into Clarke’s neck. When she bites down she feels a connection forming between her and Clarke. Clarke shakes under Lexa as another orgasm racks her body. This time Clarke bites Lexa on the neck.

**********

With love in her eyes Lexa looks down at her now mate. She’s panting as she tries to catch her breath. Once she opens her eyes she leans forward to quickly kiss Lexa.

“That”, she pants. “Was amazing”.

Lexa chuckles at her response. “Amazing, yes but this grass is killing me”. She starts to pull out only for Clarke to whimper “it hurts”.

Lexa stops moving. “Alright… this is going to hurt but…”, the brunette wraps her arms around her mate. She winces when Clarke yelps as she moves to a sitting position, the blonde on her lap. “Ok?”

Clarke doesn’t respond. Her head lazily lies on Lexa’s shoulder. A few minutes pass before Clarke answers her mate. “We’re never having sex on the grass again”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also needed everyone to know the whole Clarke saying “it hurts” part but it’s easier to write it out then just put it in some note after skipping it.   
> Also no update tomorrow but there will be another one today.


	41. Chapter 41

*This would be same day, after sex*

(Lexa’s POV)

“And over there”, Clarke points up at the sky. Looking where her finger is pointing I look at a star. “We have the constellation called Aquarius”.

“A group of stars?”

“No, each constellation is supposed to look like something. This looks like a man with a bucket”.

“I’m just seeing stars”.

“You have to tilt your head”. Clarke tilts her head to the right.

I shake my head. “I’m not tilting my head”.

“Only way to see it”, she shrugs.

I look at Clarke wanting to know if she’s serious. When she smiles at me I know she is. “Only for you”. Sighing I tilt my head to the right. “You see it?”

“Yeah, you?”

“Just stars”.

“Maybe the left?”, she tilts her head to the left.

I do the same. “More stars”.

“Maybe your imagination is lacking?”

I give Clarke a look.

Laughing she rolls onto her back. She stretches her arms above her head.

“I’m not lying on my back”.

Smiling, she points at the stars. “Up there is Pegasus.”.

“Pega- what?”

“Mystical creature but that’s its constellation”.

I tilt my head to see the constellation.

I’m not seeing anything.

Although Clarke is pretending not to notice I can see the smile on her face.

“What about that star?”.

**********

As Clarke goes on about the stars I come to realize I could hear her talk all day. Especially when it's about the stars. Her eyes reflect the same shine the stars hold.

With a sigh I rest my head on my arms.

Clarke glances at me. “And he…”, she trails off. Laughing she shakes her head. “I’m droning on and on, sorry”.

“Dro… ning?”

Clarke smiles. “You don’t know big english words huh?”

“I was taught the basics. English a thing parents choose to teach their kids. Most don’t though”. I look away from her to hide a blush. “What’s droning?”

“Endless talking”.

I nod. “So? What’s wrong with droning?”

“I must be boring you. Post sex and we’re talking about constellations”.

“We could-”

“Lexa”, she gives me a look.

“Ok, no sex. So talk more. Tell me more?”

“About?”

“Well”, I point at the sky. “If I am correct that’s Chungi”.

“Huh?”

“And over there”, I point at another star. “Sausage? Definitely sausage”.

Clarke smiles at me. “And that one?”, she points at a star.

“Hmm… Rose.”

“Rose?”

I nod. “Rose”.

Laughing she nudges me with her shoulder. Since she can’t leave the tent she has to move around to get a better view. Pointing at the stars I did, she names their correct names. “But uh I like your names better”. Clarke nervously smiles, a blush settling on her cheeks.

“You weren’t kidding about this being your first relationship, huh?”

“It shows?”

“Only a little”, I shrug. “But it’s cute”. I lean over and kiss her on the cheek. “And I wouldn’t change it for the world”.

Clarke opens her mouth only to close then open it then close it. 

“Here”, I motion to the stars. “Tell me about space.”

“I just did.”

“No, living in space.”

I don’t know if I said it before, I couldn’t find it but I’m not so sure how long Clarke was in space. At least for this story. So… sorry if I changed the date or year she went down or whatever.

“Well, I’ve spent an equal amount of time down here and in space”.

“Really? I assumed you lived in space most of your life”.

“Well when your mom is part of the leaders and has to go down yet doesn’t trust you alone with your father, you kinda have to go with her”, Clarke eyes me. “I was nine when I left. It was nice to be out of space. I’m sure everyone else was relieved too.”

“Why’s that?”

“I wasn’t exactly a nice child. I mean I was but I always caused destruction somehow. So when I left everyone in space knew I wouldn’t cause any destruction. And it was like that on Earth for a while since I would sit in my mom’s tent doing nothing. Just waiting for something to happen. Then the walls were built and I could leave the tent. I got to explore the camp and uh… I accidentally destroyed things”, she shrugs. “Anyways, space was nice. I met Raven there… she was hacking into something to get herself some more food every week.”

Hacking?

“Beats me”.

“Then I met Octavia… the girl in the floor. Bellamy, her older brother, showed us her. He wanted his little sister to have friends”.

“Did you say Bellamy?”

Clarke nods.

The man who is hunting her. Growling I look away from Clarke. “Then what happened?”, I mumble.

“We grew to be friends”. I can hear Clarke being cautious. “We would sneak Octavia out of the room every now and then. Did things here and there. Space was nice. Easy… simple”. She pauses. When I look at her, her eyes are distant. “I always felt I didn’t have something. Like I was lacking something. Even today I don’t know what I thought I needed as I don’t feel it anymore. Could’ve been the fact that my mate was down on Earth doing what it was she was doing.”

“Nine years ago? Hmm, I don’t really know. I was 16 so probably fucking someone. No! I think that was the year when I had a group of people murder a whole camp. Those fuckers! The-”

Clarke is looking at me, her eyebrows raised.

I curse myself for even beginning that story. I don’t want to expose Clarke to this type of stuff. “It’s a long story”.

She blinks at me.

“Clarke?”

“You were 16 nine years ago?!”

“Yes.”

“You’re telling me that if we met nine years ago I would’ve been mates with a 16 year old?! A nine year old would’ve mated a 16 year old!”

“That’s how math works”, is what I want to say but I keep silent.

“So you’re 26?”

“Do you really want me to answer that?”

She shrugs.

“I’m 25 and my date of birth has already passed”.

Instead of a proper response, Clarke yawns. “Sorry”.

“It’s fine. You’re tired, get some sleep”.

“And you?”

“I’ll be in in a minute”. I watch as Clarke crawls further into the tent. She looks between my side of the tent and her side. Without wasting another second she plops down on my side of the tent.

When I’m sure she’s asleep I put on my clothes and step out of the tent. I don’t go too far from the tent in fear Clarke would wake up and get scared.

“Why can’t you be normal and sleep?”, my wolf glares at me. She sniffs around the place as she searches for the familiar presence of the golden wolf. I’m surprised Clarke’s wolf isn’t around.

Pushing her out of my mind I look up at the night sky. I try to remember the names of the stars or constel- something.

This distraction doesn’t work for long. I have to think about Clarke or the way she reacted to our age gap. Among my people, the age gap isn’t really a problem as long as the mates are legal. You could find out your mate is 20 years older than you and no one would bat an eye. It’s actually surprising that my mate is seven years younger than me.

Sure, Clarke has repeatedly said she was 18. I never really cared for her age though, I was shocked when I found out but that was for other reasons.

Real problem is Clarke may not want pups with someone who is seven years older. It isn’t uncommon for an Omega to refuse to have pups because of age gaps or something with the Alpha.

“Only time can tell”.

October 7th, 5057

********

(Clarke’s POV)

Snuggling closer to Lexa I let out a happy sigh.

This is perfect.

I feel like I’m floating on a cloud with no shits to give. If death came knocking on my door right now, I would be fine with it.

I feel myself sinking further into my cloud when a soothing and relaxing voice breaks the silence. 

“You’re making a noise”.

I position myself so I can look at Lexa. “I wasn’t aware”.

Lexa’s hand stops moving through my hair. As soon as the movement stops a feeling of anger settles into the pit of my stomach.

Now I’m sitting on a thundercloud.

“Everything ok?”, Lexa smiles at me.

Reaching out I grab her hand and put it back on my hair. “There”.

“Someone needs human contact”.

“Says you”.

Lexa’s hand starts moving through my hair again. “Meaning?”

“Who was the one all touchy and feely an hour ago?”

“That was sex Clarke”.

I shrug. 

Leaning over she kisses my forehead. “You’re strange Clarke.”

I can’t be that strange.

“So, what do you want to do today?”

“Lie here. Forever”.

Lexa’s silent for a few seconds. I can feel her shaking as she wiggles her foot. “I’m not one for sitting still but if you really want that then I’m sure I can manage”.

“I can’t sit still either”. Although I hate to do it, I sit up. “Shouldn’t we get back to camp?”

“There’s no rush. I had no plans for today”. Lexa sits up. “Skaikru is doing their thing. No real threat right now”.

I crawl over to my side of the tent and start putting my clothes on. “Hmm”. As I’m dressing I keep my back to Lexa to hide my blushing face. Even though I’m not looking I know she is. “We should go into the forest”.

No response.

I turn and face Lexa. I keep waiting for her to say something but she doesn’t. She awkwardly picks at a blanket, her eyes on the ground.

“Lexa?”

“Hmm?”

“Why won’t you say anything?”

“Clarke, you know I don’t like the idea of going into the forest… not with you anyways”.

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“I don’t mean it rudely”, she looks at me. “It’s just you’re wanted by a whole clan and uh.. Forest wandering doesn’t exactly help”

“I’ll be fine. What if we went away from Skaikru?”

Lexa sighs and rolls her neck. “Fine but you stay in sigh at all times”.

I nod. “Promise”.

********

(Luna’s POV)

Beside me Label stands up. She sets a few things down before saying, “I’ll be heading out now”.

“See you tomorrow”.

Once Label is gone I close up the healing tent. I have to put things away that guests left out. There’s a lot less than usual which is strange. Usually there’s a lot of people coming in and out seeking help.

What a strange day.

“Luna”.

“We’re closed”.

“This is about Lexa”.

I put the last books on the shelf before looking at the person. “Indra, what a surprise”.

“Who were you expecting?”, she narrows her eyes.

“Relax, I’m used to Costia walking in but she’s… gone”.

Indra nods. “Right”.

“Anyways, what did Lexa do now? I’m not scrubbing someone’s blood off the floor. Not again”.

“Heda hasn’t done anything. Heda isn’t at camp right now”.

“Really?”

She nods again. “I was hoping you would know where she is”.

“Shouldn’t you know?”, I grab my bag. “You are her guard”.

“I do know where she was but she is no longer there. I waited a few hours and no sign of her”.

“Relax. It’s only 2pm, I’m sure she’s off in the forest with the blonde”.

“I need her now”, Indra watches me.

I open the tent entrance to step out. “Then go find her if it’s that big of a deal”, I step out.

Why is that half of the people who come to talk to me, always talk to Lexa? Lexa this, Lexa that. Have you seen Lexa? Is Lexa ok? Will you tell Lexa this? I need to talk to Lexa.

Like I’m not attached to her hip. We’re different people.

“Jealous?”

Frustrated.

October 5th, 5057

(Raven’s POV)

“Where do you want her?”

Abby’s eyes go from the guard then to me. “Put her in a guest room. Make sure the bed sheets have been cleaned recently. And get her a new set of clothes”.

“Is she not a prisoner?”

“Not exactly”.

The guard is obviously confused but he doesn’t ask anymore questions. “C’mon”, he growls.

As I’m walking off I look at Octavia. I’m in shock that she would say anything. That she would rat me out. I can’t help but wonder if she told them about her sneaking out. How she helped Bellamy.

“I doubt it”.

“C’mon, get in”, the guard nudges me into a room. “A maid will bring a new set of clothes. Don’t even think about escaping”. He closes the door behind him.

I wait a minute before walking over to the window. When I look out I see the all too familiar settings. People doing everyday things. They go on with their lives that don’t extend past those damned walls. All oblivious to the things they are being denied. Some would say they have the best life in here but I beg to differ. We take all this territory only to stay in one spot.

Are these the thoughts Clarke would think with every passing day? Did she go crazy just by thinking about it?

I know I’m going crazy… and it’s only been a minute.

“Mrs. Reyes”.

I turn around. “Margaret.”

“So nice to see you again. Everyone was so worried you were eaten alive by those monsters out there”.

“And you?”. I watch as she takes the blankets off and replaces them with new ones.

She stops in the middle of putting the blanket on. “I”, she smooths the blanket down then her attention turns to a pillow. “I think people will repeat what they heard whether it is true or false. They will say what they are taught.”

When I don’t respond she goes on.

“A trapped bird would describe the world as its cage as that is all it has ever seen. All it has known. A free bird would describe the world as it is, bigger than a cage and more alive for it knows the truth. But it is not the trapped birds fault for the false things it has said. For its world doesn’t go beyond the cage… instead the free bird's anger should be directed towards the ones who have its fellow bird locked up”. She smiles at me. Margaret places clothes on the bed. On her way out she stops by the doorway. “I know you hate the people here. You think of them as dumb or… oblivious. Blinded for better words. You think that way because they wish to stay inside the wall. But do think of it this way. Birds born inside a cage think flying is an illness”.


	42. Chapter 42

Beside me Lexa runs her hands through her hair. “Your people suck”, she glances at me. “I mean that in the nicest way”.

“They do”, I nod. “What did they do?”

“Clarke-”

“Lexa, you promised to tell me these things. I can’t attempt to stay safe if I don’t know what to stay safe from.”

She nods. “A group of them were spotted on our territory earlier today. They didn’t try to hide. They called out your name and some of them were setting up traps.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means they know you’re here.”

I look at Luna. Her eyes are guarded as she looks at Lexa. I look back at Lexa. “You’re not telling me something”.

Lexa sighs. “They left a warning.”

“A warning?”

“They left five bodies… of our people”.

_ Those who went missing. _

October 8th, 5057

********

(Raven’s POV)

“We shouldn’t attack”, Octavia looks at Abby. “We have to make them think we don’t know she is there but at the same time we’re provoking them.”

Abby nods. “And what do you suggest?”

“Well they have people out in the forest 24/7, they won’t notice a few missing”.

“We’re going to kidnap them?!”

“We’re doing what they did to us”.

“C-”, I cut myself off. I shouldn’t tell them Clarke is there willingly. It’ll fuel Abby’s anger. “Right”, I nod. “Of course”.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

Growling I open my eyes. “What is that noise?”, I grumble.

I don’t get a response.

I look around. Panic shoots through me when I don’t see Lexa. I look around the dark room hoping she’s in the bathroom or in the living room. “Lexa?”

No response.

I stumble out of bed and walk into the living room. She’s nowhere in sight. I go to the tent entrance and peak out. Just as I’m about to step out, Lexa appears out of nowhere.

“What are you doing?”

“I-”

“Get inside”, she pushes me in. Looking around she steps in. “God, what were you thinking? Yo-”

I hug her. “I thought you left”, I whisper.

“What?”

“I… I woke up and you were gone. I thought you left… I thought… I thought”, holding back a sob I push my face into her chest. “Don’t leave me”.

Lexa’s arms wrap around me. “Never”.

“Where did you go?”, I look up at her. “Where did you disappear to?”

“Skaikru they took some people. Luna was searching for one of them, Label, but of course we didn’t find her. I had to calm her down”.

_ Label. Why Label? _

October 10th, 5057

I look at Luna. I can see why her eyes are guarded. She’s hiding the fear, anger and broken pieces behind them. “I- I’m so sorry”, I shake my head. I feel like I’m going to throw up. I feel like everything is spinning.

_ This is my fault. _

“I… I have to go”. I stand up.

“Clarke”, Lexa pulls me to her. She wraps me in her arms.

Once in her arms a feeling of warmth surrounds me. Inside this warmth I let everything go. The tears start going down my face. “This is my fault”.

“No, it’s not. I’ll figure this out. I promise”.

“I shouldn’t have left”, I whisper. “This is because I left!”

“You did the right thing”, Luna stands up. “Although you may not see it this camp needed you as much as you needed us. Believe it or not you are one of us and we’ll protect you. As long as you will let us.”

I look at her. “I’m sorry about Label”.

Luna shrugs. “It is what it is.”

Lexa taps my chin getting me to look at her. “In order for us to protect you, you must listen to us. Let us help you”.

“What’re you going to do?”

“Keep you safe”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot has happened in the span of a month. I will include a timeline in the next chapter (or at the end of this story)


	43. Chapter 43

Keep me safe is what Lexa did or attempted to do. How did she do this? Making me stay inside the tent with each passing day. At first I refused to do this.

October 11th, 5057

“And I want someone on this tent 24/7. Especially on the side closest to the forest”.

“Sha Heda”, each guard responds at the same time.

“That is all”.

They nod and step outside of the tent.

“Whose tent are they guarding?”. Turning around on the couch I look at Lexa.

“This one”.

“Why? No one will be in here”.

“You will be”.

“What?”, I stand up. “No, I’m not staying in this tent, not again”.

“Clarke-”

“No Lexa. I can’t stay in here hiding”.

Sighing Lexa shakes her head. She walks around me and over to the tent entrance. “I don’t have time to talk about this”.

“But me hiding shows my mo-”

“Clarke. I don’t have time for this”.

I turn away from her and start picking at a string on a blanket. “Course you don’t”, I mumble. As soon as I say it I bite my tongue. “Sor-”

“What does that mean?”

“Nothing”, I shake my head. “I didn’t mean to say it… it’s nothing.”

“No, what did you mean.”

I dig my foot into the ground. “It’s just… you’re a leader Lexa. I may be your mate and all that but the safety of your people will always come first. It’s not surprising if you don’t have time to talk to me”.

“C-”

“I get it”, I look at her. “Really, I guess… it’s lonely but I get it.”

“That’s not- I wasn’t trying- I... Clarke”.

“It’s fine, it’s fine”. I walk over to her and lightly shove her towards the exit. “Go. I’ll stay here”.

Lexa sighs. “Listen I know you hate being left in here all day. I wish it wasn’t like this but this is the only thing I can think of to keep you safe.”

“I know and thank you but you are visiting right?”

She smiles. “Of course”.

“Daily”.

“Yes”.

“We should eat lunch together.”

“And what is it you are craving?”

“Cake”.

“For lunch?”

I give her a look. “I’m craving cake”.

She flicks the tip of my nose. “Then cake it is”.

She never showed. I waited for her to arrive with cake. She didn’t come. I had a few slices of bread instead. I waited for her to come to bed but she didn’t. I tried to ask guards but they wouldn’t talk to me. At some point I gave up and went to sleep thinking I would wake up to forest green eyes.

  
  
  
  
  


I didn’t.

On the 12th I got a visit from Luna.

October 12th, 5057

To keep my mind busy I clean the tent repeatedly. Once I found nothing else to clean I started removing the books then putting them back in some order. First I sorted by color. Rainbow of course. It looked nice.

Then I sorted by color in alphabetical order. You could have red and purple but purple would be before red because P is before R. Simple things. It wasn’t as appealing as the rainbow but it was something.

Next I did by name. It wasn’t satisfying at all. I hated that the most. I started organizing based on the first word in the book but Luna walked in.

“Someone’s bored”, she mumbles. She flops onto the couch. “Mind if I sleep?”

“I do like conversations but if you wish to sleep I won’t complain”. I open a book with gold designs. The first word on Chapter One, ‘Skrish…’ “Hey Luna?”

“You said you wouldn’t complain”. Her voice sounds tired and defeated.

“What’s skrish mean?”

“Shit”.

“What? Something wrong?”

“It means shit”.

I nod. Luna doesn’t say anything for the next hour. As she’s sleeping I put books on and remove them. When I can’t think of any more organization ideas, I start trying to place colors to make a picture. There’s not enough books.

I turn around to talk to Luna. I’m shocked to see she’s already awake. She looks up at the ceiling, her eyes as distant as the stars. I wonder what she’s thinking about. I know she won’t tell me these things. Why would she?

_ I bet she’s thinking of Label. _

**_“What’s it matter to us?”_ **

“Why did you come in here?”

Luna flops her head to the side as she looks at me. “Your mate”, she begins. “She has a lot of loud thoughts. I came here for silence”.

I nod. “Sounds like Lexa”.

Luna eyes me. “You seem calm for someone who has to be alone”.

I shrug.

“Don’t miss Lexa?”

“Of course I miss Lexa. She’s the highlight of my day… usually she is. But she’s currently busy and it’s better to not get in her way. For now I am fine cleaning, sorting… cleaning”.

“You don’t think out loud right? I came here to avoid that”, she turns away. “I won’t get that here right?”

I nod again. “I got nothing to talk about”.

On the 13th Luna came again. This time she was willing to talk. She didn’t talk much but I could tell saying something was helping. She wasn’t one for sitting down and saying her problems so we played chess. A lot of chess. I came to realize Lexa left out a lot of things about chess. Things that would’ve come in handy. I figured I could handle time in the tent if I had company.

Then came the 14th.

Luna didn’t show.

October 14th, 5057

“Hey”, I tap the tent exit.

No response.

“Indra, I know you’re out there”.

No response.

“If you don’t say anything I will tell you my life story”.

No response.

“Ok, well it all started on prom night, a random prom night. It was sudden. My people didn’t really do those on the Ark. Anyways, my mom, Abby, decided she would go even though she wasn’t one for social events. About that. The reason why she didn’t do social events was afte-”

“Ok, stop. What do you want?”

“Where’s Luna?’

“Luna has meetings today. All day actually. She also doesn’t have time to babysit”.

Luna, of course, didn’t show up for the rest of the day. Because I was by myself I had to entertain myself. To do this I went over chess moves and played against myself. It wasn’t as fun as playing with Luna or Lexa.

When the 15th rolled around I was alone again. It was harder to be alone on the 14th than the other days. I felt the need to have sex. I wanted Lexa to be around but I was alone. I didn’t want to send out pheromones as I was also tired. The feelings would come and go.

I was able to distract myself every now and then. The camp started to get loud with chatter and other things. I would sit by the entrance and listen. It kept me distracted.

Everyone was louder than usual. You could hear guards shouting orders as they trained people for a fight. You could hear people telling their families what they’ll be doing in case the Skaikru attacked. I also got to see Lexa for the first time in days. She was too tired to have a conversation.

October 15th, 5057

“Again!”

“My grandma moves faster than that and she’s dead!”

“I said again!”

“Move you maggots!”

They’re training them hard out there. They haven’t had one break all day. I can’t help but feel bad for them.

**_“Checkmate”._ **

I look down at the chessboard.

_ Did I just lose to myself? _

**_“You suck at this”._ **

“Yeah yeah”.

I start moving the pieces around again. With the pieces in their original spots I start another game. When I reach out to move a piece someone stops me.

“You’re going to lose if you do that”. Their arms wrap around me from behind. When they kiss my neck I know who it is.

“Lexa?”

“Hmm”.

“What are you doing here?”

“Thought I’d see my lovely mate”.

I push her arms off me. Turning around I point a finger at her. “You jerk!”

“And apparently she’s mad at me”, Lexa offers me her hand.

I slap it away and stand up.

“Suit yourself”, she moves over to the couch.

“You said you would visit. You promised I wouldn’t be alone”.

“I know-”

“You said we would have lunch together!”

“Cl-”

“You were supposed to bring cake!”. Frustrated, I grab a pillow and hit her. “You promised”.

Lexa takes the pillow from me. “I know, I’m sorry. I felt bad. I just had to do some things and those things added up and so on. But”, she points to the table. “I brought cake”.

Although I want to be mad I can’t. “I missed you”.

Lexa nods. She lies down on the couch. 

“Do you want cake?”

“No”. She yawns. “I already ate”.

“Well”, I look at the cake. “Thanks for bringing cake. Hey!”

Lexa bolts upright. She looks around panicked before looking at me. “Huh?”

“You ok?”

“Sorry… I dozed off”.

“Oh, well I was going to say…”, I trail off when I see Lexa nodding off to sleep. Leaving the cake on the table I walk over to her. I take a seat by her and pull her into my arms.

“Clarke?”

“You can sleep, y’know that right?”

Lexa looks up at me. “I thought-”

“Having you here is enough”.

Lexa slept the day away and when I woke the next morning, she was gone. But there was breakfast on the table. I assume she made it. I summed it up to her trying to apologize for leaving again.


	44. Chapter 44

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the late update.  
> Personal matters came up.

It’s been a few days since Skaikru was found on Trikru territory. They were looking for someone or so it seemed they were. Chances are they were looking for me. They also left a gift, message, to all of Trikru. Trikru lost people at the hands of Skaikru. One of them was Label, Luna’s assistant.

I took one thing from the message they left. They will stop at nothing to get me back.

This threat hanging over us stressed Lexa out as she knew they know where I am. To protect me Lexa had me stay inside the tent. She promised to visit me but that was a lie. I’ve only seen her once in the five days I was in there. I think a part of me is happy that I’m not seeing her too much. A few have said she’s scary since she’s tired.

Because of this reason I decided against sneaking out of the tent to see Lexa. So here I am standing at the edge of the forest alone.

October 16th, 5057

“This is such a dumb idea”.

**_“Yes it is”._ **

“We should turn around”.

**_“No we should not”._ **

This is dumb but I need to leave the tent. I’m suffocating inside. Sure Lexa will kill me but I need to leave. I need to think. I can’t do all that in the stupid tent. 

I look around to make sure no one is near. Once confirmed I step into the forest and hide behind a tree

**_“Ah yes, the forest experience of hiding behind a tree”._ **

I wait a couple of minutes before heading deeper into the woods. I should head somewhere Lexa would assume I would go. Like the stream.

It only takes 15 minutes to get to the stream. The stream is a slow moving stream. It’s also shallow. Like most streams this stream is relaxing. It’s so peaceful. Not to mention the occasional frogs you can see and the other creatures that’ll drink from it. Of course these animals keep their distance. 

After an hour at the stream I start making my way away from the stream. I walk in a random direction since I have no goal in mind. As long as I don’t stray too far I should be ok.

**_“Behind you!”_ **

Before I can turn around someone is grabbing my hair. They pull me back and towards them. 

“H-”, something is stuffed into my mouth preventing any more words. I start thrashing around trying to get away from them.

A gruff voice growls in my ear. “Hold still”.

**_“It’s a man”._ **

I have no chance against a man and based on his scent he’s an Alpha. Curse you second genders!

With no other solution I start pumping out distress pheromones. I pump them out at full speed. It takes a few minutes for my body to start feeling the strain of releasing that much pheromones. This could all be useless in the end.

A finger brushes against my neck. “You have a mte”, the man grumbles. 

I try to speak but it all comes out as gibberish.

“Dammit Clarke”.

_ He knows my name?! _

**_“Skaikru”, my wolf growls._ **

The man wraps an arm around my waist and lifts me off my feet. The Alpha stomps over to the stream.

“Forgive me”.

“Frori-”

He pushes me face into the stream.

The water runs over my body making it harder for me to release pheromones. I know he’s trying to prevent the smell from spreading and alerting someone. He can’t fight another person. He must be too weak. So much for an Alpha.

When I can’t hold my breath for any longer I start moving around in an attempt to get air. The man grabs my hair and lifts my head out of the water. He gives me a second to breathe before he dunks my head again.

This goes on for what feels like hours. Small amount of air then back in the water. Repeatedly. Over and over again.

**_“Dammit, why’d we leave?”. My wolf runs around her area. She slams against the invisible wall and barks at nothing. “Notice us!”, she shouts at nothing. “Please”._ **

The man stops dunking me. “That should be good”.

I take this time to cough out water. I feel both myself and the man freeze when someone growls. I look around as best as I can. In front of me two red eyes look over my shoulder and at the Alpha. 

The beast growls again. It starts out low and growls louder as seconds go by.

_ Uh oh. _

A massive black wolf steps out of the bush. Its eyes glow a blood red as drool drips from its jaws. I know I’m not the enemy as their eyes focus on the Alpha behind me. 

**_“Relax”._ **

I take in the features of the black wolf in front of me. Although its eyes are red there’s a thin ring of green around the pupils.

_ Lexa. _

********

(Lexa’s POV)

“Yes, yes I know”.

“She’s a real threat! I say get rid of her!”

Pinching the bridge of my nose I sigh. “I told you this. I am not getting rid of her!”

“And why the fuck not?!”, Indra shouts at me. “We already lost men to the Floukru battle. We can’t handle another battle. Not right now”.

“I know that-”

“Doesn’t seem like it!”

“In…”, I trail off. I got this feeling that something is off. Something isn’t right.

A strange feeling washes over me. It settles into my stomach creating a pit. I take a look around the room. I eye every object and look at the details. 

“Heda?”, someone asks.

I stand up fast enough that my seat flies back. I feel like the room is closing around me. Like I’m going to suffocate. My heartbeat speeds up as both panic and anger settle into the pit of my stomach.

I walk over to the window and look at my tent. The guards are desperately searching around my tent. They walk in circles around the tent and walk in and out of the tent.

“They lost her”, I growl.

“Lexa, is everything ok?”, Luna looks up at me.

_ Clarke. _

“Talk later”. I run out of the room and down the stairs, skipping steps as I do. Once I’m outside of the building I shift into a wolf and run into the forest. I follow the only trail I have available. The distressed smell of pheromones.

********

(Clarke’s POV)

Lexa steps forward. She snaps her jaws at the man as a warning. She takes another step forward, a growl rumbling from her throat. I question why she isn’t attacking him.

When five minutes have passed and the man hasn’t ran off Lexa leaps at him. A scream cuts through the forest as Lexa bites down on his arm and throws him into a tree.

Turning to me Lexa sniffs me all over trying to find evidence that I’m hurt.

Besides the few cuts on my face I feel fine. 

“I’m fine”, I whisper. “He didn’t hurt me”.

**_“You almost drowned you”_ ** , Lexa looks me in the eyes. 

The man gets up using the tree as support. “You ass”. He moves his hair out of his face finally letting me see his face.

“Bellamy?”

**_“You know him?”_ **

I nod. “Y-yeah”.

Growling Lexa attacks Bellamy again. He tries to attack her but she pins him down, her teeth inches away from his face.

“Lexa, don’t”.

She looks at me then back to Bellamy.  **_“You’re not serious”_ ** .

“Don’t”.

I can see Lexa fighting the urge to kill Bellamy. With a low growl she steps away from his and shifts back. “You got an hour. Run”.

Bellamy shoots a glare at me before turning and running off.

**********

“She should be ok”, Nico steps away from me. He packs up his stuff and makes his way to the tent exit. “Lexa, don’t be too hard on her”.

Lexa, who is pacing back and forth, grunts as a response.

“Take it easy Clarke”, Nico tilts his hat to me.

With him gone it’s just me and Lexa alone. Usually I’m happy for this but not when she’s seething with anger. I can almost see the smoke coming from her body.

“Le-”

“Not now!”, she snaps.

I nod. “Course”, I whisper. A few minutes pass before I say, “can I-”

“No!”, she faces me. “I don’t want to hear any words you have to say! Not right now. You had one job, ONE job; stay the fuck in camp but you can’t even listen to that!”

“I had to get out. I c-”

“Couldn’t stay inside the tent? Couldn’t stay safe?!”

“I couldn’t be left alone with my thoughts. I was going crazy”. I glance at her. “You wouldn’t understand”.

“No, no I understand. I just assumed you were mature enough to handle it! I told you to stay inside the tent so you would hopefully be safe while I figure out this”, she motions around her. “This”, she motions between us. “Mess. But no, you can’t stay still so you run out and disobey me!”

_ We’re a mess? Our relationship is a mess? _

**_“I mean-”_ **

**Shut it!**

“You put everyone at risk Clarke. Do you understand that? Your selfish act put everyone at jeopardy!”, her eyes find mine. “Are you sure you weren’t kicked out of your camp?”

I lower my head. “I… I’m sorry-”

“Y’know, no one demanded you stay here. No one begged me to let the lost Skairku blonde stay or even bring her to our safe, secure camp. I choose to let you stay and that was the worst fucking decision in my life!”, she shouts.

“You don’t mean that”, I whisper.

“I try to do something nice and it backfires! You come here and destroy not just my life but everyone else’s. You cause so much problems that not even Scooby Fucking Doo could solve them!”

**_“She didn’t say she meant it?”, my wolf attempts to cheer me up. When she sees it’s not working she backs into a corner._ **

I’m at a loss of words. I feel like I’ve been stabbed, not just once but multiple times. For once it’s not by someone I hate or someone who hates me… it’s by Lexa.

I know Lexa hates people crying when she’s mad so I blink the tears away. It’s a lot of blinking.

Lexa opens her mouth to say something then closes it. She does this repeatedly until she growls, angrily pulls her hair and turns away from me.

Once Lexa turns her back to me so she can take time to breathe, I stand up and run out of the tent. I take the back way so I don’t have to run through a crowd of people. Surely they heard everything. Tents aren’t that sound proof.

It only takes a second for the tears to start running down my face. Although my eyes are blurred, I keep running. I stumble over one of the many rocks in the forest and fall face first into the dirt.

I want to stay on the ground. I want it to swallow me up. It’ll be like I never existed. That should be fine. Who would miss me?”

**_“Get up. C’mon”._ **

Pushing myself to my knees I put my head in my hands and cry.

**_“Not now, you have to keep moving. Please”._ **

**Where?**

**_“I don’t know! Just get up.”_ **

“Clarke?”

**_“Clarke, please. Please!”_ **

I ignore my wolf and look behind me. I expect to see Lexa but a long haired Bellamy stands behind me. I’m too shocked to say anything to him.

Moving closer Bellamy pulls something out from behind him. He smiles at me. “Found you”.

I watch as he lifts up an object and swings it down. Pain shoots out from the back of my head causing a headache.

_ Ugh. _

“You won’t go down easily, huh? Well I can fix that”. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before y'all get mad about this or the next chapter remember that all things are official and I ain't changing crap. If I do then I have to change a million other things.


	45. Chapter 45

********

(Lexa’s POV)

_ I should go find the girl. _

**_“Most would’ve gone searching twenty… thirty minutes ago”._ **

I knew Clarke would leave the tent. She doesn’t seem to do good when it comes to anger and having to deal with it. Although, I did say some mean things. That much was my fault but she’s the one that left the camp and was almost kidnapped.

**_“She ran out forty minutes ago”._ **

Groaning, I roll my neck. “Ugh, fine”. I push away from the counter and leave the tent.

When I step outside everything seems normal. No one is in a panic. People casually buy stuff from stands and kids play their weird made up games. A group of girls giggle at people as they do each other’s makeup. There’s only one problem. There’s no Clarke. She’s not by Mackel’s stand or sitting by Luna.

I look towards the forest wondering if she’s out there. She can’t be that dumb… can she? 

**_“I mean…”_ **

Walking behind my tent I step into the forest. “Clarke?”

No response.

“Hey, I’m sorry”.

No response.

A lump forms in my throat when I see the dirt has been disturbed. When I realize they’re dragging line the lump in my throat grows.

_ Oh god. _

Shifting I sniff the dirt and attempt to follow the path. The lines begin to go in different directions, the scent of Clarke scattering. 

Refusing to give up I head back to camp and follow the trail again. I do this several times and end up with the same results. I can’t follow this stupid trail!

Like I’m in a movie rain starts to pour from the sky. It washes away any remaining signs of the trail and any scents that may have been there.

_ Dammit. Dammit, dammit, dammit. _

**_“Well don’t just sit in the rain”._ **

As I’m walking back to camp I feel heavier. My paws feel ten times their normal weight. I let my head hang as I walk into camp. I can see Luna looking at me but I ignore her. I don’t need her therapeutic words of encouragement.

I go into my tent and flop down on the floor.

_ I lost her. I yelled at her, she ran and now I lost her. _

********

(Luna’s POV)

About an hour ago I saw Clarke leave the camp. I wasn’t sure why she left considering she had to stay inside the tent. Lexa was also in the tent so she had to know Clarke left yet she didn’t go after her. Was it any of my business? No. So I let Clarke go.

As the minutes went by and she didn’t appear I knew something had to be up. As I was going to search for her Lexa walked out of her tent. She was out of camp for twenty minutes before the rain started. She came back after that, her head hanging. As soon as I saw her I knew that Clarke was gone. That she has been captured.

I know Lexa would’ve searched for hours if it weren’t for the rain. It’s useless to follow a scent trail in the rain.

Once Lexa was inside her tent I ordered guards to search the entire territory. A big group was sent to search near the Skaikru border. They didn’t protest or demand to know why which was relieving.

I just hope they find something. 

**********

“Lexa?”

A grunt.

“Hey”, I walk into the tent. “The guards. Th-”, I cut myself off when I see the state Lexa is in. She’s lying on the floor flicking the edge of a blanket. An empty bottle of wine lies by her head.

_ This is concerning. _

“I had guards search for Clarke. They searched five hours and found no sign of Clarke.”

Another grunt.

“I’m thinking she’s off the territory which means we have no way of getting to her without risking a war”.

More grunts.

“They tried bu-”

“I know”, she mumbles. “She’s gone”.

“Not ye-”

“Then why didn’t you find her?”

“She’s o-”

“Skaikru territory. We can’t do anything… she’s gone”.

“We could fig-”

“And risk wiping out our entire camp population?”

“Not if we wi-”

“We can’t for sure win”.

“So you’re giving up?”

She shrugs. “I don’t know”. Lexa grabs the wine bottle only to realize it’s gone. “I need another one”.

When she tries to get up I put a foot on her and step on her. “No, you need to be a leader”.

“Get off”.

“Where is leader Lexa?”

“I’m no leader.”

“Why’s that? What changed?”

She doesn’t respond.

“Lexa!”

“I can’t be a leader with no mate!”, she pushes my leg away. “Without Clarke I… I don’t know”.

“You’re lost”.

“Thanks”, she pushes herself to her knees. “I’ll just wither away with my wine bottles”.

“No!”. “You are not giving up. You’re not giving up on this pack, on me, on you. Especially not Clarke!”

Lexa raises her eyebrows at me. “Nice speech”, she scoffs.

“How did Clarke deal with you? Are you this much of an ass to her?”

Lexa glares at me. “Are you done?”

“That’s it. Alexandria Woods you are going to spend the rest of today and tomorrow getting your shit together then you, Alexandria Charmante Woods, will be the leader we all need right now. Guards!”

Indra and another guard run in. “Yes?”

“Take Heda to an empty tent. She is to spend the rest of today and tomorrow there. She may not leave unless it’s an emergency”.

Indra looks at Lexa then me. She nods. “Alright”.

“Can I at least have some wine?”

No one gives Lexa an answer as she’s led out of the tent. Once she’s gone I move over to the coffee table and look at a map. No wonder Lexa gave up. They have upgraded their security since I last checked. There are guards every ten feet all around the Skaikru border. No surprise they’re guarding the camp like crazy.

**_“We’re gonna need a good ass plan”._ **

October 7th, 5057

************

(Raven’s POV)

“Raven”, Abby walks around me. “You’ll get food and some rest once you tell me”. My chair is suddenly pulled back. “Where is my daughter?”

“Fuck off”.

Laughing she lets my chair fall back. “I know someone hurt you”. “I see it in your eyes. Someone said something and that’s why you’re back. Not because you were kidnapped. Tell me and I will let you get revenge on that person”.

I eye Abby trying to tell if she’s lying. “Revenge?”

She nods.

_ I’m sorry Clarke. _

“Trikru”, I whisper.

“Hmm?”

“Your daughter is hiding at the Trikru camp though she isn’t a prisoner. She is free to roam and do as she pleases. She’s there willingly. I uh…”

“Raven”, Abby crouches down. “What is it?”

“Nothing”.

Abby shrugs. “Well you were helpful nonetheless”.

I look away. I feel satisfied in some way but mostly angry… at myself. I betrayed one of my closest friends. Can I even call her a friend at this point?

October 16th, 5057

“It’s been days”.

“I know honey, you have to have patience. I’m sure they’re working things out”, John (forgot what I’ve been calling him. His name should be David...) attempts to calm his mate down.

“Working what out! How they’re going to deliver her body to us! My baby is probably so scared out there.”

_ You wish. _

“Abby”, Octavia runs into the medical tent. She’s panting as she looks around. “Outside… fence…”

Annoyed Abby looks at Octavia. “Spit it out”.

“Clarke! They found Clarke”.

_ No. _

I look at John who is already looking at me. I know we’re both thinking the same thing.

_ Poor Clarke.  _

I follow both Abby and Octavia outside. I move over to the shadows to watch.

The gates open slowly and in walks Bellamy. He looks homeless, his hair is long and has some mats, and a bear is beginning to grow. He’s also skinnier than when he left but he is strong enough to hold a passed Clarke in his arms.

Although she looks peaceful I know she didn’t pass out peacefully. She would never come here willingly then take a nap along the way.

I spot a rope hanging around Bellamy’s arm.

_ That son of a bitch choked her! _

Cautiously Abby approaches her daughter. When she looks at her an unseen gentleness shines in her eyes. I want to throw up when tears start going down her face. Seeing these tears makes me ask myself if she truly loves her daughter. I always assumed she kept her around to control her.

“Take her to my tent”. Abby motions to the medic tent.

Octavia takes a small step forward. “But Abby… what about Bellamy?”

“What about him?”

“Can he come back? To Skaikru?”

“Yeah, yeah whatever”.

Octavia smiles at her brother who smiles back.

Bellamy and Abby disappear into the medic tent with Clarke.

Through the corner of my eye I can see Octavia approaching me with a goofy smile on her face. “Can you believe it?”

I don’t respond.

“Bellamy is back. This is amazing”, her smile widens. 

“Whatever”.

“I have to thank you… I know you’re not happy about it but thanks to you I was able to tell Bellamy where to find her. I got my brother back so tha-”

Without thinking I slap Octavia. “Shut the fuck up! Stop talking to me, you have what you want. You got one thing but you lost two things.”

Octavia doesn’t respond. She gently touches her cheek.

“You lost two friends”.

“I don’t know why you pretend you’ve done nothing wrong. You told Abby where her daughter was. You’re no better than me!”

“Whatever Octavia”.

I look over Octavia’s shoulder. I wonder what’s happening at the Trikru camp. I can only imagine what Lexa is thinking right now. I’m sure something is going to come. And it won’t be pretty.

**********

********

(Clarke’s POV)

My head…

**_“Wake up”._ **

Everything is so foggy.

**_“Come on”._ **

Where am I?”

**_Upset my wolf barks sending pain through my body._ **

My eyes fly open. I bolt upright and look around. “Where… where?”

“Hey”, a hand touches me. “You’re ok”.

“Lexa? Where is… Raven?”

Raven smiles a sad smile. “Hi”.

“I thought you left.”

“I did”.

“But here you-”, I look around. Familiar walls. Familiar bed. I look at a chair. On the back hangs a familiar dress. “No”.

“Clark-”

“No! No, I can’t be back here. No!”

“Clarke, I’m so sorry”.

I try to get out of bed but something pulls against my arm. Looking at it I see IVs running into them. “Are these important?”

“Abby would suggest not-”

I tear the IVs out.

“Ripping them out but you did anyway”.

“I don’t care what she has to say or she has said”. I peel the tape off my skin. Slowly I climb out of bed and test my body. My feet feel numb but I’m sure I can manage to stand. My hands feel fine. My head is still hurting.

“Where is Abby anyways?”

Raven shrugs. “She left so I could be here when you woke up. She wants me to take care of you then you are to lie in bed”.

“Pfft”.

“Clarke, please try to behave. Just for now. Until we figure things out?”

“Ra-”

“Please. A million eyes are on us already. Don’t attract more”.

I nod. “Yeah, ok.”

She nods and stands up. I watch as she disappears into the bathroom.

“Hey Raven?”

“Hmm?”

“Why uh, why did you apologize?”

Raven peaks out of the bathroom. “I’m sure Abby will tell you as she tries to convince you she’s the only one that loves you in this entire world and that you need her”, she disappears again. “But, that will have to wait until tomorrow”.


	46. Short Chapter

October 17th, 5057

Raven wasn’t wrong.

As I’m sitting at the dinner table Abby tells me how much she loves me. And how this whole time that I was gone, she was worried sick. She said she tried everything to get me back but murder was the only way she could get their attention.

I have told her a few times that I was their willingly and murder wasn’t necessary but she brushes me off and says “you’re just confused”.

Abby has also told me that, if I am well enough, a wedding will be happening in two weeks. I have to have become accustomed to Skaikru life by then. I’m surprised she still wants me to marry Wells.

**_“Shouldn’t you tell her about your mate?”_ **

**I’m sure she’ll find out.**

Abby puts more food on my plate. “Don’t you ever wander off again. I’m sure you were scared out there. Now eat up, they must’ve starved you. Those savages”.

I look at John who is silently eating.

“Honey, don’t you want to say something to our daughter?”

He looks at Abby then me. “Right, uh Clarke, we love you. And support you”.

_ Liar. _

Abby’s smile falls. She sits across from me, her arms crossed as she looks at me. “Is there something you would like to tell us?”

“Not that I am aware of”.

“When you were knocked on I did a physical exam on you and found something interesting. Down there”.

I glance down.

“If I am correct you may be expecting”.

I choke on my food. “What?”

“Someone didn’t know but that’s no problem. Wells said he is willing to step up and be the father of the pup.”

_ Expecting… how? _

“I mated someone”.

“I know but I’m sure they were weak anyways. Wells is a powerful Alpha… I’m hoping his mark will do something to the other mark”.

I shake my head. “It won’t. The mark wasn’t made by some weak Alpha”.

Abby doesn’t respond.

“Last time I checked a leader isn’t weak”.

“Leader?”, John asks.

I nod. “Y’know Lexa. I assume you guys have met a few times”.

Abby grinds her teeth. She opens her mouth to say something but a growl comes out. Standing up she grabs a cup and throws it at a wall. “I’ll talk to you later”. With that she storms out of the room.

In the distance I hear a door slam shut.

I look at John who is already looking at me.

“Is it her pup?”

I nod.

“Do you love her?”

I nod again.

“Does she love you?”

“Yes”.

“Then I see no problem. As long as you are happy and can provide my grandchild with a happy life”.

“I can’t do that here”.

He nods and stands up. “I’m sure you and Raven have something planned”.

October 17th, 5057

********

(Lexa’s POV)

“What’re you looking at?”

Luna jumps out and faces me. “Lexa, you scared me.”

“Is that a map?”

“What’re you doing out of the tent?”

“I feel fine Luna”.

“No, you don’t look fine”.

“I’m fine!”, I walk over to the table. “I can’t sit back and wait.”

Luna walks over to me. “Well I had people scout the area. That is what they reported. It seems Skaikru is calm as of right now but I’m sure that is going to change at any moment”.

“They may appear calm but they will want to attack. Abby isn’t one for forgiving”.

“Especially when the enemy has mated with her daughter”.

“Especially that. We need to be prepared in case they attack us at this camp but I want to keep them away from the camp. Our best choice is near the waterfall. We won’t be able to hear them coming but they won’t hear us coming. I’m thinking some can be in the trees and others will face them on the ground.”   
“How do we know they’ll be at the waterfall?”

“We’ll reveal our location. Have people walk to the border and walk back. Someone is going to follow and reveal our location”.

“What if they attack the camp?”

“They’ll find no one there. Abby doesn’t want to destroy us, she wants to destroy me. If I’m not at that camp then they’ll just leave”.

“Wouldn’t she want to keep her daughter’s mate alive?”

“I never said she would kill me.”


	47. Chapter 47

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“Alright”, I look at Raven. “What’re we gonna do?”

“Well… Skaikru is going to attack sometime tomorrow, maybe tonight. We need to warn Trikru”.

I nod. “But how? We’re both stuck here”.

“Well I can come and go from this building. You can’t. What if I snuck out?”

“But you wouldn’t be able to come back”.

“Who said I wanted to. I’ll talk to Lexa and Luna about getting you out. I promise I won’t leave you here”.

“Are you sure?”

She nods. “Yes”.

“You’ll have to leave at night. Getting off the territory will be hard. Try using the trees to stay hidden”.

Raven nods. “Will you be ok on your own for a day or two?”

I shrug. “I really don’t know”.

“Clarke, try to keep things calm for as long as possible. Just until Trikru has time to prepare”.

**********

When someone knocks on my door I jump down from the window and toss my book onto the bed. “Come in”.

“There’s my lovely daughter”, Abby approaches me with her arms open. When I don’t hug her she frowns. She glances at my stomach. “And how are you feeling today?”

I cross my arms. “Cut the shit”.

“What ever do y-”

“Why are you here?”

Abby gasps, her hand going to her chest. “I am going to let your attitude pass since you are expecting but as soon as that kid is born you can bet we are having words”.

**_“Does she shut up?”_ **

“My lovely daughter, I wanted to tell you that your friend, Raven, not the actually good one, has left you”.

“Good one?”

“You know Octavia”, mom hums.

“I know Raven left”.

“Course she told you… was this part of some plan? Of course it was”.

“We didn’t come up with anything. It wasn’t right for me to make her stay any longer than necessary”.

Abby shakes her head. “Just admit it, your friend has left you”.

“What are you trying to prove? Show?”

When she steps towards me I step back. “Clarke, I know you want to leave because you fell for one of those… forest mutts and you think they love you but they don’-”

“And you do?”

“Yes, of course I do. I love you very much.”

“Sure does show”, I roll my eyes.

“All of the things I have done were for you. For your safety and you may hate me for those things but I will keep doing them if it means you and that baby are going to be safe”.

I look away from her. “I guess it is nice to uh… know there’s a safe place for my child to be”.

“Yes, way safer than that disgusting forest”.

“It’s not that g-”

“And once that baby is born he or she will be welcomed into this camp. They will have the best room and will live the best life I can provide for them”.

“You can provide?”

“Oh honey, you’re only 18. You’ll need a lot of my help”. Abby moves towards me. “I mean yes, I’ll have to step into the mother role once again but I am prepared for that.”

**_“What bullshit!”_ **

“And where am I in this… plan?”

“It depends on how your mental health is. I can’t have you telling lies to my grandson. If you don’t shape up then your role may be the sister role more than a mother role”.

“That-”

“Oh! That reminds me”, she claps her hands. “Come, come. I have something to show you. You’re going to love this”.

“I’d rather stay-”

Abby grabs my hand and starts walking. She walks out of the bedroom, down the hall and into another bedroom.

The bedroom has three gray walls. Each wall has very little decorations except for empty picture frames. In one corner there’s a swing chair made of wood.

The fourth wall is painted like the ark wall, a painted glass window shows the stars you would see from the Ark. 

“What is this for?”, I move around the room.

“The baby’s room of course”. Abby motions to a box on the floor.

I walk over to it. The box has a picture of a crib on its side.   
“It’s a nice little nursery”.

“Ark themed?”

“Just to remind them of where we came from. I’ll have workers bring in toys. Some for fun, others educational”.

“This is all so nice b-”

“Oh and your kid will have a friend as soon as he is born. Octavia, O I believe you guys call her, is pregnant. Your kids will be the bestest of friends. That is so cute! I can not wait”.

********

(Raven’s POV)

“Stop!”, three guards run up to me. They hold out their weapons and take small steps towards me. “Why are you here?”

“I have to tell your leader something”.

“This is a trick”.

“No, I promise. I have something to say about Clarke”.

The guards glance at one another.

“Clarke?”

“Yes, Clarke”.

“As in Heda’s mate?”

I nod.

“The blonde?”

Another nod.

“Come”.

“We lead you there but watch you closely.”

“I know”.

**********

“Heda”, one guard nervously peaks into a tent. “A Skaikru woman wishes to talk to you…”. He motions for me to walk in. “We watch you”.

I step into the tent. Much to my surprise Lexa isn’t an emotional mess. She’s sitting on the couch drinking water as she looks down at a map.

“I didn’t expect to see you so soon”.

“I didn’t expect to come back”.

“Then why are you here?”, Lexa looks at me. “Wish to talk to Luna?”

“No”, I shake my head. “I want to talk to you about Clarke”.

I can see Lexa tense. “What about her?”

“As you know my people got her”.

Lexa nods. “And?”

“Well she wants to leave but she can’t, not yet. I am here to help since I’ve been inside”.

“And what makes you think we need your help?”

“Well to start”, I walk over to the map. “You have your map wrong. That’s not where the guards wait. They’re further into the forest. And there’s no guards at the fence, not anymore”.

I look around. On the table there’s a blank map. I take that and start drawing where the guards are. I use different colors for different times. “At ten they train the new guards. So if you were to attack, attack at ten. It’ll be less of a challenge. And ov-”

“How is Clarke doing?”

I look at Lexa. She’s avoiding my eyes. “She’s hanging out in her room”.

“Are they treating her nice?”

“As nice as you can treat a prisoner… her mom is trying to manipulate her. Tell her lies. The usual”.

“She’s not sick, hurt, injured?”

“No but she… she uh she’s lonely.”

Lexa nods. “Ok”.

“How do you know so much about the rotations?”

_ That voice. _

I turn around. “Luna”, I nod.

“Raven”.

“I’m sorry for leaving so sud-”

“How do you know so much about the rotations?”.

**_“She cut you off”._ **

“When I got back I started paying attention so I could sneak out. I was going to come back so I could be with Clarke but then she showed up so… I memorized them for your guy’s advantages”.

Luna nods. “Did you have any part in the kidnappings?”

“Luna”, Lexa glances at her. “Not now”.

“No, now”.

I shake my head. “Of course not.”

“So they just knew where Clarke was?”

“One neighboring clan didn’t have her so the other had to”, I shrug. “What can I say? Logic is logic”.

Luna eyes. “Right”, she looks away. “Whatever you say”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last two chapters will be updated tomorrow.  
> When will I start uploading the second fix of this series? Idfk.  
> I'm actually writing a Korrasami fic so I can get away from clexa for a few days. I just need a small break from the cute adorable couple.


	48. Sudden Time Skip

November 15th, 5057

“That’s not how it works”. I hug my legs. “At seven in the morning there will be double the guards than usual because they will be switching with people. However, during the other switches they go to the camp to switch”.

Lexa eyes me. “That is the dumbest crap ever. They leave themselves exposed”.

“Exactly!”, I point at the map. “They are exposed”.

“But that’s too easy. Your people can’t be that dumb”.

“They are”.

“No, impossible”, Lexa shakes her head.

“Ugh”, I lie back.

“Be patient”, Luna nudges me with her shoulder. “She does this a lot”.

I smile at Luna. I wish I could do more, hug her or even kiss her but we’ve decided against doing that in front of Lexa since she doesn’t have her mate with her. I can’t remember the last time she had a full night sleep and didn’t wake up whimpering.

I’m still surprised Luna forgave me. At first it was hard. She wouldn’t even talk to me. Took time but after seeing how Lexa suffered she forgave me. We’re still working on trust though. I can’t help but feel guilty. Clarke is without her mate and Lexa is without hers.

“Are you listening?”. A pencil flies over my head.   
“Yes, of course”. I smile at Lexa. “Please, go on”.

_ I’m gonna kill her. _

********

(Clarke’s POV)

“Isn’t this adorable!”. Octavia holds up a baby shirt. “I got you one too. They can match”.

“Fun”. I fake a smile. 

**_“We need to get out of her. I am sick of this baby shit!”_ **

_ You and me both. _

We can’t just get up and leave.

“How are things going in here?”

I glance at the doorway. “Fine, just talking about baby stuff”.

_ Again. _

Wells walks over to me. Smiling, he plants a kiss on my head. “Come, I want to show you something”. His hand splays over my stomach. “And you too little man”.

“I hate to go but duty calls”.

Octavia smiles at me. “Go, it’s fine”.

I follow Well’s out of the room. Not much to my surprise he leads me to the baby’s room.

“The crib is done”.

“So I see that”. I watch as Wells excitedly walks around the room. He points at small details and this and that. Instinctively I start twisting the wedding ring. I always hate talking about baby stuff. Wells gets so excited about being a dad. It sucks because I plan on leaving in two days. I hate to do that to him but the baby’s real parent isn’t here.

“You beat me to it Wells”, Abby walks into the room.

“Oh Abby, I wanted to talk to you”, I fake another smile. 

“I should get going”. On his way out Wells kisses my cheek.

_ I feel so dirty. _

“So, I am thankful for everything everyone is doing for me and this baby”.

Abby nods.

“And I hate to sound… not thankful but I don’t want to raise my kid here”.

“In this building? We can get you a hut”.

“No, this camp”.

Abby frowns.

“It’s… He has the right to know there’s freedom outside those walls and Trikru provides that.”

“You want him to be Trikru?”

I shrug. “I don’t know… I want him to know freedom”.

“This is freedom”.

“Freedom with limits isn’t freedom”.   
“If he is born in Trikru he won’t want to live here”.

“Then maybe the problem isn’t Trikru”.

Abby shakes her head. “Everything was going so nice. Everything was peaceful. You are Octavia were talking about baby stuff. Wells stepped into the empty parent role and all you had to do was go along with it”. She steps towards me. “But no, everything has to be hard! I was planning on letting Trikru live. Letting them continue with their life and we continue on with ours but instead I have to attack them all because of you”.

“What does attacking do for you?”

“If I kill that dumb forest mutt then you’d have no reason to return”. Abby makes a motion with her fingers. Three guards walk into the room. 

One guard stands behind me, the other two are by my side.

“Take her to her room. Lock her up, she is not to leave no matter what”.

One guard shoves me forward.

“I’m walking”. I turn to Abby. “Once you defeat the Trikru, if you manage to, are going to lock me up forever? I’ll still want to leave”.

“Not if your kid is here”.

The guard shoves me again. I stumble forward.

“I’m walking!”

“No you’re not”.

Sighing, I walk out of the room. On my way to my room I come across Margaret who is putting on new sheets. 

“Hello M’lady, taking a nap?”

“No”, I step into the room. “I’m being locked up here”.

“Oh heavens me, what did you do?”

“You know, the usual”.

Margaret shakes her head. “I do find that it would be easier if you were to get along with your mother”.

“Ma-”

“I know it is not easy but… she does try to do what is best for you”.

“By locking me up”.

She nods. “If she sees it fit then it is to be done. That’s how things are around here. Anyways, I will see you later tonight M’lady. Try not to break out”.

“Margaret, do you not know me?”

This cracks a smile on Margaret’s face.

**********

Opening my window I look down. There are three guards waiting at the bottom. One guard smiles and waves at me.

“Asshole”. I walk over to my door and look through the small window.

Two guards are guarding the door. Tough and Gruff, the twins who never smile.

“Margaret, lady Clarke is sleeping”.

“I am not here for M’lady. I am here to tell you that Abby has requested to see you”.

“And who will guard this door?”

Two skinny guards walk over to the door. “Us”.

Margaret nods.

I’m surprised to see the two twins walk away leaving newbies at the door. Once the twins are gone Margaret opens my door.

“M'lady”.

“Hi”.

“You are calm for what is happening”.

I tilt my head. “Meaning?”

“Do look out your window while I prepare your clothes”.

I walk over to the window and look out. The three guards are gone and the streets are strangely empty. No guards are guarding the gate. All lights are off.

In the distance I see people disappearing into the forest. They hold torches and shout something.   
“What’re they doing?!”

“War”. Margaret hands me a set of clothes. “No go change and run”.

“Run?”

“Yes”.

“Margaret… why?”

“Hmm… I am not quite sure. I do know I will suffer great consequences but I couldn’t sit back and let this happen. I know you love someone in that camp and you don’t want to be here. You’ve never really belonged but I feel you did belong in that camp. I want to help you”.

“Oh Margaret”.

“Now go”.

I’m about to run off when I look at Margaret. “I can’t leave you here”.

“Dearest, I-”   
“You’ll die! I can’t let that happen”.

Margaret shakes her head. “I was due to die years ago”.

“Then come with me. I’m sure I can convince Lexa to let you stay. You could… could nanny my children like you did me”.

Margaret looks around as she thinks. “But what if she wo-”

“She will”, I take her hand. “Please”.

********

(Lexa’s POV)

“They’re here!”, Raven runs into Luna’s arms. “The Skaikru. They’re approaching”.

“And the camp?”

“No one is at Trikru camp. Everyone at the camp is hiding, some have started leaving and moving into the trees away from the fight”.

“Good, is Abby leading her people?”

“Yes”, Raven nods. “And Clarke’s would’ve been mate is there too”.

“No Clarke”.

“Of course, she’s-”

I look at Raven waiting for her to continue. “You’ve been doing that a lot. You’ll say something then stop”.

Raven shrugs. “I promised Clarke something”.

I nod. I look towards the Skaikru camp.

_ If I do win, how do I get Clarke out? _ _   
_ “Lexa”.

I look up.

Abby smiles at me as she sits on top of a white horse. She tries to hide her shock. “Nice to meet the mutt that marked my daughter”. She jumps off her horse and hits it on the butt. The horse runs into the forest. “So you are prepared to die.”

I don’t respond.

“Ready to meet your mate?”

I know Clarke isn’t with Abby. “What are you talking about?”

“Oh, you haven’t heard?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Well my daughter… has passed. I am here to do you a favor so you can join her. Two mates forever together”.

**_“What?!”_ **

Growling I step forward. “You’re lying!”

“No, in fact her funeral is tomorrow”.

**_“Asshole!”_ ** . Pain shoots through my body as my wolf breaks through the surface.

********

(Raven’s POV)

“Luna”, I whisper. “Is… has she always been that big?”

Luna doesn’t respond.

“And muscular?”

No response.

“Also since when have her eyes been red?”

“Raven”, Luna nudges me. “Shush”.

I want to say something else but a howl breaks through the sky. It sounds sad and mourningful.

_ Oh Lexa. _


	49. Chapter 49

********

(Clarke’s POV)

Once I step into the forest I hide behind a tree. I only step out once I’ve shifted.

Margaret looks at the dirt and everything else with some form of disgust. “Do tell me it is cleaner at the camp”.

**_“Hear that?”_ **

I head in the direction my mom went. Their scents are strong making it easy to follow. As I’m walking a distant sound of growling becomes more clear.

I come to a stop by a tree. Looking around it I see a mix of humans and wolves going at one another. A big black wolf is killing humans like it’s nothing. Its red eyes are focused on one person.

Abby.

“Oh dearest, do tell me that isn’t some stray wolf”.

Ignoring Margaret I turn away from the fight and follow a path up to the top of the waterfall. I watch for a few minutes as they go at one another.

_ Let’s end this. _

I tilt my head back and let out a howl. The fighting stops as soon as I do.

Behind me Margaret steps behind a tree to stay hidden and watch from a distance.

I look down at everyone. All eyes are on me.

**_“Do something”._ **

I look at Lexa who looks more calm now that I’m here. Her eyes are no longer red as she gazes at me.

When I look at Abby I see anger.

“What are yo-”

I bark at Abby to get her to stop talking. She looks shocked I would do such a thing.

I take my time walking down the waterfall. As I walk I keep my eye on Lexa. I have a feeling she started this fight.

I step past Skaikru and Trikru. Once I’m close enough I push my face into Lexa’s fur. An all too familiar scent of the forest wraps around me. It’s like I’m walking deep into the forest, an unknown part of the forest.

Stepping away from Lexa I look up at her. I gaze into her eyes to try and read her but they reveal nothing. No emotion.

**_“Are we not mad at her?”_ **

**Don’t know.**

**_“We should be”._ **

I let out a small whimper only Lexa can hear. I nip at her ear causing Lexa to shake out her fur. When I bite her again she nudges my face trying to get me to stop.

_ Fine. _

I turn away from Lexa and look at Abby. She’s glaring at Lexa as she uncrosses and crosses her arms repeatedly.

Lexa steps forward. I feel her quickly lick the side of my face.

Abby groans. “Clarke, get out of the way.”

Shifting I cross my arms. “Don’t do this. Stop the fighting.”

“I’m doing this for you, now move”.

“You’re not doing anything for me. You’ve never done anything for me. It’s always been about you”.

“That’s not tr-”

“Who wasn’t around for my birthdays because celebrating them was an inconvenience?”

“I got you pre-”

“I didn’t want presents!”, I dig my nails into my skin. “I wanted a mother”.

“Honey, we can talk all this out when we get back to camp”.

“I’m not going back! I’m not going back to the hellhole you lock people up in. The place you spread lies and hides truths! I’m staying here”.

“Now Clarke, you are just confused”, she steps towards me.

Reacting quickly I reach behind me and pull the knife out of my pocket. I press it to my throat which gets Abby to stop moving.

Behind me Lexa lets out a small whimper. 

“For once I’m not confused. I’m not lost. I’m not… I’m not blinded. Why can’t you see that?”

“Put the knife down and we can talk.”

“I don’t want to talk, I’m sick of trying to talk to you. You don’t listen.”

When Abby steps towards me, Lexa steps forward.

I look behind me. From the corner of my eye I see Abby lunge towards me. I step back so I’m standing by Lexa. “Don’t or I swear I will”, I press the knife harder. Watching Abby’s reaction I know she won’t do anything.

Abby looks around for some escape. She’s finally cornered. “Why? I’m doing this for you!”

“No you’re not!”, I scream. I feel my anger finally hit some boiling point. “You’ve never done anything for me!”

“That-”

“It’s true mom! Ever since I was little everything you did was for you. Everything. Whether it be locking me in my room so I don’t find love or ignoring me to the point it’s abuse”.

“I was protecting you”.

“From what? From the fence? The dirt? The trees? You screwed up as a person so you tried to force me to be the you that you wish you were. I’m not mom. I’m not some surgeon or a leader of the Sky people. I’m Clarke”, tears start running down my face. With my free hand I grip onto my pants to stop the shaking. “I finally stop letting you run my life and I found things. I found me. And I love it. I may not be you but I’m me. I’m the daughter of a workaholic mom. The daughter of a stay at home dad who did strange experiments. I’m the sky person who ran off, ran from everything and fell in love with a Trikru woman. I found a mate I thought I would never find. I found a home in a place I never thought I would. I’m not like you”, I smile at her. “And that’s ok. It may not be to you but it is for me.”

Abby looks from me to Lexa. “This is your fault!”

“No”, I turn the attention back to me. “She gave me what I always wanted. Love, a home. A feeling of safety. You said I should have a goal and do anything to get it. Now that I have it… why do you want to get rid of it?”

Abby doesn’t respond. She looks at the ground refusing to meet my eyes. “I’m sorry”. She makes a movement with two fingers.

The first Skaikru to attack is someone I haven’t met. They charge at Lexa. Shifting I leap at them. I feel my teeth sink into their throat. Without thinking I bite down and kill them. When I drop the body I look at Abby.

**_“You”, my wolf speaks. “Don’t have to do this”. She digs her feet into the ground. “But if you attack, we will too.”_ **

Abby looks to the Trikru then at the dead person. Sighing she nods. “You’ll come back”. With that she turns and walks away. Before she’s out of earshot she says, “Forest mutts and Skaikru shouldn’t breed but what’s that to you”.

**_“No she didn’t!”_ **

Before my wolf can’t attack I shift back.

**This is so not the place.**

**_“She insu-”_ **

**If we attack then we have to explain ourselves.**

I hear Abby snicker as she walks away.

As soon as she is gone I turn to Lexa. She’s shifted back.

“Anti climatic”, Lexa mumbles.

“Nice to see you too”.

Lexa looks at me. “Hi”, she smiles.

I look down at her hands. She keeps them busy like she’s holding herself back. “Le-”   
“I want those in the trees to follow Skaikru, make sure they leave our territory”.

“Sha Heda”, the trees seem to talk.

Lexa turns away from me. “Half of you follow at least fifty feet behind the people in the tree. The rest of you are to return to camp and make sure no Skaikru is near”.

_ No Skaikru… Margaret! _

“Margaret, you can come down.”

Margaret steps around a tree. “Oh dearest me, that was quite the scene”.

Lexa’s eyes go from me to Margaret then back to me. “Care to explain?”

“That’s Margaret, former Skaikru”.

“And?”

“She’s been my nanny since I was born, I couldn’t leave her”.

“Clar-”   
“She can’t go back, they’ll kill her”.

“Then you shouldn’t have brought her”.

“She helped me escape”.

Lexa growls, rolling her neck. “You did?”, she eyes Margaret.

Margaret nods. “It was sad seeing M’lady sitting there all pity this and pity that”.

Lexa looks at me. When she does I give my best puppy eyes. “Ugh, fine. Fine but she is your responsibility until she… fits in”.

“She’ll find a spot, I know she will”, I smile at Lexa.

“Luna, take this woman back to camp”.

Luna nods. “What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know yet”.

Behind me a twig snaps. I look over my shoulder expecting to find Skaikru.

**_“You’re being paranoid”._ **

I feel myself jump again as something brushes against my arm.

“Hey”, Lexa puts her hands up. “Just me”.

“Right”, I nod. I let Lexa take my hand.

She runs her fingers slowly up my arm then back down. “You’re cold”.

“It uh, it happens”. I step away from Lexa only to bump into Luna.

**_“What an asshole”, my wolf swipes at nothing. I know she’s still on the defensive as she doesn’t want anything to do with Lexa._ **

There’s a hard slap on my back. “You’re staying right?”, Luna nudges me.

I look up at Luna. When I do a strange relaxation sweeps over me. My wolf seems to settle down at the sound of her voice. “I don’t know”.

“You have to”, Raven walks up to me. I see her eyes glance at my stomach. “Please, you got me here. There’s Luna. A good camp that isn’t surrounded by a fence and your mate, Lexa. The leader of not just one clan but like… several others.”

At the mention of Lexa’s name I unintentionally growl.

**_“Let’s kill it! Rip its throat out”._ **

I look at Lexa knowing full well whose throat my wolf wants to rip out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry that this book is left on a cliffhanger. Don’t fear though, there is a middle book. It just has some details and explains what happened after all this.


	50. Note

This note will later be deleted because it's worthless (to some extent). But uh, I'm basically writing this to say that 'part two' is finally out . . . or updating at least. I don't know how frequent the updates will be. Considering my schedule I can't promise anything.


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